₦airaland Forum

i am a cronic portsmouth fan

what will they think of the old man when they finnaly arrive?

_{just thinking aloud}

Rich Dad:
Menstruation

said who?

some1 sent this to my box and i kinda like it so i decided to share it. _{[s]if u ve seen it b4 nko wetin come happen. [/s]}


Occasionally we go back down the memory lane and review History but do we rely grasp all that was intended? Could the History below be just coincidence or do we need to learn anything form it?

No history teacher told us the following (I suppose),

Abraham Lincoln was elected to Congress in 1846.
John F. Kennedy was elected to Congress in 1946.

Abraham Lincoln was elected President in 1860.
John F. Kennedy was elected President in 1960.

Both were particularly concerned with civil rights.
Both wives lost a child while living in the Whitehouse.

Both Presidents were shot on a Friday.
Both Presidents were shot in the head.

Now it gets really weird.

Lincoln's secretary was named Kennedy.
Kennedy's Secretary was named Lincoln .

Both were assassinated by Southerners.
Both were succeeded by Southerners named Johnson.
Andrew Johnson, who succeeded Lincoln, was born in 1808
Lyndon Johnson, who succeeded Kennedy, was born in 1908

John Wilkes Booth, who assassinated Lincoln, was born 1839
Lee Harvey Oswald, who assassinated Kennedy, was born 1939
Both assassins were known by their three names.
Both names are composed of fifteen letters.

Now hang on to your seat !
Lincoln was shot at the theater named "Ford."
Kennedy was shot in a car called " Lincoln " made by "Ford."

Booth and Oswald were assassinated before their trials.

And here's the "kicker":

A week before Lincoln was shot; he was in Monroe , Maryland .
A week before Kennedy was shot, he was with Marilyn Monroe.

And Lincoln was shot in a theater and the assassin ran to a warehouse.
Kennedy was shot from a warehouse and the assassin ran to a theater.

Creepy, huh?

best any day any tym. . . . clint da drunk (i love that guy)

worst Gbenga ade wahtever the first (abi last) he is a noise maker

the NFA are a bunch of fools

thumb up to Kanu

Eagles will play for free - Kanu

Super Eagles captain Nwankwo Kanu has told Kick Off that last weekend's meeting with NFA top guns was unnecessary as the players have resolved to do their best for the country starting from the Nations Cup, whether they are paid or not.

NFA chairman Sani Lulu Abdullahi led a team of top NFA officials to England over the weekend to meet with Kanu and other senior players ahead of next year's African Nations Cup, but the Portsmouth striker told Kick Off exclusively that the FA could have saved themselves the trouble.

"I have spoken to most of the players, and we have all agreed that we are tired of this issue of money money all the time," Kanu stated. "We have decided that if they want they can pay us, if they dont want to pay us its okay, but we will come to the Nations Cup and do our best for the country.

Kanu said the players had already done the same thing on at least three occasions, and would be prepared to do so again.

"We did not get any money when we played against Kenya, the same thing against Lesotho and so instead of complaining all the time, we don't want to talk about money anymore. Our job is to play football, so we want to go to Ghana and do our best to make the country proud.

"Let us not allow money issues to become the headline for us. That is the position we have taken."
source http://www.kickoffnigeria.com/stories/story9145.html

ifeanyi10:
I tend to think before I act. As a result, the things I do will be purposeful and deliberate.
I prefer to wait until I am sure of my ground before acting. This might mean after several visits to a new place, or after a few meetings with a new person, I will feel more open to risk or share trust.
I function best in an environment relatively free of conflict or hostility. When tension mounts, I may become silent; and if tension continues, I may withdraw or avoid the situation altogether.
I do not "act my age." I like to have fun and be silly. However, I am very serious when the situation requires

and u tot and believe this is the right place for u. sorry
I am sure ITUEN, Mignes,Tope T. and the rest have not read this if not u wld ve known that this is not 'an environment relatively free of conflict or hostility"
but all the same i know u are always silly if not u wld ve known this is not a place for u considering the long . . . u just posted

tedy bear,

wetin com cencern u 4 another man matter?

tunene:
one other thing is that English is confused because they borrowed from virtually every language in Europe. you wont the following words are not English origin

they dd nt only borrow from europe, they are doing so from Africa.

the word AGDADA is now in the Oxford Adverced lerners Dictionary latest edition ( and its no joke)

i pray soon we will be seeing words like "abi' "na wa ooo' " no be small thing' "u wan try" "jambite' and so on

guy y must u be kaka. y not something else? for me i'm proudly SURUGEDE

ALL NAIJA banks r bad, Zenith is the only managable 1

PLEASE CAN SOME 1 TELL THESE[b] ALTDON[/b],THAT THIS IS NIGERIA

inxx and sugarlips

i think u r both guilty as charged

not guilty of bad English (even oyibo they make mistakes) but guilty of childish behaviour
Grow up

little boy and a little girl attended the same school and became friends.

Every day they would sit together to eat their lunch. They discovered that they both brought chicken sandwiches every day!

This went on all through the fourth and fifth grades until one day he noticed that her sandwich wasn't a chicken sandwich.


He said, "Hey, how come you're not eating chicken, don't you like it anymore?"

She said "I love it but I have to stop eating it."
"Why?" he asked.

She pointed to her lap and said "Cause I'm starting to grow little feathers down there!"

"Let me see" he said.
"Okay" and she pulled up her skirt.

He looked and said, "That's right you are, better not eat any more chicken,"

He kept eating his chicken sandwiches until one day he brought peanut butter. He said to the little girl, "I have to stop eating chicken

sandwiches, I'm starting to get feathers down there too!"

She asked if she could look, so he pulled down his pants for her.

She said "Oh, my God!!!it's too late for you, you've already got *THE NECK AND EVEN TWO GIZZRADS~

A housewife realising that the housemaid had started behaving funny decided to engage her one morning.

Madam: "Chinyere why u dey behave anyhow these days? abi u dey craze self?
E be like say u no wan know ya mate for this house again o. You carry craze for head? Abi face no dey fear face for ya village?"

Chinyere: "Look at you, which kind wife wey u be? Afterall my food dey sweet pass your own, "

Madam: "Ehn who told you u cook better than i do?"

Chinyere: "Oga now, "

Madam: "Lord have mercy. Papa Nkechi is coming to meet me in this house,  Na war between me and am today. Oooh no wonder,  I dey suspect since, "

Chinyere: "That's not all, I'm even better than u in bed, "

Madam: "Yeepa,  I'm finished. So,  Who told u such thing?"

Chinyere: "The driver."

Madam: "Uhmm Chi baby, Chinyerry Chinlosky, come here ehn,  Good girl.

Abeg no let Oga hear that one. OK, "

Question: can Adultry help my marriage
Answer: yes if u want it to head for the rocks

An elderly woman walked into the Bank of Canada one morning with a purse full of money. She wanted to open a savings account and insisted on talking to the president of the Bank because, she said, she had a lot of money.

After many lengthy discussions (after all, the client is always right) an employee took the elderly woman to the president's office.

The president of the Bank asked her how much she wanted to deposit. She placed her purse on his desk and replied,"$165,000". The president was curious and asked her
how she had been able to save so much money. The elderly woman replied that she made bets.

The president was surprised and asked, "What kind of bets?" The elderly woman replied, "Well, I bet you $25,000 that your testicles are square."

The president started to laugh and told the woman that it was impossible to win a bet like that. The woman never batted an eye. She just looked at the president and said, "Would you like to take my bet?" "Certainly", replied the president. "I bet you $25,000 that my testicles are not square." "Done", the elderly woman answered. "But given the amount of money involved, if you don't mind I would like to
come back at 10 o'clock tomorrow morning with my lawyer as a witness." "No problem", said the president of the Bank confidently.

That night, the president became very nervous about the bet and spent a long time in front of the mirror examining his testicles, turning them this way and that, checking them over again and again until he was positive that no one could consider his testicles as square and reassuring himself that there was no way he could lose the bet.

The next mornin g at exactly 10 o'clock the elderly woman arrived at the president's office with her lawyer and acknowledged the $25,000 bet made the day
before that the president's testicles were square. The president confirmed that the bet was the same as the one made the day before. Then the elderly woman asked him to drop his pants etc. so that she and her lawyer could see clearly.

The president was happy to oblige. The elderly woman came closer so she could see
better and asked the president if she could touch them. "Of course", said the president. "Given the amount of money involved, you should be 100% sure."

The elderly woman did so with a little smile. Suddenly the president noticed that the lawyer was banging his head against the wall. He asked the elderly woman why he was doing that and she replied, "Oh, it's probably because I bet him $100,000 that around 10 o'clock in the morning I would be holding the balls of the President of the Bank of Canada

A Nigerian man decided to go on a safari in one of the games reserves. He took his faithful pet Waffi dog along for company.When they get there the dog starts chasing butterflies and before long he discovers that he is lost. So, wandering about he notices a leopard heading rapidly in his direction with the obvious intention of having lunch.

The dog thinks, "Boy, dis na wahala. "Then he noticed some bones on the ground close by, and immediately settles down to chew on the bones with his back to the
approaching cat. Just as the leopard is about to leap, the dog exclaims loudly, "Man, that leopard sweet o, I wonder where I fit get more around here?"

Hearing this the leopard halts his attack in mid stride, as a look of terror comes over him, and s_link_s away into the trees. "Chei", says the leopard. "That was close. That dog nearly chop me. "Meanwhile, a monkey who had been watching the whole scene from a nearby tree, figures he can put this knowledge to good use
and trade it for protection from the leopard. So, off he goes.

But the dog saw him heading after the leopard with great speed, and figured that something must be up. The monkey soon catches up with the leopard, spills the beans and strikes a deal for himself with the leopard.

The cat is furious at being made a fool of and says, "Here monkey, climb my back make you see wetin I go do that wayo dog. "Now the dog sees the leopard coming with the monkey on his back, and thinks," Wetin man go do now? "But instead of running, the dog sits down with his back to his attackers pretending he hasn't seen them yet.

And just when they get close enough to hear, the dog says, "wey this monkey sef. you no fit ever trust am, 30 mins don pass since I send am make him go bring another leopard and he still never come back!!"

brownsilk:
both of u na surugede

brown milk abi na wetin be u r name, wetin carry my name come here now? how u go join two ppl say them be me? if na joke stop am 000000ooooo0000

can u read this

well, sorry folks , moved it to ,  ,  ,

make una c ituen  ooooo
who is ituen to say that someone else of a double paste is'nt it a case of the kettle calling the pot black?

and who is tope_teadr  to crictize someone else joke? guy i don't think you're qualified to do that, u ve got no comic side in u. i'm not [sup][/sup]sorry to say that

all the same mind the way u suspect him and the way u treat him, because from thte look of things u push him too far. Men do no like when they apoligise for an offence they do not commit,
the cards may falling ur way now but a time will come, when u push him too far for what he dd not do, and his friends may urge him to do it so that when he apoligises he will know he is apoligising for what he dd.
I know u will be saying "i know my man he can not do that' if u know he can not do that then u will have no reason to suspect him the first time. that u suspects him means he might be able to do it, don't push him then into doing it.
dont foget Adam fell, so who is he?