₦airaland Forum

Qatar2022:
Relocate them they need you around them and besides who will be looking after them if you relocate them?

My mother and sister will relocate too

leisuretym:
OP, ignore those saying you should bring their mother in if you don't want to regret.
You are stable and able to function and reasoning well because she's not there to give you headache, the moment she come to add her whahala, you job will suffer and more responsibility has come, no one will care for you like your mother, abi is your mother complaining? You don't need any woman in this economy, you already have 3boys, train them well and enjoy your life

For me, a stable mind and my peace of mind is most paramount, a woman palaver will ruin you, you already have enough kids.

Be alone and hustle hard to raise them well with help of your mother

Thank you

Yankee101:
Relocate all of them including your mother and sister to live with you and help you care for your kids

It’s cheaper to run one household and you can put your kids in good schools and watch them grow


You’ll bond and shape them into good humans with God’s help

Thank you

Jewessgratitud3:
So many discombobulated human beings here. The op made suggestions and asked a simple request to help him pick one, a lot of people who have not managed their homes well enough are just going off point telling him to reunite with his wife or send the children to his wife as if he didn't see the wife before making the request without her in the picture or what even made him send her away in the first place.

Is she that responsible and didn't fight for the custody of her children in the first place?

Op, if you know you're not yet chanced (because of your job) to look after them, still leave them there but if you know you will have time for them, then bring them in to stay with you. Make sure you give them quality time.
Don't mind those trying to give you relationship advice.

Thank you

Mindlog:
So wait till the court decides custody, visitations and provisions for the triplets before renting a 2 bedroom and parlour because renting it and their mother gets custody, will be unnecessary expenditure.

Thank you so much

Ulunne777:
None.
They need their mom and their sister.

Leave your pride and whatever the mother did to you and unite those triplets.

They need a family.yoi,their mom and 3 of them.

Their mother breaks the family because of greeds she abandoned them and to reconcile with her is a big no. I am waiting for her to report me to court 🙄 I will attend the court. if they grant her custody of the children and visitations rights for me no wahala I will release the boys to her and they will be unite with their sister. I will continue to do my duties as a father.

I am a single father of triplets only 2 are with me but we are not living together due to the nature of my job. My boys are in the village with my mother and sister. The house I rented for them the rent will be expiring in March. Please I need your help with these two options.

1. Should I relocate them with me in my base in March. Right now I am staying in a single self cont because I am alone. But if they have to relocate I will get a 2 bedroom and parlour. Money isn't a problem.

2. Or I should renew the rent and allow them to stay in the village.

I am confuse and I don't know which one is the best.

What option will be better please help me pick the right one for the sake of my boys

Hathor5:
And the mother doesn`t love them? She can bear the pain? And the boys that you love so much don`t deserve to feel their mother`s love?

A real mother doesn't abandoned her children no matter how hard the situations is. If she really cared she wouldn't have abandoned them in the first place. Her ashawo work in Lagos is not going well that's why she want all 3 children with her so she will be receiving a big sum of money from me every month for upkeep or else she won't be able to survive again in Lagos.

Foodqueen:
This story still de on after all these years.

Yes ooo she is looking for trouble.

LadyRosa2:
Yes!
Of she gets a very good lawyer,especially those hot head human rights/family lawyers, she gets ALL the kids. You will have visitation rights and will be paying for their upkeep.

If I'm in her shoes, my lawyer would have handed me those kids since.

She abandoned them with me because I wasn't financially buoyant .

My x wife and I share 3 children together ( 4 years old triplets 2 boys 1 girl). I live in another state due to the nature of my job.

The girl lives with her in Lagos and the boys are with my mother and sister in the village. I rented another apartment for them far away because I don't want my x or her family to come and kidnapped my boys the same way she kidnapped the girl .

My x wife and daughter are going to the village for xmas she want me to give her my mum adress so she can see the boys she said she bought plenty gifts for them .

I refused because the last time she visited she took all 3 children to her parents house only for her to kidnapped the girl leaving behind the boys.

I don't want her to kidnapped my boys and she has threatened to take me to court for custody she said the judge will grant her custody because the children are tender .

I told her to go ahead and report me anywhere she wants. I am scared to loose my boys. I love them so much they are my everything I won't bear to lose them.

My boys are only 4 years old is it true that the judge will grant her custody because they are tender ?


Edited 1 : https://www.nairaland.com/7112098/x-wife-demanding-me-more#112551530



Edited 2: https://www.nairaland.com/7436944/ex-wife-kidnapped-daughter#118450454

Senioreddy:
Congratulations sir
It's a thing of joy to hear that you now have what can cater for your family. It's not easy.

Thank you

stevestifler:
Congratulations

I have been following all your stories and have learnt alot about marriages from you.

May you get an even better job soon. Try create side hustle too, raising triplets isnt a joke.
If your wife wants to come back, consider her for the sake of your kids. I dont blame her cus it is not easy to live in poverty, even as a man (you are a bit comfortable now and will know what i mean). if you remarry, their step-mum may maltreat them or the new wife may naturally want to have more kids.

Amen thanks for the advise

genaro2000:
How is your girl child

She is fine

AjiBussu:
Congrats op

Thank you

Foodqueen:
U didn't read through

The man that emplyed him

Sorry ma i tought you were talking about my ex wife and I. Amen thank you

Foodqueen:
Congratulations.

May the good Lord bless their union soonest.

Which union lol?

tensazangetsu20:
Congratulations. Don't have more kids o

Thanks lol I don't need more children , 3 are enough for me

Kobojunkie:
So now you can afford to take care of your triplets? Wait, you left them in the village? Hope you plan to have then join you soon?

Yes I can afford to take care of them, I have not plan for them to join me anytime soon

jahsharon:
Please remove his wife from your post.

I thank God on your behalf, and for the wonderful things HE has been doing for me

Amen thank you

dahmie2013:
Congratulations...

Thank you

Chimaobi302:

This is a good news ..
I join you to celebrate and Thank God for his help upon your family and I pray that greater heights/blessings awaits you and your family In Jesus name..Amen...
Stay blessed

Amen thank you

Do you remember me papa triplets on 55k salary I couldn't afford to feeds my children talkless of their school fees, but today I am smiling again because I have gotten a new job the salary is 125k relocating wasn't easy for me because I had to leave my 2 boys with my mother in the village. But I had to do it for them now I can afford to feed , pay their school I am thankful to God and to the great man who has given me this opportunity to be able to cater for my boys and mother. His wife is a ttc may God bless them with plenty children . Anyone who is going through the same thing please dont loose hopes one day you will also smile again

chimeremodlyn:
The woman obviously knows that he cannot take good care of them. Imagine taking them to the village. Why not invite his mother to come stay with him and raise them under his watchful eyes in the city. The woman only left them for a while cos she had to go and get a job before coming for the girl. Trust me, She's coming for the rest cos obviously she loves the kids. so, instead of looking for a solution on how to take care of the kids, you're talking abt a woman coming to take her daughter. i know she didnt take d right steps, but trust me, she will take better care of that child than your mother. Even your mum knows that. Your mum is too old to raise responsible kids at her age. allow the woman rest. she has taken care of you, why burden her with taking care of your kids. Me, i for no leave anyone for you o

Just to clarify that my ex wife and I had never lived in the city before we are born and bred In Enugu and I didn't take my children to the village to my mother. We had both lived in Enugu in the same house with my mother when she left the marriage she went back to her mother place somewhere in Enugu. The house that she visited the kids it is the same house we were living together and it is where I am still living with my mother and my 2 boys. She left Enugu to Lagos for a greener pasture and it is only 3 months since she had left.

frozen70:
Is it possible you give me her contact

Where do you base

OK ma I will dm you her number and I live in Enugu

frozen70:
Thanks dear for appreciating my first advice

Just be calm, She won't hurt her daughter, but I think she wants to be with one of her children

But if she was smart enough, she would have allowed you keep those children and be visiting them till you guys can sort things out

She may have switched off her number to just keep dealing with you

Be calm and relax till you get her on phone

This kind of matter have to be resolved amicably

If you take the matter any where, they may end up giving her the sole custody of the children then you will be visiting her to see the children

You see women,
You can't know what is in that one's mind until she hatches it

Take it calm and I pray she doesn't come back to take the rest children

Thank you ma I am trying to stay calm but I am concern about my daughter safety , her mother had been to Lagos for 3 months I don't think she even has her own apartment or a job that she will be able to provide for the girl. Also I don't know who she is living with and the risk of her being sexually abused is high. I just hope she is safe and nothing will happen to her

JoeSoapy:
Have one of her family member arrested they will provide your Ex and daughter I promise you.

I don't want to arrest her mother because she is innocent she didn't support her when she left the marriage with the girl and abandoned me with the 2 boys, it was later that she brought her back because she was demanding for more money for her upkeep and I refused to give her more money. The mother has no hands in the kidnapping and she should not suffer for her daughter mistake

frozen70:
You need to call her and ask her why she went that way with out informing you

That you will appreciate she returns her back and when she gets settled, she can be taking them for holidays
Those children doesn't need to be separated in a canny way

But let me ask you, why can't you and your wife live together

Why did you separate from her

Can't you guys reconcile

Her number is switched off, I don't know if you can still remember my old thread when she was starving my mother you have given me very good advice which I am grateful

Dogalmighty17:
You say she is your ex wife. Did a court of law annul your marraige? If so, were you awarded custody of the kids? These are germane issues you didn't mention.
If a court hasn't dissolved your marraige, then she remains your wife and the issue of custody remains in flux. There seems to be nothing you can do at the moment except you go to court and officially file for divorce.

We only did traditional marriage

Helpout12345:
Even at that, she needs to do it proper way.

Thank you

mardis:
Leave the girl child with her now. You have the two boys already in your custody allow her take care of the girl. It seems she is capable of doing that. Before you'll go and marry another woman that'll come and turn her to housegirl. And besides she will be more safer under the watchful eyes of her mother. Aren't you afraid of all this child molestors and abusers?

She should have asked for my permission she shouldn't have taken her away from me without my consent , plus she is only been to Lagos since August she doesn't have any relatives there i don't know where or who she is staying with and if she is working who will be taking care of my child. She is only 3 years old she is at risk of being molest in Lagos than in the village

Helpout12345:
Was there any prior discussion around the children custody between you both before this?

And what is she into in Lagos, do you think she can take good care of the girl in Lagos with her?

She has abandoned them for me and we didn't have a discussion about the children custody, she is her mother she can take care of her but I am not happy with her because she didn't informed me that she was taking her she lied to her mother that I have given her the permission to take the girl to Lagos . I think she is working in Lagos but I am not very sure