₦airaland Forum

RIP

same news.....mgbe o bula ofo ihe mtcheeeww

wow,.....,...wnt b unemployed in d future .....

any gud thing will always av De bad side of it.....







dias a BIG difference btw I went to school AND am educated
........

just saying

luli4life: 24thAug.

u c aw i met yhu....

24 August

mhmmm..unfolding

good...

Afam4eva: People do different things for different reasons. Obasanjo supported Jonathan because he saw Jonathan as someone he could pocket but he was wrong. Do you think Obasanjo would have written that letter if Jonathan was still saying "Yes Sir" to him? I doubt that very much.

u av a point ....jonathan will still win...

just imagine..

owk

Akpos Fun Time!!!
YOU KNOW IT'S A NIGERIA MOVIE
WHEN:
~ A man shoots himself on the head 3
times...Habaaa !!!!!!! How in the world
is that possible? ~ RMD remembering
when
he was still 7years old as far back as
1960
and suddenly a HUMMER passes in
front of him....... Chinekeee ~ Patience
Ozokwor poisons Zark Orji's food, she
stirs the poison so that it will circulate
to
all parts of the meal and then she
tastes it, Zack Orji dies while she survives,
Nawaa oo ~ Someone flashes back to
1982 and behind him is a sign board
"Vote
for Goodluck Jonathan" Hmmmm ~ A
7year old character is washing plates and
he suddenly becomes an adult in his
20's
still washing the same plates and
wearing
the same trousers... ~ Omotola is depicted as a poor woman suffering in
the village and has to do serious farm
work to survive only for you to see
that
her fingernails are fixed with long
plastic nails and painted crimson red. ~ Tonto
Dike acting a born again village girl,
yet
has tattoos on her body. ~ Someone
dies
with low cut and his spirit comes back wearing afro... Na wetin? ~ A woman
suddenly decides to poison her
husband,
then she opens her food cabinet and
brings out the substance. Is poison
part of cooking ingredients? ~ They shoot
you
on the leg yet blood starts coming out
from your nose. ~ John Okafor (Mr
Ibu) is
the father of Nkem Owoh (Osofia). Biko
who is older? ~ You must cough
before
you die.. Patience Uzokwu....flashed
back
to wen she waz 17 and playing life....and
she is wearing brazilian hair in
1975..................na wetin?
Add yours keep the ball rolling." Hapi
sundy pals....

Comedy (CBC)
An American zoologist told 2 men
Akpos and
Ochuko to catch lions for him at the
price of
20,000 Dollars per lion. Akpos and Ochuko went into the
forest to catch
the lions.
After a fruitless search, they got
exhausted and
fell asleep. A short while later Akpos heard the
roar of a lion
and woke up.
He saw 150 lions surrounding them
and woke
Ochuko up and said; Ochuko wake up. We are
rich!
One word for Akpos.

5 People Died in my Family this
morning they are;
1. Mr Poverty(35yrs)
2. Mrs Sickness(28yrs)
3. Brother Failure(30yrs)
4.Disappointment( 25yrs)
5. Uncle Backwardness(32yrs) . They will also DIE in ur family too in
Jesus name..
Type AMEN

A MUST READ FOR ALL LADIES
1. Never depend on your boyfriend like
he is your father, show him that before
he met you, you are comfortable and
without him you can still be
comfortable.
2. Do not detest a man because he is
not rich. Rather remember that, he who
is rich today, he may not be rich
tomorrow and he who is poor may not
be poor forever, Richness is like a table
fan, it Rotates.
3. Never you say real men doesn't come
to you when all about you is fake, dress
code, lifestyle, your name, background
etc.

4.Don't say men are just after your
body when you show off all your body
parts. The way you dress is the way
people address you.
5. Do not say you have dated him for
years yet he doesn't want to move the
relationship to the next level, my sister
every relationship must not end in
marriage.
6. Do not say all men are the same due
to a heartbreak, remember even the
bible said: as our facial aspect differs
same goes to our characters and
lifestyles.
7. Do not hate relationship because of
past experience, rather know that
every relationship is a lesson and I tell
you, never you close your eyes
because of the bad things you have
seen because you will never know when the good one passes by if your
eyes are close, don't give up on love.
8. Do not be in a hurry to marry
because as God knows your birthday
same goes to your death day, he
knows all our profile because we are
only like pencils in the hand of the
creator, when your time comes it will happen just like death.
9. You say guys are not serious with
you, when the background of your
pictures are always in a hotel room,
Joints and inside different cars when
you’re not a mechanic, on Facebook
you have more than 4353 friends, you are on bbm with over 1000 bbm
contacts, you’re on 2go with more than
2000friends not to talk of Badoo.
Whatsapp, Eskimi, and many more.
Which means you are emotionally
confused.
10. Always know that things happens
the way God wants it. Tank me later

What is Kiss? Kiss is an upper preparation for lower invasion, that will lead to further penetration,in fast acceleration that will build the next generation..
Add urz !!!

Dear Mum, I have decided to talk to
you to let
you know my feelings. I want to know
why you
did it. My story is short. I have stayed inside you for only three
months. I
was very comfortable and warm. I felt
really
protected. I know you are a special
person because I ate the food you ate. I
longed for the
day I would see your face. Nine
months was a
long time to wait, but I was
determined to wait. I had to
be patient.
I was happy and prayed that this
meant that I would at least see you,
It took me a whole hour to die, a
whole hour for an innocent three months human being to be murdered.
I
remember the whole incidence vividly
and I keep asking myself, what I did
to deserve
that cruel death?
Why me?
Why did you do it to me? And why
was I
not given a chance to live?
I have forgiven you though I never lived to see your
face. My
journey
to back to my creator was safe
and I arrived safely.
I still love you mum; you are the only one I knew.
I remain yours; the one you
unjustifiably
expelled.
please what do you have to tell this
child??

yolanda233: Raziboi, send your address so I may invite you to chair my sister, s wedding in January! Serious, send it to mynemail cieba777@yahoo.com
Younger simply great

owk ...are u on whatsapp

8 Things No One Tells You About Marriage “…And they
lived happily
ever after” You’re smart.
You know life
is no
storybook. But
admit it:
Somewhere deep in your
subconscious
lurk romantic
visions of
Cinderella, or
maybe Julia Roberts. The images may be sketchy and a little
outdated, but you can stillmake out the
silhouette of the bride and Prince Charming
riding off into the sunset. In real life, sometimes your Disney fairy tale
ends up feeling more like a Wes Craven horror
flick — and you’re the chick who keeps falling
down and screaming for her life. I’ve been
there. Let’s face it, marriage is not for the faint
of heart. You want to believe your pure love for each other will pull you through. And it does.
But it ain’t always pretty. That may sound grim. But here’s a secret:
Sometimes it’s the least romantic parts of
marriage that have the most to teach you
about yourself, your partner, and the nature of
love. Read on for some simple truths that will
unlock the surprising treasures and pleasures in your imperfect, unstorybook, real-life love. Marriage truth #1 You will look at the person lying next to you
and wonder, Is this it? Forever? When you get married, you think that as long
as you pick the right guy — your soul mate —
you’ll be happy together until death do you
part. Then you wake up one day and realize
that no matter how great he is, he doesn’t
make you happy every moment of every day. In fact, some days you might wonder why you
were in such a hurry to get married in the first
place. You think to yourself, This is so not what
I signed up for.
Actually, it is. You just didn’t realize it the day
you and your guy were cramming wedding cake into each other’s faces, clinking
champagne glasses, and dancing the Electric
Slide. Back then you had no idea that “for
better and for worse” doesn’t kick in only
when life hands you a tragedy. Your
relationship mettle is, in fact, most tested on a daily basis, when the utter sameness of day-in/
day-out togetherness can sometimes make
you want to run for the hills. That’s when the
disappointment sneaks in, and maybe even a
palpable sense of loneliness and grief. It’s not
him. It’s just you, letting go of that sugarcoated fantasy of marriage that danced in your eyes
the day you and your beloved posed in all
those soft-focus wedding photos. You’re
learning that marriage isn’t a destination; it’s a
journey filled with equal parts excitement and
tedium. Waking up from a good dream to face the
harsh morning daylight may not seem like a
reason to celebrate. But trust me, it is. Because
once you let go of all the hokey stories of
eternal bliss, you find that the reality of
marriage is far richer and more rewarding than you ever could have guessed. Hard, yes.
Frustrating, yes. But full of its own powerful,
quiet enchantments just the same, and that’s
better than any fairy tale. MARRIAGE TRUTH #2
You’ll work harder than you ever imagined Early on, when people say, “Marriage takes
work,” you assume “work” means being
patient when he forgets to put down the toilet
seat. In your naiveté, you think that you will
struggle to accommodate some annoying
habit, like persistent knuckle cracking or flatulence. If only it were that easy. Human beings, you
may have noticed, are not simple creatures.
Your man has mysterious, unplumbed depths
— and from where he sits, you’re pretty
complicated, too. You have to learn each other
the same way that you once learned earth science or world geography. And getting
married doesn’t mean you’re done — it just
means you’ve advanced to graduate-level
studies. That’s because every time you think
you’ve mastered the material, he’ll change a bit.
And so will you. As two people grow and evolve, the real work of marriage is finding a
way to relate to and nurture each other in the
process. “It’s like losing weight,” says Andrea Harden,
45, of Buffalo, NY. “You want it to be a one-time
deal. You lost it, now just live. But then you
learn it’s a lifestyle. That’s marriage. The effort is
a forever thing.” So don’t be too hard on
yourself — or him — on those days when you feel like you’re struggling through remedial
math. MARRIAGE TRUTH #3
You will sometimes go to bed mad (and maybe
even wake up madder)
Whoever decided to tell newlyweds “Never go
to bed angry” doesn’t know what it’s like
inside a bedroom where tears and accusations fly as one spouse talks the other into a woozy
stupor until night meets the dawn. If this
scenario sounds familiar, I’ve got three words
for you: Sleep on it. You need to calm down. You need to gain
perspective. You need to just give it a rest. I’ve
found that an argument of any quality, like a
fine wine, needs to breathe. A break in the
action will help you figure out whether you’re
angry, hurt, or both, and then pinpoint the exact source. Maybe the fight that seemed to
erupt over the overflowing garbage can is
really about feeling underappreciated. Could
be you’re both stressed out at work and just
needed to unload on someone. Taking a break
will help you see that, and let go. Or maybe you really do have a legitimate disagreement to
work out. Without a time-out, sometimes a
perfectly good argument can turn into an
endless round of silly back-and-forth,
rehashing old and irrelevant transgressions as
you get more and more wound up. Even when you do manage to stay focused
and on topic, there are some fights that
stubbornly refuse to die by bedtime. And if you
stifle your real feelings just to meet some
arbitrary deadline, your marriage will surely be
the worse for it. “This was a huge lesson for me,” says Andrea. “As women we’ve been
trained to make nice. But the whole kiss-and-
make-up thing just to keep the peace was
eating me up inside. I’d let things build up
inside me until I just exploded. Now I wait a
while to get hold of myself — let the emotions settle a bit — and state my position. Even if that
means reopening the fight the next day.” MARRIAGE TRUTH #4
You will go without s*x — sometimes for a
long time — and that’s okay There are few men in the Western world sexier
than my husband. And I don’t say this because
I know he may read this article. I’ve seen
women checking him out when they think I’m
not looking. (Honestly, ladies, you don’t have
to sneak a peek. I don’t mind if you stare.) That said, there are times that I just don’t feel like
having s*x — often for reasons that have
nothing to do with Genoveso. (See? Even his
name is sexy.) I can’t lie and say this is always
okay with him. But the fact is, there are also
plenty of nights when he’s not in the mood. So maybe a few days go by when we don’t do it.
And then a few more. And…. Sexless periods are a natural part of married
life. A dry spell isn’t a sign that you’ve lost your
mojo or that you’ll never have s*x again. It just
means that maybe this week, sleep is more
important than s*x. (I don’t know about you,
but between work, 3 a.m. feedings, the PTA, soccer, T-ball, and everything else, I sometimes
crave sleep the way a pimply, hormonal
adolescent longs to cop a feel.) And don’t kid yourself; no one in America is
doing it as often as popular culture would have
you believe. Instead of worrying about how
much you think you “should” be having s*x,
keep the focus on figuring out your own
rhythm. “I used to think, What’s happened to us? We always used to be in the mood,” says
35-year-old Kim Henderson of Oakland, CA,
who’s been married for five years. “Now I
know better. Life happens. My husband just
started a new job. He has a long commute, and
we have two small children. I think we’re good.” The key is to make sure that even if you’re not
doing “it,” you’re still doing something —
touching, kissing, hugging. Personally, my
heart gets warm and mushy when my
husband rubs my feet after a long, tiring day.
He may not be anywhere near my center of gravity, but that little bit of touch and attention keeps us
connected even when we’re not having spine-
tingling s*x. MARRIAGE TRUTH #5
Getting your way is usually not as important as
finding a way to work together I can be a bit of a know-it-all. There, I said it.
It’s really not my intention to be hurtful or
brash with people I love. It’s just that a lifetime
of experience has taught me that in most
areas, at most times, I am right about most
things. What shocked me several years into my marriage, though, was the realization that the
more “right” I was, the more discontented my
husband and I were as a couple. See, oddly
enough, throughout his life Genoveso has
been under the misguided impression that he’s
right most of the time (go figure!). So we’d lock horns — often. That is, until I learned a few
things. Namely, that when it comes to certain
disagreements, there is no right or wrong —
there is simply your way of looking at things
and your husband’s. “I used to be very black-
and-white earlier in our marriage,” says Lindy
Vincent, 38, who lives in Minneapolis. “Now I see that I’m not all right and my husband is not
all wrong. There’s more gray in life than I
thought, and that’s taught me patience and the
value of compromise.” The more I get to know and appreciate my
husband for who he is, the more I respect his
positions. That doesn’t mean I always agree
with him. But I can see the value in striking a
balance that satisfies us both. And instead of
harping on how wrong he is, I can usually swallow the verbal vitriol and simply say
something like, “I see your point” or “I hadn’t
considered that.” After I sincerely
acknowledge his view, it seems to become
easier for him to hear mine. And because I
know I’m being heard, most of the time now, I don’t even want to prove how right I am
anymore. Funny how that works, isn’t it? MARRIAGE TRUTH #6
A great marriage doesn’t mean no conflict; it
simply means a couple keeps trying to get it
right Maybe you think that because of my newfound
wisdom, Genoveso and I never fight anymore.
Ha! As important as it is to strike a balance, it’s
also important to have a big, fat fight every
now and then. Because when you fight, you
don’t just raise your voices; you raise real — sometimes buried — issues that challenge you
to come to a clearer understanding of you,
your man, and your relationship. I wouldn’t
give up our fights for anything in the world,
because I know in the end they won’t break
us; they’ll only make us stronger. MARRIAGE TRUTH #7
You’ll realize that you can only change yourself Ever seen the ’80s sci-fi cult classic Making Mr.
Right? When the stylish heroine, played by Ann
Magnuson, is hired to teach a robot how to act
like a human, she seizes the chance to create a
perfect guy. A hotshot commercial whiz, she
uses her marketing prowess to shape John Malkovich’s android character into her
personal version of the ideal man — sensitive,
eager to please, and willing to listen. There is a bit of that makeover fantasy in all of
us — something that makes us believe we can
change the person we love, make him just a
little bit closer to perfect. We may use support
and empathy or shouts and ultimatums, but
with dogged conviction we take on this huge responsibility, convinced we’re doing the right
thing. Whatever our motives, the effort is exhausting.
Transforming a full-grown man — stripping
him of decades-old habits, beliefs, and
idiosyncrasies — is truly an impossible task.
And you will come to realize, sooner than later
if you’re lucky, that it is far easier to change the way you respond to him. MARRIAGE TRUTH #8
As you face your fears and insecurities, you will
find out what you’re really made of I’ve got issues. Trust issues. Control issues. And
others, I’m sure, that I’ve yet to fully discover. I
guess I’ve always known I wasn’t perfect. But
in more than a decade of marriage, I’ve been
smacked upside the head with the cold, hard
evidence. There were clues when Genoveso and I were
dating, especially with the trust thing. Early on,
I was supersuspicious of him. He used to say
things like, “I’ll call you at 8.” Then, just to try to
trip me up, he’d call at 8. I knew he was up to
something, I just couldn’t figure out what. The same kinds of experiences followed after the
wedding. Except occasionally he would
actually mess up. And I had no sense of scale
when it came to rating his offenses; everything
was a major violation. Whether he teased me
about a new haircut or came home late, I seethed for days and even let thoughts of
divorce creep into my head. I figured, if he
loved me — really and truly — this stuff
wouldn’t happen. I’d like to be able to say that this irrational
behavior lasted only a few months and I
eventually worked it out. Kind of, sort of, is
closer to the truth. After years of looking
deeply into my soul and talking to good
friends and the best sister a girl could ever have, I’ve come to recognize certain things
about myself. Not to get all Dr. Phil about it, but
I’ve had to examine my history with an
emotionally distant dad and a strong-willed
mom and face up to all the ways, both good
and bad, that those relationships have affected how I approach my marriage. I still struggle as a work in progress. But I am
completely clear in the knowledge that many
of the deepest frustrations in your relationship
are an opportunity for you to confront
yourself. That can be difficult to accept — after
all, it’s so much more comforting to keep a running tab of your hubby’s deficits and tell
yourself that his failings are the only thing
standing between you and a better marriage.
But if you let it, this bumpy journey toward self-
awareness can be one of the more fulfilling
rewards of a committed, long-term relationship — you’ll learn to love your quirks and be
compassionate toward yourself, just as you’re
learning to do with him. That’s the strange beauty of marriage: It’s full
of hard times and hard lessons that no one can
ever prepare you for. But in the end, those are
the things that give richness to your life
together — and make your love even deeper
and stronger than when it began.

lipz..on crack..**talk**..on front page..mehn..datz dope..

wow...av seen thingz...pple do say aba is very dirty but i do see big business man and woman.. From lagoz.ph,uyo,calaber etc buying thngz and the are even coming every day..xo guyz letz share our experience.....what do u thnk

YES!! Every body hav chioce..i knw..but in termz of galz..i want a beautiful ,slim gal dat can last long in s*x[akwa ibom] with a good character...xo friendz tell me the one u want ...Dnt abuse any body

my fellow nairalanders...since i came 2 this world all the tall galz i knw dnt av straight legz...plz share ur experiencemy fellow nairalanders...since i came 2 this world all the tall galz i knw dnt av straight legz...plz share ur experiencemy fellow nairalanders...since i came 2 this world all the tall galz i knw dnt av straight legz...plz share ur experience

NEPA=Never Expect Power Always
PHCN=Please Hold Candle Near
That's the full meaning of 0ur country's
power supply body...i d lie?

i can remember back in the dayz when galz were scarce ,and giving out fake numbers but nw [hahahahaha] galz are many..wenever i meet a gal the next thing she do is to give me her number..so wat am asking is...are there places in nigeria were galz still give out fake numbers

The Oxford Dictionary defines ASUU. 1) ASUU: A Union.
2) ASUUOLOGY: The study of ASUU.
3) ASUUCRAT: A member of ASUU.
4) ASUUCRACY: Government of ASUU
plus Federal Government minus the
students. 5) ASUUFEVA: Effects
of ASUU on students.
6) ASUUNISTIC: The act of behaving in
ASUU way.
7) ASUUDITE: A person who doesn’t
believe in ASUU. ASUUING: demanding and negotiating
in
ASUU's manner.
9) ASUUNDER: Consequences of ASUU
strike.
10) ASUUSTRIKER: A person who demostrates for ASUU.
11) ASUULATOR: The war between
ASUU and the senators.
12) ASUUMANIAC: Someone who loves
ASUU.
13) ASUUPHOBIA: The fear of ASUU.
14) ASUUCIDE: Act of
killing an Asucrat by accident.
15) ASUUTIAN: A victim of ASUU's
activities.
16) ASUUFÈCTO: a baby born by a student during ASUU.
17) ASUUGENERIAN: A student who
spends 7 years in sch instead of 4 years
due to ASUU strike.
18) ASUUIST: A lecturer or a group of
lecturer who does not support ASUU but hopes to benefit from the union.
19) ASUUMONGER: Someone who keep
spreading rumours about the activities
of ASUU.
20) ASUUNOMICS: A student who
develops business ideas during ASUU strike..#razi

A man died & goes to hell!
There he finds that there is a different
hell
for each country and decides he'll pick
the
least painful to spend his eternity. He goes to the German hell & asks,
"What
do they do here? He was told "first they
put you in an electric chair for an hour,
then they lay you on a bed of nails for
another hour, thereafter the German devil
comes in and whips you for the rest of
the
day.
The man does not like the sound of that
at all, so he moves on. He checks out the USA
hell as well as the Russian hell and
many
more. He discovers that they are all
similar
to that of German hell. Thereafter, he came to the Nigerian hell
and founds that there is a long queue
of people waiting to get in aΩ̴̩̩̩̥d̶̲̥̅ he was
amazed! He asked, What do they do
here?
He was told that "first they put you in an
electric chair for an hour, then they lay
you
on a bed of nails for another hour. The
Nigerian devil comes in & whips you for
the rest of the day. But that is exactly the same as all the
others, why are there so many people
waiting to get in? Asked the man.
A concerned fellow called him aside
and
said, "Because there is never any electricity, so
the electric chair doesn't work. The
nails were paid for but were never
supplied by
the contractor, therefore, the bed is
comfortable to sleep on aΩ̴̩̩̩̥d̶̲̥̅ the Nigerian devil used to be a civil servant,
so he comes in, signs his time sheet and
went
back home for other business. HOWEVER, IT PAYS TO BE A NIGERIAN. Wish i will make it in the front page....

Nowdayz things happen..but the question is [1] FOR THE MEN.. cAN U MARRY A WOMAN OLDER THAN U... [2] FOR THE WOMEN cAN U MARRY UR JUNIOR?? apart from the world is developing..me i cnt do it oooooooooooooooo....So tell me wat u think abt it??

my fellow nairalanders ...i need ur help.. i have a girl frnd dat i love so much..but diaz another gal..dat am seeing[..mehn de gal is beautiful ] have tried 2 talk with de gal..but she have been rejecting ma gesture..xo diz aftanoon i s*x the gal in ma dream..am xo worried..wat should i do.. HELP!!!

: . Queen Elizabeth II of England does
not hug anyone, she only shakes hand
with people. But in 2009, she broke
every protocol and hugged president
Obama's wife 'Michelle Obama'. Fashola
broke protocol to appoint an Igbo man (Ben Akabuaeze) as a commissioner in
Lagos state. Same happened to Esther,
when the king broke protocols to see
her. Jacob broke protocols to become
the first son. Pharaoh broke protocols
to make Joseph(an ex- prisoner ) his 2nd in command. MY PRAYER FOR ALL
MY FRIENDS THIS DAY IS Protocols will
be broken for you to be celebrated,
decorated, blessed, promoted, uplifted
and increased in Jesus Name!

what will u do if u find out dat the 3 kidz ur av been training for 25 yearz are nt ur kidz?