₦airaland Forum

Dis is war!

dhammyg: THANKS

Enjoy.

dhammyg: OP THANKS FOR MAKING ME LAUGH


ABEG NAIRALANDERS TODAY NA MY BIRTHDAY.I WILL REALLY APPRECIATE IF Y'ALL COULD CONGRATULATE ME ON THIS HAPPY DAY

LLNP hip hip hip hurray!

I have no greater joy dan to see my children walk in the truth...

abbakacici: what wrong is with your jonathanians. they were admitted in AUN academy which similar to A levels or foundations UK

dont call me a jonathanian... I don't do politics and am not GEJ fan either.

D power to make money disappear. 20 millon dollars na coins?

brownlord: The scholarship was given by the owner of the school, qualification does not matter here. The girls need to be rewarded for a job well done.

Lol. D owner of d school will still probably give dem job when dey graduate. I guess it will dawn on dem when every job dey want to apply for ask dem for deir SSCE b4 Uni. Certificate.

Av dey passed deir SSCE? What certificate are dey entering with Funny country.

in michael jackson voice....we are the world, we are the children...

numba one is so right. i so much dislike uncleaness. boy or gal, man or woman...body odour is a turn off for me too

i will thank dem for d luv cos i neva doubt dem for a second till d revelation came out.

i will simply bury my head in d sand.

shegsky: okay, Give me just 5days, I will set up a committee to look into it then. Hope that is fair enough .

we av 2days b4 d window is shut. SOS!

shegsky: Nah, we reject it by the power in the blood of Jesus. ANISORIBUKU KE !

help a neighbour in need. dis suffering is just too much.

chelshit pls borrow us costa and take rooney,kagawa, young, valencia,fletcher and jonny evans...

Seun: Can you described exactly what you did for a couple of months before giving up, & who taught you, since your previous dogs needed no training?

sorry for derailing dis thread. pls dere was a thread i created in the sexuality section some years ago...i want to delete it...pls can u help me

padeolu: I had a nightmare last night.. it was so different from my previous ones... Its more of an alien visitation or witch/demon attack...Thank God I overcame the encounter with just minor stings

Last night before I slept, there was no light in my area and I knew the possibility of Phcn restoring power was slim and it was so hot that I had to sleep naked (well, almost naked coz I had my pant on). My room sliding window/louvers were opened, so also is the door to my room and my room's restroom and its small window.

I thought of mosquitoes coming in to make the night a horrible one, but the thought cleared off upon realizing I'd be swimming in my sweat till dawn, and who knows, sleep may not come. I madeup my mind to live with the mosquitoes bites, moreso am used to it. I removed my mosquitoe net coz every little breeze that touches my body counts.

At around 1:20am, I fell asleep, it was a deep sleep, I guess I enjoyed the first part of the sleep before alien came to attack. I had a dream, I saw myself in my restroom masturbating as I used to, with my phone on my hand playing a porn video from **censored** (am sure dem G's know that site). While at it, I heard a knock on my door, I quickly rushed my masttting process to make d deal come out, I was wrong, instead of releasing, my dick cut into my hands.. I was so scared that I woke up in the process. I prayed and slept again.

The second phase is where it all happened, I guess this happened around 3am or so. Am not so sure of the time coz their wasn't light and I hate leaving my bed at midnights. Ok, during the second phase of the sleep, I guess I wasn't deep asleep this time around when I noticed a big hand all over my body, pressing me to bed, I couldn't shout, I was so helpless, words weren't coming out of my mouth, I made several attempts to scream, maybe my parents or siblings would hear... But no, I was voiceless. It was so dark that I couldn't see the face of the alien/witch pressing me to the bed. Then I remembered my pastors preaching (I hardly go to church tho) where he sometimes said "when in the day of adversity and trouble.....*or something like that*. So Psalm 91 came to my mind, I couldn't scream it out, coz I was voiceless, so resited the psalm several times, then I noticed instead of being pressed to the bed, I started noticing some sort of bee or needle-like sting all over my body, it was so painful that I started weeping, still voiceless, but tears were rolling down my face. I was very scared and suddenly I was able to talk, instead of calling for help, I SCREAMED BLOOD OF JESUS. From their I noticed the hands stop pressing me to the bed, and the needle-like object stopped pinching me, even though the pain was much.

So, I swiftly took a land lying next to me on bed just to see the face of the big hand pressing me to the bed. Upon switching the lamp on, I saw nothing, so I turned my body to face the other side of the wall, lo and behold, I saw a shadow running on the wall, I guess it was finding its way out, the shadow has a big head, with a very long hand, but short legs. Upon seeing that, I was so scared, I started shivering, and then covered myself with my duvet. After few minutes, some courage came, I stoodup from my bed, holding the lamp on one hand and my bible on the other hand. But it was too late the demon/alien/witch is gone.

My fellow NL'ers, help me thank the Lord, I overcame the horrific mare. I guess I've learnt my lessons. I took too much hot legend (dark ale) before I went to bed and I forgot to make myself holy by licking anointing oil. Any ways, thank you all for reading. Good morning to you all


PS...No insults

lol. u are such a clown

i guess u were not fast enof

dere is a spirit in dis ebola virus. why should people keep running from quarantine when dey know dey risk spreading this wildfire. i guess dis is a question for d gods.

what a dumb question.

Congratulations! who care anyway?

where is he going to get dat kind of money from? all dis nigerian celebrities and deir fake lives....d Jim Iykes et al.

nice one. a good step in d right direction.

one day, d fowl will come home to roost.

Nicki is d real deal. d old queen is gone, long live d queen!

dis dude is pathetic.

25...fuckin legend!

oshey! let me do dat.

what of religious gatherings?

pls expose dis sick exploiters. i almost fell for deir scam, was lucky someone advised me against it. they got my sweetheart tho.

tell dem jare...but if u ask me, na who i go ask?