₦airaland Forum

You obviously block your husband from giving his family enough money with ur smartness, pls stop it. Even if it was a scam its left to her brother to decide whether to pay or not.
The family now feel they can only get money from their brother thru you his wife, and that's a very bad thing. Let ur husband decide wat and wen to give to his family. Finally use your smartness to mend ur relationship with ur in laws and if ur husband is wealthy tell him to give some money to the sister she obviously needs money.

Amya:
I've been looking to get a federal agency job in Abuja...

Please did i do wrong?



Modified: For those asking me to talk to hubby, ofcourse i did but he genuinely believes his sister was trying to help and since i couldnt point out outright that the whole thing smelt of scam, hr thinks i rejected the offer because of pride. But i know better. It didnt cause serious issue between us though.

You did not do anything wrong and you do not awe anyone any apologies!

So many things wrong.

1. You sound lile those who are not too smart and easily fall for job scams and pastor scams, prayer scams etc.
2. You have poor communication with your husband.
3. Your husband has leaches in his mother and sister. They have a sense of entitlement. The kind that will wreck your family.

Be wise.

Tell your husband the truth and your feelings about the whole thing.

womenareapes:
you try to be smart, but little did you know that you are dumb.

now your husband will be paying for your lack of intelligent

MAJORITY OF NAIJA WOMEN HAVE AN IQ OF A LIZARD.

Did you even read the post?

afecgivers:
Scam! When it's not your money. This is the reason I avoid family or relative business, she is a family member, let her know if the job doesn't go through she will refund the money. Maybe your hubby is stingy and the family planned a means to obtain money through job scam as they believe it's the only way your hubby will drop the cash....you come bust their game.. You wicked. Now it's now family wahala. And you are not there when they were raising him. Anyway you smart.

She can scam him through other means not using me in the process. If my hubby pays for this scam, can i in good conscience expect him to pay again when the genuine slot comes around?

GodPunishBiafra:
No! Polygamy. Husband has many wives.

not polygamy

DardyGentle:
From your story all blame should really be on you as you are experiencing now.
First of all, why didn't you tell your husband from the start that his sister was trying to help you with a job and see his reaction. Even when she wanted to tell him herself why didn't you give the go ahead so that even if it was a scam, your husband will deal with it as she is his sister and the blame is not on your head.

Secondly we all know most of these job opportunities is who know who and money changing hands. What if she was genuinely trying to help you maybe because she knows they won't accept her age and probably she don't have the qualification you have to fit in. Maybe she wanted to help you so that when you enter you might not forget her with some little monthly tithes from your salary.

Sometimes people need to think about things from different angles and not just one perspective which they believe in. The reason I am saying this is because everyone didn't see it as a scam including your husband which means there is probably some genuine connect in what she was trying to do just maybe she added some extra cash to the fee they requested or they might be right about the way they see you.

Seems you're just too desperate to fault me. It was a scam simple and short.

Amya:
I've been looking to get a federal agency job in Abuja for a while now and haven't yet had any reasonable connection.

My sister inlaw ( husband's sister) a lady in her mid 40s who's divorced and a hustler type still trying to find her feet called me up one day and told me a friend of hers had a connection for Civil Defence and i should email my CV right away to her. I have never discussed jobs with her before so the call took me by surprise. I wasnt particular keen on Civil Defence and as a lawyer i had my sights much higher on parastatal or agency jobs. She might have sensed my reluctance on the phone and she went on to say

"I'm just doing you a favour ooo, many people are hoping for opportunities as this"

She had this tone of urgency.

I didnt especially like how she was hurrying me as i never approach anything with desperation and as such, have never been scammed. I told her I'll get back to her. Two hours later, she was messaging me on whatsapp that she hadn't seen my CV on her mailbox. I replied her saying

"Aunty i haven't sent it ooo, is the job slot free because me i don't have money ooo"

This was a very dicey situation for me because this woman is over 10 years my senior and i wanted to be as diplomatic as possible without causing family wahala.

She read my response but didnt reply.

Very early the next morning she called me and when i picked up, she said that the job wasnt free but the price wasnt too much, just N350k. That i shouldn't worry that she'll call my hubby (her brother) and ask him for the money. When i saw she was still pushing, i opened up to her that even if i wanted to pay for a job slot, it definitely wasnt going to be a Civil Defence job as i had my sights set on agencies and parastatals. I knew she was upset by how her voice changed. "Agencies? What's that?" I told her like NNPC, DPR, NCC and the likes
"NNPC? ehnnn.. Okay" She cut the call and i heaved a sigh that it was over. It wasn't.

Two days later, this woman called me again to tell me she has an NNPC job for me.

(you've gat to be kidding me!)

She said that her friend knows the director and he asked for one million but after begging him, he agreed to take 500k she started with her hurrying tactics that i had only 24hrs and if payment wasn't made before then that the offer will be withdrawn. At that time, NNPC were done with their recruitment process and i didnt even apply and knowing how stringent NNPC recruitment was, i knew that offer was impossible. She went on that if I didn't have the cash that she'd call her brother (hubby) to make the transfer immediately. I knew right then without a doubt that this woman wanted to use me to obtain her brother by all means. She can try to scam him directly and if he falls mugu, good for her but why try to use me in the scam? I went further with questioning her on the supposed NNPC job. "Please Aunty the director that is helping, where is he?
" Abuja nau" she replied getting irritated with my questioning.

She was in Lagos and i was in Abuja at the time
so i asked her if i could meet the supposed director one on one and pay him directly and even promised to reward her and her friend handsomely if the deal pulls through.

"No" she said abruptly "you pay the money to my account and ill give it to my friend to make the payment. All you have to do is just hope and pray"

Pray... That word. I knew then without a doubt that this Aunty was trying to scam me.

I told her "Aunty please dont be angry, i know you mean well for my future and want me to get a good job in NNPC but right now I've already paid part payment for another job somewhere and i wouldn't want to invest in two places at once" That wasnt true, i just had to get her off my tail once and for all. She was shocked. She angrily cut the call. She wanted to finesse her brother out of some cash using my future, what happens when the real slot comes around. Would i expect him to pay twice?

Her mum (mil) called me and started blasting me. Saying I'm feeling too big to be helped and her daughter was only trying to help me and now she never wanted to have anything to do with me again. That i should call her daughter and take the offer so that peace would reign. I didnt. Even my hubby blamed me and i couldn't even open my mouth to tell anyone i thought the whole setup was a scam. That's such a big accusation to make. The family dislike for me grew worse because of that incident.

Please did i do wrong?



Modified: For those asking me to talk to hubby, ofcourse i did but he genuinely believes his sister was trying to help and since i couldnt point out outright that the whole thing smelt of scam, hr thinks i rejected the offer because of pride. But i know better. It didnt cause serious issue between us though.

Sis you did well. Because if the money goes you won't be able to say much too. Better to keep your money in your pocket.

And as long as no issues with your hubby. Pls feel free

U simply ave a problem with his family . I said so because u could have simply told ur husband and allow him pay since he believes them more if If turns out to be a scam then fine u were plain about it .

That's what happens when you marry outside friendship... If you had a bond with your husband, he wouldn't believe his sister over you

Liftmaster:
It may have escaped your notice, but the scheme you described is illegal, immoral and abhorrent. What is the money to be used for? Bribe the Director? Curry favor from a government agency or directorate? It is unfortunate that this type of behavior is generally accepted in Nigerian society today. In case you're wondering what you should have done, you should have stated clearly that this is an illegal act and you will not be involved in such a despicable scheme. If you have 350 - 500k laying around, why not start a business or invest in something? If bribery is what it takes to get a govt agency job, you should abstain, maintain your honor and prevent any blemish to your conscience.

A lawyer for that matter

No need to read the whole story. All I know is that ur sister in-law is a big time HUSTLER

Liftmaster:
It may have escaped your notice, but the scheme you described is illegal, immoral and abhorrent. What is the money to be used for? Bribe the Director? Curry favor from a government agency or directorate? It is unfortunate that this type of behavior is generally accepted in Nigerian society today. In case you're wondering what you should have done, you should have stated clearly that this is an illegal act and you will not be involved in such a despicable scheme. If you have 350 - 500k laying around, why not start a business or invest in something? If bribery is what it takes to get a govt agency job, you should abstain, maintain your honor and prevent any blemish to your conscience.

Just the comment I was looking for. I've always doubted if I truly belong to this society.

If you have been hurt by family, you would know that this African family thing should be scrapped!!! I have seen where parents, inlaws, friends etc are devils.

If you have a good family and extended family, just thank God.

Op, you did right and shouldn't even get disturbed over her reaction. That was pure scam.

You should've put your husband in the pix and allow him handle the issue himself in order for you to play safe as you know our culture here with in-laws and their wahala. They will tag you with 'ego' issue.

Also watch your back smartly, even food, whenever they around, as that type of lady could try to get you out of her/their way by all means, in order to get what she wants from your hubby.

Amya:
I've been looking to get a federal agency job in Abuja for a while now and haven't yet had any reasonable connection.

My sister inlaw ( husband's sister) a lady in her mid 40s who's divorced and a hustler type still trying to find her feet called me up one day and told me a friend of hers had a connection for Civil Defence and i should email my CV right away to her. I have never discussed jobs with her before so the call took me by surprise. I wasnt particular keen on Civil Defence and as a lawyer i had my sights much higher on parastatal or agency jobs. She might have sensed my reluctance on the phone and she went on to say

"I'm just doing you a favour ooo, many people are hoping for opportunities as this"

She had this tone of urgency.

I didnt especially like how she was hurrying me as i never approach anything with desperation and as such, have never been scammed. I told her I'll get back to her. Two hours later, she was messaging me on whatsapp that she hadn't seen my CV on her mailbox. I replied her saying

"Aunty i haven't sent it ooo, is the job slot free because me i don't have money ooo"

This was a very dicey situation for me because this woman is over 10 years my senior and i wanted to be as diplomatic as possible without causing family wahala.

She read my response but didnt reply.

Very early the next morning she called me and when i picked up, she said that the job wasnt free but the price wasnt too much, just N350k. That i shouldn't worry that she'll call my hubby (her brother) and ask him for the money. When i saw she was still pushing, i opened up to her that even if i wanted to pay for a job slot, it definitely wasnt going to be a Civil Defence job as i had my sights set on agencies and parastatals. I knew she was upset by how her voice changed. "Agencies? What's that?" I told her like NNPC, DPR, NCC and the likes
"NNPC? ehnnn.. Okay" She cut the call and i heaved a sigh that it was over. It wasn't.

Two days later, this woman called me again to tell me she has an NNPC job for me.

(you've gat to be kidding me!)

She said that her friend knows the director and he asked for one million but after begging him, he agreed to take 500k she started with her hurrying tactics that i had only 24hrs and if payment wasn't made before then that the offer will be withdrawn. At that time, NNPC were done with their recruitment process and i didnt even apply and knowing how stringent NNPC recruitment was, i knew that offer was impossible. She went on that if I didn't have the cash that she'd call her brother (hubby) to make the transfer immediately. I knew right then without a doubt that this woman wanted to use me to obtain her brother by all means. She can try to scam him directly and if he falls mugu, good for her but why try to use me in the scam? I went further with questioning her on the supposed NNPC job. "Please Aunty the director that is helping, where is he?
" Abuja nau" she replied getting irritated with my questioning.

She was in Lagos and i was in Abuja at the time
so i asked her if i could meet the supposed director one on one and pay him directly and even promised to reward her and her friend handsomely if the deal pulls through.

"No" she said abruptly "you pay the money to my account and ill give it to my friend to make the payment. All you have to do is just hope and pray"

Pray... That word. I knew then without a doubt that this Aunty was trying to scam me.

I told her "Aunty please dont be angry, i know you mean well for my future and want me to get a good job in NNPC but right now I've already paid part payment for another job somewhere and i wouldn't want to invest in two places at once" That wasnt true, i just had to get her off my tail once and for all. She was shocked. She angrily cut the call. She wanted to finesse her brother out of some cash using my future, what happens when the real slot comes around. Would i expect him to pay twice?

Her mum (mil) called me and started blasting me. Saying I'm feeling too big to be helped and her daughter was only trying to help me and now she never wanted to have anything to do with me again. That i should call her daughter and take the offer so that peace would reign. I didnt. Even my hubby blamed me and i couldn't even open my mouth to tell anyone i thought the whole setup was a scam. That's such a big accusation to make. The family dislike for me grew worse because of that incident.

Please did i do wrong?



Modified: For those asking me to talk to hubby, ofcourse i did but he genuinely believes his sister was trying to help and since i couldnt point out outright that the whole thing smelt of scam, hr thinks i rejected the offer because of pride. But i know better. It didnt cause serious issue between us though.

Correct bae.

Thank God, your hubby understands sha. She was betting on you wanting to be in her good books. I hope your hubby doesnt offend you sha, you stubborn pa �

You sound arrogant though , maybe based on your profession, if not you would have informed your husband from the first call she made about the job opening , but you were trying to do sss work on your in law. Now it's her word against yours, work on personal relationship with your in laws, because if they dislike you, it will go down to affect your generation. Forget whatever qualification you have, even if your in laws are not well schooled, you don't have to rub it all over their faces.

Sorry ooh.

Your sister in law is a learner, instead of she to open up to you how much she need money and both of you will devise a plan to Bill your hubby. I ..if I have a brother that is rich, they way i go nice to his wife hen. Them fit dey suspect say we dey date. Because I go cherish and be very respectful to her . Even if she be small pickin, na to dey say yes Ma, because anytime I wan bill my brother. Na she go push the level.

You did the best thing anyways! But I feel you should tell your husband what you observed and why you feel it's a scam. And if he say you should go ahead to do it, tell him he should pay. Don't worry when the Kasala eventually burst they won't blame you. And them go settle am.but some people no get shame Sha. How u go do that to family .is your husband stingy to her ni? All the best Mama.

You don't need a soothsayer to tell you it's a scam! If your hubby believes his sister enough to pay her for the slot, let him go ahead then.

BabaJoe001:
Your sister in law is a learner, instead of she to open up to you how much she need money and both of you will devise a plan to scam your hubby. We call it sister Love.

You did the best thing anyways! But I feel you should tell your husband what you observed and why you feel it's a scam. And if he say you should go ahead to do it, tell him he should pay. Don't worry when the Kasala eventually burst they won't blame you. And them go settle am.but some people no get shame Sha. How u go do that to family .is your husband stingy to her ni? All the best Mama.

No one else would be there when hubby begins to throw indirect insults at the person that made him waste half a million. All the "but I said it was suspicious" would not matter at that point. God forbid he had financial difficulties right after then, her decision of any business in the future would be second guessed.

She did what she could by protecting her hubby and at the same time not bad mouthing hubby's sister. It takes a lot to not speak out when everyone including the ones you are protecting accuse one wrongly.

She tried.

Xanslyte:
Pls help me lemme eat before I go and jobhunt tomorrow.Even if it's 400 lemme add to the change in my account.Ill look for pos or bank that discharges it.Pls my account is on my signature.Pls I'm hungry and I cannot steal because they will burn me.Thank you.

Lol.Did you want to steal before?

I GUESS SHE IS AN ELDER SISTER TO UR HUBBY!SOME PEOPLE CULD BE SO SHAMELESS ANYWAY!!

Righteousness89:
My Sister, I did not see any Wrong doing from you..

it was a Scam ! And that just it!

It's Either your Sister tried to get some money through you or someone tried to scam her!

87.3% of this pay for Job stuff Na Scam !

From federal bureau of statistics?

Ordinary ministry job 500k no go solve talkless of NNPC

Abeg remain smart. Use the money and farm in the outskirts of abuja. Think about yourself, kids and oga, simple

Biglittlelois:
So she should tell her husband that his sister wants to scam him by using her right? Did you read the end part of her write up at all?

yes she should

That your SIL dey bomb local.
Why she nor go international if she smart and top notch?