ctrume: Hello, i would be interested in pickin up dis ticket for my wife if name change is possible. email me on ctrume@yahoo.com

Hi, I'm sorry I've just checked with the airlines and no changes of name are permited. I honestly didn't know this, neither the fact that the tickets are non-refundable. £2700 wasted. Oh well...

Hi there, we have three Lufthnasa tickets that will go unused this year and as they're not refundable I'd offer them for a very reasonable price. The dates are 17th December 2013 to NGA and 17th January 2014 back to UK.
My husband is flying but the rest of our family can't make it. So we'd just change the passenger names for a fee.

Please message me with your offers, thanks

Some images are posted here: http://www.spoon.bloguje.cz/918252-najdza-fotoblog-cast-prvni.php the text is in czech but you can guess whats on it anyway. Your comments are welcome!

we're back, thanks for all your tips, have seen few of them. There are some videos http://www.youtube.com/profile?user=SpoonHere#grid/uploads%29 and I'll add more pix to my blog later. Our departure clashed with the fuel strike so we had bit of adventure too

Shopping mall SHOPRITE in Enugu (6mnths old)

Can I use my visa debit card - are there cashpoints in Enugu and Lagos?

Also, when we land in Lagos, we have to spend one night there before the connecting flight to Enugu. Do you have any tips for inexpensive but clean and safe accommodation near the airport? I've done my research but many places might not have their websites done and still might be good!

On our return we decided to spend few days in Lagos and we'd like to stay in a nice place. I came across few websites and my fav. is Whispering Palms and Hermitage Garden Resort. Have anyone been/stayed there?

And last thing: Do you have a contact to a taxi driver in Lagos who can take us around and who'd be available between 12-16.1 ?

Many thanks!

Guys keep posting your tips and ideas, we have been there in 2007, we've been to Nike Lake and then some waterfalls in a jungle but thats about it and I'm sure there is more, its just that my hubby's been away for long and he's never been into turistic destinations! Thank you all for your responses and good wishes!

Any crime asking one to beware?

No it's not, but all we can do is be carefull because in my own world "Beware" = "informed" and that is what we are. No need to stir panic around.

Re: "Beware of kidnappers and ritualists." ,  do you suggest that people will kidnap me/us because of our skin colour? Because we are not rich or famous or anything that could give the wrong idea of our family having some money to pay as a ransom. We are not going into dangerous areas (Delta state, near oil companies etc) and although things can happen (my husband was robbed once in a bus) HOW EXACTLY would you BEWARE? I want my childern to see their grandparents and I think we'll be safe.

And "ritualists",  I don't believe in juju or any kind of magic, I believe that we have (more less) our lives in our hands. Last time we have seen this shiran (sorry don't know how to spell it) and I went to observe it from close-up (been warned not to) and guess what? nothing happened! I'm not saying I don't respect your culture but come on! Some old superstitions are silly!

Although we're not tourists, we're going to visit family, I'd like to ask for any tips to a interesting places (nature reservations, wonders, architecture, zoo, anything!) We'll be near Enugu (in Udi) and we do have a car. We can even go somewhere and stay over night, we're famlily of 4 with 2small kids. Any ideas appreciated! Many Thanks

can u guys give me some ideas/examples/facts? I'm talking of Nigeria, Enugu, to be particular. Many thanks

Guys, it might have been here B4 but can you sum up your experiences/tips for cheap (possibly) and safe (more important) way how to send goods to Nigeria from UK? I have small parcel on mind and then see how it goes. I know it depends on size/weight etc but I'd appreciate references/contacts.
Cheers! 

2poster: I have read the whole tread and I'm not getting you at all. First you want to divorce him (thats the name of the whole topic) then you say you love him to death and you just want to 'learn' how to be 'more suitable' for him. At the same time you keep complaining about petty things. I know where your insecurities come from, I've been there myself, but you have to put yourself together and make up your mind, based on fact, not imaginations and frustrations and then act on it. Please don't paint his picture of useless, possibly used, probably understated and misunderstood white wife of black (nigerian) husband. Its not fair.
I wish you the best luck x

Its true that it depends on who is raising up the child and how, however the environment does play huge role also!
You might try your best to be a good parent, be example of good behaviour, but then the kid goes to school, see other mates (how they disrespect their teachers) and plays outside of school with them too and wants’ to be ‘cool’ and ‘in’ and not laughed at.
Here in Uk is huge criminality between teenagers, almost every week kid is being stabbed by other kids (London).
Most families I know is planning to send their kids to NIG when they reach 15 or so, for couple years, to get the sense of schooling/environment back home. That should give them nice lesson!
I’d miss my boy dearly but I do want him to experience his own country in his childhood. The he can go to UNI in Europe, if he’s up for it.

I remember when I first came to England and met first black girl (my school mate at English class) I was amazed how proud, strong, independent she was. In my 20ies, I was still naïve, shy and introvert person. She was outspoken, laud, happy but sort of scary. Then I become close with our old Irish teacher and I remember what she told me on her account. ‘Black girls HAVE to be strong, there is loads of men in their life but not the ‘staying’ types so most of them will have to make the living, raise their children etc on their own’.
There is loads of articles in UK magazines/newspapers about broken families, absent fathers, teenage criminality, teenage pregnancies. It’s a tough world one one has to be tough to survive I guess. Or lucky.

My life is different, coming from white middle class working family, I feel privileged because I had everything I always needed. I am independed, since my 17 on my own, working, studying, travelling. Never had to depend on men to provide for me. I hate arguments, I do not fight with no reason. When I fight I fight properly! But I’m not afraid to show weakness. I’d never try to change my men, but to always support him and stand by him. I’m not demanding but providing. I believe in equality, we do share our properties, incomes, housework, feelings, everything. I’m always honest and open. I do not play games. I am good in organising, getting things done and I’m forward thinking. I respect myself and others (until they give me enough reasons for loosing that respect for them). I’m no angel and my husband has to be patient with my temper sometimes but I’m no witch either! ,)

IMHO the situation depends on many factors.
E.g. is the family around to help or are parents with kid(s) on their own in foreign country? (our case)
Do both of them work full time (not because of fancy careers but because they have to) (our case)
The childcare available – what quality is there, references, is the baby settled & happy etc.
I don’t have any house help but my kid stays with childminder (& other kids) and when he reaches 2.5/3 he will go to the nursery from where he’ll continue to the primary school.
I agree with Ebonyj & ajiri avae – with consideration and given that all sides are happy the child does benefit from environment of professional care by playing, teaching and interacting with other kids.
I’m trying to give him the best I can, he’s got all my time @ mornings, evenings & weekends.
My mum did the same when she had us, we attended nursery and I don’t think it was a bad thing for us.
Respect to all mums, working or not working!

2Tara>> With all your work commitment, long hours, taking care of your son, house and looking after husband you had time to go to gym every week! Well that’s what I call determination! ;-)
Don’t take me wrong, I wasn’t making stereotypes, I was telling you real life stories. Besides that, loads of african man actually DO LIKE chubby woman rather then slim/skinny (not that it would be your case!) I didn’t mean to offend you girl! I’m sure you’re young & pretty. All the best!

hiya, my husbands sister has got school in Enugu, kids from nursery to secondary class, around 200of them, she started with few kids in living room, god bless her. Only determination and sense of purpose can keep this wonderful dream on. Mind you, few years on and it’s still far from profitable (but fulfilling I guess!) Can post some pictures if interested. Good luck!

Sibli: those items you've listed are banned from import? (the link doesnt work)
where else to look for rules/laws?
Does one need to be registered importer/exporter or can he just go ahead and buy/sell as he please?
I heard that no one in Nigeria pays taxes, is that true?

Tara (and others)
I've read the story through and all the comments. IMHO this has nothing to do with race/culture or anything else! The personality, character and brains is what counts.
You might be blind in love, but you should have red control light blinking in your mind when he refused to take you to parties/events/meet friends etc.
You’ve been 7years together and he only NOW got his 5years visa? That sounds strange too.
I know many Nigerians who married (usually older, fat and lonely) woman for papers but I’m not feeling sorry for them anymore (I used to). One has to use his senses and try to look through things.
I did follow my heart but was cautious at the same time.
Now, I cannot imagine my in-laws (my Nigerian mum & dad) accepting my husband misbehaving, they love me so much! And I know another few of couples with happy ending (so far anyway) so don’t give up on Nigerians as a race but blame him for being bad person and please, please WAKE UP and act as mature person, mother of a child. You need to be strong. Write him off and start all over again, he’s not worth it and you should know much earlier. Don’t you have friends?
If you want, get in touch.
All the best