₦airaland Forum

Liposure:
if its a sin, why do we develop sex hormones so early.

Developing and using are two separate things my dear.

....and until we partner with the HOLY SPIRIT about how to live our lives, we would be victims of the PRINCIPLES of the world.

God knew about our bodies (by the way he created it) and that's why he instituted MARRIAGE!

Marriage is for us to enjoy those hormones after we are rightly JOINED IN HOLY MATRIMONY.

Dyt:
What is Before, In Between and After?

Yeah we all know marriage is an institution between 2 persons with the aim to have offspring and companionship, but is this all we see and make of it?

I am a person that believes in relationship/marriage and tries to go far in making it work well except when it starts to affect my mental health (i cant go mad all in the name of i want it to work)

Some say marriage is easy while some say its a hard work, we all have different opinions..
I for one been married before, it didnt work not because i couldnt try but (my choice anyway)

I am considering going into another and all the things that we do that counts now may not in few years, I mean the sexiness, the kamasutra and all, well ofcourse i am not just gonna be offering just sex, we both got more to keep us going for a 100years to come (my favourite part is the friendship and companionship)...

I am scared sometimes waking up to him every other day and same way it excites me

How has it been with those married for 5years and counting? the joy, feeling, the tears, the arguments, the sex, I mean all of it....

let me leave my opinion here:
1) I think we see too much in today's world compare to the time of our parent. This has caused more pressure on the marriage. we read about others seemingly magical marriage, we hear about how others are enjoying their marriage etc. this leads to comparison.
2) Many people, especially ladies marry just anybody that is eligible and fit into their physical expectations in marriage. This is why you see ladies marry someone from abroad just within a month of courtship.
ladies don't want to manage and suffer with anyone, they constantly look for the better life and decide to take the risk.
but in reality, long courtship and allowance for time to get to know each other is hugely important.
This are some of the reason for marriage failures in marriages. pressure due to the fact we see a lot of things online, insufficient time to get to know each other, and I must add a third (3) social media, pornography (images of perfect body) and the internet in general, have made seeking out and keeping relationship outside marriages more easy. you don't have to write letter to organise a meeting, you can actually be chatting to a concubine while you are on the same bed with your wife.

canDy4eva:
Developing and using are two separate things my dear.

....and until we partner with the HOLY SPIRIT about how to live our lives, we would be victims of the PRINCIPLES of the world.

God knew about our bodies (by the way he created it) and that's why he instituted MARRIAGE!

Marriage is for us to enjoy those hormones after we are rightly JOINED IN HOLY MATRIMONY.

was it easy 4 u in the first place. Cos U talk as if u hav absolute control over innate carnal desires

Dyt:
What is Before, In Between and After?

Yeah we all know marriage is an institution between 2 persons with the aim to have offspring and companionship, but is this all we see and make of it?

I am a person that believes in relationship/marriage and tries to go far in making it work well except when it starts to affect my mental health (i cant go mad all in the name of i want it to work)

Some say marriage is easy while some say its a hard work, we all have different opinions..
I for one been married before, it didnt work not because i couldnt try but (my choice anyway)

I am considering going into another and all the things that we do that counts now may not in few years, I mean the sexiness, the kamasutra and all, well ofcourse i am not just gonna be offering just sex, we both got more to keep us going for a 100years to come (my favourite part is the friendship and companionship)...

I am scared sometimes waking up to him every other day and same way it excites me

How has it been with those married for 5years and counting? the joy, feeling, the tears, the arguments, the sex, I mean all of it....

let me leave my opinion here:
1) I think we see too much in today's world compared to the time of our parents. This has caused more pressure on marriage. we read about others seemingly 'magical' marriages, we hear about how others are enjoying their marriage etc. this leads to comparison.
2) Many people, especially ladies marry just anybody that is eligible and fit into their physical expectations in marriage. This is why you see ladies marrying someone from abroad just within a month of courtship.
ladies don't want to manage and suffer with anyone, they constantly look for the better life and decide to take the risk.
but in reality, long courtship and allowance for time to get to know each other is hugely important.
These are some of the reason for failures in marriages. pressure due to the fact we see a lot of things online, insufficient time to get to know each other, and I must add a third, (3) social media, pornography (images of perfect body) and the internet in general, have made seeking out and keeping relationship outside marriages more easy. you don't have to write letter to organise a meeting in this age, you can actually be chatting to a concubine while you are on the same bed with your wife.

Liposure:
innate carnal desires

thinkmoney:
let me leave my opinion here:
1) I think we see too much in today's world compare to the time of our parent. This has caused more pressure on the marriage. we read about others seemingly magical marriage, we hear about how others are enjoying their marriage etc. this leads to comparison.
2) Many people, especially ladies marry just anybody that is eligible and fit into their physical expectations in marriage. This is why you see ladies marry someone from abroad just within a month of courtship.
ladies don't want to manage and suffer with anyone, they constantly look for the better life and decide to take the risk.
but in reality, long courtship and allowance for time to get to know each other is hugely important.
This are some of the reason for marriage failures in marriages. pressure due to the fact we see a lot of things online, insufficient time to get to know each other, and I must add a third (3) social media, pornography (images of perfect body) and the internet in general, as made seeking out and keeping relationship outside marriages more easy. you don't have to write letter to organise a meeting, you can actually be chatting to a concubine while you are on the same bed with your wife.

Dyt:
I feel it's kinda hard for you sharing this
But I keen on knowing how YOU have been able to manage your mental health

it has not been easy with me developing high bp this year but I looking at being separated for a while and see whether i want to still go ahead and if he's ready to fight for us. I'm tired of being the one always doing the fighting.

cutechioma1:
it has not been easy with me developing high bp this year but I looking at being separated for a while and see whether i want to still go ahead and if he's ready to fight for us. I'm tired of being the one always doing the fighting.

If you feel that's what you need
Pls go get it

No one deserves to be mentally stressed
You lose it all

I pray God heals every of the hole in your heart
It seems so much to bear

You will overcome

Marriage is sweet to me because I got married to a woman who can easily accept mistakes,who can adjust to any situation and I also take things easy because of my humble training.

cutechioma1:
I think the expectations of life can be hard on a marriage. Thought I married my best friend, until we actually got married and he changed. Always hooking up with his exs, finds it hard staying at home, drinks a lot. He told me on our wedding night that he never thought he will marry a girl like me( meaning he could have done better). Our marriage has never been the same since then. He claims its because he has not been stable financially and I'm always the one paying the bills. I have not complained cos I know how much he hustling. Now 8 years and I'm thinking of calling it quits. I'm always feeling sad, depressed and resentment.

Call it quits already.

You'll thank me later

crackkhaus:
If I add any more sense to the one I'm already blessed with, I might just run mad.

Hahahaha

ehix89:
You have every right to feel however you want to.

Pardon my asking, how committed are you to this unending institution, plus do you lash out at your husband some days when you feel the whole marriage thing is choking you.

I think you have to know me personally to truly understand what I mean. I am 100% committed to my marriage if that's what you are asking. But I'm also not one of those I-must-stay-married-even-if-it-kills-me type.

I don't lash out at my husband, if anything he makes marriage more bearable for me. I knew I had no choice but to get married if I wanted to have kids, and I love love love kids.

But I also love my solitude. I've lived alone for like forever and I think I got too used to being alone, being free, being independent.

Gaggi:
I'm happy to be a husband and a father. I've basically always had peace and joy in marriage but I was also foolish enough to want to explore outside marriage. I would have easily been burnt by getting caught, having a disease or an illegitimate child but I was lucky or blessed to find my self back before getting burnt. Now I strive to be the best husband and father out there. Curiosity made me explore and I realized there is nothing out there. Some also tried it and it destroyed them and their family.

Marriage is never the same for everyone. Some have it turbulent, some smooth and some neutral. What I believe is that marriage is mainly luck and a bit of effort. Almost a decade of blissful happiness not because I'm special but because I got lucky to get a compatible partner. Some people are good but unfortunate to be married to a person who has little or nothing in common with them.

Do you think your wife ever gets tempted to 'explore' too?

Dyt:
I dunno but I believe we are meant to have a life time companion


Was I scammed to believe that?

Lol, I guess when we are old and frail we will need someone to pass the time with.

I bet you wouldn't ever feel same without him
It's been 10years

That's a whole life together ma'am
I wouldn't trade that for anything well except if my life is on the line

I wann a celebrate golden jubilee God willing

I probably won't. I feel like we've been together forever. Whew!

Amen . . . one golden Jubilee coming right to you, as ordered

UjuJoan2:
Lol, I guess when we are old and frail we will need someone to pass the time with.



I probably won't. I feel like we've been together forever. Whew!

Amen . . . one golden Jubilee coming right to you, as ordered

Gbammm

cutechioma1:
I think the expectations of life can be hard on a marriage. Thought I married my best friend, until we actually got married and he changed. Always hooking up with his exs, finds it hard staying at home, drinks a lot. He told me on our wedding night that he never thought he will marry a girl like me( meaning he could have done better). Our marriage has never been the same since then. He claims its because he has not been stable financially and I'm always the one paying the bills. I have not complained cos I know how much he hustling. Now 8 years and I'm thinking of calling it quits. I'm always feeling sad, depressed and resentment.

Aww . . .

Listen to me, you deserve better. Don't ever let anyone make you think otherwise. I bet he never could have married woman strong enough to take care of the home when he couldn't. . . He's lucky you married him.

Please ignore that man and learn to find happiness in yourself, you children, your job, your life. . . . Don't let his negative energy weigh you down.

Righteousness89:
The Simplest way to a Successful Home/Marriage is not to Marry Just by Sight or feelings.
It is not Enough !

My Advice to anyone is to seek to Hear from GOD for Direction . It saves you from a Whole lot of Stress and Struggles.

I also advice people not to seek GOD with someone in Mind..

Seek For His Choice with an open heart..

Every Man /woman has a designed Perfect better half. But Many of us are either in a Rush or filled with obsessions and infatuations, so we don't hear or see GOD'S Choice..

Secondly, No Matter The Lecture or Marriage seminar you attend before Marriage, if you Don't Follow the GOD Prescribed Principle for Marriage, it will Be Struggle and stress all the way.

What is GOD'S Prescribed Principle for a Happy Home?
Ephesians 5:22-25
22 Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord.
23 For the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the church: and he is the saviour of the body.
24 Therefore as the church is subject unto Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in every thing.
25 Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave himself for it;

It's a 2 way thing for both the Man and The Woman...

If you look at the World, it is this principle the devil has used to Destroy and Shatter homes.

The devil Understands the Power and Strength in 2people coming together, so he attacks it with so Many names e.g. Feminist, Equal right, etc..

devil is a very smart guy and he devices various smart means that look good to the eye. All to ensure that Marriages do not Work.

Lastly , I do not Believe in Marry, Divorce/Sepration and Marry again..

I Believe that if it is comes to a point where you come to divorce, then you should Not Remarry Except at the death of your Spouse As that is what My Bible says..

Another Exception is a case where you are not the First Wife or Husband of the Person..

May GOD ALMIGHTY Help us to be Paitent Enough to Hear his Choice for us in JESUS NAME..

My thoughts exactly!

Dyt:
i always believed people nag because they want something

People never understand that if they only did the right thing there won't be any reason to nag.

UjuJoan2:
People never understand that if they only did the right thing there won't be any reason to nag.

Marry me

cococandy:
I corrected my post. It’s 6 going on 7
I don’t know where I’m rushing to.

Keeping an open mind about the sex I guess

When I was younger I thought it would be a bad marriage if the husband and wife don’t have sex everyday. Cos you’re supposed to be attracted to each other all the time bla bla bla.

But you grow and learn each other. And you realize that if you’re both happy and content, whatever route you took to get there even if it doesn’t fit the ideal romance is a good one.

Very true.
Na all these "suppose to"s dey destroy marriage upandam.
Marriage is a matter of anything you see you work with.
So long as the other person is not being intentionally evil.

crackkhaus:
One would assume that being married before would have provided some kind of perspective and realistic expectations about what the next one will be like.

Or did the previous one last only two months?
https://www.reactiongifs.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/02/very_interesting.gif

You know that's just it . . . It's probably going to be the same thing the second time around. Except the man was as abuser which of course makes it an exception.

I used to think things would have turned out different if I married my ex . . . but now, with time I see, we probably would have gone through the same struggles, maybe even worse.

That's why I've decided never ever to get married again if anything happens to my marriage!

PS: Your last sentence was not nice!

Dyt:
Marry me

Righteousness89:
The Simplest way to a Successful Home/Marriage is not to Marry Just by Sight or feelings.
It is not Enough !

My Advice to anyone is to seek to Hear from GOD for Direction . It saves you from a Whole lot of Stress and Struggles.

I also advice people not to seek GOD with someone in Mind..

Seek For His Choice with an open heart..

Every Man /woman has a designed Perfect better half. But Many of us are either in a Rush or filled with obsessions and infatuations, so we don't hear or see GOD'S Choice..

Secondly, No Matter The Lecture or Marriage seminar you attend before Marriage, if you Don't Follow the GOD Prescribed Principle for Marriage, it will Be Struggle and stress all the way.

What is GOD'S Prescribed Principle for a Happy Home?
Ephesians 5:22-25
22 Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord.
23 For the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the church: and he is the saviour of the body.
24 Therefore as the church is subject unto Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in every thing.
25 Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave himself for it;

It's a 2 way thing for both the Man and The Woman...

If you look at the World, it is this principle the devil has used to Destroy and Shatter homes.

The devil Understands the Power and Strength in 2people coming together, so he attacks it with so Many names e.g. Feminist, Equal right, etc..

devil is a very smart guy and he devices various smart means that look good to the eye. All to ensure that Marriages do not Work.

Lastly , I do not Believe in Marry, Divorce/Sepration and Marry again..

I Believe that if it is comes to a point where you come to divorce, then you should Not Remarry Except at the death of your Spouse As that is what My Bible says..

Another Exception is a case where you are not the First Wife or Husband of the Person..

May GOD ALMIGHTY Help us to be Paitent Enough to Hear his Choice for us in JESUS NAME..

You are so right

Liposure:
was it easy 4 u in the first place. Cos U talk as if u hav absolute control over innate carnal desires

No it wasn't...

I called on the HOLY SPIRIT and that was it.

Remember... You can do all things through Christ who strengthens you!

By strength shall no man prevail.

Omoluabi16:
mechonu eba! Your husband is a good man and you're feeling so caged. Like you didn't know marriage was a responsibility.
restriction keeyouder

The freedom of jump from one D to another is no longer there.

Never forget to protect your woman from herself. I mean, protect her from her bad behaviours.

UjuJoan2:
People never understand that if they only did the right thing there won't be any reason to nag.

This isn't entirely true.  People who nag, or whine, are of two classes:

- People who're innately sententious and insatiable - narcissists fall in this category.

- People who're being taken for granted by their partners despite continually using voluntary slavery to sustain their relationship for too long or outright oppressed people.

Youngzedd:
The freedom of jump from one D to another is no longer there.

Never forget to protect your woman from herself. I mean, protect her from her bad behaviours.

So you think I will ever f00l myself over Ds? What is in the D that someone has never seen before? Or is there any D made of $$££ or gold, or something that will make me taller or fatter? Do you think I will let random men insert their disgusting Ds in me in order to satisfy their animalistic desires, married or not? Please tell me again what I stand to gain by 'jumping from D to D'

You men think too highly of yourselves. . . . Mtcheeeeew!

LordKO:
This isn't entirely true.  People who nag, or whine, are of two classes:

- People who're innately sententious and insatiable - narcissists fall in this category.

- People who're taken for granted for too long by their partners despite continually using voluntary slavery to sustain their relationship for too long  or outright oppressed people.

Even obsessive people want things done in a certain way, do that for them and they will have nothing to obsess over.

UjuJoan2:
Even obsessive people want things done in a certain way, do that for them and they will have nothing to obsess over.

An obsessive person isn't automatically a narcissist, a narcissistic person can never be satiable.

averagejoee:
[s]What I have come to realise for people like you is that you are really scared of discovering the real Truth that JESUS is the only way[/s]

Jesus never existed.

canDy4eva:
It's only a FOOL that says in his heart "there is no God"...

Only a fool believes in the supernatural and the existence of a supreme being.

Brainwashed fool.