₦airaland Forum

I’ll continue using my laptop on my bed till I can set up a workstation
Thanks for the info anyways…

SixSeven:
1. Imagine you were a woman who grew up in the 40s to 60s where polygamy was the norm, will you consider him marrying another woman after you as cheating or is cheating when a man has concubines instead of wives?

The 40s and 60s was an era when women were as good as nothing. Women did not have a say anywhere. Women learnt to follow orders without defying. Women were expected to follow instructions without question. Fathers choose husbands for the daughters and nothing will happen. Women did not have options. Even when education was first introduced, the females were not considered. Most of the women married early. Cos once you start developing breasts and seeing period, you’re mature and this is mostly between 14 and 17. At that age, you are expected to be in a man’s house and be bearing children. Back then people rely heavily on farming and they create their manual labour themselves by giving birth to a large number of children. Obviously, one woman cannot give birth to more than 4-7, hence the need for other women. It’s not like there was nothing like cheating in those days. Even those that have multiple wives at home still have affairs with other women outside. Men have been cheating from time immemorial. If I was born in those days, we’ll go with what is considered normal in those days even if it’s not convenient.

SixSeven:
2. Will women consider a man who provides for family and puts family first but sleeps with another woman cheating? Remember that it used to be said that men take advantage of economic benefits to put women in line but in this case, she has her money but he still does his work and does not collect any money from her to run the house. Maybe I should rephrase the question. Will you consider a man who wants more families and still provides for you cheating?

The problem is most people do not understand what companionship means. Cheating is cheating. The fact that a man is providing for his family does not give him an excuse to cheat. Providing for your family is your responsibility as the husband and father. Cheating means you do not rate them, you do not love them as much as you think you do.

SixSeven:
3. Tell me what is cheating. Be it monogamy or otherwise. Thank you

In a relationship, cheating is a breach of trust involving emotional or physical intimacy with someone outside the established partnership. It centers on deception and the violation of agreed-upon boundaries. Whether through physical acts or emotional affairs, it undermines the foundation of loyalty and mutual respect.
You have chosen to be with somebody. You have decided to build a family with this person. This person is supposed to be “your person”. They trust you with everything, and there’s an agreement or covenant or promise between the two of you to be for each other alone and then you go out and betray that person. When you cheat, it means you’re not to be trusted, your words are not to be trusted and you lack common sense.

SixSeven:
4. I know women then who married men who were lesser than them just as there were many women who did not have enough money so the husband was the caretaker. Today, alot of women can take care of themselves and don't need a man (though historically, before the British women in the south were enterprise owners too which led to riots because of taxes in market). Now to my question, would you say women today think a man still has an unfair advantage over women despite the situation where she can sing Pussycat Doll's I don't need a man? Or maybe I didn't understand what sheet meant, what is sheet now?

When I said back in the days, women put up with shit just to stay married, I mean…
Men knew that women had limited options. There was little or nothing they could do on their own. Is it the ones that were “gifted” to their husbands? Or the ones that married for survival? Or the ones that were full time housewives dependent on the husbands? Where would they go? How would they survive? Or better still, staying to take care of their children themselves so another woman doesn’t maltreat them if they decided to leave.
There were men that were sexual abusers, drunkards, chronic womanizers, wife beaters, some can’t even provide adequately and most of the time, the women decided to stay. They didn’t want to be labeled as single mothers.

I’m not sure that there’s any woman that doesn’t need a man. Deep down, we all want a man, our own man but not just any man. If he wants to come, he should come correct. And a correct man doesn’t necessarily mean finances. Though it’s part of it but a correct man is kind, considerate, loving, supportive, responsible, MATURED, and has sense.

If you have further questions please, let me know.

It is well.

Sometimes, I see these things and I just think about the fact that when somebody dies, it’s over. I mean…that’s all.

May God rests her soul.

Why not just kukuma leave your husband and go be with whoever you want to be with??

This world will be a better place if people are being straightforward. You know you want to be with another man that is not your husband, just leave the man alone and let him know that he’s single instead of doing this. The man too knows that she’s a married woman ooo
The two of them should be punished abeg

If you have never been betrayed by someone you love, you may not fully understand how painful and wicked this is

BTW, it’s the way this CS is dominated by men for me and all of them are bashing the woman knowing fully well that it takes two to tango. Bunch of hypocrites!

Do you have Dell latitude 7490 256G SSD 16gb RAM

SixSeven:
I have a few questions on this. Do. You mind me asking?

please go ahead

SixSeven:
Something I should have added is that marriage teaches patience. I was listening to a man in his 100s say that people today are so quick to divorce at the slightest bang but they were brought up to weather it out. It's not to say people should suffer in silence if it is not working but it's only going to get worse in this me-centric times we live in where we put everything on the internet and we compare our filtered lives while others help us like, share and comment on what they have been shown. Everyone wants to he Mr and Mrs Right and they will always have fans even while plotting their own destruction. No one wants to compromise anymore or work to preserve the institution. Our alter ego is so big for the cameras that the ego no fit hear word again. Our lives are now a show

while I understand your perspective, I’m sure we both understand that it is not applicable to everybody.

Some of us don’t seek validation on social media. Some of us don’t even live for the camera.
And when you talk about slightest inconvenience in marriage, most of our parents really put up with shit just to stay married.
IMO, everybody should know what they can compromise and what they cannot.
I agree that we don’t have to run off at the slightest inconvenience but still, we should be considerate when dealing with people.
I would not put up with a cheat just to stay married and I’d definitely not manage a man that doesn’t understand putting family first.

Marriage is a lot and it’s better to calm down before entering

Olachase:
you think that's not a genuine excuse

And why are you turning your back at us at your DP

I really think it’s not a genuine excuse cos it’s not all of us that are on TikTok following trends and doing 360 for the camera

Btw, my face has been on my profile for over a decade and I just thought to change it

spiceadole:
Isn't that that name 30+ single women are labelled on this forum? Or are you new here?

if you had checked my profile, you would have known if I’m new here or not.

And even if that’s what 30+ women are labeled on this forum, you reiterating that means you agree with whoever started it

spiceadole:
Despite all the warnings, you are considering evening newspaper for marriage.
Lol

A 30 years old lady is evening newspaper to you? Seriously

SixSeven:
Won't tell the public but I can tell you that marrying young was never alien to Africans until the Western education confused them that they have to wait till they have PhD before they married. Meanwhile, marriage is a school of life and no amount of books can teach you. It's the only school where the certificate is given before you attend it. Some people tear theirs in the name of divorce.

Your grandparents got married in their 19s and early 20s when it was most fertile for the woman and when the men had more energy to raise families. Today, they are bombarded with fear while not afraid to be chiking each other. Parents keep deceiving themselves that their children are not ripe for marriage but their body is going through hormonal changes.

honestly, you couldn’t have said this any better but then, it’s the situation we’ve found ourselves in

Olachase:
I am 30 already and I don't even have a girlfriend talk less of wife

The ladies of this generation fear me

Husband day outside day find wetin family go eat
Wife day on social media day do 360 for the camera to get 1k view

🫠🫠🫠

so, that’s your reason for not wanting to get married?

Why not look at it from another angle?

Have you tried to ask these “girls” the exact reason?
Cos to me, it feels like you don’t know the actual reason these people are pulling away.

I think you should do a self-evaluation.
There’s nothing spiritual about this. If you keep acting the same way to 100 people, you’ll keep getting the same feedback.

Besides, as a lady, I’ll treat all guys the same until a particular person stand out to me.

Happy birthday to Olamide Badoo!

I just love him, no noise, no heavy social media presence. Baba just dey live his life lowkey.

Many Happy Returns! 🥳🥳

Please how do I set my Redmi 10 camera

4lorunsho:
You can check, I have done so

I can't find it...

Ladylite:
Mummy I greet you o

Hello ma, how are you doing? I'm not sure I know who this is

Peppermintflav:
My shout out goes to the following: kosky, MizzD, safarigirl, Venita, switlily25, Twaci, Mimienudles, prettybae23, queenbetsy, sweettease, Liliantalks, kestolove95, curvysola, Ladylite, obembet, Facebooker, Amatarasha, Prettydiamond, obontami, Lamanii22, Joystark, missimelda01. These are girls I would love to date I sent dm to many dem no respond Happy new 2021 to you all.

Happy New Year to you too. Re-send the pm

4lorunsho:
I want to shoot my shot ni o or can WD do WhatsApp

it's fine, send a pm

Shame on his royalty!

Tueh!!!

4lorunsho:
Cool, Merry Christmas and happy new year

I wish you same. Enjoy...

Na their wahala be that.

4lorunsho:
Hey you, what state are you from?

Ogun state...

givv:
good for you then, but you would agree with me that lots of your folks are so phony. Fake hair, fake eyelashes, fake nails, face painted like a clown. It makes me sick, God help me find a real woman.

I hope you find that real woman...

okay, we've seen her...

givv:
Fake as shit, ladies so fucking unsecured they have paint everywhere.

hey you! yes, you! Not all of us like to paint our faces or nails.
As a matter of fact, I kinda feel uncomfortable with it...

Emuf:
How much is chicken in your area?

I don't know cos I didn't ask for the price

Even if some of us are not looking forward to ordinary chicken, our hope is found in Christ alone...


Merry Christmas in advance!