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My Brother On Hard Drugs: 18 Years Of Pains And Sorrow. I Need Help! - Family (10) - Nairaland

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Re: My Brother On Hard Drugs: 18 Years Of Pains And Sorrow. I Need Help! by Nobody: 12:17am On May 19, 2020
No matter how much help and prayers you make for him, he still makes the decision whether be wants to be free from drugs or not.
Re: My Brother On Hard Drugs: 18 Years Of Pains And Sorrow. I Need Help! by Ejenavi18(f): 12:18am On May 19, 2020
DrObum:

I see. Your knowledge of the system gave you away. You're a nurse I guess.
I am, but still a student though.
Re: My Brother On Hard Drugs: 18 Years Of Pains And Sorrow. I Need Help! by Gloriagee(f): 12:19am On May 19, 2020
Never mock a pain you haven't felt...

adontcare:
God is not mocked. What a man/ woman sow, that they will reap. Ask ur mum and dad what they did wrong. There must be something evil they had done that is affecting ur 42 yr brother. The bible said, train up a child in d way that he should grow and when he is old he will not depart from it. They where sparing the rod on him and now spoilt
Re: My Brother On Hard Drugs: 18 Years Of Pains And Sorrow. I Need Help! by JaffyJoe(m): 12:21am On May 19, 2020
Hope you guys haven't taken him to one alfa's place in the bid to help. No disrespect but it always turns out worse in such places.
Re: My Brother On Hard Drugs: 18 Years Of Pains And Sorrow. I Need Help! by omonnakoda: 12:22am On May 19, 2020
graciousolo:


You, your god and the 26 people that liked and shared your post are sick... Is too easy to twist the god narrative to suit stupid sentiments.

That is exactly the kind of mentality needed for Pentecostal churches to thrive as they do in Nigeria.
Superstitious people who seek magical explanations and solutions to life's issues.

2 Likes

Re: My Brother On Hard Drugs: 18 Years Of Pains And Sorrow. I Need Help! by star4ever: 12:26am On May 19, 2020
JaffyJoe:
Hope you guys haven't taken him to one alfa's place in the bid to help. No disrespect but it always turns out worse in such places.

Not at all.
Re: My Brother On Hard Drugs: 18 Years Of Pains And Sorrow. I Need Help! by Efiko(m): 12:27am On May 19, 2020
If you have a relative or close family friend who is into full-time ministry/pastoral work, I advise he goes and lives with him for some time; we had a similar case in my family until my brother who is into full-time ministry took him to live with him in another city.

He is now profitable and a partner with him in ministry to the glory of God
Re: My Brother On Hard Drugs: 18 Years Of Pains And Sorrow. I Need Help! by guy222: 12:27am On May 19, 2020
Even if you take him to the best rehab centre in the whole world i can boldly tell you that nothing will change. The first rule to overcome drug addiction is the will power to change. What this means is that an addict can not be force to change, he can only change by his own decision, try your best and talk sense into him, tell him how drug has destroyed his life, tell him how he has become a disgrace to the family, tell him that if he continue like this he will not live long. Keep telling him things like this and one day it will get to his head. Before you know it that will power to change will now be build inside of him or better still get him a psychologist.

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Re: My Brother On Hard Drugs: 18 Years Of Pains And Sorrow. I Need Help! by ogbunaigwee(m): 12:29am On May 19, 2020
Find means poison am..
Re: My Brother On Hard Drugs: 18 Years Of Pains And Sorrow. I Need Help! by patjane(f): 12:35am On May 19, 2020
SMH �‍♀️
adontcare:
God is not mocked. What a man/ woman sow, that they will reap. Ask ur mum and dad what they did wrong. There must be something evil they had done that is affecting ur 42 yr brother. The bible said, train up a child in d way that he should grow and when he is old he will not depart from it. They where sparing the rod on him and now spoilt
Re: My Brother On Hard Drugs: 18 Years Of Pains And Sorrow. I Need Help! by star4ever: 12:36am On May 19, 2020
XXLMANDIGO:
Chai wasted life... embarassed

I strongly believe there is light at the end of every tunnel.

3 Likes

Re: My Brother On Hard Drugs: 18 Years Of Pains And Sorrow. I Need Help! by Slynation(m): 12:36am On May 19, 2020
star4ever:
I have a 42 year old brother who for over 18 years has been on hard drugs. He started this habit while in secondary school and couldn't finish tertiary education for same reason. Efforts made by the family to stop him from substance abuse and rehabilitate him at several occasions failed. Each time such effort is made, he recovers after a while but returns to the habit. Currently, he has become mentally deranged and there seems to be no solution at sight.

He has been admitted to different psychiatric hospitals on two occasions. At both times, he was treated and confirmed fit and sound to return to the society. The moment he was discharged, he quickly went back to his old ways and all the resources spent went into the drain. In one of the occasions, we were strongly advised to engage him as joblessness was one of the greatest problem causing the abuse. We got him engaged by securing a fantastic job which he also left after a week of working there. Other meaningful efforts geared towards engaging him to enable him to become occupied and start earning a living as a man also didn’t work out.

We have organised prayer sessions by powerful men of God, nothing has happened yet. I do want to sound like someone without faith. I strongly believe that our able God will make things beautiful at His time. However, the situation has gone out of control and we need to act fast.

These, amongst many, are some of the interventions already done by the family and we cannot fold our arms and watch people mock us in shame every day due to his abnormal activities in the community.

Now what he does is forcefully, take money from our aged mum, sell any family property at sight in exchange for money to buy his drugs. Beat my mum up at any slightest refusal to give him money. He has been jailed many times for committing several offences related to this habit, yet the problem persists. Maybe we have not applied the best approach?

I am calling on fellow Nairalanders to assist with solutions. I believe there are some of us here who may have experienced this problem in one way or the other, or have an advise to give to solve this lingering painful situation. Your personal or professional experience (s) may go a long way in salvaging this situation for us.

I believe a problem shared is a problem solved.
18yrs of habit is no childs play, this type seems irredeemable....Only him can change his ways with Gods intervention
Re: My Brother On Hard Drugs: 18 Years Of Pains And Sorrow. I Need Help! by star4ever: 12:39am On May 19, 2020
frozen70:


If you guys can take him to psychiatric hospital, there is a drug they will give him that will calm his mental state down

Take your mum away from the house because of fear of killing her

Whatever property he can sell, you guys should sell it and he will have nothing to sell

Lastly, if he continues, he will definitely commit a crime that will take him to jail

He has been there twice. I presume such drug was administered.
Re: My Brother On Hard Drugs: 18 Years Of Pains And Sorrow. I Need Help! by heartrubber(m): 12:39am On May 19, 2020
Give am urine with salt drink
Re: My Brother On Hard Drugs: 18 Years Of Pains And Sorrow. I Need Help! by star4ever: 12:41am On May 19, 2020
somtoto:
You dont force one to quit drugs.its more of a self choice.i think wat you guys should do is to sit him down and talk to him,make him see reasons why its unhealthy for him.after that,the solutions you stated can be applied.

That approach has been applied time and time again.
Re: My Brother On Hard Drugs: 18 Years Of Pains And Sorrow. I Need Help! by Judybash93(m): 12:47am On May 19, 2020
adontcare:
God is not mocked. What a man/ woman sow, that they will reap. Ask ur mum and dad what they did wrong. There must be something evil they had done that is affecting ur 42 yr brother. The bible said, train up a child in d way that he should grow and when he is old he will not depart from it. They where sparing the rod on him and now spoilt

Re: My Brother On Hard Drugs: 18 Years Of Pains And Sorrow. I Need Help! by star4ever: 12:54am On May 19, 2020
Relish5Dfloors:
I have a brother exactly this same issue . The last rehab he undergone cost us over 1M . When he came out we rented an apartment for him now the rent has expired he never worked or think of renewing his rent or utilities. Now we are about to rent a house for him again this may . In conclusion: he’s calm when around with people but has refuse to get a job and stay clean always doin drugs . Mom still pray and hope good for him . most times I feel he’s under curse or when he wan young he might have done something bad . Wide thoughts ! You never can imagine if he was your brother .

It is only when you have experienced drug abuse that you will undertand the degree of pain and frustration it can cause. I also share in your pain and pray that the good Lord will manifest Himself.
Re: My Brother On Hard Drugs: 18 Years Of Pains And Sorrow. I Need Help! by Dololo: 12:55am On May 19, 2020
You need to identify the hard drugs he does. It’s possible to substitute the drug with an antedote that has no effect. For example if an individual abuses opioid, you can place him on methadone. It’s called opioid substitution therapy (OST). Asides the OST, other factors like his environment including physical and human will have to change. Prayer works too. It’s a long healing process

1 Like

Re: My Brother On Hard Drugs: 18 Years Of Pains And Sorrow. I Need Help! by star4ever: 12:58am On May 19, 2020
namenick:
I wish I could tell you something different, but only Christ can totally turn your brothers life around. This thing you guys call addition are demons that have made his body their home.

Now the fact that someone is a pastor, has a large following, or fancy building doesn’t necessarily mean they possess the power of God.

I was an addict for a whole lot of things until Christ made me new again.

You see Mfm, I’ll forever be grateful to God for connecting me to this church. Giving your life genuinely to Christ is the first step, believing totally in the delivering power of the blood of Jesus is another step, then the next step is a church like Mfm. One of the pivotal reasons God called them, was for stubborn problems like your brother’s case.

If you guys can get the opportunity to meet up with the general overseer, that could speed up the process. But honestly, I feel like people that go manhunting for pastors to help them connect to Christ, instead of genuinely going to meet Christ, are lazy. Well for your brother’s situation(18 years in captivity) it won’t be a bad idea if you can see the general overseer.

When the demons behind the problem has been casted out, then and only then can a shrink have any effect on him.

Mountain of fire and Miracles Ministries( Dr Daniel Olukoya)

Apostle Joshua selman

God is using these men in a different way when it comes to recalcitrant problems like the case you mentioned.

God will direct you guys






Thank you. I quite appreciate.
Re: My Brother On Hard Drugs: 18 Years Of Pains And Sorrow. I Need Help! by star4ever: 1:05am On May 19, 2020
SeriouslySense:
This is really hard problem.
Because his brain needs to be un-wired from the addiction, and thoughts patterns can help disengage from this hold.

Some thoughts of pleasure from drugs can be discouraged by the realization of the consequences.

It depends on your brother, the pleasure from drugs is of much value to him, he has to build the patterns of thoughts that makes the pleasure of drugs worthless.

It is very hard to overcome the deep connection to drugs at once, you can help your brother plan, a gradual disconnection from drugs, with successive successful points.

maybe then you plan a gradual step away, like maybe
1) A plan is made to become no-more reliant on drugs such that
2) In one month, he can replace drugs with a healthy meal.
3) Build a barrier pattern that stops him from going back to drugs that will make him see it, as a dangerous, reckless substance which is just destructive and no value.

But i have no idea, how to do that, a psychologist needs to work with him and with the family

But it seems you have done so much and almost all we can think of,

Thank you. I appreciate your comment.

1 Like

Re: My Brother On Hard Drugs: 18 Years Of Pains And Sorrow. I Need Help! by mrdino(m): 1:05am On May 19, 2020
star4ever:
I have a 42 year old brother who for over 18 years has been on hard drugs. He started this habit while in secondary school and couldn't finish tertiary education for same reason. Efforts made by the family to stop him from substance abuse and rehabilitate him at several occasions failed. Each time such effort is made, he recovers after a while but returns to the habit. Currently, he has become mentally deranged and there seems to be no solution at sight.

He has been admitted to different psychiatric hospitals on two occasions. At both times, he was treated and confirmed fit and sound to return to the society. The moment he was discharged, he quickly went back to his old ways and all the resources spent went into the drain. In one of the occasions, we were strongly advised to engage him as joblessness was one of the greatest problem causing the abuse. We got him engaged by securing a fantastic job which he also left after a week of working there. Other meaningful efforts geared towards engaging him to enable him to become occupied and start earning a living as a man also didn’t work out.

We have organised prayer sessions by powerful men of God, nothing has happened yet. I do want to sound like someone without faith. I strongly believe that our able God will make things beautiful at His time. However, the situation has gone out of control and we need to act fast.

These, amongst many, are some of the interventions already done by the family and we cannot fold our arms and watch people mock us in shame every day due to his abnormal activities in the community.

Now what he does is forcefully, take money from our aged mum, sell any family property at sight in exchange for money to buy his drugs. Beat my mum up at any slightest refusal to give him money. He has been jailed many times for committing several offences related to this habit, yet the problem persists. Maybe we have not applied the best approach?

I am calling on fellow Nairalanders to assist with solutions. I believe there are some of us here who may have experienced this problem in one way or the other, or have an advise to give to solve this lingering painful situation. Your personal or professional experience (s) may go a long way in salvaging this situation for us.

I believe a problem shared is a problem solved.
There's a programme called CADAM (Christ Against Drugs and Alcohol abuse Ministry), being organized and sponsored by the RCCG (Redeemed Christian Church of God). Try enroll him in the programme.

1 Like

Re: My Brother On Hard Drugs: 18 Years Of Pains And Sorrow. I Need Help! by star4ever: 1:06am On May 19, 2020
Fulcrum15:
What type of drugs does he abuse? Is it opiate or all kinds really?

I reallyy can't specify.
Re: My Brother On Hard Drugs: 18 Years Of Pains And Sorrow. I Need Help! by SmartMen: 1:08am On May 19, 2020
adontcare:
God is not mocked. What a man/ woman sow, that they will reap. Ask ur mum and dad what they did wrong. There must be something evil they had done that is affecting ur 42 yr brother. The bible said, train up a child in d way that he should grow and when he is old he will not depart from it. They where sparing the rod on him and now spoilt
shut up your mouth and get out if you don't have anything to say.

Why haven't use this to find the cure of Corona virus?

You people are so stupid that you don't know your limit when discussing serious issue.

Did God told you not to use your brain.

Go and cure corona and come back to have better discussion.
Re: My Brother On Hard Drugs: 18 Years Of Pains And Sorrow. I Need Help! by star4ever: 1:11am On May 19, 2020
tenderjunkie:

OP, a quite touching experience you've shared. Unfortunately I have a relative battling addiction as well

The truth is, drug addiction is messy and it's best not to even start.
A study once revealed that a rat will rather die being hooked to cocaine than go in search of food.
It's bad enough to be hooked on drugs, but our society has made it almost impossible for addicts to overcome the addiction.
Our churches have failed woefully in this regard.
You complain of addiction and they hook you on prayers, as though prayer is the end result.
Prayer is only a tool to get to the end result.
Aside prayer the churches have failed to set up establishments to fully rehabilitate drug addicts.

I'm not talking of rehabs were you go and spend sometime then when you're out you relapse.

I'm talking of complete rehabilitation in the mind, body and spirit. A rehab center were as you're taking time off drugs, you're introduced to vocations, life changing principles, truths about life. Even when you get out, you're monitored and you're actively engaged in something of purpose.
Who better to implement this than the church?
After all we are the light of the world and the salt of the earth.
Church is not only to collect tithe and build cathedrals. They should have a meaningful impact on the society as well.

OP, concerning your brother's case, so called big men of God won't work any miracle. Your brother will have to find God for himself

Your points have been noted. I appreciate.
Re: My Brother On Hard Drugs: 18 Years Of Pains And Sorrow. I Need Help! by SmartMen: 1:12am On May 19, 2020
adontcare:
I rest my case
why won't rest? U can't defend yourself.

Your likes are the ones giving Christianity a bad image cos I don't know when to draw the limit and apply the brain God gave you.
Re: My Brother On Hard Drugs: 18 Years Of Pains And Sorrow. I Need Help! by akpur1(m): 1:13am On May 19, 2020
That guy should be killed or disowned. Peace of mind is the key
Re: My Brother On Hard Drugs: 18 Years Of Pains And Sorrow. I Need Help! by Omijin: 1:14am On May 19, 2020
litigator:


Buy him tapes and let him find his why. Until he finds his why, nothing will stop. I had a friend who was in this same shoe, until he found his why. Now he is becoming better. Gradually reducing usuage and finding his way back.

Nothing will save your bro but himself. Don't for a second think he is not trying to stop using . But the dopamine addiction is getting the better of him. Nothing will help him until he finds a way round his dopamine. He needs to find something else to feed his dopamine. Addiction is just damn strong to break at times.

I could send you one YouTube video that helped my friend tremendously. Perhaps, it could help your brother too.
Please share the video. I have similar problem, but my case is not that to the extent of becoming violent. I wish to stop but not an easy thing to do.
Shalom.
Re: My Brother On Hard Drugs: 18 Years Of Pains And Sorrow. I Need Help! by wickyyolo: 1:15am On May 19, 2020
I take drugs like Steve Jobs but it makes me more productive. I don’t understand the kind of drugs he is taking. It’s all about mindset.

Drugs have made me more caring, more generous with my money. More active In societal matters. Although, nowadays I am a social user. Once in a month.
Re: My Brother On Hard Drugs: 18 Years Of Pains And Sorrow. I Need Help! by star4ever: 1:16am On May 19, 2020
ajl:


See people talking about psychology or psychiatrists. Why continue to recommend solution that has failed multiple times. And you are an African. More so, your brother is not mentally deranged. Try traditional means. It may sound stupid. But out of all the solutions you listed that you have tried, that's the only one that is missing. But not any traditionalist can do this. Your brother does not have a mental problem but only an habit that has eaten deep to him. He is not himself any more and he is possibly under the control of dark entities that profits from his habits and the grief he brings to his family. Don't get me wrong. I am not saying there are people behind his travails. But his state of being as it is, is "food" for negative entities that operate unseen around us. Remember this in case you are a Christian , Ephesians 6:12 "For we do not wrestle against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this age, against spiritual hosts of wickedness in the heavenly places."

So, be open minded about the options available. And hopefully you have not been brainwashed about African tradition treatments. I am a PhD scientist and I know modern science or medicine does not provide solutions to every health problem.

Thank you
Re: My Brother On Hard Drugs: 18 Years Of Pains And Sorrow. I Need Help! by star4ever: 1:19am On May 19, 2020
ensamy:
This is simple to Restore: He has been LIVING IN BONDAGE for more than 20years. The impure spirits have formed Thier military headquarter inside of him. So he is manifesting alot of different personalities. His situation seems hopeless but it is not. They is hope for FULL RESTORATION.
Exorcise those little demonic entities.
Why all the Churches are failing to heal him is that they are all trying to drive the entities away. No they will not go away because that is Thier legal property. The only JUST way they will leave is to RELOCATE them the boy will be made whole immediately.
How do you relocate them to an animal or into a tree . Jesus did same with the madman of the Garderen with 2000 Legions of demonic spirits.
The strong man should try to Relocate them. cool shocked

which strongman?
Re: My Brother On Hard Drugs: 18 Years Of Pains And Sorrow. I Need Help! by mizzyoma(f): 1:21am On May 19, 2020
Pikin wey, wan spoil go spoil, I have seen Righteous parents who train their kids well in the right way morally, Godly and 1 out of them will either get pregnant or turn out like the case under review. In most cases it's always when they are out of the family, they want to feel among, cases like pastors kids etcs, Truth remains that every adults must choose their path, this guy in question joined bad gang in school not under the tutelage of his parents. So please don't always generalise issues. I rest my case.

But yet, here you are trying to reap gauva on a mango tree. OP said “drugs” and you're saying something else about parental sins. undecided[/quote]
Re: My Brother On Hard Drugs: 18 Years Of Pains And Sorrow. I Need Help! by star4ever: 1:24am On May 19, 2020
merahki:



You are right, sadly. First thing in mental/psychological therapy is insight into the problem. He has to know he has a problem with substances. He has to know that he should quit the habit. He has to desire to get well, in essence. Then every other help can work.
Good luck OP
I am rooting for your family. You are doing an amazing job trying to get help for your brother.
May you be healed from this


Amen!

1 Like

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