₦airaland Forum

ThuGnificenX:
You and your wife have to try ad much ad possible not to ask for help from family when having any financial constrains. U have to teach her to manage and suffer with u. She needs to respect ur marriage instead of her running back to her mother for help all the time...


Op I will blame you solely for what is going on in ur marriage now but it's not too late to turn it around...

First person u need to discipline is ur wife...

My brother how do u discipline a woman who has become something else due to her mother's advice.. do you know the mother boldly met my older sister and told her that my wife isn't my slave and I shouldn't expect her to do laundry, or cook.. that nothing stops me from taking bother her cloths and mine to wash... I was flabbergasted when my sis told me. This is a woman who would call me to come and bath a day old baby saying she works and couldn't bath the child.. Then got angry when I insisted that there was no point for them being there if I had to come over to bath my new born I'd rather do it in the solace of my house while my wife recuperates

eyinjuege:
Is your wife also not working?

Discuss with your wife that you don't want her running to her parents for monetary help. That also means you have to buckle up, and source for more funds legitimately. Things are tough everywhere now though.

Your mum in law has enough leewey to truly feel she's paying the bills for you guys, cos who knows how much your wife collects from her. The problem though is that she's not really a supportive parent, and one of the worst in-laws anyone could have.

A lot lot of adults at one point of the other have always run to their parents for help, and nobody gets to hear about it. Your case isn't much different.

Anyway, solution- Tell your wife, and let her know you mean it that you don't want her running to her mum for anything like food for your family and kids. In short, make sure there's always food for the kids and your wife at home, change the children's schools to more affordable ones. Provided the basic needs are met at home, any extra your wife runs to her parents for is due to her own greed/ comfort.

Thanks I usually make sure we purchase in bulk in the house, and the children's school isn't extravagant but it's good. I find that when I make bulk purchases she becomes wasteful. At a point rather than for her mother to buy things like fish or meat, she would come to my house and go to the freezer and remove what she wants, my own mother has never done that.

delishpot:
Treat her as you would expect your wife to treat your mothers excesses if that was your mom in question.
Then your wife should handle her mom as she expects you to handle yours if your mom was giving her headache in her home.
Besides, you do not have a right to ban your mil from coming to see her daughter. You can only make her stop coming by putting up a cold attitude with her. That will make her think twice before coming. But to out rightly tell her never to step foot in her daughters home is bad. Should your wife also do such to your mom if it was your mother misbehaving like this?


But why wait until you budget something before you allow your wife to have them? Sometimes we should learn to make sacrifices and place things in order off importance. If I budget to buy shoes but my wife later finds that she needs to a get a new handset since hers got spoilt without warning, I shouldn't tell her to wait until I make budget for her phone before we buy a new one. If She needs it awithout any doubt and the shoe money can buy it, then replacing her handset cones first. You both need to sit down and plan your lives as a unit.

U and I are saying the same thing, budgeting is prioritizing... when things happen that are necessary u sacrifice, but not on whims

psucc:
Not the best option as she may have an occasion to blackmail you.

The whole thing lies on you as the man. Do your best to hold up your heads and maintain your place as the man. When she discovered her 'advice' are not considered nor implemented over time, she will give up.

Play the man. Don't do anything to please anybody. Plan your expenses well against tomorrow.

When I do that and my wife want something I say it's not budgeted, she goes to her mom and that's why the woman now feels she pays my bills according to her

Nova15:
its simple.

stop her from coming to your house if her purpose is to ruin your family

period!

If I stop her from coming I can't stop my wife from seeing her and advising her wrongly

My mother in law is ruining my marriage, controlling my wife and trying to impose her will on me. Yesterday she came by my house while I was out and met my sister who is visiting, and lied horrendously to her about her doing things for my wife and I. I was shocked when my sister told me, yes things have been tight, but not so tight we can't live reasonably... I don't know what to do at this point. She even told my sister that I'mshould be cleaning my house and doing the laundry

Can I pay 1.2 for this ride

Can it go for 400

There are a lot of men in nigeria like that or even better ripped but you ladies prefer men with flab for what you call "obvious reasons" look at the average bricklayer, iron bender,carpenter, mechanic, gardener, and laborer, you'll find that but since you ladies wouldn't give them the time of day, most men spend less time trying to get that look and more trying to get that paper

Brothers am I right or wrong

Is this car available

Is this still avaolable

Still available?

Still available?

Can I pay 500

What's the best price boss

Bro can I pay 250

Bro, what's your best price

How does one get out of a bad marriage, kids are involved.
How does one start over
Where does one start over
Can one start over

Mibellconsult:
Dear fellas,
The soft copies have been sent to your email addresses. Contact us for more details
mibellagroconsult@gmail.com
mibellexport@gmail.com

08098271227

Thanks

I didn't get an email with soft copy.. Rovidltd@gmail.com

Where in benin are you?

Interior pics, will 300 fly

Look sometimes women jump to conclusions and never give their man the opportunity to try to explain events. In a case I am very privy to, the wife left to drop off kids at school, husband was in the living room.. on going to the inner house he met house maid with trousers exposing her undies, he assumed his wife didn't see otherwise she would have said something... so he says "na so u dey dress when madam dey.. when she come I go tell am say this na how u dress.".. she said her cloth was bad and proceeded to show him that she tied the trouser with a rope... he found an old belt and gave it to her to wear.. and showed her the belt hole as she was about to tie it as rope again... he then reached and took thread, he had asked his wife for thread that morning they didn't find it... the left to look for needle... the girl came and said she wanted to go get cloths from the back yard.. and she didn't know how to open the gate... he open it for her, and let her out... his wife returned and housemaid went to her crying that he tried to sleep with her and she had to run out to escape him.. thus began a new saga in his marital problems.... u see sometimes we are innocent of what you women assume we are guilty of just because we have a 3rd leg

Pls send soft copy to rovidltd@gmail.com

https://www.wsws.org/en/articles/2007/08/nige-a09.html
BRITISH BORN HAROLD SMITH CONFESSED &
APOLOGISE FOR MANIPULATING PRE-
INDEPENDENT CENSUS AND ELECTION TO
FAVOUR NORTH.
The man Harold Smith is not new in Nigerian history. He is one of the architects of colonial foundation that midwife Nigerian independence in 1960.
I met him in a meeting three weeks ago where he opened up a bit about the lingering problem in Africa especially; Nigeria unbalanced protracted social political situations. We asked if he could make this known to the media. His response was
“I am in my 80s now; I have agreed but in the past ‘they’ did not want me to say anything, but now I don’t want to go to my grave without telling the truth about the atrocities perpetrated in Africa by the colonialists.
Brothers and sisters; on Ben TV last Thursday, Harold Smith was on a program to reveal what went behind the scene before the independence.
The Oxford University graduate had this to say
about his role in Nigeria pre and after independence era.
‘Our agenda was to completely exploit Africa.
Nigeria was my duty post. When we assessed Nigeria, this was what we found in the southern region; strength, intelligence, determination to succeed, well established history, complex but focused life style, great hope and aspirations… the
East is good in business and technology, the west is good in administration and commerce, law and
medicine, but it was a pity we planned our agenda to give power “at all cost” to the northerner. They seemed to be submissive and silly of a kind. Our mission was accomplished by destroying the opposition at all fronts. The west led in the fight for the independence, and was punished for asking for freedom.
They will not rule Nigeria!
Harold Smith confessed that the Census results
were announced before they were counted. Despite seeing vast land with no human but cattle in the north, we still gave the north 55 million instead of 32 Million. This was to be used
to maintain their majority votes and future power
bid. He stated that the West without Lagos was the most populous in Nigeria at that time but we ignored that.
The north was seriously encouraged to go into the military. According to him, they believe that the south may attend western education, but future leaders will always come from military background. Their traditional rulers were to be
made influential and super human. The northerners were given accelerated promotions both in the military and civil service to justify their superiority over the south. Everything was to work against the south.
We truncated their good plan for their future. “I was very sorry for the A.G; it was a great party too much for African standard. We planned to destroy Awolowo and Azikwe well, the west and the east and sowed a seed of discord among
them”.
We tricked Azikwe into accepting to be president
having known that Balewa will be the main man with power. Awolowo has to go to jail to cripple his genius plans for a greater Nigeria.
However, Harold Smith justified theI British agenda of colonialism in Nigeria, which he believed was originally to help build Africa after the ruins of slave trade, but lamented that the
British only looked after themselves and not after
Nigerian interest. The British really let Nigeria down.When I see Nigerian been accused of fraud and from what I saw on the streets of Lagos; the British were worst fraudsters. Looking at the northern leaders now he said, “If they have any agenda in Nigeria at all, sadly it is only for the north, and nothing for Nigeria. He
stated that the British look after the British people
and this is so all over the world. He said the time
has come now to see people of intelligent minds with an open and inclusive agenda for all Nigerians in power…people who will really look
after Nigerians large population…but ”I still
curiously and sorrowfully see now that the British
has not let go of Nigeria…her wealth,. her potentials, her future. He opined that the
Caucasian people now
assert themselves as the keeper of the “New Age”
keys. He therefore said that it is only logical for
Europeans to maintain their position of power, scientific superiority, economic exploitation, they must continue to perpetuate their lies and falsehoods and this is the most unkindest cut of
all in relation to Nigeria situation!
According to him, Nigeria, a great nation was crippled not because of military juntas or corrupt leaders alone but by the British and American fear of Nigeria great future. He confessed, “The fear of the place that will be our ‘dumping ground’ really occupied our minds”.
Some of the things he said were not new to Nigerians or to the whole world but hearing it from the horse’s mouth is quite revealing and
established more reality zones. He finally submitted that the colonial masters have caused havoc while they were in Africa, and planted
timed bombs when they finally left. What we see
since independence, the administration of new
internal colonial masters by fellow Nigerians
holding sway
in power is doing more damage to Nigeria.
Instead of detonating the time bombs planted by
the British, the north is planting mines.
He added that ‘It was duty to carry out all of the above and I was loyal to my country.
Nigerians should try to be loyal to their country leaders and followers alike. Love your country.
You have got the potentials to be great again and the whole world knows this’.
I am sorry for the above evil done to Nigeria.
I can’t say sorry enough……

How do you get this gelatin feed to float.. plus I find it disintegrated in water when I feed with the one you guys pletized

Ragner:
You Made her Lie to you. Why would you Tell a Grown up to Quit Her Job Simply because you're Suspicious of Something that Might not even Exist?

I told her to quit after she lied and I found out

@ smellymouth some people actually have already commented with maturity.. come to think of it you are the only one who hasn't said anything reasonable.. for or against

Hmmph.... I did things because of my woman.. she had someone in school who made her sit on the floor in public.. I looked for him found him and made him do the same... the beat him unconscious... that was the last time I ever did anything against a man over a woman
I don't know if I'm heart broken or just crazy pissed.. drinking right now.. again.. the pain feels physical.. I broke a security door yesterday.. hit it so hard my wedding ring cut into my flesh

5

DrTizzle:
There's no going back here, you guys already have two kids, so pretty much, I fnk the both of you need to sit down and talk things out like real adults. More importantly, I don't fnk it was a wise move telling her to stop working..Even though you have the power to do so, as her hubby, but the best thing to have done, is let her know how much you trust her, despite your suspicions of anything going on. And most of all, just be calm about the whole thing. Women have are very susceptible to men with patience, slow to anger and extremely caring(Always complimenting and rendering advises and telling them how much they mean to you)....Most men only focus on the secondary duties of husband-hood, which is providing for the woman physically. They always leave out the woman's emotional satisfaction, which is supposed to be primary. If you can win a woman's emotional state of well being, you can win her physical and mental state of well being as well. If you had stopped doing all the above, i fnk it's high time you start again. No matter how roguery she might be going, because you are doing all the above, her conscience won't give her a peace of mind. But if you want to act all bossy and powerful, especially when she's gone to school and has a qualification almost equally intelligent and successful has you, then you'd have to be very meticulous with your approach, otherwise bare the consequences. If she lied to you about resigning, then be sure, shes hiding more secretes from you. And if a woman can't be completely honest to her man, then it means someone else out there has won her trust, which dosen't add up, because you are betrothed to her. The only rational explanation is this, someone else is exhibiting all the stated above to her in and she's living in the moment. Right from d days of EVE in the bible, it is clear that women can be very emotional and caught up in the moment. Honestly, I strongly believe you gise can sort things out. Forgiveness is not only to your neighbours or friends,but also to your family. And she is your family, not just some woman that bore you children. Remember the prodigal son, despite his actions, he was accepted back by his father. Your wife is your family too. Most men just see women as one that bares child for them, No she's also your family, the same way your two lovely kids are family to you, is the same way your wife should be too. And no matter how your two children hurt you, I'm sure you won't leave them, not to talk of disowning them. If your wife is not divorcing you or anything, don't be the one to do so. Again, Let the love and forgiveness of the almighty God be shared abroad in your heart. IJN. Stay blessed.

Thanks.. but the lie about a relationship.. BTW her younger bro actually told me the guy is her ex... she says I lied about it.. but that's what he said before I found out she didn't resign

Ragner:
You want to get Divorced Because your Wife Refused To Resign From her Job?

I see

Matured People talk to this Matured Man Biko

Please read what I wrote.. I actually don't want to divorce.. but with the lies and what seems apparent..