₦airaland Forum

aisha2: Women sha, I cant even imagine reporting to my husband that someone refuses to greet me. Each to their own sha. Shey without that persons greeting your oxygen will stop abi?

aisha you neva see be dat'o!

Trust me this is a BIG issue to a lot of women especially if they don't like you. They will be like 'you are living in my house, i an feeding you bla bla.. but your mouth is to heavy to great me' before you know, she will start looking for other things to incite the husband against the guy.

There re women who always show themselves, trying to prove they are in charge

cococandy: When you wake up in the morning.

Tell him 'good morning sir'
In the afternoon 'afternoon sir'
Same in the evening.

Just do it for one day and his brain will reset.

lmao!

will never forget. My dad used this tactics on me very well while still a kid. Sometimes i wake and unconsciously do not greet him, he calls me first; shizzle, good morning sir! it will now dawn on me that i haven't greeted my old man dis morning'o, and i will promptly do the needy

I will allow my wife limited access to my money

I will definitely have sex (lots of it) with my wife before i marry her

KingAdeOluomo1: Omo alata indeed .
Big time olosho

I dey gbadun that girl die, fvckery is a major consideration to her in everything....

Sophyrocks: I also have the fear of been stuck to the wrong person. Mehn, thats sickening. Gosh, its a life sentence. To death maybe! Thats why im trying soooo hard as not to allow that happen. I can't sentence myself to that kind of life. I am enjoying my singlehood and my marriage must not be the opposite. The rest of my years before i leave this earth must not be spent miserably. Never!! God will help us all. Marriage no be beans.

In marriage you cannot have someone who is completely wrong or right in the real context as there can be no perfection in humans.

I think we should all ask God for a spouse who isn't perfect but whose imperfections we can bear and cope with as thou the imperfections weren't there in the first place, bearing in mind that just as we are coping with someone's imperfections, someone is also coping with ours. The acceptance of this fact will go a long way.

Note: i am not saying that principles, standards and whatever you stand for should be compromised by all means.

ojeffo: ...IDENTIFY LOCATION FOR POSSIBLE SWOOP ON THE TARGET

lol...She's in the best position to provide you the info you need...baddt guy

babamadiba: dat few steps taking fit reduce libido in some cases o. Chop it as e dey hot, I think dats beta

reduce libido ke??

Na im be say konji neva hungry u. No be person dey travel 17hrs go find puccy to f ck?

beeevan: Why will I call my husband daddy when I have one? That sounds nasty on a young man, more suitable for Bianca and Ojukwu kinda setting.

Abeg don't go there.

Ok, if we are follow your logic, then one would also ask 'why will i call my husband baby when i have kids' innit?.
You ought to realise that just like 'baby', 'honey', 'sweetie', etc etc daddy/mummy is also a pet name. I have seen even singles call their partners daddy and or mummy/mama.

Its a matter of choice as long as it suits the caller and callee....lol

Ok on a serious note, it doesn't matter what you call your spouse, this really should not be an issue as long as both persons concerned are comfortable with what the other calls him/her and neither of them complains.

I have personally seen man who calls wife mummy and she calls him daddy, and they both cool with it, so kini big deal?

Op spare us that biblical verse pls, it doesn't hold water, Don't even go there

OmoAlata1: I will call him Daddy in the bedroom. oh Yes daddy give it to me hard

this babe i dey gbadun your style, I like the way you speak your raunchy mind, akpako tinz, you got a mention here too >>
https://www.nairaland.com/1830105/should-married-couples-separate-rooms/1

ojeffo: NOW I DO STRONGLY BELIEVE THAT U BE CONFIRMED GUY MAN...Y U DEY FORM TO BE TOTO NAA WEN U BE ORIGINAL DICKIE

guy don't go there! she be correct toto'o. Her yansh get 2 holes and she get two oranges for chest

Having a separate does not necessary mean you wont share the same bed at night, cos from the comments so far, its obvious that some people think separate rooms simply means, 'sleep in your room and let me sleep in mine'.

I do know that most women love to have their space due to their excess luggage and baggage, so I'm even surprised to hear any woman say she wouldn't like to have a room to herself, and then most of we men cant just contend with their plenty baggage and scattering of their Cameronian and Cambodian hair here and there. Especially when you have a disorganised woman as wife, gosh it could be so annoying

Separate room to my knowledge means, have your own space, wardrobe, make-up table, tv gadget to avoid friction etc but once its time you relocate to his room for fluid donation . Secondly you don't always have to play the match in his room, he can be the one to move over to your room for akpako tinz, i personally like the idea of different locations in my house playing host to love sessions to me and my wife at different times starting, from my bedroom, to hers, the children's room, the visitors room to the sitting room, and then the bathroom.

The only places i will spare in my sex-capade is the balcony and the kitchen. The balcony is kinda public and the kitchen...lest one of us stumbles on a kitchen knife in the heat of the fun

egopersonified: Moral of story, dont allow yr husband build his house, just squeeze yr family in a 2 bedroom apartment.

Abi'o!

OmoAlata1: separate room what if you woke up at 2am ho.rny? it really defeats the purpose of being married. I like 2am sexx, when you are half asleep, half awake. you always get the orgasm

Is his room in maiduguri while your is at ogbomoso? 2am or 1pm, how many steps will you require to walk to his room when you are horn.y? Oh well, whatever rocks your boat hon.

lmao @gifs

'Never use sex as a weapon or punishment'.. very correct!

it happens, most times in your subconsciousness you start singing same song as the person

Scenario 1: You can barely find such now, with girl child education, women liberation and empowerment, all those have changed now. Gone are those days you know.

Scenario 2: an improved and modernised version of scenario 1

Scenario 3: (the lighter note)
It will only take a highly irresponsible and foolish man to behave in such manner, a man who has little or no respect for his wife and children, driven by lust for some daughters of eve who if care is not taken may eventually ruin his home, fleece him and dump him.

And finally, you said 'God can never be wrong'...making the man head of the home. This has been mis-interpreted in many ways albeit deliberately by some for some reason.

You ended well by admonishing and i quote for emphasis:

Lets stop destroying homes by promoting articles and threads that divide the family and destroy the society, if we respect our wives, and treat them as Queens, they will make us the Kings we truly are. However the fact remains that: the man is the HEAD OF THE HOME.

That is the main essence of this thread and hopefully will not be lost on us.

joomiegirl: Many thanks sir...

Although the thinking of the women who support the OP may not neccessarily have anything to do with the state of the homes they came from, good or otherwise...

Na the feminism movement cause all this casala.
I'm an advocate of equality in the workplace: equal work, equal pay, no gender discrimination with respect to promotions, merit, and all that. Those are some of their ideals.

They just don't know that they should draw the line at equality in marriage...totally different playground, totally different institution. Different ball game!

And many don't really care to know the real meaning of submission in marriage...they often mistake it as acceptance of physical abuse and battery. Nothing could be further from the truth.

I'm aware, the reason for the repetitive use of 'some'/'most' in my comment.

Its a shame. God bless you.

Thanks too!

The world would have been a better and happier place without this senseless and evil religion. bunch of brainwashed bar.stards

Pi.sss and sh1t be upon pauper mohammed (shi.tty accursed winch) SAW

senseless and evil religion

Pi.sss and sh1t be upon mohammed

Bar.stard sons and daughter of the religion of pi.sss.

I habe been saying it, its all a grand plot from those satan from the upper north, a bomb blast is always averted or defused when a mosque/imam/Buhari is the target, but if its a church, it never misses its target. Bunch of cursed bar.stards deceiving themselves.

To hell, all ye children of the satanic religion, religious of peace my dustbin, bar.stards!

bloodykiller: your mama na harlot and you are a product of unkept pusssy that's why you talk rubbish.

vulture like you.

otu nne gi ebea

bastard son of a rabid dog

useless morron

may bomb scatter your miserable family for politicizing peoples death.

may thunder wipe your family.
your father nyach

AMEN!!!!

joomiegirl: I don't understand this OP at all.
He clearly thought he would be given a thunderous ovation from the women and I'm happy to see; that didn't happen!

I am female, and I will try to set him straight..hopefully.

IT IS THIS KIND OF HARE-BRAINED THINKING THAT IS THE ROOT CAUSE OF DYSFUNCTIONALITY IN THE WORLD TODAY!!
Hian!
The man is the head...GET OVER IT!!
Being the head has nothing to do with domestic abuse(that's another kettle of fish altogether)...its simply the way God wired it, for marriage to work as it was originally designed to.

Even with this partnership theory, the woman should realise that there is a senior partner and junior partner.

To wit: He should include her in decision-making, ask for her ideas and views..but ULTIMATELY he takes the decision. She may not like the end decision he's taken, but she's got to be submissive and support him not fight and buck him at every turn...there can be no two captains in one boat.

Even when she knows she's right, a wise and submissive woman would quietly let him do it his way if that's what he wants...trust me, when his fingers get burnt, you may be certain he would not take your counsel so lightly again. That's wisdom. That's submission. That's true followership.

I am a strong independent woman who knows what she wants; and is no-one's fool.
BUT I most certainly do NOT want to be the head of my marriage, when I do get married!
I do not want the responsibility(na yam?), and I most certainly do not want the conflict.
The man is the head AND priest of the house. Which means that I will not follow a man who would leave me alone to tend the family prayer altar...that's HIS job. I'm a helper. Chikena.
Life would be a lot simpler, and society a lot less dysfunctional if everyone stuck to their God-given roles.

Being submissive does not make the woman a footmat, and to the men: knowing your wife should be submissive does not give you the right to treat her as a footmat. The bible asked you to love her, as christ loved you, and asked her to submit. If you love her, and truly show her that love, she even tries to outdo herself in submission, and when she does that, the man loves her even more. Its a lovely circle.

Bottom-line, no woman should marry a man she cannot follow, respect and submit to...what's the point? Its not all about "love wan-tin-tin"
Ladies, If you cannot submit to this person, if you do not TRULY respect him, don't even bother getting into it in the first place...cos all you may end up doing is trying to usurp his authority...and disrupt the order of things.

Its a relief seeing that there are women with functional brains from functional homes, with good sense of objectivity and judgement, and who are rational in reasoning. And you are one of them. You have spoken like a well brought up child who is aware of her environment and appreciates the position of the woman in a home.

You and a hand full of other ladies have chosen not to live in denial of the truth, by accepting the mere fact that the man is the HEAD of the family; and undeniable fact, which can only be contested by 'some' never-to-do-well, deluded, hypocritical and dare-devil women seeking to swindle the minds of innocent younger women in their evil bid to manoeuvre them into making regrettable mistakes in their marital lives and aso to deceive and lure them into thinking that men do not deserve to be respected simply cos 'some' of them suffered from heart breaks and paranoia from their previous relationship(s).

'Most' women who share the shallow opinion of the op are from dysfunctional or broken homes, devoid of fatherly love and care and whose upbringing must have been terrible, frustrating and miserable and as such their line of reasoning is so warped, erratic and delusional to the consternation of every right thinking human.

miss Nigeria is the only one tying wrapper and miss Holland's shoe be like canoe

egopersonified: Op

i concur!

op, are you a man or woman?, you should die first

OUCH!

*goose bumps all over my body*

so touching!

Durchess: Hi everyone, I need help on what to wear to my fiancee's house.Am meeting his parents for d first tym and d parents attend deeper life church, also I ws told his elder brodas wld b around on dt day wit dia kids too... He told me 2 jst luk me i.e I shd wear wateva am comfortable in.
and as 4 me am a jean and top or a simple gown kinda gal so wts do y'all fink.
what wld b more appropriate 2 put on

Why don't you just be you as he suggested?, and you are good to go, you dont wanna try to please every body, do you?

Good luck!

oh well, i have no business here.

GentleMimi: @ beevan and Elantracy,chillx ladies. Some religions actually recommend it. To them it is a norm. So i do not think its wise to insult people for their belief. Lol. See vexing..

@ topic,the man benefits more.
Why? He has freedom to make choices,depending on his financial capability. He gets to have as many kids as he wants,sleeps with different wives legally as many times as he wants...in the past,he gets the advantage of more hands on the farm.
The woman is at a lesser advantage if she is still young. It means early imprisonment,frequent quarrels,husband sharing,lack of privacy.
When the man contracts a disease e.g Ebola,he will share it happily. Lol!
Okay,that was a bad joke....
If the woman is advanced/widowed,then she will benefit more.

Mimi thank you joor! some people giving themselves heart attack for nothing, as if the women were coerced into the marriage, did they refuse going into a polygamous marriage and the man forced them into it? If only some people are knowledgeable enough to know that for 99% of the women who indulge in polygamous marriage, it is the norm, and to them, its simply the right thing to do.

maingwaest: Nice write up OP so she that has an ear .......... Meanwhile nos. 6 de work for me wella .

You are smart, andi believe you are having a happy married life even thou some women interpret smartness as being sturbon and unwittingly difficult

MizMyColi: Hehehe Prisca......I will answer this question when I'm married and about 12 months old init

Nice writ btw.....sounds harsh though, but still a good and timely one

Whats harsh about it View the post with a liberal mind, eliminate all feministic thoughts and idealism, and you will agree you've just been given a textbook recipe for a successful married life.

If you are not a brainwashed feminist, you can implement it in real life with at least 95% success.

Happy future!

baby124: Poverty induced polygamy. If you don't mind sharing husband, at least marry one that is not so impoverished to be fighting over fish. Na wa oooo.

You are missing it! Most times they dont marry out of choice, but out of necessity.