₦airaland Forum

Abosi31:

Source:
http://www.escapedmydiary..de/2015/03/the-beef-with-nigerian-pastors.html?m=1

Before I begin, I would want to state categorically, that I am not an atheist, I was born into a Christian home, and till now I still believe the world didn’t come about by some silly Big Bang Theory.

Over the weekend I attended two churches; the one a friend dragged me to on Saturday evening, and then on Sunday evening, Assemblies of God Church, my family church. I noticed some things which I didn’t like, and I’m sure the other worshippers did not like them too, but they had become used to them over time.

This is the blog, well, so I’ll just bare my mind here. The reason why it’s ‘Nigerian’ pastors on the title up ahead is because yours faithfully has never attended church service outside the country. So I’m quite assuming only Nigerian pastors do the following.


#1. Screaming into Microphones:

Oga, there’s a reason why the thing is called a microphone. It is to be talked into, or even whispered into (if your voice as loud as mine). There’s no need to shout into the mike. It pains the ears of the worshippers close to the speakers. And then, we all end up leaving church with our ears ringing. The worst part is when you people now scream in tongues during general prayers, unto God- with mike! Shey God will not hear you if you don’t use the mike? Haba!


#2. Breaking Bottles on our Heads:

Have you ever sat in a church and the pastor, during his sermon speaks grammar that makes you lose anointing? Jeez, me too! A pastor will go like: “Go to the extreme end, and call that sister. That demon has to be pursued out now-now!” The demon in the instance will even begin to laugh seriously. One thing that pains me is that these pastors have no regard most times for us, they don’t mind breaking our heads with those unscrupulous grammar and pronunciations,  because they're operating from cloud nine. Make una calm down, thank you.


#3. Staying on one Prayer Point for too long:

I personally detest this. Some pastors will make a simple prayer like, ‘God bless my family’ and turn it into a marathon race. They will stay on one topic for hours, and ginger and ginger us not to stop. It gets boring oh, Pastor. We are Nigerians and we get bored easily.


#4. Asking for too much:

I don’t mean financially this time. Some pastors are like some of our presidential candidates. They are born dictators and control freaks, and only hide behind the pulpit to force us to do things. I personally don’t like when a pastor says: “Walk to fifty-five people and welcome them to service this morning.” It causes problems for ushers as the church becomes rowdy. Also, some pastors like their congregation to repeat every sentence they say fourteen times, or obey every single order to the smallest detail. How will a pastor tell us: “Lift up your right hand and place it on your left breast, then put your left hand under your right shoulder. The anointing is about to flow.”? (Okay I'm exaggerating again), but how on earth are we supposed to pull that off?

#5. Ending every Sermon with Seed-Sowing:

Aha. I put this one last because it's the one you've been expecting to see. These days, even a sermon on how saints will be ruptured on the last day ends with certain pastors making alter calls for people interested in sowing seeds. This is after the church has collected like three times offering already oh. You should stop this oh. Sometimes we your congregation get milked in service to the extent that we also use our transport money to sow a seed. We really humans oh.


If my dear Nigerian pastors can resolve all these, then maybe my beef with them will reduce small. Abi no be so?



Meanwhile welcome to March guys! March on!

culled from :
http://www.escapedmydiary..de/2015/03/the-beef-with-nigerian-pastors.html?m=1

YU ARE ON YOUR OWN OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

Rhebekah:
A wife suspected the husband of having sex with their maid, then she sets a trap for the husband by sending the maid to the village for the week end without telling the husband.

At night, the husband told his usual story "darling i want to go and watch wrestling in the sitting room" he left. The wife silently went to the maid's room lying down on d bed naked without any light, he open the door and join her on the bed without wasting time amd without a word, he had sex with her. After the fifth round she said, it's enough, i have caught u, so this is how u use to have sex with her, u will do two round and u will tell me u are tired; fifth round now and u are still demanding for more...

The gateman replied"AM SORI MADAM I DIDNT KNW U WERE the ONE" EWEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!! She shouted,

then The husband rushed in and caught them.

if you are the man or woman, what will u do?...Dnt spoil d fun,spread it 2 ur friend n get a funny answer.

I KNOW YOU ARE LIEING BUT JUST CONTINUE

ajixkhid1:
No pictures why should i bliv dz ... abeq who knws hw much z fufu igbo

NO PROOF

supremus:
Dividend of Sha.ria

WOW 7 VIRGINS WAITING FOR HER

OK NOW.

gists:
AIT should just apologise and do as Tinubu says.
Tinubu is not like Buhari. He will not agree to out-of-court settlement like Buhari (against Abati & The Guardian Newspaper)
I don't remember Tinubu losing any court case. N20B will cripple AIT - especially if APC wins.
A word is enough for the wise.

SUPER STORY FROM UR MIND

123gist:
Naija scofield no map out him plan wella

BADEST BOY EVER LIVETH.


RIP TO THEM O

OK

CALLN 07038641600 SERIOUSLY

GEJ TILL 2014

THAT WAS THEN

CONGRATS

TRASH

HOW FAR NOW.KEREWA HON

WOW

HAPPY BIRTHDAY SIR

Na pride now. they believe they no fit sick.But not all of them sha..na only some ooooo

wow. duping a BIG CHURCH LIKE THAT u must be a chief Ursher or Good Member

eewooooo

wow

see me in my office ASAP

ok

CONGRAT OOOOOOOOO. NA REAL INVESTMENT

trash.possesed with some kind Spir

wow

ok ooooo

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If you want your Android device to perform at optimum level, you better think twice about installing some of the most popular apps available.

Social media apps, followed by games and shopping apps, apparently take their toll on mobile devices, putting strain on not only battery but also speed, storage consumption, and data traffic, according to security firm AVG Technologies. AVG has based its findings on data aggregated from its own app currently installed on over 1 million Android devices.

The app measures how installed apps affect performance, and then AVG presents the findings every quarter. It just released a full performance report, for instance, which singles out Facebook as being the worst app overall. The social network always runs in the background, monitoring activity on the network and sending notifications, etc.

Facebook isn't the only popular app to make the "overall" list. Spotify's music-streaming app directly impacts storage capacity and data consumption, earning it the second spot. Check out the top 10 list below.
Overall performance impact

Facebook
Spotify Music
Instagram
Path
Amazon Android
Samsung WatchOn
BBM
Line
8 Ball Pool
Daily Mail Online

AVG pointed out that Netflix is no longer in the top 10 overall list, thanks to a November update that lessened battery drain. In addition, Amazon's main shopping app likely earned a spot in the top for overall device performance drain because the app saw an increase in use over the quarter as consumers shopped for Christmas.

It's worth noting that in a separate list detailing which games negatively affected a smartphone or tablet's free storage space, AVG named Boom Beach and Deer Hunter 2014 as the top offenders.
Don't use optimum-performance apps

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Very unfortunate. Election will come and gone . RIP to them

BABA 70 Himself

ok now