₦airaland Forum

Lekan239:
My parents got married 27years ago, since then it has been hell for my mom. It's as if my mom was forced on him or did the love just seize to exit, this I need advice on, from my brothers and sisters here on what to do next.

It all began in 1993, two years later I was born (1995), then we reside in Lagos but my dad later moved to pH in search of greener pastures. He only comes back home (Lagos) once in a while. My mom tried all her best to cater for her kids during all those period with no help or whatsoever coming from my Dad. It wasn't easy at all.

Fast forward to early 2003, my dad came visiting after two years without hearing from him and then my mom decided we are going with him to pH, he opposed but my mom Insisted. To cut the long story short, after we get to pH we found out my dad was living carelessly, womanizing, his social life is zero because he doesn't drink or smoke but he lavished all his money outside and Care less about his family.

My mom strived and engaged in little business which we managed to survive on. My dad only comes home when he is Short of money and acted low and submissive but as soon as he got some money, he changed immediately.

So 2010 I left pH to the village, was writing waec, looking for admission and so on, later going to lag to hustle around 2013 as I'm the one to foot my education expenses.

2015 I gained admission in a polytechnic, after my OND in 2017 I went back to lag to begin the hustle as I have to further my education, all this period I did not visit my family in Port Harcourt. I went back for HND in 2018 but had to withdraw because of lack of funds, I went back again in 2019 because a family member advised he will foot the bills which he later didn't do.

So because of this covid 19 I visited my parents in pH. My mom was very ill, she can't move nor stand and she has been the one taking care of the family, my father inclusive. My father has been a lazy man who depends solely on his wife for survival. He does not work, he does not stay at home with his sick wife. 6am he will enter the kitchen and eat any food he finds he won't even ask if four of his kids and my mom will eat. He will go and sit down in people's shops around the streets discussing with people's wife's. 10am he will be back home, straight to the kitchen to check if there's any food if my mom had drop money for us to prepare food, he will eat it without even talking to anybody, in fact he owns the kitchen now. He repeats same 2pm, 5pm and night meal also. I'm just so angry right now I don't even know what I am typing again.

After seeing all this behavior i advised my mother to give him some space, she gave birth to four children for him and three of us can survive on our own as we are no longer kids, but she won't obliged it's just as if maybe she is okay with suffering.

Today this morning, my dad did the most outrageous thing, he woke up and started ranting, saying does my mom think he is not going to be rich later, and he won't stay here forever. I got the message he was passing that he is going to leave my Mom if he stumbles upon some money. And I exactly told my mom this statement yesternight too.

Please you guys should advise me on what to do because at this junction, it hurts me a lot having the knowledge that my mom is with man who doesnt care or love her, even at her sick bed, he never for once visited the doctor nor the man of God taking care of my Mom.

Lekan239:
09034769453, thanks

Lekan239:
09034769453, thanks

Akinsoladwayne:
And I cried bro!!!


God will definitely see you through . Just don't give up the fight,and I want you to know something that a pay day will surely come.
My regards to your Mum

bolaji3071:
Your story is similar to mine. But in my own case my dad didn't come back home, but he went to the village to marry another woman.

Me and my siblings were left with my mum alone who is a trader to cater for us.

Later when my dad became sick, the woman left him. And the sickness got worsenend that they had to rush him to UCH ibadan.

It was one fateful morning of August 6, 2016 that I got a call from the village that my dad has been rushed to UCH.

And it was that same day I was preparing to upload my my documents for my school admission.

So I had to travel down to UCH from lagos that same day to stay with him at the hospital, being his first born.

We stayed there for 40 days and also he was operated on(below knee amputation).

So after the surgical injury became a little bit ok. We went for physiotherapy to learn how, so he can learn how to use clutches to walk.

So, after that he got discharged and we went back to the village.

That year, after the uploading of documents, I gained admission to study in Unilag, and around November we were asked to come to school for the physical screening.

On getting to school after my screening, I got a call that my dad has died. Mehn that was the worst day of my life.

I traveled back to oyo state that same evening. It was a very sad and bad experience for me. Despite how he was not there for me, my siblings and mum, I would never wish for him to die.

My dad's junior bro who promised then to sponsor me in school didn't come through, I have been hustling my way through during holidays with work ranging from bet9ja cashier, office assistant and all to cater for my school needs, siblings and mum,but 300level second semester was the most difficult for me.

I could not get any job to save up for 400level school fees after the holiday. Had to sell of my phone then to pay up my school fees, now in 400level. It has not been easy, but I know my story will change for good soon and I will give my mum and siblings a very better life.

I perfectly relate with all you are going through op.

bolaji3071:
Your
I could not get any job to save up for 400level school fees after the holiday. Had to sell of my phone then to pay up my school fees, now in 400level. It has not been easy, but I know my story will change for good soon and I will give my mum and siblings a very better life.

I perfectly relate with all you are going through op.

LagosismyHome:
Sent you a PM

Roman7:
Man, everywhere go good Las Las......may God just favour all struggling youths.

bolaji3071:
Good morning ma, I don't have access to the mail attached to the account anymore, you can reach me on akanbigraphix@gmail.com

Thank you ma.

LagosismyHome:
Email sent

Digmygold:
I.am.not your father who.married your loose mother whom you refer to as a hag hoe. I am.HAPPILY married to a virtuous woman, you are married to a poo stained didlo and your dark gay porn movies are your kids sicko. I understand your pain. You are going to remain in stagnation and that self induced depression will continue until you die, wailing broke ass redpiller.

Digmygold:
.

You run your race with hookers because you never see past the pvssy. All you do when you meet a woman is fantacise on how to hump.and dump. That choice however marked your ruin.

Thats the huge difference between the intelligent successful simp and an unsuccessful broke redpiller. You see pvssy, we see value and we never let go of a rare gem when we hitch one.

In your miseduGayshiit all you wrote with your millions of dumb words since you are jobless was nothing but a repitition of "all women are hoes and gold diggers" including your hoe mother as well as Dangotes daighters. You made absolutely no sense and all simps could see was an angry, depressed and dejected old pig dying in self induced agony.

We saw one who had a messy past and present. A fool who rather than look inwards decides to come on a faceless forum to vent his frustration and preach violence against women who have gotten their bites back at you via Karma.

Go.and die in your penury. We did not instruct you to live the cougar chaser life and end up a bankrupt wailing redpiller..

BluntTheApostle:
First of all, have you ever sat your father down and asked for his own side of the story?

I take it that you are a man. Why not have a man to man chat with your father.

Men have pains too. What was the past like between your father and your mother before they got married and started having children?

Was your mother the unbearable one at that time? Did she subject your father to untold misery?

Let me give you an instance. There was a man who lost his job. He and his wife were just starting their lives. In fact, they had not been married for long. The house became a hell to the man. To make matters worse, there was a time the wife directed the man to not visit his ailing mother in the village. She was the one paying the rent, and would pay the transport fare. The husband's mother died. He was her only son. Now, no matter what, whether you are a man or a woman, the most powerful person in a relationship is the one with the financial power. Some men may take this for granted and treat their woman well. But it would be hard to get a woman with the financial power who is nice to her husband.

Anyway, things have changed for the man in my story. He and his wife are living fine now, only after counseling. Because the man paid her back in her coins until she almost lost her life.

So, sit your dad down and ask why. He might be acting based on accumulated grievances against your mother. You children may not know this because you are blinded by that natural bond between mother and child.

But remember that your father is a human being too. And except he is a bastard, he can't be acting without reasons.

Moreover, your mother may not be painting the true picture to you people.

You, as a man, can't afford to jump into conclusion. You will marry too one day. If you jump into conclusion and take your mother away without trying to get to the root of the problem, you may come to learn the hard way should it ever happen to you too.

liquidfaya:
see how angry you are. Lmfao. Say what you want about ubunja. You cant change his life. But his writeups did fvckup your marriage.

And for three years you have been angry at him.

No more happiness for you. Dude.

The Miseducations stole your happiness ha ha ha


Reject

Dustin baby of the Year.

BluntTheApostle:
I only advised him not to take sides? He is better off being an unbiased umpire in this case. No matter how he sees it, it is his mother's marriage, not his. There are ways you dabble into other people's marriages, even if they are your parents. You have to be unbiased. You have to listen to both sides. The OP himself confessed that the problem began even before he was born. It would pay him to dig deeper rather than jumping into conclusion. Hopefully, his own children will not jump into conclusion against him in the future.

Moreover, how carefully he handles this would help him grow into a better man than his father. Listening to his father, seeing where everything went wrong, and how his father contributed to the mess would make him avoid such mistakes when he himself gets married.

liquidfaya:
lol I know you regret coming across Ubunja's Miseducations lol. They're so painful aren't they lol. Especially when they make you realise your life is one big scam.

Lmfao.

Don't hate the Messenger. Hate that ho who scammed you.


Reject

Brightgem:
So painful to read. Your father is on his way to hell, that's what happens to a man that won't take care of those entrusted to him.

Hustle hard so that you mother atleast has something worth being called a life.

izzou:
[color=royalblue]If you, or any of your siblings have a place of their own, just jejely carry your mother and leave that place

[/color]

Relationshipish:
Nice talk bro.. very nice..
But the question is (God forbid) what if this woman dies like this what do you think would happen next?
Destiny wasted, lekan239 might leave the rest of his life hating his father worst than the little dislike he has right now. His siblings too?

For me, it's better to leave and be alive first then pray from outside. Save your life first then you can save others'

Lekan239:
My parents got married 27years ago, since then it has been hell for my mom. It's as if my mom was forced on him or did the love just seize to exit, this I need advice on, from my brothers and sisters here on what to do next.

It all began in 1993, two years later I was born (1995), then we reside in Lagos but my dad later moved to pH in search of greener pastures. He only comes back home (Lagos) once in a while. My mom tried all her best to cater for her kids during all those period with no help or whatsoever coming from my Dad. It wasn't easy at all.

Fast forward to early 2003, my dad came visiting after two years without hearing from him and then my mom decided we are going with him to pH, he opposed but my mom Insisted. To cut the long story short, after we get to pH we found out my dad was living carelessly, womanizing, his social life is zero because he doesn't drink or smoke but he lavished all his money outside and Care less about his family.

My mom strived and engaged in little business which we managed to survive on. My dad only comes home when he is Short of money and acted low and submissive but as soon as he got some money, he changed immediately.

So 2010 I left pH to the village, was writing waec, looking for admission and so on, later going to lag to hustle around 2013 as I'm the one to foot my education expenses.

2015 I gained admission in a polytechnic, after my OND in 2017 I went back to lag to begin the hustle as I have to further my education, all this period I did not visit my family in Port Harcourt. I went back for HND in 2018 but had to withdraw because of lack of funds, I went back again in 2019 because a family member advised he will foot the bills which he later didn't do.

So because of this covid 19 I visited my parents in pH. My mom was very ill, she can't move nor stand and she has been the one taking care of the family, my father inclusive. My father has been a lazy man who depends solely on his wife for survival. He does not work, he does not stay at home with his sick wife. 6am he will enter the kitchen and eat any food he finds he won't even ask if four of his kids and my mom will eat. He will go and sit down in people's shops around the streets discussing with people's wife's. 10am he will be back home, straight to the kitchen to check if there's any food if my mom had drop money for us to prepare food, he will eat it without even talking to anybody, in fact he owns the kitchen now. He repeats same 2pm, 5pm and night meal also. I'm just so angry right now I don't even know what I am typing again.

After seeing all this behavior i advised my mother to give him some space, she gave birth to four children for him and three of us can survive on our own as we are no longer kids, but she won't obliged it's just as if maybe she is okay with suffering.

Today this morning, my dad did the most outrageous thing, he woke up and started ranting, saying does my mom think he is not going to be rich later, and he won't stay here forever. I got the message he was passing that he is going to leave my Mom if he stumbles upon some money. And I exactly told my mom this statement yesternight too.

Please you guys should advise me on what to do because at this junction, it hurts me a lot having the knowledge that my mom is with man who doesnt care or love her, even at her sick bed, he never for once visited the doctor nor the man of God taking care of my Mom.

Lekan239:
My parents got married 27years ago, since then it has been hell for my mom. It's as if my mom was forced on him or did the love just seize to exit, this I need advice on, from my brothers and sisters here on what to do next.

It all began in 1993, two years later I was born (1995), then we reside in Lagos but my dad later moved to pH in search of greener pastures. He only comes back home (Lagos) once in a while. My mom tried all her best to cater for her kids during all those period with no help or whatsoever coming from my Dad. It wasn't easy at all.

Fast forward to early 2003, my dad came visiting after two years without hearing from him and then my mom decided we are going with him to pH, he opposed but my mom Insisted. To cut the long story short, after we get to pH we found out my dad was living carelessly, womanizing, his social life is zero because he doesn't drink or smoke but he lavished all his money outside and Care less about his family.

My mom strived and engaged in little business which we managed to survive on. My dad only comes home when he is Short of money and acted low and submissive but as soon as he got some money, he changed immediately.

So 2010 I left pH to the village, was writing waec, looking for admission and so on, later going to lag to hustle around 2013 as I'm the one to foot my education expenses.

2015 I gained admission in a polytechnic, after my OND in 2017 I went back to lag to begin the hustle as I have to further my education, all this period I did not visit my family in Port Harcourt. I went back for HND in 2018 but had to withdraw because of lack of funds, I went back again in 2019 because a family member advised he will foot the bills which he later didn't do.

So because of this covid 19 I visited my parents in pH. My mom was very ill, she can't move nor stand and she has been the one taking care of the family, my father inclusive. My father has been a lazy man who depends solely on his wife for survival. He does not work, he does not stay at home with his sick wife. 6am he will enter the kitchen and eat any food he finds he won't even ask if four of his kids and my mom will eat. He will go and sit down in people's shops around the streets discussing with people's wife's. 10am he will be back home, straight to the kitchen to check if there's any food if my mom had drop money for us to prepare food, he will eat it without even talking to anybody, in fact he owns the kitchen now. He repeats same 2pm, 5pm and night meal also. I'm just so angry right now I don't even know what I am typing again.

After seeing all this behavior i advised my mother to give him some space, she gave birth to four children for him and three of us can survive on our own as we are no longer kids, but she won't obliged it's just as if maybe she is okay with suffering.

Today this morning, my dad did the most outrageous thing, he woke up and started ranting, saying does my mom think he is not going to be rich later, and he won't stay here forever. I got the message he was passing that he is going to leave my Mom if he stumbles upon some money. And I exactly told my mom this statement yesternight too.

Please you guys should advise me on what to do because at this junction, it hurts me a lot having the knowledge that my mom is with man who doesnt care or love her, even at her sick bed, he never for once visited the doctor nor the man of God taking care of my Mom.

Lekan239:
My parents got married 27years ago, since then it has been hell for my mom. It's as if my mom was forced on him or did the love just seize to exit, this I need advice on, from my brothers and sisters here on what to do next.

It all began in 1993, two years later I was born (1995), then we reside in Lagos but my dad later moved to pH in search of greener pastures. He only comes back home (Lagos) once in a while. My mom tried all her best to cater for her kids during all those period with no help or whatsoever coming from my Dad. It wasn't easy at all.

Fast forward to early 2003, my dad came visiting after two years without hearing from him and then my mom decided we are going with him to pH, he opposed but my mom Insisted. To cut the long story short, after we get to pH we found out my dad was living carelessly, womanizing, his social life is zero because he doesn't drink or smoke but he lavished all his money outside and Care less about his family.

My mom strived and engaged in little business which we managed to survive on. My dad only comes home when he is Short of money and acted low and submissive but as soon as he got some money, he changed immediately.

So 2010 I left pH to the village, was writing waec, looking for admission and so on, later going to lag to hustle around 2013 as I'm the one to foot my education expenses.

2015 I gained admission in a polytechnic, after my OND in 2017 I went back to lag to begin the hustle as I have to further my education, all this period I did not visit my family in Port Harcourt. I went back for HND in 2018 but had to withdraw because of lack of funds, I went back again in 2019 because a family member advised he will foot the bills which he later didn't do.

So because of this covid 19 I visited my parents in pH. My mom was very ill, she can't move nor stand and she has been the one taking care of the family, my father inclusive. My father has been a lazy man who depends solely on his wife for survival. He does not work, he does not stay at home with his sick wife. 6am he will enter the kitchen and eat any food he finds he won't even ask if four of his kids and my mom will eat. He will go and sit down in people's shops around the streets discussing with people's wife's. 10am he will be back home, straight to the kitchen to check if there's any food if my mom had drop money for us to prepare food, he will eat it without even talking to anybody, in fact he owns the kitchen now. He repeats same 2pm, 5pm and night meal also. I'm just so angry right now I don't even know what I am typing again.

After seeing all this behavior i advised my mother to give him some space, she gave birth to four children for him and three of us can survive on our own as we are no longer kids, but she won't obliged it's just as if maybe she is okay with suffering.

Today this morning, my dad did the most outrageous thing, he woke up and started ranting, saying does my mom think he is not going to be rich later, and he won't stay here forever. I got the message he was passing that he is going to leave my Mom if he stumbles upon some money. And I exactly told my mom this statement yesternight too.

Please you guys should advise me on what to do because at this junction, it hurts me a lot having the knowledge that my mom is with man who doesnt care or love her, even at her sick bed, he never for once visited the doctor nor the man of God taking care of my Mom.