Ok - Romance (2)

Ok - Romance (2) - Nairaland

Nairaland Forum › Nairaland General › Romance › Ok (5545 Views)

Re: Ok by Charleys: 2:32pm On Apr 06, 2020

Millenniumlady:
How on earth she allow you play her up to this level is what i don't understand well i'm glad she's starting to think like a real lady and i think the best thing for her right now is to divorce you and move on cause no woman deserve to be in this terrible situation.....hope she finds love again from a REAL MAN

She has two kids, how does she find love again?

Re: Ok by Charleys: 2:38pm On Apr 06, 2020

luwiizy:
Free that wife of yours for a long time....

If you keep putting pressure on her to come back she will come back putting much more pressure on you....

Brother be wise, the book of proverb spoke alot about things like this..

You saw all this beforehand and you chose to go ahead...

You are soft from the heart no doubt..

Men like you makes these world a better place..
Always believing they can manage the unmanageable

Did you read the part he said he's squatting with someone?

Na fVck dey hungry the boy.

Re: Ok by terrezo2002(m): 2:41pm On Apr 06, 2020

southniyikaye:
8 years, 8 solid years of sacrificing my effort, support, care was shattered in just few minutes.
Got her as my girlfriend in 2012 and we got married in 2016.
Have been the one taking care of both of us since then, worked, and sacrificed my all. Almost died because of her 4times not gonna go into details.
She was arrogant, stubborn and disrespectful but I was able to keep those attitudes in check.
We go two kids together and have been doing my best as a man, they never lack anything. But last year things got worst and she have to go stay with her parents this year Feb while I aquat somewhere trying to get my life together and start all over.
Am this type of person that put people above me, I put even strangers needs above mine, am 300% soft and take things to heart, a confirmed simp like ubunja will call it.(I wish the redpill will actually be a tablet to swallow) cos all I read couldn't help me cos I take things to heart too much, have taken this relationship to the heart.
The fact that I gat kids and a understanding wife still kept me going not minding the financial problems I have cos I believe one day things will change for the better.
I don't have friends, right from sec sch days, that's how have been, 1 man squad have been my thing. I can stay indoor for years without going out, I am not gonna feel it a bit. Enough of the stort(but just letting you know the type of person I was.)
2days ago so I was chatting my wife and telling her things gonna be okay soon that I am hopeful and I want us to restrrategise and plan for our future and that of our kids, I said a lot of of things that can shape our future but I was wounded by the answer she gave me like
WHATEVER SUIT YOU
tried to make her smile
And she was like, any problems?
Her answers, her attitude, her behavior was so cold to me, like someone who was already tired but just don't know how to say it.
I know she always want to live a flashy life, a life without stress, worries and pain.
Believe me, I can vouch for her, she is not promiscuous, but the way she spoke was like she already found an alternative or someone was already talking to her and she is almost convinced or sort of.
Have been shattered since then and I just feel like I was gonna have an attack. It really hit me so hard.
Maybe if I had been a bad boy from inception, It won't affect me this much. I can't just think straight, high BP, couldn't eat.
Pls guys advice me am going insane sincerely.
Eight good years and I can swear on my life, I have never cheated not even flirt cos I find it extremely difficult to cheat.

Cc ubunja

And yes I spent almost 10hours going through all ubunja's topics, tried to form the hard guy and just wave everything off and move on and pretend like it never happened but I can't.
Wish REDPILL WAS ACTUALLY A TABLET I COULD USE.

Cc rocktation
Cc farano

She has since stopped replying my messages and chatting me
And I always see her online

What needless pains we bear all because we didn't take it to God in prayers. God watches over his people and makes sure that their needs are meant. I hope you understand this

Re: Ok by Mekenz(m): 2:48pm On Apr 06, 2020

I keep telling intended couples not to be blind to red flags that arises during the course of their courtship, any flag that doesn't suit you or you can't wave aside without nagging about it, should be cross-check very well before saying I do. Human beings hardly drop or changes their characters. You noticed all these her actitude, instead of weighing your options, you're been blinded by love, which is not enough as you can see.

Anyways the deed has been done, trust you're navigating through another phase of your life,and these your wife behaviour should serving it purpose to your relationship, try and use these medium to rediscover yourself, it's just a bend not the end of your life, get up dust yourself, go out there and find something to do with your life, relegate her to the background for now, till you're able to get your shits together.

At these point of your life, you don't actually need your wife pity, just be in contact with your kids, forget about her, I don't say you should disdain her noo... trust me she will love you and come back to her senses when things turn around.

3 Likes

Re: Ok by oazeez1991(m): 2:48pm On Apr 06, 2020

Dis is just anoda experience backin up d fact dat, marriage cud hardly be sustain without strong financial backup.

I feel 4 u Op, ur ego nd dignity as a man has been snatched away 4rm u. D situation 4rm ur narration is kind of traumatic. Kids are even involve.

U can't really blame her as women r like frog, dey olwez wanted a soft landing. Just work on hw 2 gather sm financial strength, let her be 4 now nd work on hw 2 tk care of dose children. She's as traumatic as u r too.

Ur family nd hers r also needed in dis trying times. Meet up wif her in person nd assure her tinz wud get better. If she has not been working or has no skill, encourage her 2 engage in eida of it.

But, ol in ol, while u r hopin 4 d best, also mk sure 2 prepare 4 d worst.

May God help u.

Re: Ok by Alexun(m): 3:04pm On Apr 06, 2020

It's really sad you have to go through all of these! I'm not married, but I totally understood your submissions. Let me remind you that you have face worse rejections than this. The times you look around but you can't point to a friend. Now, I know you having this wife as your friend, confidant and family, all-in-one, and this happening can be soul-wrenching.

But brother, you will survive this time again. You have to take your heart from still believing she is who she used to be to you. But then, you have to reach out, you know why? Cause of children. Make sure you do more of phone calls, and each time, ensure your conversations are with your children after exchanging pleasantries. Don't fret about her, so as not to be discouraged in your pursuit of happiness.

All things will fall into place, it's just a matter of TIME!!!

STAY SAFE AND KEEP YOUR SANITY, BROTHER

2 Likes

Re: Ok by Lamanii22(f): 3:12pm On Apr 06, 2020

She simply got tired of everything... It's not her fault... Just stay strong alright? Just work harder... Do it for your kids... It's not all women that has the strength for hardship..

Re: Ok by Millenniumlady(f): 3:21pm On Apr 06, 2020

realokopi:
You're trying as much as possible to show the world that you are stupid and brainless but nobody is paying attention cos we have enough lunatics in the world already.

Soldier aren't you suppose to be in a battlefield ? What are you doing in on a public forum like this ?

Re: Ok by Nobody: 3:28pm On Apr 06, 2020

You think I am dumb as you are, right?

Millenniumlady:
Soldier aren't you suppose to be in a battlefield ? What are you doing in on a public forum like this ?

Re: Ok by barclosky4: 3:38pm On Apr 06, 2020

nwaimoroseyaho:
Go to her and have a heart to heart talk.
It's too early to conclude that she has abandoned you.
She is not happy with your situation but her reaction is wrong dats all.

thats just it

Re: Ok by barclosky4: 3:42pm On Apr 06, 2020

Alexun:
It's really sad you have to go through all of these! I'm not married, but I totally understood your submissions. Let me remind you that you have face worse rejections than this. The times you look around but you can't point to a friend. Now, I know you having this wife as your friend, confidant and family, all-in-one, and this happening can be soul-wrenching.

But brother, you will survive this time again. You have to take your heart from still believing she is who she used to be to you. But then, you have to reach out, you know why? Cause of children. Make sure you do more of phone calls, and each time, ensure your conversations are with your children after exchanging pleasantries. Don't fret about her, so as not to be discouraged in your pursuit of happiness.

All things will fall into place, it's just a matter of TIME!!!

STAY SAFE AND KEEP YOUR SANITY, BROTHER

God bless you, for this advice, all what some people know is to criticize, without knowing what the person is facing, this life er

1 Like

Re: Ok by SmellingAnus(m): 3:57pm On Apr 06, 2020

There are two things that can't live together in the same house with a man...
They are poverty and a beautiful woman...
One must eventually leave for the other to remain....

Take heart bro... May God give you the fortitude to bear this loss...

1 Like

Re: Ok by Shormiey(m): 4:11pm On Apr 06, 2020

Millenniumlady:
How on earth she allow you play her up to this level is what i don't understand well i'm glad she's starting to think like a real lady and i think the best thing for her right now is to divorce you and move on cause no woman deserve to be in this terrible situation.....hope she finds love again from a REAL MAN

I will chop ban if I reply you... shocked

1 Like

Re: Ok by Nobody: 4:22pm On Apr 06, 2020

Women don't like to listen to plans over and over so keep the plans to yourself and tell her more of outcomes.

She should be staying in her husband's house and not her parent's. Bro, your wife is simply frustrated just like you are now so don't take it personal.

If she hasn't cheated on you in the past 8years then chances of cheating on you now is low so remove that from your mind at the moment and hustle hard.

1 Like

Re: Ok by Nobody: 4:31pm On Apr 06, 2020

Charleys:
G get out from here with all these name dropping.

So because she said suit yourself, you come dey look for who go support your thread.

You haven't told us if she cheated on you.

She's also taking the pressure just like you.

Do you know what it means for a married lady to go back to her parents house with kids, while you walk free.

You couldn't put your house in order.
That's why you're in this mess.

Let me give you a secret.

She doesn't want to hear your stupid stories, just make things work out

are you married?
You talked as if being jobless is a choice I had onsoto make.
Bro, I wasn't lazy, I said 8years and you should know for those eight years, I single handedly sponsor and did everything doable, give me some credit man.
I didn't want to delve seriously into the matter.

1 Like

Re: Ok by Nobody: 4:34pm On Apr 06, 2020

Millenniumlady:
How on earth she allow you play her up to this level is what i don't understand well i'm glad she's starting to think like a real lady and i think the best thing for her right now is to divorce you and move on cause no woman deserve to be in this terrible situation.....hope she finds love again from a REAL MAN

women, hmmm, you will never find anything wrong with your likes.
Maybe I will update this thread and tell the whole story, I only said few cos I don't want to paint her in bad lighr

1 Like

Re: Ok by Nobody: 4:34pm On Apr 06, 2020

Harshreality:
Never ignore red flags
And also, why isn't she working?
Especially now that things aren't Rosy?

she is working now, I think that's where she got exposed

Re: Ok by Nobody: 4:43pm On Apr 06, 2020

nitoriolohun:
Sorry bro for the pain.

you have done literally nothing wrong to love your woman n family so much that you provided for them so well when things was going well for you. As a matter of fact u obeyed God's word.

Without mincing words for you, you failed to realise that love is never enough to marry. Before settling for a partner think about her economic advantage. Her arrogance, disrespect n stubborness was there when u dated her for two years but because you thought u were either in love or believed she will change or u can endure.

See bro ! marriage is partnership n you should not feel bad when u can't carry on with the family responsibilities but yes you ought to feel concerned as a man of honour but u married a woman who has never invested in the marriage so she can choose to act anyway because she feels you will be the looser. The Bible says two are better than one so when one falls the other will help the other to stand.

You married a woman who might have asked you countless of times can u take care of me ? a question I detest so much been asked. what is the meaning of she dont want pain she dnt want stress, she wants to live a flashy life style, bro at whose expense ? A woman of economic advantage thinks above all dos bull craps.

The deed is done and won't tell you your wife is bad or you shld not fight for her but this is an eye opener. The people u really deserve are the ones that are there when you are in crises. Available for you physically,emotionally n surportive.

most women who are flashy are like cancers. Job in the Bible can relate better. They tends to be angels n caring when things are fine but demons n psychopath when things go wrong.

uncle my advise for you tho am not married but am a high chief bachelor so u can decide wat to make of my advice. Women tends to get power when you beg them in such situation they see u as a weakling 1.dnt beg her just explain things to her. 2. pray to God for direction n restoration 3. work on your emotions n see her as non existing.4. still keep giving the little u have for your children. 5. if you are a christain and you belong to a church try see your pastor n seek counsel n help.

las las if God willing your wife will come back to her senses n know her role in the marriage is to be a help meet n not a liability. she will step up her game and be responsible too but if otherwise bro you know what to do and if you dnt know lemme help u with the golden rule . YOURSELF FIRST. shalom !!!

bro I really appreciate this.
Well am trying to work on. Myself and ubunja mentioned a book, THE MANIPULATED MAN, I just finished. Reading it and it eased my emotions 70%
Sincerely she isn't the materialistic type but who no like better thing?
What I expected was, someone who doesn't default in 8 years deserves some sympathy.
I was scammed of Canada travel and it was her brother who introduced the agent and sincerely I let go. Of everything, there is less you can do when it comes to in-laws and sincerely the brother was innocent, when I say he was innocent, I know what am saying

Re: Ok by Zeal0000007(m): 4:44pm On Apr 06, 2020

southniyikaye:
8 years, 8 solid years of sacrificing my effort, support, care was shattered in just few minutes.
Got her as my girlfriend in 2012 and we got married in 2016.
Have been the one taking care of both of us since then, worked, and sacrificed my all. Almost died because of her 4times not gonna go into details.
She was arrogant, stubborn and disrespectful but I was able to keep those attitudes in check.
We go two kids together and have been doing my best as a man, they never lack anything. But last year things got worst and she have to go stay with her parents this year Feb while I aquat somewhere trying to get my life together and start all over.
Am this type of person that put people above me, I put even strangers needs above mine, am 300% soft and take things to heart, a confirmed simp like ubunja will call it.(I wish the redpill will actually be a tablet to swallow) cos all I read couldn't help me cos I take things to heart too much, have taken this relationship to the heart.
The fact that I gat kids and a understanding wife still kept me going not minding the financial problems I have cos I believe one day things will change for the better.
I don't have friends, right from sec sch days, that's how have been, 1 man squad have been my thing. I can stay indoor for years without going out, I am not gonna feel it a bit. Enough of the stort(but just letting you know the type of person I was.)
2days ago so I was chatting my wife and telling her things gonna be okay soon that I am hopeful and I want us to restrrategise and plan for our future and that of our kids, I said a lot of of things that can shape our future but I was wounded by the answer she gave me like
WHATEVER SUIT YOU
tried to make her smile
And she was like, any problems?
Her answers, her attitude, her behavior was so cold to me, like someone who was already tired but just don't know how to say it.
I know she always want to live a flashy life, a life without stress, worries and pain.
Believe me, I can vouch for her, she is not promiscuous, but the way she spoke was like she already found an alternative or someone was already talking to her and she is almost convinced or sort of.
Have been shattered since then and I just feel like Ie was gonna have an attack. It really hit me so hard.
Maybe if I had been a bad boy from inception, It won't affect me this much. I can't just think straight, high BP, couldn't eat.
Pls guys advice me am going insane sincerely.
Eight good years and I can swear on my life, I have never cheated not even flirt cos I find it extremely difficult to cheat.

Cc ubunja

And yes I spent almost 10hours going through all ubunja's topics, tried to form the hard guy and just wave everything off and move on and pretend like ita never happened but I can't.
Wish REDPILL WAS ACTUALLY A TABLET I COULD USE.

Cc rocktati
Cc farano

She has since stopped replying my messages and chatting me
And I always see her online

Brother I feel ur pains, ur mistake is that you ignored all those signs when you were dating her, I'm currently dating someone like that. she gets angry easily, sometimes she could be disrespectful, but she's very supportive ,she backs me up allot and I love her alot, but because of her lack of manners and respect irrespective of my love for her I can't settle for a woman like that. right now I'm thinking about settling her and moving on if she doesn't change for good . I don't wanna make mistake of others, so my advice for you just man up when ever you talking to her. set the rules for her to abide, don't be soft, make her make understand that you guys need to put heads together and work things out for the future, else u might leave her. and believe me she will be at d disadvantage just wish u luck, u don't need all this u deserve better and there better women out there. u need to be happy man.

1 Like

Re: Ok by Nobody: 4:48pm On Apr 06, 2020

Charleys:
Did you read the part he said he's squatting with someone?

Na fVck dey hungry the boy.

lol this your own reasoning na die o, Bleep ke? Lol bro am just heartbroken ni jaree,

Re: Ok by Brunicekid(m): 4:49pm On Apr 06, 2020

You won't go insane in Jesus Mighty Name.

Re: Ok by Millenniumlady(f): 4:50pm On Apr 06, 2020

realokopi:
You think I am dumb as you are, right?

Awww go and drink cold water i know I've hurt your feelings cheesy

Re: Ok by Nobody: 4:53pm On Apr 06, 2020

Millenniumlady:
How on earth she allow you play her up to this level is what i don't understand well i'm glad she's starting to think like a real lady and i think the best thing for her right now is to divorce you and move on cause no woman deserve to be in this terrible situation.....hope she finds love again from a REAL MAN

Re: Ok by Nobody: 4:55pm On Apr 06, 2020

See wetin poverty dey do marriages in Nigeria.

And over 70% of homes are like this.

Re: Ok by Nobody: 4:56pm On Apr 06, 2020

Seems like you're obsessed with me, right?
Are you in love with me?? Say it out and stop being weird

Millenniumlady:
Awww go and drink cold water i know I've hurt your feelings

Re: Ok by SweetCunt97(f): 4:59pm On Apr 06, 2020

southniyikaye:
lol this your own reasoning na die o, Bleep ke? Lol bro am just heartbroken ni jaree,

So you stopped her from working so as not to get exposed? Lol, male oppression at work

Re: Ok by joshboo(m): 5:06pm On Apr 06, 2020

Millenniumlady:
How on earth she allow you play her up to this level is what i don't understand well i'm glad she's starting to think like a real lady and i think the best thing for her right now is to divorce you and move on cause no woman deserve to be in this terrible situation.....hope she finds love again from a REAL MAN

Are you this stupid on a norms or the isolation ish is making you sound like one??

Re: Ok by edoman2016: 5:15pm On Apr 06, 2020

southniyikaye:
8 years, 8 solid years of sacrificing my effort, support, care was shattered in just few minutes.
Got her as my girlfriend in 2012 and we got married in 2016.
Have been the one taking care of both of us since then, worked, and sacrificed my all. Almost died because of her 4times not gonna go into details.
She was arrogant, stubborn and disrespectful but I was able to keep those attitudes in check.
We go two kids together and have been doing my best as a man, they never lack anything. But last year things got worst and she have to go stay with her parents this year Feb while I aquat somewhere trying to get my life together and start all over.
Am this type of person that put people above me, I put even strangers needs above mine, am 300% soft and take things to heart, a confirmed simp like ubunja will call it.(I wish the redpill will actually be a tablet to swallow) cos all I read couldn't help me cos I take things to heart too much, have taken this relationship to the heart.
The fact that I gat kids and a understanding wife still kept me going not minding the financial problems I have cos I believe one day things will change for the better.
I don't have friends, right from sec sch days, that's how have been, 1 man squad have been my thing. I can stay indoor for years without going out, I am not gonna feel it a bit. Enough of the stort(but just letting you know the type of person I was.)
2days ago so I was chatting my wife and telling her things gonna be okay soon that I am hopeful and I want us to restrrategise and plan for our future and that of our kids, I said a lot of of things that can shape our future but I was wounded by the answer she gave me like
WHATEVER SUIT YOU
tried to make her smile
And she was like, any problems?
Her answers, her attitude, her behavior was so cold to me, like someone who was already tired but just don't know how to say it.
I know she always want to live a flashy life, a life without stress, worries and pain.
Believe me, I can vouch for her, she is not promiscuous, but the way she spoke was like she already found an alternative or someone was already talking to her and she is almost convinced or sort of.
Have been shattered since then and I just feel like I was gonna have an attack. It really hit me so hard.
Maybe if I had been a bad boy from inception, It won't affect me this much. I can't just think straight, high BP, couldn't eat.
Pls guys advice me am going insane sincerely.
Eight good years and I can swear on my life, I have never cheated not even flirt cos I find it extremely difficult to cheat.

Cc ubunja

And yes I spent almost 10hours going through all ubunja's topics, tried to form the hard guy and just wave everything off and move on and pretend like it never happened but I can't.
Wish REDPILL WAS ACTUALLY A TABLET I COULD USE.

Cc rocktation
Cc farano

She has since stopped replying my messages and chatting me
And I always see her online

I thought you have a job as a site manager. Don't you get paid? You should save up and rent an apartment.

Re: Ok by Nobody: 5:19pm On Apr 06, 2020

edoman2016:
I thought you have a job as a site manager. Don't you get paid? You should save up and rent an apartment.

this is someone who knows me personally or you read my thread?
I left being a site manager many years ago to establish my own business and it was successful until last year

Re: Ok by Angelacruz: 5:30pm On Apr 06, 2020

Was ur wife not working all dis yrs??she would ve supported u in dis trying tym.Or she was a house wife?.U cant be doing all d spending all by ur self.Too bad!

Re: Ok by Nobody: 5:44pm On Apr 06, 2020

So sad. I pray the Lord comforts you. Previous comments have pointed out the problem. You knew she had penchant for flashy lifestyle and still proceeded to marry her.
Though everybody likes good thing, we only exercise self control which I think your wife lacks.

Re: Ok by Nobody: 5:48pm On Apr 06, 2020

LOL ereduwa where you at?
We should be derailing threads like this..

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