₦airaland Forum

alexov:
Neither am i. So whatever you say.

alexov:
Well Stark's company makes less money than Wayne's but the Wayne family is very philanthropic. So you can see why iron man is richer.

alexov:
Lol.... Why do you think so?

tdayof:
Tesla

Mikeshiangala:
Where is infinix hot 3 lte,Tecno camon C9,moto G4 plus, Bush Spira E3X, LG X Screen,Oppo F1,Honor 5c, Sony Xperia E5, ZTE Blade V7 Lite,Moto E & Vodafone Smart Prime 7?

Suspect33:
lagosians, whr are we, our boy from badagry needs us oh, make we no fall im hand, pls text 'vote miyonse' to 32052

Amusaopeyemi:
If T-boss is like this in real life too, it won't be good o.
That girl is an unfortunate person.

jtwest:
wait! U guys know all their names already, I know faces but am giving them my own nicks till I get accustome to them o.
1. machoman red socks- otherwise known as ekemini
2. nose ringer- otherwise known as queen of the rings or d bull
3. chef boy- follow follow boy(he seems to follow d gurls about)
4. plantainshun boy- his hair looks like plantain plantation, d boy teaching them to dance.
5. Mrs mbokani- d gurl wit d Kenyan hairstyle.
who else....?? see am tired already

mr1759:
son send me your prayer request.
I need to pray for you

mr1759:
son send me your prayer request. I need to pray for you

mr1759:
son send me your prayer request.
I need to pray for you

mr1759:
you're Yoruba and put Fulani matter for your hollow head, you need deliverance, u r a confused person

mr1759:
Yoruba Fulani am deeply sorry for you

mr1759:
Fulani herdsman I hear sir
in fact celebrate and congratulate you for wreaking havoc on the ppl of southern kaduna

mr1759:



am sure she study Islamic maths

because nor be the maths wey know for south them they do up north.

imagine quota system that allow a northerner that score low in waec/jamb to secure admission why we in south can't use such score for ourselves here in south

a system that allow a northerner who has no certificate to rule Nigeria, and still call him an educated person

if I have my way I will probe this woman professorship.

LorDBolton:
From the jersey that's kaizerchiefs
From the huge attendance it's gotta be last year's soweto derby
Ergo that's south Africa
And that's a dumb hoe

blackbriar:
You get to say things like “Oh, it’s in my foreign bank account.” Nobody needs to know you only have $1,000 in it!
Financial diversification: If you keep all of your money in a single country, that country’s banking system could run into issues, confiscate your savings, or put a freeze on your accounts. Not cool!
Currency diversification: Should your home currency suddenly become devalued overnight, keeping some of your money in various currencies (or gold!) is a safeguard against having your savings severely diminished or inflated away.
Banking diversification: Not only do banking systems and national currencies fail, but specific banks can fail and do go bankrupt. By keeping your money in multiple banks scattered throughout the globe, you’re less likely to lose everything should the sh** hit the fan.

You don’t need to be a millionaire to have a foreign bank account. Heck, you don’t even need to leave the comfort of your home:

Some banks in certain countries (HSBC in Hong Kong, or banks in Australia – as of Aug 2014) will allow you to open bank accounts as a US citizen by filling out the required paperwork and paying the required fees.
Other banks might require you to actually visit the bank branch and meet with the bank in person. Note: this method can be MUCH faster (though more expensive) than filling out proper paperwork and mailing it back and forth.

Both Singapore and Hong Kong are the recommended locations for international Jason Bournes, as they have a history of financial stability, a high level of liquidity, and general political stability.

Just remember to file the proper paperwork with your own government come tax time!

TOTAL COST FOR THIS SKILL: $1,000-$10,000 deposit depending on the bank plus applicable fees.
Blend in like a local

Bourne nicky

To reference another Nerd Classic, remember when Indiana Jones (falsely) talks about the ability of his friend Marcus to blend in?

Indiana Jones

Well, Jason Bourne can actually DO that. I’m reminded of my friend Benny who was able to blend in while in Egypt, despite being a relatively pale Irishman!

Here’s how he did it:

My hat, “fabulous” shoes, video camera, whacky t-shirts, bright shorts, backpack and any fun accessories I may have, all stayed at home. I shaved my goatee to a moustache, cut my hair shorter, put a jumper/sweater and heavy jeans on even though it was a sunny day, and wore my less comfortable dull black shoes.

While walking, I kept a confident posture, and when I met anyone I would not shake their hand firmly (Egyptians have the least firm handshake I’ve ever come across), but let my arm flop around a bit, and I’d walk fast enough.

For my first days, I definitely noticed that people would glance at me as they walked past me because I’d be standing out as a foreigner or simply visually different. It’s just human nature that the more different something is, the more it gets our attention. If you have weird hair, weird clothes, weird equipment around your neck and walk weird… then you are going to attract attention, plane and simple.

So when I say that I want to blend in, I don’t claim that people will all think I’m Egyptian, especially those looking at photos of me online when they already know I’m Irish – it’s about standing out less.

The same is true for body language and gestures. While you’re in a foreign country, notice how others act, what sort of mannerisms they use, and what their body language is like.

The more you can imitate a local, the more likely you’ll be to actually blend in, avoiding the watchful eyes of people looking for trouble!

TOTAL COST FOR THIS SKILL: $0
Be Bourne

Bourne

Follow the above and you’re well on your way to blending into ANY situation, escaping any danger, and vanishing without a trace. Take that pursuers!

Now, there are some other great skills possessed by Monsieur Bourne that could also come in handy, which I’ve highlighted below:

Know your surroundings and assess potential threats: Any time Jason enters a situation, he’s always assessing the potential dangers, necessary escape routes, and anybody that could be suspicious or pose a threat. This is what Mac talks about in It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia, but you know…actually having some skill.
Work on memory recall: Practice memorizing license plate numbers as you walk down the street. Step it up further: learn to memorize a deck of cards quickly, and apply that talent to other situations.
Evasive Driving School: In case you ever need to properly evade a pursuer in a vehicle, they actually have really cool driving schools you can attend. Check “Evasive driving school + your state” and see where you can train.
Emergency/First Aid: Learn about proper disaster training and emergency first aid by doing a search for an Community Emergency Response Team (CERT) Program in your area. At the very least, taking a CPR/First Aid class could be the difference between life and death while living off the grid!
Expert Marksman: Jason is one hell of a shot, and you can be too. Search for a local gun range, and speak to them about basic handgun safety, shooting classes, and more.
Pick your way out of handcuffs: My friend Brett over at Art of Manliness has a handy (pun intended) guide on how to get out of cuffs should you find yourself locked up.

So, I realize this is a MONSTER article, but hopefully it provided you with plenty of entertainment and education as to what life is like as a real life Jason Bourne. If you’re anything like me, you’ll probably want to put on Moby’s “Extreme Ways” and walk down the street like a badass