Acidosis:
Poverty is not the actual reason people birth many children. Illiteracy (ignorance) is. Arrogance is another. Well most illiterates are arrogant.

What's the population of literate Nigerians? How many Nigerians understand the concept of "safe period" for sex, contraceptives or family planning?

Illiteracy is why an unprepared man and woman will open their eyes and their private parts for unsafe sex even while they're not financially and mentally prepared for the kids.

And by the way, where are the so called Nigerians desiring countless children because children bring blessing? Never met anyone in my life with that mentality and, if at all people like that exist, they're still a few among the populated illiterates. The idea that people want kids for some futuristic purposes is no longer prevalent. That era died some 3 to 5 decades ago.

The basic truth is that majority of families with many kids today never planned for such. Ask any family man or woman with 5 or 6 kids today and wait for the true response. At least 2-3 just came by "mistake" -- ignorance.

Another significant proportion found themselves in that situation as a result of arrogance.

Now mix illiteracy with arrogance and you'll see a larger proportion of Nigerians doubting even the existence of HIV/AIDS, Hepatitis, and Covid-19. You would even see yourself taking so many senseless risk like engaging in unsafe sex with prost.itutes, not minding whether they're hepatitis- or hiv- positive.

In fact, some f00lish ediots believe they're experts of withdrawal methods, reason they go on having condom-less' sex at a time the woman is ovulating, yet they're not ready for kids and don't want to be babydaddies and babymamas. Really?

Google is free, yet they won't use but would rather sit back and believe that as soon as they hustle, do fraud, and make some money, their problems will cease to exist.

Almost nice comment.
The only missing part is the work that you have been doing with other people to educate and enlighten the many illiterates and arrogant people who are birthing children to make life unsafe for those who don’t enlighten them.

mrchineke:


SHUT THE HELL UP! Who told you the bible is the word of GOD?

You believe it does not make it the truth!

My prayer for you is that God should take away that which as darken your heart and may the light of God shine upon you before it becomes too late in Jesus name Amen

eniorisha:
It's always smooth & easy to say when u are privileged never to av been in their shoes. There are some things the op & his stalwarts got wrong in their various submission. Only d real victims will know how best to paint d picture.

When a guy is poor & unwelcoming to people, any girl dt accept to date or marry him will appear to him as though she is doing him a great favor. Need for Companionship doesnt respect status anyway.

U & your fellow theorists probably got it rousy due to your privileged background & well-enlightened exposure. Even gv some poor dudes without privileged & enlightened exposure, million of Naira to start up sth for themselves. Check back in few months, it is either d money remained locked in bank or fast spending it for consumption. Yet, most times it's not their fault, generational & subsisting poverty in their live has battered them so so deep.


Also, one of d theorist said one will be so happily married when there is money....as in eh!!!! Most jobless broke ass trekking couples are happily married eating their soaked garri in peace while many rich couples are having it so tough & rough in their marriages.


Finally, if u are truly humane, u are to pity those people not to mock nor condemn them.

Reminds me of a long time ago when we were having a conversation at work on what we would immediately do, if we got hold of N200m+; while everyone was talking about going to price an apartment immediately, or spending the weekend in a 5 star hotel, our office assistant's said 'I go go TFC, come chop well-well'. We were all stunned! 200m, and you go to TFC?! It was then it occurred to us that a lot of the things we took for granted were actually an aspiration for this guy. Suffice to say, we considered giving this guy money to treat himself to a sumptuous meal at TFC, but reconsidered when we realized he would just pocket the money.

donlystra:


My prayer for you is that God should take away that which as darken your heart and may the light of God shine upon you before it becomes too late in Jesus name Amen

Bro or Madam, please concentrate on saving yourself. I am happy (as you are) with my own beliefs.

harsysky:
Life is a risk. like a reader commented up there, time and chance happen to people whether you choose to up your game or you choose to marry when not buoyant. If I had not seen a poor man who rose to wealth , and a wealthy man who became poor, I would certainly think a man has 100% influence on how their lives go .

The overall advice would be to have a source of income before dabbling into marriage, then get other sources of income to complement whatever cometh. At all times, pray without ceasing because real wealth isn't made, it is inherited from anybody. Take a look at majority of those who are billionaires, you would agree with me that they never believed they would be what they are now. If we all understand the way things work in this world, which isn't possible, we will be able to predict the future.

Is there anyone who is a liability? No. it's a matter of meeting someone whom God has given the ability to unlock that passion in you. I have seen and learned a lot in just a lil amount of time. The most striking knowledge is to never , ever look down on anyone even if they are foolish. Just like the saying, " what doesn't kill one, makes one stronger". I'm stronger for all I have seen and learned. I go all the way opposite of what majority think is best because I have this sole belief that God is both the producer and director of what we are living on here--the earth. A lot of rules here and there to even make one think that following all the rules could make you live longer than Methuselah, but it is all wash.

Enjoy what ever time you have in this world, and never judge those you think you are better than. Never lean on your own understanding.

Reads exactly like what I'd write in my 'inspired' moments.

You're wise my son.

Franzinni:
And you don't know what situation he was at the point of marriage after all he was on his way back from a job interview or something ... So he is not vision less ...condition and situation happens to the best of us..it is when you are looking up you really see the ugliness of humanity looking down on you... Many mufukas commenting are commenting on a topic they know nothing about they just jerkoff to the thought that it is not them.

Well said.

binghamm:

He isn't good with words. Don't be deceived. This is your usual Nigerian who believes throwing "big" words about should make him sound educated. The words hardly made any sense in the context they were used.

Phoney no doubt. The 'I dashed him N10k' yada yada is a dead giveaway. We 'elders' wey get this kind lifestyle and understanding sef sabi as e dey go.

But we must sha comment because the topic is quite topical, pun unintended.

Hedonisco:

Reads exactly like what I'd write in my 'inspired' moments.
You're wise my son.

Thanks, Sir

mrchineke:


Bro or Madam, please concentrate on saving yourself. I am happy (as you are) with my own beliefs.

No more comment apart from this one, Jesus Love's you

Before u marry, make sure you have an established business that can stand the test of time.
Proverbs 24:27, New Living Translation
Develop your business first before building your house.
1 Timothy 5:8
But if anyone does not provide for his own, and especially for those of his household, he has denied the faith and is worse than an unbeliever.
.
Those people putting the blame on the bible, shame on you.

bioman:
Finally somebody is of the same opinion with me as regards marriage. Thank you for the piece. I was also victim of this car lift in my start-up years. Some men will pick the lady and leave me there. Just like you, I am on solidarity with my cars now that the story has changed. Lol

you wanna be a witness to the serenading of your female colleague

If the owner of the vehicle declined to agreeing to give you a lift, don't allow it bother you or take it to heart otherwise you will just end up spoiling your day.

Now your story has changed, u are now a vehicle owner

Bagehot:


Reminds me of a long time ago when we were having a conversation at work on what we would immediately do, if we got hold of N200m+; while everyone was talking about going to price an apartment immediately, or spending the weekend in a 5 star hotel, our office assistant's said 'I go go TFC, come chop well-well'. We were all stunned! 200m, and you go to TFC?! It was then it occurred to us that a lot of the things we took for granted were actually an aspiration for this guy. Suffice to say, we considered giving this guy money to treat himself to a sumptuous meal at TFC, but reconsidered when we realized he would just pocket the money.

Wow!

This post got me thinking really hard
Fast food that I take for granted
Is what someone is longing for
You guys should have given him the money for the food tho
Or at least sent him to buy the food
Then handing it over to him

Thanks for sharing the experience

Poseidon000:


If this is your idea of recrimination, then you suck at it. Just so we're clear; it's been eon I last had a relationship. I'm comfortable, but I presently don't have a woman friend not to talk of a wife, so, your postulation is balderdash.

Let me pretend to believe what you said about your brother: that your brother have a different story, does not mean it's the prevalent case. In fact, his case is miniscule on the scale of 1/10 as obtainable in our society. Now, no sensible man will predicate his future on the probability of 'one' against 'nine.' That's akin to looking for a needle in a haystack. Not that there's no needle in the haystack, but what are the odd of finding it.

* No, I'm not God, but even the Christian Bible says: "A man who can't provide for his family, is worse than an infidel."

Just so you know, marriage give you this hustling mindset to be on your toes.
The highlighted is one of the major lies I aforementioned.
Let's put it into perspective. If as a bachelor you earn 4k per day, then spend 1k for feeding and another 1k for miscellaneous, leaving you with 2k to save for future investment that will avail you the financial laxity to venture into other enterprise or expand existing one, thus increasing your earning power to say 10k per day. At this juncture, you're to a large extent impervious to the cost implication of running a family. So, it's fine.

Now, let's say you got married with an earning of the same 4k per day. Remember you were spending 2k as a bachelor and saving the remaining 2k for the future. What you'll discover as a married man, is that; 4k will be barely enough to service the family, leaving you on the path of stagnancy, cause you'll be feeding from hand to mouth with no savings to venture into new waters of financial promise. Basically, you'll be retrogressing with the rise in inflation and graduating family expenses. In no time, you'll be wizened with dejection and suffering, consequently embroiling the innocent children you sired, in your self inflicted debacle.


Nuff said.

God give you more wisdom, only a minute few see things this way. Once belle show na marriage straight.

harsysky:
Life is a risk. like a reader commented up there, time and chance happen to people whether you choose to up your game or you choose to marry when not buoyant. If I had not seen a poor man who rose to wealth , and a wealthy man who became poor, I would certainly think a man has 100% influence on how their lives go .

The overall advice would be to have a source of income before dabbling into marriage, then get other sources of income to complement whatever cometh. At all times, pray without ceasing because real wealth isn't made, it is inherited from anybody. Take a look at majority of those who are billionaires, you would agree with me that they never believed they would be what they are now. If we all understand the way things work in this world, which isn't possible, we will be able to predict the future.

Is there anyone who is a liability? No. it's a matter of meeting someone whom God has given the ability to unlock that passion in you. I have seen and learned a lot in just a lil amount of time. The most striking knowledge is to never , ever look down on anyone even if they are foolish. Just like the saying, " what doesn't kill one, makes one stronger". I'm stronger for all I have seen and learned. I go all the way opposite of what majority think is best because I have this sole belief that God is both the producer and director of what we are living on here--the earth. A lot of rules here and there to even make one think that following all the rules could make you live longer than Methuselah, but it is all wash.

Enjoy what ever time you have in this world, and never judge those you think you are better than. Never lean on your own understanding.

Brilliant...the only that diverse all other,s opinion up there,good job from you,and man is never the captain of his soul

merieam16:
Okay buh d truth is d poor will always b among u. at least u helped out dat wat matters

You can choose 2 remain poor by nt doubling ur hustle buh der some people hustle or no hustle dey er destined 2 b poor.Not everytime u see a poor person nd u say he or she is lazy or hasnt taken steps buh time nd chance happen 2 dem all. They will still av 2 get married nd do wat oda people do cos dey are still humans


ti o ban ri se, ma se pe padi e lo lè

I like your sense of opinion...that guy he helped can in turn help him tomorrow. Thats life for you