₦airaland Forum

I have a friend who has everything going on well for him,he provides for the house and take very good care of his wife,even go an extra miles sometimes to make sure his wife does not lack anything. But events turn around when the guy lost his job and things becomes very difficult for the man.
But the wife his working, suddenly the wife stop cooking for the man and said the man should be doing his cooking, later on because of the covid 19 issue, there one of less down 2hrs can't go to K.G. the man took over too. And now for more than 4months now the man is the one cleaning the house, cooking, washing dishes, and bathing with feeding there son, and the wife will just go to work and come back eat from the man's cooked food and then go to bed and start pressing her fone.
But she makes sure that there is food in the house and food for there son to eat.
All effort to talk to her has proved abortive. Even her Pastor and some relations have step in and still no change she always capitalise on the fact that she goes out to prove food for the family. That her husband his not even appreciative enough. So she didn't see anything wrong in all what the husband is doing in the house
Please what should my friend do?
Please this is a serious issue. Please

Tomorrow she will run to social media platform(s)and be ranting "after suffering with him,provided for him,today he is rich and calling for divorce".

Baba, if the woman is gainfully employed and doesnt run her mouth, why not?

This life no balance at all, man must survive.

Since the man did well when he had, why is the wife doing nonsense It's not an excuse for her not to take good care or do the house works. The man might understand or endure but she is just going too far! What if he gets another better job tommorow?

So my friend should stay

Baiser:
Baba, if the woman is gainfully employed and doesnt run her mouth, why not?

This life no balance at all, man must survive.

People of God, FEAR WOMEN!!!!!

Let's hear the woman side of the story

He lost his job and she made him a salve.
That's just so wrong.

A man shouldn't live like that. He ought to be the leader, not the one bending the knee to be feed.

Bola146:
Since the man did well when he had, why is the wife doing nonsense It's not an excuse for her not to take good care or do the house works. The man might understand or endure but she is just going too far! What if he gets another better job tommorow?

You people get on my last nerve, so the husband is supposed to sit on his lazy ass all day and contribute nothing while the wife goes to work, come home and do all the house chores, cook, and take care of the child? You guys need better home training, you are too damn spoiled. You don't even care if your wife is exhausted. Pathetic.

Wait, do you guys feel this way because the wife is bought and paid for like a slave?

Should a woman abandon her primary duty just because she is the one bringing the money

khia:
You people get on my last nerve, so the husband is supposed to sit on his lazy ass all day and contribute nothing while the wife goes to work, come home and do all the house chores, cook, and take care of the child? You guys need better home training, you are too damn spoiled. You don't ever care if your wife is exhausted. Pathetic.

Wait, do you guys feel this way because the wife is bought and paid for like a slave?

And apart from House Chores, what has your friend being doing?

Has he been looking for job, running a business or just sitting at home doing nothing?

Or he just want to sit at home all day without doing anything?


Also, all those Friends, family members and Pastors that have tried settling the issue, how have they helped the man financially so far? Have they referred him for a job, gave him money to start a business? Or all they do is just try to talk to the woman?

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In all, mind your business and leave the man alone with his family.

If any of you really want to help him, then you should be more worried about getting him back up financially than about him doing house chores.

The root of the entire problem is him going broke, and nothing will change until he take back his role as the breadwinner of the family.

All this noise and blackmail won't change a thing. If you're really concerned, help him start up a business OR get him a job!

---

And that's if this story is true, because it looks fake to me.

Le124:
Should a woman abandon her primary duty just because she is the one bringing the money

Should the man sit on his lazy ass and not contribute anything to the marriage because he lost his job? The wife is now busting her ass outside of the home to hold things together until the husband can get back on his feet. He should be making sure the home is in order while he is there. Do something to contribute and show appreciation damn it.

clearly a man who has lost his focus if he just prefered being a house husband..except if he lost his job then he can help out for the meantime

Also, except you've been living with them all along, you can't say he goes extra miles for his wife.

From your write up, it's easy to deduce the woman already has a job before the man lost his, because you don't expect me to believe she got a job immediately the man stopped working, so she have the capacity to do some things for herself.

And during those times, she does house chores and take care of the baby according to your story.

But now, he's probably staying at home full time.


So, like I said in my previous comment, get your friend a Job, and things will most likely sort itself out because the woman will have no excuse for her current behaviour.

Le124:
But she makes sure that there is food in the house and food for there son to eat.
All effort to talk to her has proved abortive. Even her Pastor and some relations have step in and still no change she always capitalise on the fact that she goes out to prove food for the family. That her husband his not even appreciative enough. So she didn't see anything wrong in all what the husband is doing in the house
Please what should my friend do?
Please this is a serious issue. Please

In nigeria marriage na stress..thats why most ppl who die of high BP in naija are mostly married couples than single couples

I don't see anything wrong here except your ego is too large. She is providing while he does the chores and other things; this is just how it is in a traditional household with genders switched.

If the guy was assisting in the house chores while he provided 100% in the past, I could understand the mild betrayal of his wife going fully traditional on him now that the tables have turned. That is why you must swallow the red pill. Your wife, including all women, won't cut you any slack when they are in charge and you depend on them no matter what you have done for them in the past. For every penny she spends providing, she must get it back from the husband in form of the traditional roles of a wife (that's the best she can do now). She won't cut him some slack. It doesn't matter if he pampered her and never demanded traditional roles from her. Even if he says "taking care of the kids is too stressful," as many women do to cunningly avoid the responsibility of doing house chores alone and make their beta simp husbands assist them in the chores, his wife won't be having any of that.

This is why I shake my head at the beta provider men that help their wives wash plates and shout "your wives is not a slave." They don't know the pepper, slavery and disrespect that are coming to them from their wives when they go broke and their wives are financially in charge. I won't be surprised if the woman is keeping late nights and openly playing with other men to the knowledge of the husband. Let's not even talk about the disrespect and rude attitude (especially in the way she talks to him). Let's not talk about the resentment she will have at "broke useless husband," and the sexless nights.

OP, tell your friend to carry his cross and try to get his money up. You can't expect a woman (or man) to provide 100% and do the chores when the other person is there. Finally, hope that a higher bidder doesn't come along because she will monkey branch and take the kids. It pays to take the red pill.

^{NB: I am being objective here. I don't want to sugarcoat anything. Try not to bring your emotions into this.}

Both of them has a job before getting marry, when I said he goes extra mile for, I know what am talking about. His even in debt because of somethings he did for his wife

Ayemileto:
Also, except you've been living with them all along, you can't say he goes extra miles for his wife.

From your write up, it's easy to deduce the woman already has a job before the man lost his, because you don't expect me to believe she got a job immediately the man stopped working, so she have the capacity to do some things for herself.

And during those times, she does house chores and take care of the baby according to your story.

But now, he's probably staying at home full time.


So, like I said in my previous comment, get your friend a Job, and things will most likely sort itself out because the woman will have no excuse for her current behaviour.

Le124:
I have a friend who has everything going on well for him,he provides for the house and take very good care of his wife,even go an extra miles sometimes to make sure his wife does not lack anything. But events turn around when the guy lost his job and things becomes very difficult for the man.
But the wife his working, suddenly the wife stop cooking for the man and said the man should be doing his cooking, later on because of the covid 19 issue, there one of less down 2hrs can't go to K.G. the man took over too. And now for more than 4months now the man is the one cleaning the house, cooking, washing dishes, and bathing with feeding there son, and the wife will just go to work and come back eat from the man's cooked food and then go to bed and start pressing her fone.
But she makes sure that there is food in the house and food for there son to eat.
All effort to talk to her has proved abortive. Even her Pastor and some relations have step in and still no change she always capitalise on the fact that she goes out to prove food for the family. That her husband his not even appreciative enough. So she didn't see anything wrong in all what the husband is doing in the house
Please what should my friend do?
Please this is a serious issue. Please

Do you still expect the wife to do all the housework after she gets back from work in the evening?

Bola146:
Since the man did well when he had, why is the wife doing nonsense It's not an excuse for her not to take good care or do the house works. The man might understand or endure but she is just going too far! What if he gets another better job tommorow?

When the husband worked outside of the home the wife took care of the home, now the wife has to do his job snd provide for the family, he should contribute to the house keep. Marriage is.a partnership, not a slave and master relationship. The wife is.human,.she.gets tired.

Why do your women raise such spoiled, lazy, entitled men? It starts with mothers, raise better men. I bet they expect her to give him her paycheck as well.

Bola146:
Since the man did well when he had, why is the wife doing nonsense It's not an excuse for her not to take good care or do the house works. The man might understand or endure but she is just going too far! What if he gets another better job tommorow?

When the husband worked outside of the home the wife took care of the home, now the wife has to do his job and provide for the family, he should contribute to the house keep. Marriage is.a partnership, not a slave and master relationship. The wife is.human, she gets tired.

Why do the women raise such spoiled, lazy, entitled men? It starts with mothers, raise better men.

Le124:
Should a woman abandon her primary duty just because she is the one bringing the money

The objective of the couple now should be to secure the wife's job and if that means having the husband do house chores I see nothing wrong in that!

Thanks, getting back on his fit is what we have been working on

Martinez39s:
I don't see anything wrong here except your ego is too large. She is providing while he does the chores and other things, this is just how it is in a traditional household where the man is the head and provider.

If the guy was assisting in the house chores while he provided 100% in the past, I could understand the mild betrayal of his wife going fully traditional on him now that the tables have turned. That is why you must swallow the red pill. Your wife, including all women, won't cut you any slack when they are in charge and you depend on them no matter what you have done for them in the past. For every penny she spends providing, she must get it back from the husband in form of the traditional roles of a wife (that's the best she can do now). She won't cut him some slack. It doesn't matter if he pampered her and never demanded traditional roles from her. Even if he says "taking care of the kids is too stressful," as many women do to cunningly avoid the responsibility of doing house chores alone and make their beta simp husbands assist them in the chores, his wife won't be having any of that.

This is why I shake my head at the beta provider men that help their wives wash plates and shout "your wives is not a slave." They don't know the pepper, slavery and disrespect that are coming to them from their wives when they go broke and their wives are financially in charge. I won't be surprised if the woman is keeping late nights and openly playing with other men to the knowledge of the husband. Let's not even talk about the disrespect and rude attitude (especially in the way she talks to him). Let's not talk about the resentment she will have at "broke useless husband," and the sexless nights.

OP, tell your friend to carry his cross and try to get his money up. You can't expect a woman (or man) to provide 100% and do the chores when the other person is there. Finally, hope that a higher bidder doesn't come along because she will monkey branch and take the kids. It pays to take the red pill.

^{NB: I am being objective here. I don't want to sugarcoat anything. Try not to bring your emotions into this.}

They switched roles.... Lol.

But the wife shouldn't push it all on the man nah.

Le124:
Thanks, getting back on his fit is what we have been working on

Good. Getting back on his feet is what he needs.

Southern Nigeria can complain fa ...

Martinez39s:
I don't see anything wrong here except your ego is too large. She is providing while he does the chores and other things, this is just how it is in a traditional household where the man is the head and provider.

If the guy was assisting in the house chores while he provided 100% in the past, I could understand the mild betrayal of his wife going fully traditional on him now that the tables have turned. That is why you must swallow the red pill. Your wife, including all women, won't cut you any slack when they are in charge and you depend on them no matter what you have done for them in the past. For every penny she spends providing, she must get it back from the husband in form of the traditional roles of a wife (that's the best she can do now). She won't cut him some slack. It doesn't matter if he pampered her and never demanded traditional roles from her. Even if he says "taking care of the kids is too stressful," as many women do to cunningly avoid the responsibility of doing house chores alone and make their beta simp husbands assist them in the chores, his wife won't be having any of that.

This is why I shake my head at the beta provider men that help their wives wash plates and shout "your wives is not a slave." They don't know the pepper, slavery and disrespect that are coming to them from their wives when they go broke and their wives are financially in charge. I won't be surprised if the woman is keeping late nights and openly playing with other men to the knowledge of the husband. Let's not even talk about the disrespect and rude attitude (especially in the way she talks to him). Let's not talk about the resentment she will have at "broke useless husband," and the sexless nights.

OP, tell your friend to carry his cross and try to get his money up. You can't expect a woman (or man) to provide 100% and do the chores when the other person is there. Finally, hope that a higher bidder doesn't come along because she will monkey branch and take the kids. It pays to take the red pill.

^{NB: I am being objective here. I don't want to sugarcoat anything. Try not to bring your emotions into this.}

I like how you were objective with this comment.

Martinez39s:
I don't see anything wrong here except your ego is too large. She is providing while he does the chores and other things, this is just how it is in a traditional household where the man is the head and provider.

If the guy was assisting in the house chores while he provided 100% in the past, I could understand the mild betrayal of his wife going fully traditional on him now that the tables have turned. That is why you must swallow the red pill. Your wife, including all women, won't cut you any slack when they are in charge and you depend on them no matter what you have done for them in the past. For every penny she spends providing, she must get it back from the husband in form of the traditional roles of a wife (that's the best she can do now). She won't cut him some slack. It doesn't matter if he pampered her and never demanded traditional roles from her. Even if he says "taking care of the kids is too stressful," as many women do to cunningly avoid the responsibility of doing house chores alone and make their beta simp husbands assist them in the chores, his wife won't be having any of that.

This is why I shake my head at the beta provider men that help their wives wash plates and shout "your wives is not a slave." They don't know the pepper, slavery and disrespect that are coming to them from their wives when they go broke and their wives are financially in charge. I won't be surprised if the woman is keeping late nights and openly playing with other men to the knowledge of the husband. Let's not even talk about the disrespect and rude attitude (especially in the way she talks to him). Let's not talk about the resentment she will have at "broke useless husband," and the sexless nights.

OP, tell your friend to carry his cross and try to get his money up. You can't expect a woman (or man) to provide 100% and do the chores when the other person is there. Finally, hope that a higher bidder doesn't come along because she will monkey branch and take the kids. It pays to take the red pill.

^{NB: I am being objective here. I don't want to sugarcoat anything. Try not to bring your emotions into this.}

Who hacked your account Martinez ?

MAN: (provides 100% and expects full traditional roles from wife)
WOMEN, MALE FEMINISTS, BLUE PILL SIMPS:
a) "that's toxic,"
b) "your wife is not your slave or maid,"
c) "taking care of the kids is too difficult for her, assist in the house chores,"
d) "typically African man, so domineering and backward,"
e) "toxic masculinity" etc.

---

WOMAN: (provides 100% and expects full traditional roles from man)
WOMEN, MALE FEMINISTS, BLUE PILL SIMPS:
a) (screeching silence and possibly mild laughter)
b) "Haba! How can you expect her to go through the stress of providing and assist in the chores? the man should do something nah"
c) "A man is supposed to provide" (even though they don't want gender roles defined for women, and they support equality)
d) add yours.


#UnaDeyMad #MenDonSuffer #ItPaysToTakeTheRedpill

Ariza:
They switched roles.... Lol.

But the wife shouldn't push it all on the man nah.

So the man should push it all on the woman, you aren't making any sense? It's a partnership that should be shared.

What stress are you even talking about here, she goes to her place of work that she has been going long before they got married. And she still do her house work has a single lady ,so why can't she take some responsibility as a woman should. Is that too much to ask

khia:
So the man should push it all on the woman, you aren't making any sense? It's a partnership that should be shared.

Ariza:
Who hacked your account Martinez ?

Lol. I try to be 100% logical and leave emotions out. I am never emotional invested in any discussion on this forum. You probably thought I would come here to start a gender war and demonize the wife and all women. Nah!

Btw, can you remind me who is the "king of logical counter..."? Be like say I don forget.

khia:
So the man should push it all on the woman, you aren't making any sense? It's a partnership that should be shared.

Are you on your period? Looks like something someone with cramps will type.

So handing a four months baby to the Man to care for makes sense? Please get lost already!