₦airaland Forum

olaide92:
A MUST READ FOR ALL MEN AND WOMEN

This is one of the best write ups I have read in recent years. Be patient enough to read it to the end. I am sure you


Copied from Rasheedah Unachuwu Akano

#copied#
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Everyday, especially with the rise of social media, the menfolk are bashed and branded “evil”. We often make generalisations about the whole “specie” based on isolated experiences.

Recently, a Nollywood actress wrote that “all men cheat”. My intention is not to write a rejoinder to the referenced article, neither is it an attempt to repudiate the assertion. However, in my moment of solitude, I asked if truly something is wrong with us as men.

Before making my case, please permit me to share three independent events that will help connect the dots with you.

Event 1
Recently, at a party, I was having a conversation with a group of childhood girlfriends. One of them, Omolara, was deeply concerned about the posture her nine-year-old son is beginning to assume in life. According to her, he is becoming too “SWEET” for a man, (Sweetness in her dictionary is a lovey-dovey, soft, simple and good man). She was actually seeking my opinion on how to help him ‘toughen up’. As I struggled to make sense of her request, I asked why she wanted to alter the poor boy’s personality and to my utmost bewilderment, Bidemi, Shewa and Zainab, all other three ladies sitting with us attacked me with an intense “Jezebelic” venom. I left the party wondering to myself if I was some sort of a novice, probably naïve or worse still, archaic in my thinking.

Event 2
A few months ago, I got a phone call from a very dear friend. She asked if I could recommend the service of a good lawyer for her. Since she worked in my former constituency (i.e. the Nigerian banking industry), I erroneously assumed that she was about to resign her job to register and start a new business, Alas, my very good-natured, homely gentle and caring Bolanle wants to get a divorce. The reason: Bros has been cheating on her with two of his ex-es and a new kid on the block in his office.

Disturbed at the distraught sound of her voice, we agreed to meet up at a nearby restaurant on my invitation. As she walked towards me, the pain from her countenance would best be described as the percussion to the symphony of a shattered heart; in one word: BROKEN.
I watched as she broke down in tears whilst she narrated her experience. She had led a chaste and responsible life as a single chic and had been a faithful and dutiful wife. Her world was tearing apart not only because she caught Le-boo red-handed, but, because he rubbed his affairs in her face and was too prideful to show any form of remorse.
Secondly, because NOBODY was in support of her divorce. Everyone, including her darling mum and numero uno confidante, encouraged her to her stay on in the marriage and their unanimous reason is that, all over the world and particularly in Africa, philandering is in the DNA of men.

As I listened to the societal justification for her to remain in the marriage, I realised that, somehow in our social construct, we may have bought into an unconscious “conspiracy theory” that has no empirical, cognitive, scriptural, or moral validation.

Event 3
The first time I saw Iyanya’s ‘Oreo’ music video, (no disrespect to the talented dude) my first instinct was fear for the ‘boy child’. I reckoned that excessive exposure to those sort of videos in his formative years can catalyse his inclination towards a ‘vulgar’ future expressed in poor character traits such as objectifying women, multiple dating, infidelity, lack of respect for women, cheating, polygamy et al. You can then imagine the emotion I felt when I walked into a friend’s house as the video was playing on one of the music channels on DSTV and right before Daddy and Mummy, was their six-year-old son watching and singing along without parental check.

Here’s my pain:
In most cases, all through her life, the girl child was trained to be contrite, to be meek, to cook, to serve the king as a queen, she was generally prepared for life. The question is, who prepared the boy child for life? Who bothered to help him discover his theme and guide him on how to navigate his way through the tides of life? Who spent time to teach him how to care for a pregnant wife? Who counselled him on how to be a gentleman?

As a teenager, I recall listening to a conversation about the girl child losing her innocence. For the girl child it is a taboo, but in most cases, for the boy child it is acceptable. I have seen where an African mother defended her boy child in a case of fornication gone wrong, but the girl child was stigmatized for the same “crime”.
In some homes, the boy child finished eating his meals and the Mother ensured that the girl child packed up his plate and washed them. It was forbidden for him to do the dishes because he was either the only son, the last boy or the first boy (as some Yoruba mothers will say, “Baba yin ni”).

All his life, the boy child has been told that he is the champion and that it is a sign of weakness to be vulnerable. In some parts of Africa, he is the preferred gender, the one to carry on the family name (‘o ma se o’). There is nothing wrong with building up a child’s self-esteem but there must be a balanced approach to it, the sad effect of these alpha-male doctrines and masculine philosophies is that it messes up the child’s belief system and often times he loses the power of believing right.

The world tells the boy child that he is the VICTOR whereas he is actually the VICTIM.
He is the victim of a society that lied to him that he is superior to the girl child (that is probably why some men may never be able to handle a super successful, upwardly- mobile woman).
He is the victim of a system that deceived him; that it is a sign of weakness for a man to cry.
He is the victim of a system that gave him a false sense of dominance over his female counterpart.
He is the victim of a system where his own mother concurred to the sinister doctrine that polygamist tendencies is an innate trait of the masculine gender.
He is the victim of a system that had no strict boundaries for his social conduct and contriteness whereas the girl was prepared for life and marriage.
He is the victim of our cultural flaws and idiosyncrasies.
He is the victim of a faulty foundation of a failed society.

Here’s how I see it:
It is our responsibility to show him (the boy child) the masterplan of his creator.
To be strong at heart yet not afraid to admit his weaknesses and cry if need be
To be a leader yet with the humility to be a servant and have control over himself
To be courageous yet not afraid to open to his errors in the days of adversity
To be strong yet meek
To be swift yet patient
To be sweet yet wise
To be kind yet firm
To be wise, prudent, caring and focused
To be honourable in the place of chastity
To build the capacity to commit to his words and not renege on his promise of love
To respect the WOMAN, her GOD, her will and her body
To demonize feminine abuse and revere her emotions, her spirit and her essence
To own his story, his will, his calling, his purpose, his family and his life
A man who will treat all women with dignity and not exploit her vulnerabilities even when the latter so easily give in.

Let’s help develop a breed of perfect gentlemen
Let’s help the boys grow to become Men after God’s heart!

To young mothers with growing boys, teach them how to handle the needs of a woman from a woman’s perspective, it is obvious that men don’t get it as much……(Family Customer Service 101)

We may not be able to change the global stock of men, but in our little corner, with our sons, our nephews, our cousins, our protégées, our godsons, our neighbour’s sons. We can build ONE man that will affect a nation.
A sage once told me: it is easier to build up growing children than to repair broken adults..
came across this and felt I should share and post.

Feel free to share on groups. So we can start building the kind of men we hope to see.
coined from

Fleshly:
Olagunju
PROPHETIC BOMBSHELL! Biafra 70% accomplished –Prophet Olagunju 1
BY OUR REPORTER ON JANUARY 3, 2016 COVER


■ Says Nigeria’s break-up imminent

STORIES BY OLAKUNLE OLAFIOYE

The agitation for self-de­termination by pro-Bi­afran groups may eventually climax in reality if the p r o p h e c i e s of a popular Ibadan-based pastor, Prophet Wale Olagun­ju, Presiding Bishop of Di­vine Seed of God Chapel Ministries, are any­thing to go by.

Prophet Olagunju w h o s e predic­t i o n about the vic­tory of Presi­dent Mohammadu Buhari in the 2015 general election was widely ap­plauded for its accuracy on both the outcome of the poll and the margin of votes between the APC presidential candidate, Mohamma­du Buhari and other candidates, also predicted that the North will remain in power for the next 12 years just as he foretold the possibility of Nigeria’s eventual break-up.

Prophet Olagunju, in a 51-point prophecy for the Year 2016 said the agitation for Biafra nation is 70 per­cent accomplished and advised the President to be cautious in handling the issue.

Below are his prophecies for the nation:

■ During one of my prayers for the nation, I saw Buhari in thick darkness trying to bail out the country from disaster. God said, we should com­mence prayer now for the President that God should rise in his defense and rescue him from the antics of wicked and corrupt people.

■ God said we should commence serious prayer for Buhari that God should grant him good health and long life, so that he will be able to ac­complish God’s purpose.

■ Almighty God warned that Pres­ident Buhari should be careful not to allow favoritism, religious sentiment, nepotism and regional corruption to spoil his government and make him lose the love Nigerians demonstrated in voting for him.

■ Buhari should be careful so that what happened to Murtala Mu­hammed will not happen to him. He should rely more on God for his se­curity and should not joke with the physical.

■ For equating former President Jonathan with our Lord Jesus Christ, God said Fayose’s days as Ekiti State governor are numbered. God said He has torn his government and has given it to whom He wants and the govern­ment will henceforth be moving from one crisis to another until he gets out of office.

■ The controversial governor of Ekiti State, Ayodele Fayose, will end up in failure if he fails to pray now, for God revealed him to me in handcuff.

■ God said He will, beginning from 2016 begin to vent His anger against those false prophets and pastors using demonic powers to perform miracles because they are not sent by Him.

■ God says for legalizing the sin of fornication and adultery, He will stir up serious adversity and dreaded disease against the American nation very soon.

■ God says the end of Boko Haram in the northern part of Nigeria is at hand.

■ Failure of President Buhari to set up a balanced national confab and restructure Nigeria will pave way for another militant group that will terror­ize the nation.

■ It will take the greatest miracle of the century for the current Senate President Bukola Saraki to complete his term as Nigeria’s Senate President.

■ The time for Seyi Makinde to rule Oyo State as governor is at hand as revealed to me by Almighty God, but he needs fervent prayer.

■ In Ondo State, Governor Mim­iko and the ruling Peoples Democrat­ic Party PDP should forget ruling the state in the next governorship election.

■ Rapture is very near.

■ Nigerians should pray for Oba of Benin and the Olubadan of Ibadan Land.

■ Break-up is imminent in Nigeria. Another generation is coming that will break Nigeria without any war.

■ There is going to be retrench­ment in NTA and FRCN.

■ Nigerians should commence serious prayer now to forestall death of prominent emirs, obas and some eminent Nigerians in 2016. Nigerians should also pray against fire and mo­tor accidents.

■ The ruling APC should be care­ful so that the race for 2019 Presiden­tial Election will not break it and take Nigeria back to square one.

■ Rasheed Ladoja should pray seri­ously against terminal sickness.

■ Nigerians should commence prayer for IBB against stroke and death.

■ Sunday Oliseh, as revealed to me by God, is not the right coach for the Super Eagles.



http://sunnewsonline.com/new/prophetic-bombshell-biafra-70-accomplished-prophet-olagunju/

lordcornel:
@GarShehu (Garba Shehu)

https://www.naij.com/677174-president-buhari-loves-christians-read-amazing-christmas-message-nigerians.html