My phone started to ring. It was a surprise that Funmi was the one calling. "Excuse me," I told Mariam as I picked the call.

"Hello, Funmi."

"Hello, Michael. Is this the best treatment you can give to me?"

"I don't understand what you mean?"

"How will you understand? I left your place since Sunday morning and you never called me since then."

"But you left in anger," I reminded her. "You barely responded to my farewell that day."

"Does that mean you should never call me again?"

I shook my head in perplexity. "Alright, Funmi. I'm sorry for not calling you."

She seemed molified. "Apology accepted."

Before I could say anything, further, she cut the line. Phew, what a lady! Mariam was looking at me curiously.

"That was Funmi, my ex girlfriend that came on Saturday. Things did not go well between us and she left in anger on Sunday morning. I had not contacted her since then, and she just called to express her displeasure over it."

Mariam nodded. There was a long pause. "Did you have sex with her?" she asked suddenly.

I wasn't expecting that and I was thrown off balance.

"In all honesty, no."

Another long pause. "Why?" she asked.

Now, I was getting baffled.

"Why what?"

She looked at me solemnly. "Why didn't you do it with her?"

I became solemn too. "I have learnt that sex is overrated; that sex should be controlled; and that sex should be between a man and his wife only."

Mariam looked away for some time and then stared at me again. I was ready for another question from her.

"Are you saying, in all honesty, that in any relationship you have with a female henceforth - no matter how intimate - there will be no sex?"

I nodded. "I don't deceive myself that it will be easy, but, yes, that is what I intend to do. I pray the Lord will continue to be my strenght."

She suddenly smiled. "I will help you to say Amen to that."

A sales girl moved towards me with a smile.

"Perhaps, you need my assistance," she said.

"Yes," I replied. "I will like to buy a pair of bra for a friend. I think she likes La Perla brand."

"Good. These are La Perla. What colour?"

We moved towards the shelf and I examined the bras.

"Black colour," I said.

She smiled again. "What size?" Now, that was where I was at loss.

"I'm sorry I don't know that." I looked at the sales girl critically. "She's about your size."

The girl nodded and selected two brassieres. "You can pick one of these."

I chose the one on her right. The price on it was what I would consider to be outrageous on a normal day. Thirty-five thousand naira to buy one bra! Just one! That was outrageous, but I would do it for Mariam.

I paid through POS and left the mall. When I got home, I went straight to Mariam's door. She invited me inside and showed her the package I had for.

"Oh, but you shouldn't have bothered," she said.

"It's okay," I replied. "It's my pleasure."

I could see happiness in her eyes as she examined the item.

"It's the replica of the missing bra," she said.

"I hope it's your size," I put in.

She examined the tag again. "Yes, it's my size. Thank you so much.

" I nodded approvingly.

"Alright." I turned to go.

"Wait," she said. "I'll put it on, and you'll tell me it fits me or not."

The following day, I went to work early as usual, got busy and returned queitly to my room again. By eight p.m, Mariam called my line.

"Hello, good evening," she greeted.

"Good evening Mariam. How was the day?"

"Fine. You're at home now?"

"Yes, I came not long ago."

"Okay, I'm coming now."

I grinned. "Alright, see you."

In a couple of minutes, she was in my room.

"Hello, Mariam."

"Hello, Mike. How was work?"

"Fine. And yours?"

"Fine too. Your face is suddenly scarce."

I smiled. I offered her a seat. "You know how the routine is. One will wake up early to work, work strenously, and come back late and tired. It's not easy."

She nodded. "I agree with you. Those of us working within Ikeja axis don't know the merit."

I nodded. "Exactly."

There was a moment of silence. I changed the television station to a news channel.

"Have you heard from your girlfriend?" she suddenly asked. "Have you reconciled?"

I shook my head emphatically. "The relationship is beyond redemption. She has clearly told me to forget about her."

"Sorry about that," Mariam offered.

I tried a smile. "It's okay. Such is life. We move on."

"I would have brought you some food, but I didn't cook this evening."

"It's okay, Mariam. I don't have any entitlement to that."

My phone started to ring. It was a surprise that Funmi was the one calling. "Excuse me," I told Mariam as I picked the call.

Instead of verbal response, she held my right, slipped it under the t-shirt and moved it on her left breast.

"I want you to feel this. Feel my love for you. Take it, take me. I'm all yours."

In the semi-darkness of the room, I shook my head.

"If you remember, I told you that we would be friends only. Sorry, I won't accept what you ask me to take."

I slipped my hand away from her breast and from inside the t-shirt.

"It's like you can not clearly see what I'm offering you."

She got up from the bed and switched on the full light. Then, she removed the t-shirt. I could see that she had earlier removed the tight. Now, she stood totally nude before my eyes.

"Can't you see this? Can't you see what you've been missing? Hello, Michael. Funmi, your babe, is back."

The sleep had disappeared from me. I sat up on the bed and stared at her. The nude body before me was pretty and attractive. The figure was curvy, no doubt.

"We're just friends, Funmi. We're no longer lovers. Thank you, but let's just keep the relationship at friendship level, okay? Now, please wear the cloth and come back to bed."

She opened her mouth in shock, unable to say a word. Slowly, she picked up the t-shirt and wore it. Her shock turned to muted anger. She climbed back to the bed, moved far away from me and even turned her back to me. I smiled knowingly and thanked God that I had passed the litmus test. * * * The shopping mall at Allen was a big one.

There were arrays of different products, most of them exotic. I moved to the section where they sold perfumes. The place itself had such a fascinating scent. But this was not my destination. I moved further to where they sold lingerie. Yes, this was the section I wanted to come. Different lingerie were on display, from camisoles to bras, panties, and so on.

A sales girl moved towards me with a smile.

She had come back after realizing that she had chased a wild goose. She had asked for forgiveness and had offered herself. Should I miss this opportunity? Was a bird in hand not worth two in the bush? I shuddered at these thoughts. Calm down, I told myself. Even if Faith decided not to come back to my life, having intimate relationship with Funmi must be a bygone matter, and I must let bygone be bygone. My mind veered to Mariam.

Despite her snobbishness, she appeared ... I could not finish the description. All I could say was that there was something special about her. I soon felt sleepy and dozed off. Many minutes later, I felt the hand of Funmi waking me up. "Time to go to bed," she said. "Yeah. Hmm...you can sleep on the bed while I sleep on this."

She looked alarm. "What! No way. Why would you want to discomfort yourself? The bed is more than large enough to contain the two of us."

I sighed and stood up. "Alright."

I went to the toilet to ease myself. By the time I was back, Funmi had switched off the t.v and was lying on the bed. I stripped myself down to the boxers and joined her on the bed. I tried to have a respectable distance from her but she gave me a close-up. I closed my eyes and tried to sleep. I could feel Funmi's hand on my chest.

"I miss you," she cooed.

I didn't say a word. Her hand gently rubbed on my chest.

"Are you still angry with me?" she asked.

"No. I told you to err is human."

Her hand rubbed more on my chest, down to my tummy, and moved to my chest again. "Why are you not responding?" she asked again. I could have chuckled.

"Responding to what?"

Instead of verbal response, she held my right, slipped it under the t-shirt and moved it on her left breast.

"Okay, but get it at the back of your mind that nothing amorous will happen between us again."

She smiled. "Yes, sir!" she said sarcastically.

We went on to chat. She was currently working in the state ministry of land and survey, she said, and she was still living in her parents' house at Anthony. I told her about my job and the challenges. We chatted about old time. For now, I was relieved from worrying about any missing bra.

But I was miffed that Faith took the line of action that she took. When it was getting towards evening, I asked if my guest would like to take rice. There were some foodstuffs and we could cook rice. She agreed and pronto went on to cook the food. She was not a good cook but was better than Faith. I commended her for her effort. When it was minutes after seven, I asked her if it would not be a good idea for her to start going home so that she would not be late.

"I'm sleeping over tonight," she declared.

I raised an eye brow on that. "Is that really a good idea?" I asked.

She chuckled. "Is it really a bad idea?" she parried.

My mind was busy. I resolved that no matter the temptation, I would overcome it. I would have to prove to her that I meant all that I had said. We continued to chat and watch the television until late in the night.

"Do you have a t-shirt I change to?" she asked.

I stood up went to the wardrobe.

"Sure." I gave her a white t-shirt.

She stood up as she got it. She unzipped the ankara skirt she was wearing. I could see she was wearing a black tight underneath. Then, she unzipped the ankara blouse. The black bra that came into view immediately reminded me of the missing bra. What Funmi was wearing looked so much like the other one; but then, bras look alike, don't they? Without minding that I was there, Funmi unhooked the bra and unclothed her breasts. I looked away. It would be a tough task but I must pass the litmus test. She finally put on the t-shirt and came back to sit on the sofa.

My mind went to Faith. I was sure she did not mean it when she said it was over between us. I was sure she would be very jealous if she should come inside the room right now. But, what if she meant what she had said? What if we would never be intimate again? That would she would never be my love again. I sighed. Was it not fortuitous that Funmi was here?

She had come back after realizing that she had chased a wild goose. She had asked for forgiveness and had offered herself. Should I miss this opportunity? Was a bird in hand not worth two in the bush? I shuddered at these thoughts.

Calm down, I told myself. Even if Faith decided not to come back to my life, having intimate relationship with Funmi must be a bygone matter, and I must let bygone be bygone. My mind veered to Mariam.

.

Boobs have suddenly become objects of interest with many write-ups coming up on the subject.

Some have even quoted the Bible to show us that attraction for the mammary organs have spiritual backing.

All the same, there is need to understand that while the Bible does not condemn a man being fixated to his wife's boobs, the fixation should be limited to one's spouse.

Being attracted to a lady other than your wife's boobs have consequences which include being guilty of lust, psychological and emotional drain, and avoidable financial drains.

Stop looking at women's boobs and focus on how to make your life better.

Thank you.

"It's okay," I said in a way to console her. "In life, we stumble and move on again. I know God has a purpose for everything. I'm sure your real man will still come your way."

"Mike, that's ...why I'm here. I've come to plead and to ask that we continue from where we stopped. Please, Michael, forgive me."

I forced a smile. "I've forgiven you. After all, to err is human and to forgive divine. However, it will not be possible for us to continue from where we stopped for the simple reason that I'm in a relationship with another lady. You don't expect that I will be without a lover for the past two years, do you?"

She shook her head. "No, I don't. But since she has broken up with you, is she not a past issue?"

I looked confused. "Broken up with who?"

Now, she too looked slightly confused. "Hasn't she broken up with you?"

"Says who? There's no such thing, my dear."

She smiled wanly. "Come on, Mike. Be sincere. She broke up with you over the allegation of your infidelity."

I was amazed. "Where did hear you such story? There's no such thing!"

"Let's try to be sincere to each other. Your ex called Tope that she has got a good proof of your unfaithfulness and that it was all over between the two of you."

"Tope told you that my girlfriend said all these?" I asked testily.

"Yes. Is it not true?"

I wasn't happy with what Tope did, but I tried not to show it. When Faith called him about what she saw in my room and her decision to severe the relationship, was Tope, as a friend, not supposed to call me and asked about what went wrong? He didn' do that. Rather, he informed Funmi that the coast was clear for her.

"Well, it was true that my girlfriend, Faith, and I had altercation this morning. It was only a minor issue which I believe would be settled soonest."

Funmi disagreed. "A minor issue, yet she vowed that the relationship is over?"

I grimaced. "Anyway, there's no need we argue over that. The fact still remains that you can't just walk in now and expect that our relationship will go on like before."

"I understand, Michael. You need time to make some adjustment. I'll wait. Can we, at least, be friends, for now?"

That friendship could be dangerous, my mind said. All the same, if I could show self-restraint and a lot of discipline, there would be no harm.

"Okay, but get it at the back of your mind that nothing amorous will happen between us again."

I support that NK should be released.

Kudos to her.

It is good to give back to the community.

Feminism is not from God.

God does not want man to oppress woman, but that doesn't mean He created them 'equally'.

Feminism is from the pit of hell.

"I know it's difficult to believe but it's the truth. If not that I have a visitor right now, we would go together to search my room."

"You have a visitor?"

I nodded. "Yes, a female visitor. But she's just an old friend. Once again, my sincere apology for the missing bra. See you later."

She nodded. "See you, Mike."

Wow, what a day! I left Mariam and went back to my room.

Funmi looked at me enquiringly. "Sorry, I went to settle a matter with a neighbour," I said. "What can I offer you?"

She shrugged. "Anything."

I nodded. "Give me another moment to get them for you."

I left the room for the main gate. Just opposite the house across the road was a provision store. I bought two bottles of malt and packs of digestive biscuits. Then I returned to the house. I kept thnking about the mysterious disappearance of the bra. How could it disappear just like that? Thank God, Mariam did not make further trouble about it. Then, my mind went to Funmi. I hoped her visit was just a social one. I would make her realize that though her abrupt exit was painful, I had moved on with life and was currently saddled with another lover.

By the time I re-entered the room, she had switched on the television and was flipping the remote control from one channel to the other.

"Here we are." I set the refreshment on the centre table and brought an opener from the fridge.

"Thank you, Mike. I know you're always a darling."

I opened the bottle for her while I sat on the sofa next to her.

"I know you're curious about many things," she stated. "Don't worry, I'll explain all."

I nodded. She was right, for I was eager to know a lot.

"It was Tope that gave me your address."

I had suspected this so I was not surprised about hearing it. Tope was my good friend and we had come a long way. I had also known Tope since I was in the university.

"I first asked Tope for your address some weeks back, but he was foot dragging. Meanwhile, I pleaded with him not to disclose to you that I had contacted him. I said I would make it a surprise for you. Finally, this afternoon, he gave me your address. Here I am with the surprise."

I grinned and nodded. She was a surprise indeed. "I thought by now you will happily married in America."

She shook her head sadly. "The guy is a scam. I discovered late last year that he was already married in U.S.A. Well, better late than never, but I'll prefer not to talk about it."

I nodded musingly. So the whole fuss Funmi made about marrying an American based Nigerian ended up unpleasantly. What a life. It was that same euphoria that led to my being jilted. Anyway, life went on.

"It's okay," I said in a way to console her. "In life, we stumble and move on again. I know God has a purpose for everything. I'm sure your real man will still come your way."

"Sorry for the intrusion," Mariam said. "What about your guest?"

"Oh, she's gone back. She left early this morning."

Mariam nodded and left the room. I settled down to eat after sanctifying it in the name of the Father, the Son and the Holy Spirit, not minding the fact that I ate not long ago. The food was delicious, as expected. Between the cookery of Faith, Funmi and Mariam, Mariam was the best. Again, I had to caution myself against being enamoured to Mariam. After the meal, I took the plates to the kitchen for washing. I then returned them to Mariam, thanking her profusely.

"It's okay, Mike," she said modestly. "Any time."

I went back to my room. I did not eat anything again that day. Later, I ironed some clothes to get ready for work the following day, Monday.


* * *

I woke up early as usual. By five-thirty in the morning, I left home. Since I worked on Lagos Island, I must set forth at dawn. By ten minutes to eight I was in the office. As an accounting officer to a consulting firm, I must always dress corporately. During the lunch break, I sent a Whatsapp message to Faith. I greeted her and asked how was the night. The marks indicated that she had received the message, but she did not reply until after several minutes.
Her reply was a bombshell. "Get out of my life!" she wrote.

I was depressed. How could Faith write such a devastating thing? Much later, to my chagrin, I realized she had blocked my number. She also blocked me on other social media. Wow! Now, I believed, beyond any reasonable doubt that my relationship with Faith had hit the rock. There would be no need I called her again. I tried to put all my energy to work and to forget about her. After closing, I joined the staff bus and alighted at Maryland.

From there I would take a bus to Opebi. On our street, I thought of what i would eat that evening. There was still bread and sardines that could suffice. I could see light in Mariam's room and soft music coming from there. No, I didn't have the intention of seeing her today. I quietly went to my room.

The following day, I went to work early as usual, got busy and returned queitly to my room again. By eight p.m, Mariam called my line.

"Hello, good evening," she greeted.

"Good evening Mariam. How was the day?"

"Fine. You're at home now?"

"Yes, I came not long ago."

A shame. Even with the epileptic supply.

Holy slaps indeed. Madam, go and mend ways and sin no more.

Seeing her now was a complete case of a bolt from the blue. She entered the room and looked around it appraisingly.

"Hmm, more like a cosy love nest. Not bad, though."

I offered the sofa while I sat on the bed. "So, this is where you're hiding," she said sarcastically.

Hiding? I disagreed. "Let's just say this is where I'm staying for now."

Then I remembered that Mariam would be expecting that thing from. I must see her and explain things to her whether she would believe me or not.

"Excuse," I told Funmi. "Just one minute."

I left my room. Almost timidly, I knocked at Mariam's door.

"Yes, open the door and come inside," she said from within. "The door is not locked."

I entered the room solemnly. She was watching a programme on the t.v and munching peanuts from a bottle. She turned to look at me expectantly. I shook my head.

"I'm so sorry I took time. You won't believe I've been searching for it."

She clouded her face briefly. "Searching for what?"

"The bra. I've been searching for that bra. I had put it in a polythene bag. Now, I can't find it inside, or anywhere."

"Wait a minute, are you saying that bra is missing?"

I nodded grimly. "Exactly. It's a mystery to me. I cannot find it where I left it. I've even searched inside the wardrobe and everywhere. I could not find it anywhere. I'm so sorry I put you in so much distress."

She seemed to muse over this.

"Look," I quickly put in. "I'm ready to pay the price. Just say the cost."

She sighed. "Don't bother," she said.

"I know it's difficult to believe but it's the truth. If not that I have a visitor right now, we would go together to search my room."

I laughed briefly over this. She went to the side where she kept some pots and a small gas cooker. "I want to prepare lunch, if you don't mind," she said.

I stood up to go.

"No, no, I don't mean you should go," she said quickly.

I smiled. "I know, but I only came around to greet you. And I've done that."

"Oh." She looked a little bit disappointed.

"Don't worry," I said with a smile. "We'll still be seeing each other." I winked at her and left.

Back in my room, I had to caution myself. I must not be carried away by Mariam. Faith was still my love until it was proved beyond reasonable doubt that she was no longer mine. I wanted to be patient and fair to her. Developing affection for Mariam could create complications if in a short time Faith came to her senses. I changed the chanel of the television to watch live football match, but it was an uninspiring one and I soon found myself dozing off. I woke up when knock sounded at my door.

On opening the door, I found Mariam with a tray of food.

"I brought you this," she said, handing the tray to me.

"Oh, but you shouldn't have bothered," I said, almost coyly.

"It's swallow food. I hope you like it."

I smiled. "Thank you so much, Mariam. I really appreciate this."

I took the tray from her and set it on the centre table. It was amazing how things had changed between yesterday and today. About twenty-eight hours ago, Mariam was pestering me about her missing underwear. Now, the same lady was the one serving me hot food. All the same, my mind said I should thread cautiously. There were two plates and a bottle of water in the tray. I opened the first plate and found it contained yellow garri made into hot big mould of eba.

As soon as I opened the second plate, aroma of the egusi soup with assorted meats hit my nose. I had not tasted it but I was sure it would be very delicious. Just then, there was a tap on the door and without waiting for response, the door was opened.

"Sorry for the intrusion," Mariam said. "What about your guest?"

"Oh, she's gone back. She left early this morning."

Goodness, she picked it!

"Hello, Faith," I quickly spoke into the mouthpiece. "Were you in my house not too long ago?"

"What are saying? Of course I was there in the morning."

I grimaced. ''No, I'm not talking about that one. I mean, did you come back to the house when I was not inside? Did you take the bra?"

"Bra?" Faith yelled. "What nonsense! What nonsense bra!"

I was aghast. "Calm down," I quickly put in. "I'm talking about the bra you saw in my room in the morning. Did you come around to take it? I need to take it back to the owner."

I could see that I was sweating.

"Are you high on something?" Faith yelled again. "How could you imagine I would take somebody's bra!? As if I don't have my own bra! SMH!"

Before I could say anything further, she cut the line. I was exasperated. Faith was the only person that had access to my place. If, as she said, she did not take the bra, who did? There was a knock at my door. I quickly brought handkerchief from my pocket to dab the sweats on my face. Then, I went to see who was at the door.

The whiff of the of the perfume the person was wearing hit my nose as soon as I opened the door.

"Hello, Michael."

My mouth dropped open on sighting the intruder.

"Funmi!" I said in wonder. "What are you doing here? How did you find this place?"

She smiled and corked her head to a side. "Are you not going to let me in before your barrage of questions?"

I was not in the mood to entertain visitors but I had no option than to let Funmi inside. Funmi was my ex lover as well as a benefactor. We met during our university days. She was a benefactor in the sense that she assisted me a lot financially back then.

She quit the relationship about two years ago when she told me she had met an American based Nigerian that was serious enough to propose marriage. It was not easy to say goodbye to her, but I had to move on with life. Seeing her now was a complete case of a bolt from the blue. She entered the room and looked around it appraisingly.

I said this, hoping my gambit had paid off. Once again, she appeared to be weighing my words.

She suddenly shrugged. "Okay."

I smiled radiantly at her. "Good. I shall be back with it in a jiffy."

I patted her left shoulder, stood up and left the room. Amazing! Women must be amazing creatures! Not too long ago, this same lady was insisting that the bra in question was not her own. Now, with little pet talk, she had agreed that I should bring it. Wonderful! May God bless madam landlady. I was happy when I unlocked my door and entered my room. Now, I could rest from the hassles of a missing bra. The white polythene bag containing the bra was still on the edge of the bed where I had left it. I went to pick the bag and immediately stopped short. Nothing was inside the polythene bag. Was it not in it that I kept the bra? I turned the nylon upside down. Nothing came out of it. Jesus!

Where did I keep the bra? I opened the wardrobe and started searching. I could only see my clothes. The bra! My mind screamed at me. Where was the bra? I searched under pillows, the edges of the mattress, under the bed, behind the camp cooking gas cylinder and everywhere. The item could not be found. I opened the fridge and the cooking pots, still, I could not find it. To show how desperate I was in the search, I lifted my t-shirt to be sure I was not wearing it.

That was preposterous, right? How could I, a man, ever wear a bra? That was desperation at it peak. This was astonishing to say the least. Now, what would I tell Mariam? Would I just say I could not find it; that the thing just disappeared? I had told her I would bring it and she would be waiting. What would I do now? I had never been as confused as I was now in my life. My mind frantically tried to find a reason. Had someone entered the room to take the bra when I went to the main building to see the landlady? Who could have done that? Besides, I remembered clearly that I had locked my door. Then, my mind wavered. Wait a minute. I gave Faith a key to my place so she could access it in case she came and I was not around. Did she come around when I was in the main building to see landlady? That could explain it, my mind said.

I picked up my phone to call her. I had earlier called her around noon but she refused to pick the call. This time, I hoped she would. The ringing went on and on. Oh, Faith, pick your call, pick your call, I muttered under my breath. She did not pick it. I redialed her number. It started ringing again. Oh everlasting Father, make Faith to pick this call, I found myself praying.

Goodness, she picked it!

I had to swear to the madam that Mariam's clothing that I had was the one that I tried to give her, which she rejected. I thanked her for the advice and left her flat.


* * *


When I left the main building, I went straight to Mariam's room.

She opened the door as soon as I knocked as if she was expecting me.

"Can I see you for a moment?" I asked.

She nodded. "Okay, come in." It was the first time I would be entering her room. We had always talked outside. I remembered the advice given by the landlady. It appeared she might be right after all. Mariam's room was the same size with mine but I liked the way she arranged everything. From her rack of shoes, I could see that she had many pairs. The room had fine scent. Unlike me, there was no clothing on the bed.

There were two settees facing the bed. She offered me one while she sat on the other. I thanked as I took the seat.

"Concerning this current issue," I began. "I want to start by saying first and foremost, I'm not a diabolical person and I will never use your underwear or any one's own for any ritual. God is my witness and I'm ready to swear if need be. Secondly, the one I showed to you is the one I really saw. I can give you my girlfriend's number to confirm. She was even the first to see it. If you're still in doubt after all these explanations, I can take you to my room so that you will do a thorough search."

I paused to get her response. She appeared to be weighing in the the words I just spoke.

"There will be no need for that," she said. I nodded.

"Alright, thank you for believing my words. Since I came here, you and I have no issue until this missing bra matter came up. I admire your decent and easy-going way of life. I will like us to be good friends. I want to assure you once again that I do not have any bad intentions towards you. Thank you for your time. Should I go and bring the bra I have with me now?"

I said this, hoping my gambit had paid off. Once again, she appeared to be weighing my words.

She looked at me in seriousness. "Really, you prayed about a mere bra? How exactly did you say the prayer?"

I laughed shortly. "The prayer was that God should reveal the mystery behind its disappearance."

She chuckled. "I see. What a prayer."

I tried to assure her. "Don't worry. Next time I go to church, I will pray for you."

"Must you go to church before you can say the prayer?"

What a brilliant question. "No. As a matter of fact, God is everywhere, and one can pray anywhere."

She nodded in agreement. "So, why don't you pray for me right now?"

I was amazed. Was she pulling my legs? "Are you serious, Mariam?"

"Come on, Mike. I can't be joking with prayer matters."

Alright, now that she had made me emergency prayer warrior, I would oblige.

"Okay, let's pray. Oh Lord, our everlasting Father, we your children have come before You. First and foremost, we want to thank You for Your goodness, mercy and compassion. We pray that you will continue to be merciful to us in Jesus name. I pray specifically for your daughter, Mariam; Lord, shower her with mercy in Jesus name. Whatever is her heart desire, grant unto her in Jesus name. Let Your Spirit reign in her life in Jesus name. Thank you Father for answered prayer. In Jesus name we prayed. Amen."

It was note-worthy that along the prayers, she was saying fervent amen.

"Wonderful. So, you can pray like this," she enthused. "I can see you becoming a pastor in a short time."

I laughed briefly over this. She went to the side where she kept some pots and a small gas cooker. "I want to prepare lunch, if you don't mind," she said.

It was not funny but I felt like chuckling. "I've returned it to her, she's the one that refused to collect it."

Madam shook her head. "But she said you tried to give her what is not her own."

I shook my head too. "I believe what I tried to give her is hers. It doesn't belong to my ladyfriend, so it must be Mariam's own, yet she refused to take it back."

The madam sighed. "Let me ask you: when she first told you about the missing bra, what did you tell her?"

"Madam, the truth was I couldn't imagine I wrongly picked hes clothing, so I told her I did not see it."

She nodded. "That turned out to be incorrect. The bone of contention now is she came to report that she wants her own bra back."

I shook my head adamantly. "The truth of the matter is that the one I gave her is the one I had seen. By the way, Mariam, tell me how much is it? I'm ready to pay double the price."

Mariam shook her head. "I don't want money. It's my bra I want back."

Madam grinned. "Alright, you know what, Mariam, leave me with him. We'll talk this over."

Mariam stood up to go. "Thank you, mummy," she said and left the sitting-room.

Madam turned to face me squarely. "What went wrong between the two of you?" she asked. "What wrong did you do to her?"

I shook my head. "My relationship with her has always been smooth and cordial without any rancour, until now. Believe me, ma, the insinuation she made that I could use her underwear for something diabolical can never come to pass. I can never do such a thing in my life."

The landlady nodded. "Since you became a tenant in this house, I have never known you for any bad behaviour. Mariam has been here before you and I've not known her for any bad behavior too. What I will advise you now is to try to be friendly with her. May be you've been aloof before. Now, try to be closer to her. Meanwhile, if you've deliberately withheld her bra, return it."

I had to swear to the madam that Mariam's clothing that I had was the one that I tried to give her, which she rejected. I thanked her for the advice and left her flat.

I had a fairly paying job and had never contemplated becoming a 'yahoo boy.'

The idea of doing something fetish with her underwear was, to say the least, absurd. To me it was reprehensible and silly. Mariam was most likely trying to make an issue out of nothing. I was sure the bra I found belonged to her. I would not believe her claim that it was not her brand or that it was not her size. Why couldn't she take what I gave her? It was few minutes after 2.00 p.m and I should think of what to have for lunch. With Faith not around, it was going to be a very boring weekend.

On the television, the referee blew the final whistle signalling the end of the match. My favourite team had won, but my sour mood called for no celebration. There was another knock at my door. Had Mariam come to make more ridiculous allegations? Slowly, I went to open the door. I was confronted by a girl I knew to be the landlady's house girl.

"Good afternoon, sir," she greeted. "Madam say she want see you and you should come now, now." I nodded at her. "Alright, tell her I'll be coming."

The landlady usually sent the girl to summon me on matter concerning payment of electricity bills, waste disposal and other sundry issues. I went inside to remove my keys and lock the door. I then went to the main building. Madam Abdulrazaq, the widow landlady lived in one of the flats on the first floor. She was a woman in her sixties and she lived with her last daughter who, i understood, was in the university. I pressed the bell to madam's flat and it was the house girl that opened the door for me.

On stepping inside the expansive sitting-room, I saw the madam already seated. Surprisingly, Mariam was seated too.

"Good afternoon, madam," I greeted the landlady.

"Good afternoon, Mike," she replied and gestured towards a seat. "Sit down."

I sat on the seat. "Thank you, ma."

She nodded. "I'll go straight to the point," she went on. "Why did you refuse to return Mariam's bra?"

It was not funny but I felt like chuckling.

I could indeed see the differences that she pointed out, but if it was not hers, as she claimed, whose own was it? She returned the black bra to me and I took it back inside my room more confused than ever.


* * *

Some hours later, I tried to relax in my room by watching some live football matches. There was a gentle rapping at my door. My heart raced in excitement. Had Faith realized the folly of her action and had come back? I went on to the door. It was Mariam that was there.

"Can I see you for one moment?" she asked. Her face looked stern and I wondered what was bothering her.

"Sure," I replied. "You can see me right away."

She nodded. "Good. It's on the missing bra issue. I've been thinking about it and I've come to the conclusion that you've not been honest with me."

I was surprised to hear this accusation. I however kept quiet.

"You've not been straight forward at all," she continued. "First, you claimed you did not take the bra. Later, you said you took it, but you only returned the wrong one. Why are you doing all this? Why are taking it as a prank or something?"

I nearly laughed. How could she be insinuating this?

"You're so wrong, Mariam," I said, dropping the sister stuff for good. "You call it prank, how could I be playing such a prank? Faith, my girlfriend, was the first to see it. She accused me of unfaithfulness and left in anger. How could I have been playing pranks?"

"Your prank is your refusal to return my original bra," she retorted.

I became exasperated. "I've given you the one I saw. You're the one claiming it's not your own."

"Because it's not mine!" she fired back. "Look, Mike, I'm aware that some people do sinister thing with people's underwears. If that's your plan, you will fail. Look, I give you three hours to produce my bra!"

With that, she stormed out of my presence. I thought I must be in a bad dream and needed to wake up. See me see trouble! I shook my head and returned inside my room. This was certainly getting out of hand.

How could Mariam accuse me of diabolism? I had been a tenant in that house for the past six months, had she ever seen anything fetish with me? I had a fairly paying job and had never contemplated becoming a 'yahoo boy.'

Hungrychicken:
More wins boss!
I have a few questions, that I'd love for you to answer:
1) how did you stop?
2) what were the side effects after you stopped?
3) is there any physical or health changes observed since you stopped?

Thanks🙏🏽

1. I made a will to stop. I realized I was hooked and I really needed to stop it.
2. No side effects. I felt (and still feel) free.
3. The physical change I observed was that I slightly put on weight.