How Guys Use Marriage To Plunge Themselves Into Perpetual Poverty. - Family (8)

Welcome, Guest: Register On Nairaland / LOGIN! / Trending / Recent / New
Stats: 3,165,776 members, 7,862,554 topics. Date: Sunday, 16 June 2024 at 07:24 PM

How Guys Use Marriage To Plunge Themselves Into Perpetual Poverty. - Family (8) - Nairaland

Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Family / How Guys Use Marriage To Plunge Themselves Into Perpetual Poverty. (74927 Views)

What Is The Benefit Of Marriage To A Man in this present time? / Suitors Now Prefer Our Maids For Marriage To Our Daughters / Jos Bride Electrocuted Days To Her Marriage To Two-Time Fiancé (2) (3) (4)

(1) (2) (3) ... (5) (6) (7) (8) (9) (10) (11) ... (18) (Reply) (Go Down)

Re: How Guys Use Marriage To Plunge Themselves Into Perpetual Poverty. by Nobody: 1:13pm On Jul 21, 2020

My brother don’t ever wonder how a poor fellow gets erection.

The Penis is the most irrational and illiterate part of the human body, always standing when it should sit or even lay flat.

That’s why Poor Man = 12 Children and Rich Man = 3 Children.

Free Toto and cheap alcohol is the only pleasure a poor man can afford.

6 Likes 1 Share

Re: How Guys Use Marriage To Plunge Themselves Into Perpetual Poverty. by Nobody: 1:14pm On Jul 21, 2020

seguno2:

As we have found out with the pretentious rogues in APC led by Bubu

Eggxactily

2 Likes 1 Share

Re: How Guys Use Marriage To Plunge Themselves Into Perpetual Poverty. by Nobody: 1:14pm On Jul 21, 2020

viceddy95:

Is that the reason you are still single and senseless?if you don't have anything meaningful to write, keep quiet and be reading comments,is not important you write nonsense as comment and be displaying your stupidity...

Gbas gbos

Re: How Guys Use Marriage To Plunge Themselves Into Perpetual Poverty. by seguno2: 1:15pm On Jul 21, 2020

merieam16:
Okay buh d truth is d poor will always b among u. at least u helped out dat wat matters

You can choose 2 remain poor by nt doubling ur hustle buh der some people hustle or no hustle dey er destined 2 b poor.Not everytime u see a poor person nd u say he or she is lazy or hasnt taken steps buh time nd chance happen 2 dem all. They will still av 2 get married nd do wat oda people do cos dey are still humans

ti o ban ri se, ma se pe padi e lo lè

What terrible philosophy that glorifies poverty is this?
Societies work to NOT have many poor people, but you are talking about the poor will always be with us? What nonsense

6 Likes

Re: How Guys Use Marriage To Plunge Themselves Into Perpetual Poverty. by Ademoore07(m): 1:16pm On Jul 21, 2020

Nice write up, man. I hope to share my story on this platform. What i passed through before making it despite calls for me to get married by fire by force.

4 Likes

Re: How Guys Use Marriage To Plunge Themselves Into Perpetual Poverty. by Musty112: 1:17pm On Jul 21, 2020

17.31. Do not kill your children for fear of poverty; it is We Who provide for them as well as for you. Killing them is surely a grave sin.
Marriage is never a reason for poverty. Just use your brain, u might not be rich but you will be mildly comfortable in the least. The God that created you has created what you will eat until ur death. That guy could use that same energy to find menial things to do

Re: How Guys Use Marriage To Plunge Themselves Into Perpetual Poverty. by pocohantas(f): 1:17pm On Jul 21, 2020

Klass99:

This is so on point.

Just give them time, they’ll say the same thing you have been saying. However, it won’t be emotions or feminism- it will be hardcore logic this time. grin

3 Likes

Re: How Guys Use Marriage To Plunge Themselves Into Perpetual Poverty. by Nobody: 1:18pm On Jul 21, 2020

Poseidon000:
Sup guys. I've something that have always earned the acme of my discountenance. And that's how men crudely jump into marriage in other to conform to societal dictate or for some selfish satisfaction.
This have gotten me pensive and I'll make no ado in getting to the nucleus of the issue.

Yesterday, I was headed toward gwarimpa, and on my way I noticed a disheveled young guy around Efab estate trekking by the express.
As a rule, I always give such guys 'lift,' because i was once with a female colleague in a lonely path that seldom have cars coming our way, suddenly one private car stopped and when I tried entering after my female colleague boarded, the SIMPson bounced me out and zoomed off with an empty back seat.

That incident birthed in me a sense of solidarity and understanding of what men go through just for being men, but yesterday, I was so incensed by a botch job my mechanic did that I drove past. After about 4 hours when I had everything sorted and was heading back, I saw the same guy heading toward my direction again(it's a dual carriage way) and he was sweating profusely, so I beckoned on him to enter. We got talking and I inquired why he's trekking such a long distance. He said: he went to look for a job that wasn't successful and he's going back to Arab road.
But this is just a miniscule of the guy's travail. He grew up in abject poverty.In fact, they gave birth to him and his sister in an uncompleted building. His dad died in that building, his sister got pregnant for some riffraff and they started what we call "abuja marriage", his mom subsequently fell sick and died in the same uncompleted building. Then the owner of the building decided to complete it, and drove him away.

Now, this guy was able to get another uncompleted building to stay, and as I'm typing this, he's with wife and kids. This is a person that don't have food at home and can not afford N150 to and fro.

I gave him 10k but I was so mad with him; I mean, I was disconcertingly appalled that this guy will think of marriage in his privation. Why not be a little bit comfortable before considering marriage, instead to face life with the dignity of a breadline.

Sadly, this is the same mistake lot of guy's have been making thinking they'll fall into some stupendous money as soon as they marry, and this is mostly perpetuated by religious charlatans who say; a man's destiny is predicated on his future wife, that as soon as he gets married, the special blessing tied to marriage will start opening way for him.

That's a mendacious twaddle that will leave you in a precarious situation. Please guys, have 'comfort' afoot before you dabble into marriage.

What's your take on this?

What's the point of the "big" words which hardly fit into the sentences and completely detract from the several points you are trying to make? To sound educated? Failed woefully! If you want to use "big" words, at least you should know what you are doing. Couldn't even read your write-up.

7 Likes

Re: How Guys Use Marriage To Plunge Themselves Into Perpetual Poverty. by pocohantas(f): 1:19pm On Jul 21, 2020

jornwhite:

As for the ladies telling guyz what to do, if they had thinking faculty ... they would av known such advice is unnecessary ... how many guyz are even ready to propose, can't even rmember d last time i attended a wedding
Poco is almost 36 n still single, n she thinks she is in d right position to tell men to be stable b4 marriage ... when are life is an affirmation already

38 actually, but then, my mum is in her 40s and I am not even the first child. I hope that makes you sleep better this night.

Nah, the wait doesn’t have to be long. That is why we have so many tales of how some ex left you all and married 3weeks later.

I know that was a bitter pill to swallow. Use ChiExotic to push it down. Cutie kiss

4 Likes

Re: How Guys Use Marriage To Plunge Themselves Into Perpetual Poverty. by chiol: 1:19pm On Jul 21, 2020

Freeeanijor:
Change your mind set, it's not always the case. Many people who had this believe always fall into depression because of disappointment and eventually curse and die. Don't set yourself up for that but plan your future without depending on anyone.

My advice was for those between 30 and 40 years with sources of income. For you, don't marry, continue planning till you retire. Wait until you have billions in your account.

We are still in Nigeria. If you like, continue behaving like the whites. Their countries have plans for them at old age, whether they have children or not but your country has no plans for you. Get a family and train your children well.

Re: How Guys Use Marriage To Plunge Themselves Into Perpetual Poverty. by Nobody: 1:20pm On Jul 21, 2020

Purplekush:
Mind how you give strangers lifts. A real niggarr with a .9mm or a Berretta could change the ownership of that ride without signing papers

Poseidon000
Take this advice seriously. Although there are pure hearted people in genuine need, a good number also specialize in biting the fingers that fed them, repaying evil for good and general envy. I would advocate anonymous help/ helping from afar. Someone very close to me had a very ugly experience helping others and he is yet to recover. People get killed by people they give money to frequently.

4 Likes

Re: How Guys Use Marriage To Plunge Themselves Into Perpetual Poverty. by SeriouslySense(m): 1:21pm On Jul 21, 2020

hmm

Purplekush:
Mind how you give strangers lifts. A real niggarr with a .9mm or a Berretta could change the ownership of that ride without signing papers

Re: How Guys Use Marriage To Plunge Themselves Into Perpetual Poverty. by ledaman: 1:21pm On Jul 21, 2020

francesco01:

You mumu oo. Must you bring religion into this?. Does the topic or the situation applies only to Christain?. Why must you quote the Bible?. And this practices is rampant among you Mumuslims, especially the Northern part of this failed country. Your god "Mohammed too, during his lifetime,he impregnated a lotta young and underage girls while leaving in poverty, before he was sent back into the pit of hell, which is where his followers too will be heading too, sooner or later. If we check you now, na one yeye and mumu man marry you put for house. Both of you will be totally useless to your families, nothing to show at all .Nonsense and ingredients.

Who mumu pass amongst you now?attacking Another religion just educate the lady not attacking Islam.

Re: How Guys Use Marriage To Plunge Themselves Into Perpetual Poverty. by Chris525: 1:22pm On Jul 21, 2020

How is marriage responsible for his predicament? Even marriage is a victim here.

Whether you marry with 1bn or 1k, anyone could still lick the dust when life pops.

His orientation/mentality needs to change, thats all.

Re: How Guys Use Marriage To Plunge Themselves Into Perpetual Poverty. by Asour: 1:24pm On Jul 21, 2020

Purplekush:
Mind how you give strangers lifts. A real niggarr with a .9mm or a Berretta could change the ownership of that ride without signing papers

True. But then again real robbers don't need to be given lift to disposses people of their things.

Re: How Guys Use Marriage To Plunge Themselves Into Perpetual Poverty. by Nobody: 1:25pm On Jul 21, 2020

SarkinYarki:

Marriage and child bearing is the greatest dream killer and vehicle for generational poverty in the world but people don't know

Re: How Guys Use Marriage To Plunge Themselves Into Perpetual Poverty. by Nobody: 1:27pm On Jul 21, 2020

I feel you.

as it is often the case, people cave under under societal pressures and expectations. it's sad but also an indictment on the our personal resolve or lack thereof.

personally, I'd never think of getting hooked with a person until I can take care of myself, a wife and a child.

talking about a child, the problem extends into childbearing because you see people, already strained financially by marriage, going on to have multiple kids ranging from three to five.

that's stupid and ultimately selfish because your inability to care for your wards would take its toll on the society i.e crime, homelessness, dwarfed human capital etc.

while we're at this, I should mention that sometimes the unfortunate situation of losing one's means of livelihood after marriage may occur and there's really not a lot of ways to handle that situation to a positive outcome.

as such, while married, even when comfortable, keep a fair margin of error for exigencies i.e don't take on too many responsibilities (i.e children) that would hamper your savings for the rainy day.

if earning a decent 100K monthly, there's really no reason to do more than a kid.

many of us didn't come from much; we had little growing up but with good planning in marriage, we can have one or two kids and provide comfortable care for them (decent schools, money for self-development in gaining skills etc).

don't play yourself - marriage doesn't come with pre-installed financial bliss.

if you must get married from little, do but don't strain your little by assuming responsibilities for selfish and self-obsessive reasons of wanting to be parents like everyone else.

if you find a wife earning 50K, get married but you don't have to bear kids immediately - save for two year towards childbearing and until you see a significant surge in your income, don't have another kid.

STOP AT TWO WHEN YOU GET AN INCREASE IN WAGES.

be responsible; give birth to kids you can care for - don't leave everything to chance and providence.

with little money, you can have a fine marriage as long as you don't take on more than you can manage.

15 Likes 5 Shares

Re: How Guys Use Marriage To Plunge Themselves Into Perpetual Poverty. by Nobody: 1:28pm On Jul 21, 2020

pafo:
The only thing i noticed drom this thread is that that "righteous" dude had nothing of importance to say here and didn't book space. I can bet you his life is quite miserable from the nonsense being spread by the Hebrew book he preaches about so often.

Stop derailing this thread!

Re: How Guys Use Marriage To Plunge Themselves Into Perpetual Poverty. by jaxxy(m): 1:28pm On Jul 21, 2020

Lol longthing and 2 much talk. It takes 2 to tango and 2 broke ass people can’t get married unless u both have a plan to sustain urselves within ur level of comfort or hardship as the case may be.

1 Like

Re: How Guys Use Marriage To Plunge Themselves Into Perpetual Poverty. by OhiOfIhima: 1:29pm On Jul 21, 2020

Thanks alot guy.... Many people believed been married will give ways for success and co.

Many of us experience this societal unbalanced, I always look back n see those who were on factory job and took wife many years ago, when d company fold up or staff laid off, it wasn't funny for them.

That make me to take lots of precautionary measure b4 man dig in..

May God help us all.. Amiin

2 Likes

Re: How Guys Use Marriage To Plunge Themselves Into Perpetual Poverty. by dangoteinlaw: 1:29pm On Jul 21, 2020

chinchonglee:
Dnt mind dem...

The "grow together" crew will come for you

lmao @ "grow together" We know them nah, they are so bitter whenever they see good things online, they are on nairaland coz they can't afford instagram. They see evey rich ppl as the cause of their misfortune. Societal pressure has dumped so many youths with good potentials tha could have made this country great and now their life's done. Their achievements is their kids only and the future of this country has been prosponeed to another 3decades in darkness. Nigeria youths need overall enlightenment, they should take this country away from the old leaders and build it but how can they do that when by the age they suppose to take their studies seriously they start chasing what's bot chasing them.

7 Likes

Re: How Guys Use Marriage To Plunge Themselves Into Perpetual Poverty. by Nobody: 1:30pm On Jul 21, 2020

ComeAndobo:

True, but it seems counterintuitive to me how someone can be so good with words and continue to make simple grammatical errors like using "have" instead of "has".

He isn't good with words. Don't be deceived. This is your usual Nigerian who believes throwing "big" words about should make him sound educated. The words hardly made any sense in the context they were used.

9 Likes

Re: How Guys Use Marriage To Plunge Themselves Into Perpetual Poverty. by Coolcalmcollect(m): 1:30pm On Jul 21, 2020

Poseidon000:
Sup guys. I've something that have always earned the acme of my discountenance. And that's how men crudely jump into marriage in other to conform to societal dictate or for some selfish satisfaction.
This have gotten me pensive and I'll make no ado in getting to the nucleus of the issue.

Yesterday, I was headed toward gwarimpa, and on my way I noticed a disheveled young guy around Efab estate trekking by the express.
As a rule, I always give such guys 'lift,' because i was once with a female colleague in a lonely path that seldom have cars coming our way, suddenly one private car stopped and when I tried entering after my female colleague boarded, the SIMPson bounced me out and zoomed off with an empty back seat.

That incident birthed in me a sense of solidarity and understanding of what men go through just for being men, but yesterday, I was so incensed by a botch job my mechanic did that I drove past. After about 4 hours when I had everything sorted and was heading back, I saw the same guy heading toward my direction again(it's a dual carriage way) and he was sweating profusely, so I beckoned on him to enter. We got talking and I inquired why he's trekking such a long distance. He said: he went to look for a job that wasn't successful and he's going back to Arab road.
But this is just a miniscule of the guy's travail. He grew up in abject poverty.In fact, they gave birth to him and his sister in an uncompleted building. His dad died in that building, his sister got pregnant for some riffraff and they started what we call "abuja marriage", his mom subsequently fell sick and died in the same uncompleted building. Then the owner of the building decided to complete it, and drove him away.

Now, this guy was able to get another uncompleted building to stay, and as I'm typing this, he's with wife and kids. This is a person that don't have food at home and can not afford N150 to and fro.

I gave him 10k but I was so mad with him; I mean, I was disconcertingly appalled that this guy will think of marriage in his privation. Why not be a little bit comfortable before considering marriage, instead to face life with the dignity of a breadline.

Sadly, this is the same mistake lot of guy's have been making thinking they'll fall into some stupendous money as soon as they marry, and this is mostly perpetuated by religious charlatans who say; a man's destiny is predicated on his future wife, that as soon as he gets married, the special blessing tied to marriage will start opening way for him.

That's a mendacious twaddle that will leave you in a precarious situation. Please guys, have 'comfort' afoot before you dabble into marriage.

What's your take on this?

so you gave a guy you gave a lift 10k cos of some sob story... smh maga, you've been scammed ..... he told me same sob story but have him 100

Re: How Guys Use Marriage To Plunge Themselves Into Perpetual Poverty. by ledaman: 1:30pm On Jul 21, 2020

Different strokes for different folks! Marriage is a blessing but having nothing to feed ur family with it would amount to Mega disaster. What about people that has something doing and were sacked along the line, will you say they didn't plan? or people that has nothing but they were favoured by His grace with wonderful job along the line, it takes the Grace of Almighty God to be successful in life but as a man you must have a blueprint of what you what in life.

Re: How Guys Use Marriage To Plunge Themselves Into Perpetual Poverty. by olajonzin(m): 1:31pm On Jul 21, 2020

DAT remind me dat year I got a woman pregnant... though I was a little financial buoyant.. if I could remember ...I still 250k in my account... but I still believe i not have not arrive with DAT money I have in my account... cos I don't kwn what the future hold for me ...thank God the girl had to tell me DAT she does not want the baby...I don't what she use that got pregnancy terminated...DAT. .what got us separated...but...as time goes on ...I got broke...then I started begging for two hundred to feed...cos it was so down on me..so I wonder if she had keep baby then maybe ..I would be thinking of commiting suicide but..I thank God now

7 Likes

Re: How Guys Use Marriage To Plunge Themselves Into Perpetual Poverty. by dangoteinlaw: 1:31pm On Jul 21, 2020

kestolove95:
Don't blame them, they wia brainwashed by the lies in the Bible dat says "he who find a wife has found a good thing and obtain favour from the Lord" that is the favour his obtaining from d Lord now..

I swear one man was quoting that same thung behind me not long ago, i felt like punching him but i just turn on my airpod and looked elsewhere. Those airpods saved him.

1 Like

Re: How Guys Use Marriage To Plunge Themselves Into Perpetual Poverty. by Asour: 1:32pm On Jul 21, 2020

Prof0fficial:
"someone that wishes to be alone should remember his old age days"...

People that have families can be alone too.

One's family can also be lost too.

I know families that, well, aren't "bonded" most times.

And with the world of Virtualization, being alone is merely a matter of choice.

Re: How Guys Use Marriage To Plunge Themselves Into Perpetual Poverty. by Freeeanijor: 1:33pm On Jul 21, 2020

chiol:

My advice was for those between 30 and 40 years with sources of income. For you, don't marry, continue planning till you retire. Wait until you have billions in your account.

We are still in Nigeria. If you like, continue behaving like the whites. Their countries have plans for them at old age, whether they have children or not but your country has no plans for you. Get a family and train your children well.

The more reason you should plan your future to be the one of independent whether children or not. There's no guarantee that you will have children that will cater for you at old age no matter how much you invest in them.
When you have an independent mindset, you children will benefit more because you wouldn't be a burden to them.
Life happens, you don't know who will kick the bucket first.
Don't set yourself up for disappointment at old age. Develop an independent mindset.

10 Likes 1 Share

Re: How Guys Use Marriage To Plunge Themselves Into Perpetual Poverty. by OCHKESTINE(m): 1:34pm On Jul 21, 2020

Poseidon000:

Lol. Baba, when i was coming up as a lad. I had a clique with so much ambition. The brightest and most handsome among us jumped into marriage with nothing palpable to sustain him.

Now, he's a shadow of himself subsisting on the magnanimity of our group and the little he can muster for himself. When I look at him now, I begin to wonder if he's the same bright lad that earned our awe and we looked up to. The dude is looking like my father now. Quite painful, because he profligates also(not wise with money).

Planning is the key. You're on point, bro.

You have spoken well so far, but however, I'd like to state that "People are broke for lack of value creation or financial literacy " and not because of marriage!

When I was single, I lack money to do stuffs. I am married and never go broke. When I think of a need, the supply comes. One- because I believe in God to supply and Two- because I am hardworking.

So please, The guy u helped or your friend that is broke got their priorities wrong. Marriage has nothing to do with ur story.

1 Like 1 Share

Re: How Guys Use Marriage To Plunge Themselves Into Perpetual Poverty. by lisa286: 1:34pm On Jul 21, 2020

Poseidon000:
Sup guys. I've something that have always earned the acme of my discountenance. And that's how men crudely jump into marriage in other to conform to societal dictate or for some selfish satisfaction.
This have gotten me pensive and I'll make no ado in getting to the nucleus of the issue.

Yesterday, I was headed toward gwarimpa, and on my way I noticed a disheveled young guy around Efab estate trekking by the express.
As a rule, I always give such guys 'lift,' because i was once with a female colleague in a lonely path that seldom have cars coming our way, suddenly one private car stopped and when I tried entering after my female colleague boarded, the SIMPson bounced me out and zoomed off with an empty back seat.

That incident birthed in me a sense of solidarity and understanding of what men go through just for being men, but yesterday, I was so incensed by a botch job my mechanic did that I drove past. After about 4 hours when I had everything sorted and was heading back, I saw the same guy heading toward my direction again(it's a dual carriage way) and he was sweating profusely, so I beckoned on him to enter. We got talking and I inquired why he's trekking such a long distance. He said: he went to look for a job that wasn't successful and he's going back to Arab road.
But this is just a miniscule of the guy's travail. He grew up in abject poverty.In fact, they gave birth to him and his sister in an uncompleted building. His dad died in that building, his sister got pregnant for some riffraff and they started what we call "abuja marriage", his mom subsequently fell sick and died in the same uncompleted building. Then the owner of the building decided to complete it, and drove him away.

Now, this guy was able to get another uncompleted building to stay, and as I'm typing this, he's with wife and kids. This is a person that don't have food at home and can not afford N150 to and fro.

I gave him 10k but I was so mad with him; I mean, I was disconcertingly appalled that this guy will think of marriage in his privation. Why not be a little bit comfortable before considering marriage, instead to face life with the dignity of a breadline.

Sadly, this is the same mistake lot of guy's have been making thinking they'll fall into some stupendous money as soon as they marry, and this is mostly perpetuated by religious charlatans who say; a man's destiny is predicated on his future wife, that as soon as he gets married, the special blessing tied to marriage will start opening way for him.

That's a mendacious twaddle that will leave you in a precarious situation. Please guys, have 'comfort' afoot before you dabble into marriage.

What's your take on this?

You are right. There's no point getting married if you both do not have the means of supporting your kids...

However some churches will encourage such a marriage telling them that the young man will find favour from God as soon as he gets married.

Sadly we forget that there are principles to financial independence.

2 Likes 1 Share

(1) (2) (3) ... (5) (6) (7) (8) (9) (10) (11) ... (18) (Reply)

Germany-Based Nigerian Marries An Old Man, Sparks Reactions / Sa'adat Olajumoke Bakare: Missing Person Found (PHOTO) / Nigerian Lady Dies During Childbirth, Leaving Her White Hubby & Son Behind

(Go Up)

Sections: politics (1) business autos (1) jobs (1) career education (1) romance computers phones travel sports fashion health
religion celebs tv-movies music-radio literature webmasters programming techmarket

Links: (1) (2) (3) (4) (5) (6) (7) (8) (9) (10)

Nairaland - Copyright © 2005 - 2024 Oluwaseun Osewa. All rights reserved. See How To Advertise. 81
Disclaimer: Every Nairaland member is solely responsible for anything that he/she posts or uploads on Nairaland.