₦airaland Forum

Patrick Obahiagbon, who represents Oredo Federal Constituency of Edo state shot to limelight the moment he arrived the House of Representatives in 2007 with his uncanny knack for jaw-breaking words.

For reasons he explained exclusively below to Saturday Vanguard in his first ever interview on his manner of speech, the 1983 product of St John Bosco Grammar School, Obiaja, Edo State swore that he has since cut short on the big, big vocabulary he uses.

In this chat, the 1987 Law graduate of University of Benin, who also holds two Master degrees, appealed to his audience for understanding, explaining that, “the intention is not to deliberately befuddle or obfuscate them” insisting that, “ I do not set out to deposit my audience in a portmanteau of indecipherability” Excerpts.

Why I speak the way I do

Sincerely speaking, I want to tender an unreserved apologia to my colleagues and all those who feel that my language is obscurantist. The truth is that I do not set out deliberately to mystify my audience, to deposit my audience in a portmanteau of indecipherability or in portmanteau of conundrum. No, no, no, no! Far from it.

The cosmic force would not allow me to do that. But, you see if you ask homo sapients who have interfaced with me for close to twenty years now, they would tell you that I no longer speak high sounding language. I have reduced it radically.

If you have the opportunity to listen to my speeches or debates ten, fifteen years ago, then it would have been a different kettle of fish all together. So, I am convinced that I’ve tried, I am trying and I will continue to try to ensure that my language, or my idiolect is as limpid and as diaphanous as possible.

But, let me say that I am an omnivorous reader and I put my nose on the grinding stone to read for more than 7 hours a day when most innocent men are sleeping, and night marauders are doing their business. I am on my table, in my Library for 7 hours. And that has been on for over twenty years. And like I always tell people, the dictionary for me is not a reference point; the dictionary is a vade mecum, a constant companion.

I spend on the average not less than an hour a day referencing the dictionary for the past twenty to twenty-five years. So don’t be maniacally bewildered if I speak most times, from what I draw while reading. But, really, the intention is not to deliberately befuddle or obfuscate my presentations on the floor.

My Political experience
I was a student Union activist all my years in the University of Benin. Little wonder, as soon as I left the University and finished my Youth Service, I dabbled into the aqua of political arena. If I remember vividly, I contested my first election into Oredu Local Government Area (LGA) as a Councillor only one year after my Youth Service.

So I have been in State and National politics effectively from 1999. But it has not been a bed of roses, giving the miasma, given that convoluted phantasmagoria, given the prependalism and all the intrigues in Nigerian politics.

I contested several elections and lost several elections. Some not because I lost, but because of course, we are in Nigeria, and the X factor in Nigerian politics is still very important.

But, I knew right back from when I started, that I had a date with history, with destiny. At every time I lost an election, I would decide to be more recusant rather than being recumbent. I decided to be more quixotic rather than being laisser-faire- to challenge my destiny the more rather than relapsing into a cocoon of levity, or into a cocoon of political narcissisms. And I thank the great galaxy of the universe, after several attempts at political office in 1999, my bread was buttered.

The cosmic afforded me the lacuna to give a vivacious and vibrant representation to my constituency.

And since then, it has been one political victory to the other as ordained by God.

That was why mandate to remain the amiable representatives of Oredo Federal constituency was challenged very, very viscerally, at the election tribunal, I had no fear that at end of the day it was going to be victory for me. this is because I am a robot in the hand of God.

I believe that the hand of God and the cosmic imprimaturs are in my political odyssey. If it were by my grace or by my powers, by my capacity, I Probably would not have been qualified in the first place to become a councillor in my local govern
http://www.vanguardngr.com/2010/03/06/why-i-speak-big-big-grammar-hon-obahiagbon/

9ice

does anyone know the modus operandi of RCCG and how someone can rise to a Pastoral position? kindly advice

Dear Agatha,

I have a girlfriend who doesn’t trust me on the basis of my past life as a Casanova. She actually met me as one, but I have since changed. She is so jealous that she doesn’t want any woman near me. She lacks respect for me, keeps malice, embarrasses me irrespective of where we are, shouts at me at the top of her voice, denies me food in my own house, listens to gossips, believes anything she hears about me without demanding for explanation from me and sleeps outside my home when she is upset with me.

There is no week we don’t quarrel over one issue or the other. She gets upset unnecessarily. I have taken steps to stop all the other girls who used to come to my house from coming since I met her. I have also taken her to see my parents as the woman I want to settle down with.

I had planned to marry her last Christmas, but told her she has to stop all those upsetting things, yet it appears she can’t. On December 31 and January 1, we again quarrelled. She actually told me, as is her manner that she wasn’t interested in the relationship anymore. Like all those other times, she came back to beg for forgiveness. This is about the fourth time she is doing it.

She keeps doing this because she knows I love her. I have just concluded my National Youth Service Corps (NYSC). I am getting fed up with the whole thing.

Do you think I should continue with her or end the relationship to enable me begin something new with another lady?

Agatha, I love her so much, but it is so painful that she prefers to live with my past when I have done everything since I met her to demonstrate my love and loyalty to her. I want to marry two years from, because I know AIDS is real.

Santox.

cool!

bisi ibidapo obe

A company driver, Amoo Olaide, stunned an Agege Grade ‘A’ Customary Court when he said he wants to dissolve his marriage to his wife, Tope Amoo, because he discovered strange incisions on her private part as he was about to have sex with her.

The 28 year old driver, who lives at No.29, Tunde Davies Street, New Oko Oba also alleged that whenever he has any misunderstanding with his wife, she always threatened to stab him with broken bottle.

He further informed the court that his wife is a thief who steals from him and careless neighbours.

“There was a day I came home with large sum of money from the office but when I woke up the next day to prepare for work, I discovered that N40,000 was missing from the money.

“When I asked my wife about the missing money, all she could say was that she had used the money for something,” he told the court.

Amoo, however, said that he now lives separately from his wife, adding that the union was blessed with two children namely Kanyisola and Aliyat.

He claimed that his wife begged him later and lured him to have sex with her which led to the discovery of the incisions on her private part.

He urged the court to dissolve the marriage and grant him custody of the two children of the union as he doesn’t want the children to live with the wife so that her bad attitude won’t runs off on them.

However, he pledged to pay a monthly allowance of N2,000 to the wife through the court registrar.

The wife, Tope Amoo, was not in court to defend all the allegations levelled against her. The court president, having listened to the plaintiff, adjourned the matter for judgement

http://thepmnews.com/2010/03/03/driver-to-sack-wife-over-incisions-on-private-part

It was a show of shame at the Lagos Television (LTV) premises when a popular female actress, Bukky Black was stripped during a fight between factions of the Association of Nigerian Theatre Practitioners, ANTP.

The actress was stripped during the free for all that ensued between two factional supporters of the association. A member of Alogbon’s faction, Bukky was said to have engaged some female supporters of Alimi in a fisticuff, but was overpowered and stripped in the process.

She was later arrested, along others involved in the show of shame by the police.

P.M.NEWS gathered that it took the intervention of policemen detachment from the Alausa Police Station to quell the fracas.

Chairs and dangerous objects were said to have been used in the fracas that occurred at the LTV premises where a faction of the association was holding a meeting, while the leadership of the factions were taken to Alausa Police Station for a closed door meeting with the Divisional Police Officer (DPO).

Scores of ANTP members were seen outside the Alausa Police Station yesterday evening as they were not allowed into the meeting the DPO was holding with factional leaders.

P.M.NEWS gathered that the Akeem Alimi faction was holding a meeting when the other faction led by Shakiru, popularly known as Alogbon stormed the venue and ordered the meeting to stop, saying that since there was still a court case, there was no way Alimi could parade himself as elected governor of the association.

It was gathered that members of the ANTP held its election on 11 February this year during which, Alimi was elected as the governor for a second term after he allegedly defeated Alogbon in the contest.

During the swearing in of the said governor, it was alleged that Alogbon came to the swearing in ceremony with court papers restraining Alimi from parading himself as governor of the ANTP. Alimi was sworn in despite the court papers.

While Alimi was holding a meeting at the LTV premises yesterday, supporters of Alogbon allegedly stormed the venue, while their leader was said to have stayed outside the premises.

An eye witness and upcoming artiste, Mr. Femi Martins, alleged that the whole crisis started when a member of the ANTP from Mushin, Omo Goriola, vowed that the meeting could not continue since there was a court case.

He was alleged to have fomented trouble before his other colleagues came in and the free for all started.

Another actor, Sunday Ossai was alleged to have vowed that the meeting would not continue until the determination of the case in court.

As the atmosphere became tense, security guards at the LTV intervened and succeeded in sending some of artistes out. But they continued the fight outside the premises before the Alausa Police Station DPO led his men to quell the crisis.

A comedian, Segun Joseph a.k.a. Segede said the election that brought in Alimi was free and fair, saying that members of the association wanted the whole issue to be resolved amicably.

He said that if another election was held, Alimi would still win since he enjoyed the support of the majority of the members.

According to Oyinlola Omilani, a female actress, the result of the election was clear enough that Alimi won.

Aduroja Olatunji, another actor blamed the elders of the ANTP for the crisis in the association, saying that they knew that crisis was brewing but failed to do something to put the house in order.

http://thepmnews.com/2010/03/03/bukky-black-stripped

Acting President Goodluck Jonathan has struck a deal with ailing President Umaru Yar’Adua’s kitchen cabinet, also known as the cabal, aimed at giving the president some respite in the wake of the widespread clamour for his impeachment.

Aso Rock sources told P.M.NEWS this morning that the meeting between Jonathan and the cabal, which took place early this week, deliberated on a number of issues which bordered on the power equation in the presidency in the present circumstance.

It was gathered that the two parties agreed not to disgrace Yar’Adua out of power by removing him through impeachment.

Also, it was agreed that Yar’Adua should be allowed to recover from his ailment or in the event that something tragic happens, Adamu Aliero, the Federal Capital Territory (FCT) Minister and member of the Yar’Adua kitchen cabinet or any of the president’s in-laws should be appointed the Vice President after Jonathan had become the substantive president.

At the meeting, Jonathan was asked to retain the present cabinet and ensure that Yar’Adua boys remain relevant in the running of the affairs of this country.

It was also agreed that Yar’Adua’s wife, Turai, should stop wielding enormous influence in the Presidency but should rather lie low for now.

Our sources said that another agreement reached at the meeting is that Jonathan should not try anybody who was responsible for the deployment of soldiers to the Nnamdi Azikiwe International Airport, Abuja last week Wednesday when Yar’Adua was brought back from Saudi Arabia. Nigerians have been calling for the sack of the Service Chiefs, especially the Chief of Army Staff, Lt. Gen. Abdulrahman Dambazau for the deployment of troops from 4th Battalion and the Brigade of Guards to the airport and Aso Rock without the knowledge of Jonathan, the Commander-In-Chief of the Armed Forces. Many consider the action as a treasonable offence that should be punished.

Our sources said the agreement was a one-sided affair as all the issues agreed upon were favourable to the Yar’Adua boys who appear well-versed in political gamesmanship.

Jonathan was said to have ended up with the short end of the stick as he took away little or nothing from the bargaining table with the cabal.

With the deal now struck, the cabal is expected to give Jonathan a breathing space to enable him perform his duties as acting president.

The agreement was said to have informed the outcome of the Federal Executive Council, FEC, meeting yesterday where Jonathan asked the cabinet members to sheathe their swords and allow peace to prevail among them.

However, no one is sure of how long the deal will endure as circumstances could lead to the breach of the agreement by either party in the months to come.

Comment
http://thepmnews.com/2010/03/04/jonathan-strikes-deal-with-yaraduas-boys

may God forgive you. What are your reasons for saying this fallacy?

you need deliverance

Pastor Chris Oyakhilome

For the family of Moses Aboyin of 18, Abu King Shuluwa Road, Akpehe, Wurukum in Makurdi, Benue State, the joy of having children that should normally have called for celebration has now turned a thing to ponder upon.

Mr. and Mrs. Moses Aboyin with their triplets
This is not because they had deformed babies but because God decided to bless them with more children than they ever bargained for. They were blessed with three additional babies in one fell swoop.


The Opi-Nsukka -born couple who got married about seven years ago with two children to show as the fruits of the union according to Moses agreed to add one more baby to the number. Moses and his wife can ill-afford a decent meal per day due to their meager income not to talk of sending their children to a good school.

However, a few months after Eugenia, Moses’ wife got pregnant, a scan result showed that she was carrying twins instead of one baby in her womb:

“We were asked to go for scan test and the result revealed that my wife was going to have twins. Even though we did not bargain for that, we were still happy about the result. But we were surprised on the day of delivery to see that my wife had triplets.”

Moses who was a trader until a few years ago when his business nose-dived is presently a commercial motor rider (Okada rider) while his wife, a petty trader can barely support the now large family. Narrating his ordeal to Daily Sun in his scantily furnished two-room apartment, the father of five said the only reason he did not run away at the news of the birth of the triplets is his resolve to stand by his wife through thick and thin:

“Why will I run away and leave my wife? I know that God who gave us the children would provide what we will use to take care of them.

I have been given a quit notice by my landlord because I could not pay my rent for over one year now. I only begged him to give me some more time since my wife was pregnant and we have nowhere to go and he agreed.”

To this end, he appealed to the both the Federal and state governments and all well-meaning individuals to come to their aid so that they can give the triplets the desired parental care.
 
For the family of Moses Aboyin of 18, Abu King Shuluwa Road, Akpehe, Wurukum in Makurdi, Benue State, the joy of having children that should normally have called for celebration has now turned a thing to ponder upon.

Mr. and Mrs. Moses Aboyin with their triplets
This is not because they had deformed babies but because God decided to bless them with more children than they ever bargained for. They were blessed with three additional babies in one fell swoop.


The Opi-Nsukka -born couple who got married about seven years ago with two children to show as the fruits of the union according to Moses agreed to add one more baby to the number. Moses and his wife can ill-afford a decent meal per day due to their meager income not to talk of sending their children to a good school.


However, a few months after Eugenia, Moses’ wife got pregnant, a scan result showed that she was carrying twins instead of one baby in her womb:

“We were asked to go for scan test and the result revealed that my wife was going to have twins. Even though we did not bargain for that, we were still happy about the result. But we were surprised on the day of delivery to see that my wife had triplets.”


Moses who was a trader until a few years ago when his business nose-dived is presently a commercial motor rider (Okada rider) while his wife, a petty trader can barely support the now large family. Narrating his ordeal to Daily Sun in his scantily furnished two-room apartment, the father of five said the only reason he did not run away at the news of the birth of the triplets is his resolve to stand by his wife through thick and thin:

“Why will I run away and leave my wife? I know that God who gave us the children would provide what we will use to take care of them.


I have been given a quit notice by my landlord because I could not pay my rent for over one year now. I only begged him to give me some more time since my wife was pregnant and we have nowhere to go and he agreed.”

To this end, he appealed to the both the Federal and state governments and all well-meaning individuals to come to their aid so that they can give the triplets the desired parental care.

kindly accept my condolences

i had a dream - i was in a pet shop lookin for pet food, funny enough i don't have a pet though i like dogs. Suddenly, a man walked to me, shook my hands and started chatting with me, and guess who it was? Sir Alex Ferguson, the Manchester United manager - i was shocked though i tried not to show it. I am a football fan but the funny thing is that i don't support his club. He was wearing a black leather jacket. He thanked me profusely for showing an interest in pets saying he loves it and i should continue. Then he spoke briefly about dogs and we exchange pleasantries and parted ways - i don't understand the dream - can anybody help me out?

well, if he is not married, there is nothing wrong in it