Kobojunkie:
The best is for her to get the mental health help she needs. what you described is the worst for her. Imagine your own child being in a similar situation, would you give the same advice?

My child shall never be as indecisive as that woman. The thing is this.. she knows who among those two men is more responsible but because of her feelings she is blinded. This is where that saying love is blind cones into play. It is not a mental condition.. it is simply the matters of the heart and as we all know women, well 97% of women are more loyal to their emotions.

Even after seeing all the red flags they still stay loyal to their emotions. In this case, there is nothing you can do about it. No matter how hard you advice her or how many times that guy treats her like trash she will keep loving him. I've been in a similar situation like this before so I know what I'm talking about. Well, only difference was that I wasn't married.. in fact I was trying to forget about the guy but it was so difficult.

If she is still pondering over her ex even when she's married it means that she never loved her now husband. She just married him probably because she wanted to answer married woman or because of his money or sth else but definitely not love.

The best thing for her to do is to leave her husband, go back to her ex and then feel the SHEGE.. Nonsense and ingredient.. e be like say suffering no dey tire some people.

GeneralPula:

No

It’s by force..

O brethren, you have to marry a virgin..

Some men say they want a woman who has sexual experience. Some others say they prefer a virgin.

Well, personally I think everyone has their own preferences so this topic really shouldn't be something to debate about. We all have our own reasons but when it comes to marriage virginity is not a key factor that that marriage will last.

It's all about mental maturity, emotional maturity, understanding and respect. These are things you should be more concerned about. Anyways, that's my two cents. Have a nice day y'all!

It's good that you transferred all your money from your account. That's a very smart move. But do ensure that you block your card and I hope this reaches you a lesson.

I support you OP. Peter Obi all the way!

LarochelE:


Anytime I discuss marriage, she keeps saying she is not ready

Guy open your eyes. This girl does not love you yet you keep on spending so much money on both her and her son. And look at the way she was even talking to you. You're just there for the money and btw what does she do for a living?

Can't she cater for her son?

The first mistake you made was taking responsibility for a child that isn't yours without tying the knot with the lady. As long as you guys aren't married then you are not supposed to spend on the kid. Yes you can decide to buy things like toys or snacks for the kid but paying for his school fees is overstepping the line.

Which one be monthly spending per month again

With everything that's going on in this country bikonu! Some people get PhD for wickedness and foolishness.

zed7:
Majority of our girls have bad character. Most men only tolerate them for the sole purpose of sex.

Sex that you can get elsewhere.

Jovialjune1:



I read the body of Op opinion and my previous comment still stands

They buy it because they can afford it, what they have in their account before and after the purchase doesn't affect you and Op's existence, just cos they have nothing after buying it doesn't mean they can't have enough later, or you think rich people don't encounter tough times? Common sense should tell you that for them to be able to afford it means they once had more than enough, so look away from people's way of life if the oppression hurts you and face your existence.

I've been holding myself back not to reply to this stupid comment but I just see the need to address it. I guess you don't know what having a budget is because a reasonable person wouldn't be talking the way you just did.

The OP was clearly asking a question on how people could afford such luxurious gadgets like iPhones while they had little to nothing in their bank accounts. And in your comment you stated that just because they have nothing after buying something doesn't mean that they won't have something later.

Now you are clearly missing the point here. That's not how the world works. Things come up. You don't base everything on luck. The OP wasn't talking about rich people.. he was talking about people with nothing to show for who feed from hand to mouth. Take note!

There's a clear difference between someone that's rich and someone who's source of income doesn't match up with their expenses. If you have more than enough money then yes, nothing is holding you back from buying an iPhone but for the fact that you don't have enough.. you know you don't have enough.. but you still go ahead to buy it is clearly out of question. That is priotizong your needs over your wants.

Why would you buy an iPhone if you know you're going to run short of cash? For what reason? Most times, people that make such decisions do it just to brag and feel among. A person with responsibilities and expenses wouldn't make such a decision. What if after buying the iPhone something urgent comes up and because you don't have enough in your account you start running helter skelter.. running around for money.

I know you're going to get upset and blurt out some unreasonable words because since you entered this thread you haven't said anything reasonable. But all in all, the point I am trying to make is this: Cut your coat according to your size. If you have more than enough money then yes go ahead. But if you don't, just kukuma respect yourself.. and when you've finally made enough, you can buy it.

A word is enough for the wise. Shege full this country I dey tell you. Whatever money you have, hold it tight.

MallamChukwudi:
“Everybody is a genius. But if you judge a fish by its ability to climb a tree, it will live its whole life believing that it is stupid. Einstein

The op has failed by judging the sense of women purely from a logical base. Just as bats can fly at night and see clearly, or sharks can navigate the vast oceans with echolocation, women have areas in which they are superior to men, and I will list them below.

Men may be more logical than women, but it doesn't mean women are not logical, smart, or cannot be smarter than a man. I will put it this way. The dumbest gender in this world is men, and the smartest are also men.

Women are detailed oriented. Your average woman sees and knows more colors than your average man. Also why women occupy departments that deal with managing and recruiting people. I can see it with my mum, for example, she notices things in my body that I didn't even notice myself. The minor mark on my skin, the discoloration of my shirt, and my mood, even if I try to act cool. My dad and brothers don't notice shit, but my mum does.

Also, women are far more intuitive than men. In fact, men are not intuitive at all. For example, a girl can like a man and he will never know, but if a boy likes a girl, I swear she knows. Even if you didn't ask her out, she knows you like her and that he is probably shy because he thinks she would reject him.

Women also know those that hate you. Lots of times, it was a girl that pointed out that this friend is envious of me, or doesn't wish me well. It is like she can smell it with just a few interactions. Just watching my interactions with a hater, she figured it out that bro, be careful with that friend. And it came to pass, she was not wrong. Men are too logical, and that is our biggest undoing.

Women also feel better. For example, women can feel more range of emotions in voices. Words for women are not just to communicate, but a passage of feelings, emotions, and a range of communications words can't explain.

These skills are all the packages that were embedded in a woman when God created her as a helper. She can't be an effective helper by having the same skills as a man. It will clash. Men like their women soft, feminine, innocent, unbruised, etc, and women like their men strong, masculine, experienced, bruised, etc.

You will make a big mistake if you judge women purely from a logical sense, which is limited to the physical realms. Men control the physical world, and women control the spiritual world. Hence you see more women into superstitious stuff than men. So for a person (man or woman) to be whole, he/she must ally with the opposite gender, to become stronger, reaping the benefits of the opposite that it's not in him/her. Hence, two people marry to become one.

Exactly, that's where most men get it wrong. They go around comparing women to their own gender forgetting that women are different. Everyone has to own unique abilities.

Men and women are here to balance and complement each other, not to compete with each other. This gender war is just like a losing war, you can never win it because we can't survive without each other. Both genders are just like Ying and Yang.

The sooner we get to understand this the better. I want to be able to scroll through social media without seeing anything negative being posted by these so called feminists and redpillers. There is this peace that comes when we accept each other and at the same time work at our flaws.

OLULAW:
OP, to quote you, "Whenever I apply logic to actually understand why they make such opinion, I find out that it's always out of emotion and not logic." This is also true of you because all I can see in your post is generalisation.

The women in my neck of the woods are intelligent, smart, hardworking, caring, innovative, trailblazing and glass-ceiling smashers, traversing offices, floors, and boardrooms previously occupied almost exclusively by men. Maybe, you need to open your eyes or relocate to a better socioeconomic milieu if you're surrounded by cashtrapped women selling their bodies.

Bro you're on point!

@KlausMichaelson I really understand your pain and even as a female at times it pains me to hear the words that come out of the mouth of people my gender. I once read a book some years back titled "The Manipulated Man" and in the book the writer explains that women are emotional beings but can become rational overtime through proper exposure.

When I mean exposure I mean, by getting exposed to what's happening around them: the news, politics, reading books, etc. It also pains me to see the kind of comments that the females in this topic make. None of them can make a valid point which could wow a person.

I can beat my chest and tell you that there is nothing wrong with you. You are just a man who has high standards in what you look for in a woman. You want someone that's logical, someone that you can have mature conversations with and not someone who always nags and tries to drain your wallet with useless things which will soon go out of style. What attracts you to a woman is not her body or her beauty. You are looking for someone with brains.

Such women are hard to find these days. But I can assure you, there are reasonable women out there. I have met only two in my lifetime plus my mother, that's how rare they are.

For now just focus on yourself and being the better version of yourself. I am sure you will find that woman who will sweep you off your feet someday with her intelligence and maturity.