₦airaland Forum

Somzee:
So because she's 33 years that means OP is settling for less?
Your reasoning is really laughable. I guess it's the average Nigerian men mentality.

@Op getting married to a younger woman doesn't guarantee happiness, you wear the shoe and knows how it fits. Think through it and know exactly what you want and go for it.

Marriage is like a wrapped gift, only after you've opened up would you know what's in the package, just pray to get married to a good and understanding woman while being a great man.

Yes because she's 33 and older than him, op is settling for less. And it is not the average Nigerian man mentality.

Yes getting married to a younger woman will not guarantee happiness and neither is getting married to an older woman. How can op get married to someone 2yrs older than him? How can she be submissive to him? There things that will happen, the woman will want to prove to him that she was 2yrs before he arrived into this world. You don't things like this and later blame devil or the woman if later she doesn't submit to him. Most times when you think you've picked the perfect shoe, you find out you will out grow it quickly. I agree with the next line and last paragraph.

FarFromAverage:
Brother you can't test somebody completely until you guys stay under the same roof for a long time.

You begin to accumulate more experience about life as you age, and gosh! . .
She knows how to play the game perfectly.

What exactly is your problem? Stop trying to put your insecurities in another man's mind. He knows her better than you.

lonikit:
i will be very brief with the narrative. i met the girl 2years ago when she was already 31. we started as friends but her character made me to fall in love and also had to leave my former young rude more educated and virgin gf (i love peace of mind).
without missing words, my new gf is the best compared to any other girl i have met. though, she is older than I by 2yrs but that is not my problem.
my problem now is that both of us are not really doing anything serious. she is managing in a private school. i have not gotten any job since i completed my service yr last year hence, managing in a school too.
considering our financial status, we are not ready for marriage now. we are hoping for better jobs.
please, i don't want to loose her and she is now 33. she is considering her chances of giving birth if she marries late like 35yrs bcus a doctor friend told her that women fertility has to do with their age, the older they bcom, the less they are fertile. please advice me on how to convince her. she is so unique.
please help a brother.

My only issue with this is if you are this worried about her age now, if you marry her and money starts pouring in, you might feel insecure about being married to an older woman when your new status can get you a younger lady.

You'll have to learn contentment.

A good woman deserves a man who will not think twice about asking her to marry him especially with what you said she has gone through.

I doubt you can take care of a family now plus there is the age factor.

Please, just let her go. Stop thinking about yourself for once and think about how delaying her will affect that. That's what you do when you love someone.

lonikit

Forget about how poor you are earning now. Prosperity has shown on many couples after their weddings.

You can start with a small room. A good job or jobs may eventually come your way or good business.

Put a ring on it. Wish you 2 the best

EVILFOREST:
All are the same.
It's better you get a very younger lady and tame her to the level you want.

At least, you are sure of her fertility chances and whoredom-like chances.
AGED LADIES would have experienced a lot of trauma, procedures, emotional torture, hatred and jealousy, of which if married will predispose you to UNTIMELY DEATH because of Vengeance.

lol..point noted

jagaban002:
Please don’t give her belle make money first my brother , don’t rush because u love her because d love will turn to hate when belle set in .

abi...lolz thanks.

Michellekabod2:
Some f00ls will spoil your mind about her because of her age. But bro,it is best you make mistake with your own hands than let the archaic opinions of people on a faceless forum destroy your life.
It will be pathetic if the opinions of random strangers you will never meet your entire life spoil your mind on someone you always see.

Is the money you earn and that she earns ample enough to live a moderate life or you are eyeing those living big life? Are you targeting a Bella naija type of posh wedding? How about you do u just dowry payment & traditional rites for now?

i am grateful sis. regarding ur question, we are both earning around 40k for now.

lonikit:
i will be very brief with the narrative. i met the girl 2years ago when she was already 31. we started as friends but her character made me to fall in love and also had to leave my former young rude more educated and virgin gf (i love peace of mind).
without missing words, my new gf is the best compared to any other girl i have met. though, she is older than I by 2yrs but that is not my problem.
my problem now is that both of us are not really doing anything serious. she is managing in a private school. i have not gotten any job since i completed my service yr last year hence, managing in a school too.
considering our financial status, we are not ready for marriage now. we are hoping for better jobs.
please, i don't want to loose her and she is now 33. she is considering her chances of giving birth if she marries late like 35yrs bcus a doctor friend told her that women fertility has to do with their age, the older they bcom, the less they are fertile. please advice me on how to convince her. she is so unique.
please help a brother.

She is not the best bro, she is only pretending to be the best because age is no longer on her side, if u doubt me, marry her, and come and give us update after 1yr



@iLegendd , @ubunja

Tony142:
She is not the best bro, she is only pretending to be the best because age is no longer on her side, if u doubt me, marry her, and come and give us update after 1yr



@iLegendd , @ubunja

She's the best but because she's aged.

doggedfighter:
Not even one meaningful advice on how to to better his situation and marry his heartthrob. Everything is centered on the girl's age as if the guy doesn't know her age already. He's made his choice already . Bunch of irrational mofos

abi my sis. as if aging is a crime. i know her age bfr i even started anytin with her and she knew mine too. age or beauty is never my consideration when. it comes to relationship. i look out for character. peace of mind is paramount

misreal:
Bros wife her oh. Nothing like a matures and understanding lady. Dating a young girl is stressful oh

i think u are right sir

ubunja:
She's the best but because she's aged.

Lol, exactly sir, she is looking for a Nice guy to settle down with

EVILFOREST:
She can't be the BEST.
She was just DISPLAYING those LOVELY antiques because AGE wasn't on her side.

The MOMENT she steps into your HOUSE legally, she will start TORMENTING you.
NOWADAYS LADIES don't fail in that regard.

PLEASE, leave her and focus on your career.
Better things LIE ahead.

i will focus on my career and i will not leave her cus of age too. she remains the best based on my experience.

EVILFOREST:
All are the same.
It's better you get a very younger lady and tame her to the level you want.

At least, you are sure of her fertility chances and whoredom-like chances.
AGED LADIES would have experienced a lot of trauma, procedures, emotional torture, hatred and jealousy, of which if married will predispose you to UNTIMELY DEATH because of Vengeance.

nothing like untimely death in my case. have u not seen or heard a younger wife killed her hubby. You are just being philosophical, no atom of fact.

oazeez1991:
Hmmmm! different strokes 4 different folks. Evri1 who has contributed previously ol got dia point.

In my own opinion, u already know wat u wanted, ol u want 4rm here is just a push up like a supportin system 2 backup ur stand. 4rm ur post, it is obvious u already plan or wish 2 marry d Lady in question, so it's ur choice. U don't need any1's approval here 2 mk ur decision stand.

If u go by ur own decision even if it's smtin u later regret in d long run which I don't pray u do, at least, d feelings dat u made d decision urself nd not sm1 influencing or forcing u 2, is enough.

My most concern is just d finance nd compatibility aspect. If d both of u cud brainstorm nd map out a plan 2geda nd den work towards it, den fine, but mk sure finance is tkin care of, nd don't 4get, delay also shud not tk long.

I was in similar situation as u, d decision I made myt not be wat u need as we are two different individual. Wat work 4 Mr. A might not work 4 Mr. B nd vise versa.

sincerely grateful sir.

Somzee:
So because she's 33 years that means OP is settling for less?
Your reasoning is really laughable. I guess it's the average Nigerian men mentality.

@Op getting married to a younger woman doesn't guarantee happiness, you wear the shoe and knows how it fits. Think through it and know exactly what you want and go for it.

Marriage is like a wrapped gift, only after you've opened up would you know what's in the package, just pray to get married to a good and understanding woman while being a great man.

thank you jare.

iamharkinwaley:
Bro, you had better listen to Farfromaverage, I once dated a lady like yours, She's 30, 5 years older than me. I thought she was the best woman, she kept pestering me to let us run away and start life somewhere. God so good I have to relocate for greener pastures and she began to show her true colours. Started exhibiting her true self.

What I'm trying to say is don't allow anyone rush you, you go into marriage when you know you're ready, know her so well like the back of your palm.

See how God made me dodge a bullet, I will be suffering now had it been I loop away with her....

i repeat, she is not rushing me

lonikit:
my brother, i wish to but scared of our present financial status. Thanks for your contribution.

Use your head, love is not enough to keep two people together

truthsayer009:
But you said & I quote "people who are wealthy enough to carter for her". I believe she isn't stupid & would have searched for people wealthy enough but couldn't find then she settled for him. It's like saying I should continue looking for "Chevron & Exxon mobil jobs" only when I have waited for 8 years with no job.

Look, my point remains not every woman would end up with a Rich dude, some will struggle. You women live in fairy tale lives far from reality.

I'm not even supporting him calling her aged, 33 is perfectly fine. But wealthier Men? Ah, she will sleep there o.

thank you sir

J111333:
Please don't do this, I hate to see kids suffer. Bring them only when you are ready for the responsibilities that follow even if it costs your relationship.

Good girls will always be there when you're ready but the sufferings of one kid may affect a generation.

Several Nigerian kids live below the poverty line, please don't add to that number I beg you.

i won't do that sir. thanks

eni4real:
You form this story... Talk true!!! Super story

my true life story sir.

Okoroawusa:
Bro marry her. There's nothing like peace of mind. I am a divorced man right now because I made the mistake of underrating a good thing when I had it. Now I don't even have time for marriage or should I say I don't feel like being married any more. But she will always be in my mind.

Once a woman decides to be with you there is nothing she can't endure with you. I am a man, a mature one at that... Marry her.

thank you sir. i have dated other ladies and i can tell u i understand the meaning of peace of mind since i met her.

alexmakaay:
your mumu no be China made..na original Belgium made.

instead of you to focus and help your "shaky life" and better yourself..you are preoccupied with helping a woman most above your age.

now, Mr lover boy.. if she's that good as you said, why is she still single??..or do you think it's only you Sabi better thing?? ohh you want to tell me she's the one made for you. i don't think so, otherwise her presence in your life should have bring financial growth to facilitate your marriage with her.

But seriously, brother don't allow emotion and ephemeral sentiments to becloud your sense of purpose in life.

sorry for those harsh words..but that's the truth and I mean it when I say it's from my heart.

leave her and face your life, the sooner you do this, the better for you and her. better thing no dey finish.

thank you for the abuses. thanks for ur own contribution

lonikit:
i am grateful sis. regarding ur question, we are both earning around 40k for now.

your location and the cost of living in that area matters. Can you stay in a self contain for a while? One in close proximity to your workplace to save transport fare?

Coolcalmcollect:
one time I've learnt in life, never be manipulated into marriage, never marry an older woman when you're broke, also never marry a girl above 30.

one thing i have learnt is marriage is personal, no special injunctions to make it perfect. that is why there are many books written and seminars organized on marriage and yet divorce is rising on daily basis. wht works for u may not work for others.

Onyi22:
@Opp I will advice that you follow ur heart, remember it's ur life and u r d one to live with her after the wedding,
Forget about getting any meaningful advice from this forum because some of the guys on this forum r buttered, frustrated n miserable..
Some r impotent n have watery sprem that can't produce anything....
If u really love her and she possess the character u want in a woman pls marry her and allow God to perfect his will concerning your marriage...
Remember, u can marry a girl of 23 and she will still have difficulty in child bearing, u may marry a Virgin, and she will not bear any child for u, it's all depends on God.
I wish u good luck

i am sincerely grateful for this.

AshiraWealthy:
What a way to reason. Change your mentality.
Is it not obvious that the same reasons this guy is giving now was the same reason that her unmarried till now? Mtchew..

Don't be against him tomorrow when he opens another thread on how brutal the wife is to him.

olabrinks:
That is it. My cousin was a virgin and she was 25 when she got married in 2015. But she is yet to conceive, I’m not using her situation to mock her. What I’m trying to say is this life no get formula. My mum had her first child at 33, honestly it’s not by age unless she is very close to menopause. It’s by the reproductive health of the woman and man. I just pray this man will open his eyes, sort out his finances and marry this lady. To get wife in this generation, it is not a small thing at all.

i also know a family friend who married as a virgin since 2014 and no issue till now. she is married to a medical doctor and she read medical related course in school too. i think if it is a medical condition, they should know.

i really understand your point ma. ur contributions are so helpful

FarFromAverage:
She's 33 and you like her character?
Brother run... You're joking with a green snake in a green grass. Though I'm not against you, but the thing is what stopped her from getting married when she was in her twenties?

you may be right though but some people are just unlucky

lonikit:
one thing i have learnt is marriage is personal, no special injunctions to make it perfect. that is why there are many books written and seminars organized on marriage and yet divorce is rising on daily basis. wht works for u may not work for others.

ask yourself do people read those books?
even marriage counselling people don't attend anymore, dey just feel omo we love each other let's hear word.... lol

zoeycherie:
olabrinks, I've been up since 12am reading your posts and I want to say that you're amazing.

You're just so positive and your posts are always so empathetic and encouraging. Reading your posts makes me really happy. If you're anything like your comments in real life, then I'll say your family is blessed to know someone like you.

Please don't ever change. I remain a big fan. Thank you.

she is very potent sound and active intellectually

lonikit:
i think u are right sir

my fiancee is a young girl.believe me, if not for the love i have for her eh.i would have left her...
Date a matured woman to avoid drama queen wahala oh