₦airaland Forum

AfonjaStinks:
Hahahahahahahahahahahahaha

What is Headies award ?? An award they give to primary school kids ??

This is the funniest joke I've ever heard in my life

Who do you want to give headies award to ?? Tekno ?? Headies award is meant for non talented noise making kids like Ycee, Lil Kesh, Small Doctor, Mr Eazi, Humble smith, Reekado Banks and Koredo Bello
Aramide ?? Who the fucck is that ??

Tekno has songs more than Reekado, Lil kesh, tiwa savage, Koredo bello and Mr Eazi put together

And all his songs are hits

He performed in over 20 countries this year alone, Olamide sef performed in only 2 countries this year, USA and the U.K
Tekno performed all over Europe including Helsinki

This is the funniest joke I've ever heard in my life

Alleluia was a hit

Holiday was a hit

Duro was a hit

Wash was a hit

Dance was a hit

Where was a hit

Pana was a hit

Tender was a hit

Diana was a hit

Rara was a hit

Can someone mention any artist that has had hit songs back to back ?? All his songs are hits

What an insult ??

*Spits on headies award

Pure sarcasm

AY the richest

Seyi Law has the most endorsements (He might not be the richest tho)

Teju BabyFace has the most watched TV Program

Followed by Tee A

Funke Akindele (Yes, she is comedian too) has the most watched and most loved comedy drama

If you wanna laugh hard, just watch Yoruba movies especially if Sanyeri, Mr Latin, Ijesha, etc are there

Even most of these comedians insert Yoruba into their comedies to make it sweet

If dem born you well, sing for naija without mixing Yoruba and lets see if you will blow

Need I say more

I rep Oduduwa

Now, thats an ASSS

But this one na shiitt and yamayama full inside am

RIP

imurboss:
NO WAY! It's not worth it my dear but i would prefer to know

Let me know after you must have known

imurboss:
olosho? for your info i'm a female

Doesnt stop you from catching heart attack when you catch him cheating

imurboss:
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lol,there's no way i can be diagnosed of heart attack,on top of what....ko jo . Thanks all the same

Except she is your olosho. If na girl wey you love, I am sorry for your heart........And if na olosho why you even won check her whatsapp

imurboss:
......Is that all

Yes...Okay, let me tell you, when it works you pay me later.

Go to www.web.whatsapp.com on your laptop, take her phone and go to menu on her whatsapp, click on "whatsapp web" scan the back code from web.whatsapp.com with her phone, it will connect. Even if she is in Australia and you are in Mars you can read her chats live. It works with only internet. So long her phone has internet and you have internet on your phone, just carry go. I use it personally for my convinience. And it doesnt log out except you log out yourself.

Come back here later to share your story from the hospital bed after the doctor must have diagnosed you of heart attack.

imurboss:
Please how did you hack someone's whatsapp into your laptop i wan learn work

Pay 5k.

Oklander:
What if you turn off your computer, would it reconnect when you turn it back on and connect to internet?

Yes. Even if thunder strike your laptop, give it back to engineer for repair, connect again and you are back

The other Chelsea players aside Moses will have to type "Davido" on google to know about him

hustla:
How do you do that?

Go to www.web.whatsapp.com on your laptop, take her phone and go to menu on her whatsapp, click on "whatsapp web" scan the back code from web.whatsapp.com with her phone, it will connect. Even if she is in Australia and you are in Mars you can read her chats live. It works with only internet. So long her phone has internet and you have internet on your phone, just carry go. I use it personally for my convinience. And it doesnt log out except you log out yourself.

Come back here later to share your story from the hospital bed after the doctor must have diagnosed you of heart attack.

jaymichael:
How do u that? please.

Go to www.web.whatsapp.com on your laptop, take her phone and go to menu on her whatsapp, click on "whatsapp web" scan the back code from web.whatsapp.com with her phone, it will connect. Even if she is in Australia and you are in Mars you can read her chats live. It works with only internet. So long her phone has internet and you have internet on your phone, just carry go. I use it personally for my convinience. And it doesnt log out except you log out yourself.

Come back here later to share your story from the hospital bed after the doctor must have diagnosed you of heart attack.

jaymichael:
I thought whatsapp web logs out when the phone disconnects. What browser works best with it ?

Nope. Once the phone connects, it connects you back. Chrome is best. Must be the latest version

Pylony:
Most it be on Laptops, can't i use my Android to do that?

Nope. Computer only

7Alexander:
Bro, can one use a mobile phone instead of a laptop? Because I opened web.WhatsApp.com on my phone and I didn't see any code. Please reply

Nope, only computer

Girlbestfriend:
OmO guy that your last statement no jel at all, Gosh!!!!!!!! can't stop laughing

Na true I talk o bros. The guy go hear am..

niyi123:
Please how is it done.

I Will really appreciate your prompt response

Go to www.web.whatsapp.com on your laptop, take her phone and go to menu on her whatsapp, click on "whatsapp web" scan the back code from web.whatsapp.com with her phone, it will connect. Even if she is in Australia and you are in Mars you can read her chats live. It works with only internet. So long her phone has internet and you have internet on your phone, just carry go. I use it personally for my convinience. And it doesnt log out except you log out yourself.

Come back here later to share your story from the hospital bed after the doctor must have diagnosed you of heart attack.

stalinho:
I tried it once.. and trusted her more..
.. when you meet your real babe.. you will know .. you will have no option than to repent and give her a good reason to trust you too..

My case exactly. I hacked her whatsapp onto my laptop and I couldnt believe how faithful my bae is. We are still waxing stronger

More pics...

Everyone on the site called the reptile alligator. It didnt take me much time to convince them it's name is Monitor Lizard since they see me as some 'informed guy'

I am a plumber. I have a job going on a construction site in Ajah where I am posting this from at the moment. My workers and I got to the site this morning to start working, one of the labourers who I asked to bring a sewage pipe screamed out like Sango's thunder, I rushed to see what happened, and it was a snake crawling out from one of the 4 inches pipes seen in the picture below. I immediately grabbed a big stone and hurled it at the serpent's head, before I could bend down to pick more stones, other workers on the site have scattered its head in a split second.

Just 5 minutes later I heard the same guy shouting 'obe' 'obe' (Obe is SOUP in Yoruba). I went to see what was happening again and he had killed a monitor Lizard. Everyone wanted us to smoke the rare reptile for some garri consumption later in the afternoon, but right now as I type this a man is negotiating to buy the giant lizard for N2,500. The labourer's daily stipend is N2000. Sellng it for N2,500 wont be bad. But I have told the man to check back in one hour.

But I am thinking, since I am the boss on the site, should I just buy it for like 2k and we all roast it for garri for lunch. What do you think?

Thanks to my Gionee M5 plus for the clear pictures

Patiently waiting here for lalasticlala to nod this to the promise land.

Okay ooo

The only reasonable thing I have heard or seen him do. Nigerian firms, especially the multi national ones dont like being treated with gentility, they will take you for granted. So, I will thump him for this

Still doesn't make me like him tho.

Seems the ewa aganyi he dished for himself the other day is doing wonders in brain

There is no gainsaying the fact that the Nigerian economy is in a complete comatose, the prices of goods, especially the consumables are hitting the roofs, the country’s currency is nose diving to its lowest ebb in history, couple with the Niger Delta menace of incessant bombing and witting destruction of pipelines and oil plants. The Nigerian state is grappling with too much at the moment and the side effect is falling on the citizenry. I am a pro Buhari, I was one of the change chanters during the elections, and I supported him with all my breath because I thought he was incorruptible. I believe in his method and idiosyncrasies of governance, but it seems to me that the change we cried for is rather becoming a malediction rather than blessing, at least, at the moment. I have seen and experienced so many ups and downs in my life but this latest set of circumstances really beat them up hands down.

Should I just believe what an elderly man told me recently? He put it like this, “Change is coming to Nigeria, but we must be patient. We will first experience the worst before the best can show up. The current economic situation of the country is a price we must all pay to get to the promise land. The suffering will pass and blessings will illuminate afterwards”

We must also agree that the present admiration met a shambled economy. Oil which is our major, if not the only income generating commodity has lost more than 75% percent of its value. The past administration milked us dry, looted us to the bones, and left us with an empty treasury. But in all that, I am just like every other Nigerian-always looking for whom to blame for our woes. If Buhari will take all the praises for fighting corruption, he should equally be blamed when the economy is going down to the core of the earth. And while I blame the president and his rigid approach to governance, I still stand by him 100% to take us to our Canaan land and restore the country’s lost glory. I still see him becoming a martyr and the Lee Kwan Yun of Africa.

In the meantime, I will just pick my wrench and get back to my plumbing work.

Blame Nairaland, Seun and Lalasticlala, they wont stop propagating the menace of snake killing. Meanwhile, your madam na the snake wey you kill, you have killed half of her life...

What did I just type up there? Total balderdash

Off to my plumbing work...Hey, you, where is my wrench?

My signature, my business, my life.....

Good Morning everyone

Good evening everyone

Does anyone else notice there is no tomatoes in any of those pictures? Use tomoato draw for this kind timee?

Meanwhile, I am done with site work today....hey, you, where is my wrench?

Good evening

preggi:
Hello The Plumbers,

Pls could help with what it will cost to do the Plumbing of a four bedroom flat with all the rooms having their own bath & toilet?

Thank you

There are so may things to consider before coming up with a quote: The size of the toilets, will the toilets and kitchen have hot water?, Are you considering a shower tray or bathtub or just shower poles? Is it the quotation for just the running and conduit of pressure pipes and sewer pipes or you want the quote to include the fittings of accessories like the shower, wc, kitchen sink etc?

It will be better if you can also provide the plan of the said apartment, it will help in determining the size and what and what can go into each toilet.

Good afternoon