About To Lose A Good Girl. Please Help!

This might turn out to be a lengthy read, please bear with me. The bashing and insults will be unnecessary as i have already told myself hurtful things a thousand times over.

So i am 29 and have a girlfriend who’s 25 we are both graduates; she’s a nurse and i am a practicing engineer and we’ve been dating for 3+ years now and preparations are underway to tie the knot this year God willing. Something happened last year, she suggested i move to a bigger apartment so that we can start buying household items and everything necessary to start a home as we are looking to get married soon which we did; i got a bigger place, met her parents she met mine. In a nutshell everything seems to be going well, we even started a business together and set to take on the future together before the devil struck (i take blames for my actions as i am not overly religious)

Around June last year, i met a girl (very fine girl) in the new area i moved to, although i have been seeing the girl around but one day as i was driving in i saw her hiding somewhere close to my compound avoiding the rain with her friends so i took them in until the rain subsided we exchanged contacts and started texting on WhatsApp a few days later. And soon after we started having sex (protected sex), prior to that time i never cheated on my girlfriend.

The sex continued, up to 2 times a week sometimes 3 as it was relatively easy as she lived very close and my girlfriend only visits on the weekend and never sleeps out (she’s from a very good and wealthy family with proper moral upbringing). Most evenings when return from work conji just do me one kind i don cross street other times she calls until we became comfortable having unprotected sex

So late October 2019, the new girl (I’ll call her Lola) texted me that’s she’s not feeling too well and i asked her to visit the hospital to run a test to know what to treat. She came back with a pregnancy test result proving she’s already 3 weeks pregnant, i was sure it was mine but i didn’t panic as she had a bf and i have my gf we were just for the sex at least that’s what we told each other.

So i asked her to remove the pregnancy, but got the shocker when she said she’s never going to remove the pregnancy that she’s 27 and have no desire to marry me or stay with me but she’s going to have the child. Omo my heart flipped. I begged her for like 3 weeks until she got mad and stopped taking my calls, she even moved away from her apartment. So i texted her and arranged a meeting, we sat down and discussed at length but she was still bent on keeping it, i got furious and told her i am not ready to be part of the child’s life if she’s going through with it as i see no reason why she wants to have my child when she knows we are NEVER going to be together, that was when she said she had already told her family that i am not interested in the child and they support her to keep it and let the child bear their family name. I discussed the matter with two friends a boy and a girl and the asked me to let her have the child first.

One month passed fast forward to early December, Lola called 6 times i was so shocked. I couldn’t take her calls. She texted that she’s ready to terminate the pregnancy since i am wicked and unconcerned she rained all manner of derogatory words but i was only concern with her decision to let go. I called and we agreed to meet the following day, I skipped work that day and met with her and her elder sister and elder sister’s friend. The sister and her friend were so mean but i was unmoved; i don already fuckup and ready to take anything to let it all go away because the knowledge of things will destroy my girlfriend.

So Lola entered my vehicle and we drove out, on our way to the hospital for her to terminate the pregnancy plus treatment she’ll take afterwards and for the damages i have caused her. She’s going to need 150k from me, i was furious and told her i don’t have that kind of money talk less of handing it over to her for something like this (i sure don’t know what i cost but i know it’s not up to 50k). She said if i don’t give her what she want she’s going to have the baby and that i should be thankful that she’s coming up with this that if she had listen to her friends advices she would have moved to my house with all sort of troubles (she was right) but i didn’t give in just yet. I dropped her off and ask her to have the child that am not going to give her the money as i don’t have it (I get the money sha).

So two days passed, she called again and after many arguments we agreed at 100k, made her to sign a NDA not to bother me again and all, I transferred her the 100k that night, she confirmed receipt and promised to go with it the following morning and that was the last I have heard or seen or her since then, until 3 weeks ago when another of her sister called from Canada and was asking if i am Me, that she’s been seeking my contact for a while now that Lola friend had to steal the number Lola’s phone and pass it to her as Lola has been hiding my phone number from the rest of the family and she doesn’t know the arrangement i have had with her but i should know that she’s having the child, she just thought i should know that i have a child somewhere when the baby eventually drops.

Knowing fully well that i am a shitty person to have done something terrible to myself and my girlfriend and all our future plans because of cheap sex, but I’ll be a more terribly bad person to have knowledge of a child somewhere and not be in his/her life. I called Lola but she didn’t take i texted her about her sisters call she called back to know who called and was furious, she ended the call (I guess to call her sister back) and called back again in about 20mins and asked me not to ever call her line again. I replied her text she should tell her family not call me as well. I have dodged to her apartment building a coupe times but she’s not been around for weeks as i was made to believe.

So i bought a ring to engage my girl few weeks ago but had to hold first to see how things play out, i can’t go ahead and marry my girlfriend with this kind of secret untold; that will be wickedness from the pit of hell and i still don’t know how to break it to her, it will destroy her.

I jokingly painted a similar scenery to my girlfriend; her response was: she will not marry me because if she does she will kill me in my sleep. That everybody is expecting us to get married this year, she now have high respect from her family because of me and this kind of thing happens both of us will die. Omo fear catch me.

Fellow Nairalanders, this is my predicament please advice a stupid brother. Insults are welcome as I hope to pick a thing or two from your comments. MODs please push this up biko.

This story long o

But the story sweet sha

Tell her the truth and if she did not forgive you
Run away for your life.
Mk your case no be like mayram

But free Toto dey sweet
Chai #100 will have save you from this mess you put yourself into

abeg guys,stop lamenting....focus on yourself,. make money, forget about ladies now,

Some guys can talk to any girl in this world but still fail at an interview!!!

Did your confidence disappear?

this stuff long abeg,
Na novel you dey write?
To the point,
If you think the girl will later blackmail you, then it's better to come clean to your girlfriend and accept the effects even if it will null the wedding.

If you can deal with the lies and believe the girl will never bother you(which is unlikely), then you shouldn't bother telling her.

Only the truth can set you free you have to tell your girlfriend because a child can’t be hide because this your baby mama will come to malpulate you with the kid so tell her if she’s okay u go on with the wedding but u no try at all bros .

When I have the strength, I will come back to advice you.

Meanwhile let me discharge this girl that came over, I no Bleep again. Your story touch me. Few minutes of ecstasy with lifetime regrets and guilts. I no get babe ooh.

As a man if you can control yuh d!ck u v solved 90% of your problems... My advice is this do not engage yuh girlfriend just yet, n something tells me that the side chick is going to go through wiv the pregnancy, my guy finally yuh case strong.o, u see wetin free t0to wan do yuh life, Chaii, the girl always had badt intention right from the start n u too go mumu gree remove condom... At the end of the day if care is not taken u might end up losing all both the baby n yuh girl... So u learn n move on...

One of the key thing in a relationship is trust. Without trust then the relationship is null and void. Having said that you need to seat your girlfriend down to explain the situation of things to her. If she is yours and genuinely love you, she might give you a second chance. A broken relationship is better than a broken marriage. Putting it in your mind too that you can't eat your cake and have it. If you go ahead with the wedding without letting her know about the deed, she can file for divorce. Pls, do what is right.

FUCKGRATULATIONS.

The truth....no secrets lasts forever. E mindful of what she said but still open up. Believe me, she will be hurt but will come around later

Youngkingjaey1:
This story long o

But the story sweet aha

Aswear, no be lie

it's too late to cry when the head is off...
u don bleep enta draw soup...
just japa from DAT compound and move in to another area...
change ur numbers and delete ur old social media accounts...she don sign d NDA so try moving on...no tell ur girl oo,na bad idea..u say u paint am a scenario n her response was scary..make ur case no go turn to Maryam own oo...

..

You already getting good advice here open up and tell your GF she will surely be heart broken. You have made your mistake learn from it and don’t repeat it again. If she has the baby you have to step up and take care of your child, don’t allow another to take responsibility of your child ooo be wise pls

My concern is what my girlfriend will do to herself, if she leaves I’ll have my self to blame and move on. if i have my way i will pay child support to for the child when he/she come out after a DNA test of course. But I’ll never marry a desperate woman. I was thinking of calling Lola on another phone and set up a meeting to let her i know I’ll pay child support. But not sure if i should wait for the child to be born first or just do it today. I have been really restless for many weeks.

Brothers learn from my mistakes abeg

IcraveLove:
Please break up with your girlfriend and focus on your baby mama.

Shaiyz95:
it's too late to cry when the head is off...
u don bleep enta draw soup...
just japa from DAT compound and move in to another area...
change ur numbers and delete ur old social media accounts...she don sign d NDA so try moving on...no tell ur girl oo,na bad idea..u say u paint am a scenario n her response was scary..make ur case no go turn to Maryam own oo...

I told my girlfriend i want to move out, she nor gree o. She said she like the place and we will stay there until i complete my building which is still at the very early stages.

Youngkingjaey1:
This story long o

But the story sweet aha

Omo nor vex, I have been thinking of doing this since, as i dey toilet dey burn my Steven Keshi i just say make i share get some advice and also make other learn from my life mistake.

Jeffmonti:
My concern is what my girlfriend will do to herself, if she leaves I’ll have my self to blame and move on. if i have my way i will pay child support to for the child when he/she come out after a DNA test of course. But I’ll never marry a desperate woman. I was thinking of calling Lola on another phone and set up a meeting to let her i know I’ll pay child support. But not sure if i should wait for the child to be born first or just do it today. I have been really restless for many weeks.

Brothers learn from my demise abeg

..

Jeffmonti:


Omo nor vex, I have been thinking of doing this since, as i dey toilet dey burn my Steven Keshi i just say make i share get some advice and also make other learn from my life mistake.

Haa egbon
The only advice I can borrow you is that call your pastor,cleric or close family member and explain everything to them, that they should help you to beg your gf and you have realized your mistake and make she forgive you.
And if she insist that she wan break up with
Let her go ahead, at least you try your best to tell her the truth before you engage her.

Pay your unborn child bill and look for another girl to marry

But free Toto dey sweet aha

the write up is longer than the op problem.

Tell her d truth, ....

My guy this your matter tie wrapper o come geolock the wrapper self.

My guy advising you is tough cos you don't even know the final decision of that Lola of a girl..she can wake one day and just change her mind when the tussle and hassle of raising a child single handedly start to surface and if by then you are married to your current girl without her knowing of such incidence that can take a very bad turn.

From another perspective..what if the girl has truly terminated the pregnancy, then that may seem more safer for your relationship or marriage sake to your current girl.

I will advice you call the girl or text her, tell her u have something very urgent or lie to her that you guys have a strong family thingy that you must discuss with her..just to ascertain if she is still preggy...if that works and you meet her..two things are involve..

1 she is till preggy, (don't even bother asking her y she kept it..just accept she is having the baby)

if that is the case just open up to your financee o, let her know that all you want from that Lola is just the baby..invite your family to help pacify her as well

2. She is not preggy again...then you know what is best to do.

But no matter how it plays....remember any decision you make today..you will surely face the consequences in the future..(just like the 30seconds cum inside Lola honey-pot of yesterday is about to cost you a good girl)

I rest my case.

cc. Lalasticlala

Vision2045:
My guy this your matter tie wrapper o come geolock the wrapper self.

My guy advising you is tough cos you don't even know the final decision of that Lola of a girl..she can wake one day and just change her mind when the tussle and hassle of raising a child single handedly start to surface and if by then you are married to your current girl without her knowing of such incidence that can take a very bad turn.

From another perspective..what if the girl has truly terminated the pregnancy, then that may seem more safer for your relationship or marriage sake to your current girl.

I will advice you call the girl or text her, tell her u have something very urgent or lie to her that you guys have a strong family thingy that you must discuss with her..just to ascertain if she is still preggy...if that works and you meet her..two things are involve..

1 she is till preggy, (don't even bother asking her y she kept it..just accept she is having the baby)

if that is the case just open up to your financee o, let her know that all you want from that Lola is just the baby..invite your family to help pacify her as well

2. She is not preggy again...then you know what is best to do.

But no matter how it plays....remember any decision you make today..you will surely face the consequences in the future..(just like the 30seconds cum inside Lola honey-pot of yesterday is about to cost you a good girl)

I rest my case.

cc. Lalasticlala

Thanks man, I’ll do just that.

Own up to your mistakes bigman. Sooner or later. The girl you're tryna marry will find out ND that would definitely be worse if you've already married her. That's double betrayal.
* You cheated. (Might be forgiveable)
* You have a son. (might be difficult)

I really don't blame the other lady. She is tryna hol on to you with the pregnancy because she prolly has seen big potentials in you.
I would call her an opportunist in that sense which is why she won't abort.
Let your other partner know now. Don't start your marriage with deceit. It won't last !!
Why go through divorce when you can avoid it and if at all she allows things to slide. You're never going to enjoy the marriage.

Tell your partner. It will be hard but you are doing yourself a favour of not having to live on pretence,fear and palpitating mind at the slightest chance of thinking your cover is blown. Hol up to your shits. You're a man. Mistakes happen. God be with you

First talk to God and apologies for your mistakes. Then Go talk to someone elderly, who knows both of you very well, one thing is for sure, you will lose a good girl, better to have a clear conscience and free mind, than living in lies and deceit.


As for the so called future baby Mama, talk to her in a more sorted ground, apologize for your reaction towards the whole issue, that any decision she takes, you are OK with it. I bet you she will reconsider her decision (manipulative mind). Less action, more common ground.

Peace

Fear of giving an ugly girl belle dey fear me o

Like seriously, who else doesn't bother to read this long episode

Konji na bastard

Jeffmonti:
This might turn out to be a lengthy read, please bear with me. The bashing and insults will be unnecessary as i have already told myself hurtful things a thousand times over.

So i am 29 and have a girlfriend who’s 25 we are both graduates; she’s a nurse and i am a practicing engineer and we’ve been dating for 3+ years now and preparations are underway to tie the knot this year God willing. Something happened last year, she suggested i move to a bigger apartment so that we can start buying household items and everything necessary to start a home as we are looking to get married soon which we did; i got a bigger place, met her parents she met mine. In a nutshell everything seems to be going well, we even started a business together and set to take on the future together before the devil struck (i take blames for my actions as i am not overly religious)

Around June last year, i met a girl (very fine girl) in the new area i moved to, although i have been seeing the girl around but one day as i was driving in i saw her hiding somewhere close to my compound avoiding the rain with her friends so i took them in until the rain subsided we exchanged contacts and started texting on WhatsApp a few days later. And soon after we started having sex (protected sex), prior to that time i never cheated on my girlfriend.
The sex continued, up to 2 times a week sometimes 3 as it was relatively easy as she lived very close and my girlfriend only visits on the weekend and never sleeps out (she’s from a very good and wealthy family with proper moral upbringing). Most evenings when return from work conji just do me one kind i don cross street other times she calls until we became comfortable having unprotected sex

So late October 2019 the new girl (I’ll call her Lola) texted me that’s she’s not feeling too well and i asked her to visit the hospital to run a test to know what to treat. She came back with a pregnancy test result proving she’s already 3 weeks pregnant, i was sure it was mine but i didn’t panic as she had a bf and i have my gf we were just for the sex at least that’s what we told each other.

So i asked her to remove the pregnancy, but got the shocker when she said she’s never going to remove the pregnancy that she’s 27 and have no desire to marry me or stay with me but she’s going to have the child. Omo my heart flipped. I begged her for like 3 weeks until she got mad and stopped taking my calls, she even moved away from her apartment. So i texted her and arranged a meeting, we sat down and discussed at length but she was still bent on keep it, i got furious and told her i am not ready to be part of the child’s life if she’s going through with it as i see no reason why she want to have my child when she know we are NEVER going to be together, that was when she said she had already told her family that i am not interested in the child and they support her to keep it and let the child bear their family name. I discussed the matter with two friends a boy and a girl and the asked me to let her have the child first.

One month passed fast forward to early December, Lola called 6 times i was so shook i couldn’t take her calls she texted that she’s ready to terminate the pregnancy since i am wicked and unconcerned she rained all manner of derogatory words but i was only concern with her decision to let go. I called and we agreed to meet the following day, I skipped work that day and met with her and her elder sister and elder sister’s friend. The sister and her friend were so mean but i was unmoved; i don already fuckup and ready to take anything to let it all go away because the knowledge of things will destroy my girlfriend.
So Lola entered my vehicle and we drove out, on our way to the hospital she for her to terminate the pregnancy plus treatment she’ll take afterwards and for the damages i have caused her she’s going to need 150k from me, i was furious and told her i don’t have that kind of money talk less of handing it over to her for something like this (i sure don’t know what i cost but i know it’s not up to 50k). She said if i don’t give her what she want she’s going to have the baby and that i should be thankful that she’s coming up with this that if she had listen to her friends advices she would have moved to my house with all sort of troubles (she was right) but i didn’t give in just yet. I dropped her off and ask her to have the child that am not going to give her the money as i don’t have it (I get the money sha).
So two days passed, she called again and after many arguments we agreed at 100k, made her to sign a NDA not to bother me again and all, I transferred her the 100k that night, she confirmed receipt and promised to go with it the following morning and that was the last I have heard or seen or her since then, until 3 weeks ago when another of her sister called from Canada and told asking if i am Me, that she’s been seeking my contact for a while now that Lola friend had to steal the number Lola’s phone and pass it to her as Lola has been hiding my phone number from the rest of the family and she doesn’t know the arrangement i have had with her but i should know that she’s having the child, she just thought i should know that i have a child somewhere when the baby eventually drops.
Knowing fully well that i am a shitty person to have done something terrible to myself and my girlfriend and all our future plans because of cheap sex, but I’ll be a more terribly bad person to have knowledge of a child somewhere and not be in his/her life. I called Lola but she didn’t take i texted her about her sisters call she called back to know who called and was furious, she ended the call (I guess to call her sister back) and called back again in about 20mins and asked me not to ever call her line again. I replied her text she should tell her family not call me as well. I have dodged to her apartment building a coupe times but she’s not been around for weeks as i was made to believe.
So i bought a ring to engage my girl few weeks ago but had to hold first to see how things play out, i can’t go ahead and marry my girlfriend with this kind of secret untold; that will be wickedness from the pit of hell and i still don’t know how to break it to her, it will destroy her.
I jokingly painted a similar scenery to my girlfriend; her response was: she will not marry me because if she does she will kill me in my sleep. That everybody is expecting us to get married this year, she now have high respect from her family because of me and this kind of thing happens both of us will die. Omo fear catch me.
Fellow Nairalanders, this is my predicament please advice a stupid brother. Insults are welcome as I hope to pick a thing or two from your comments. MODs please push this up biko.

Ok.

Mheen