₦airaland Forum

crossbreedwears:
7M is enough for him to relocate to Canada but it doesn't have to be through school

kokakola:
From your post and chat, I deduced the following:

1. You love her more than she loves you and she knows that. She's not into you but you're forcing things.

2. From her litttle responses, she's trying to manipulate you with Emotion making you feel you were wrong and she was right.

3. You have trust issues, you don't have evidences and you're acting weak.

4. You are giving her excess control over you by being emotional here instead of being logical and smarter.
Women act smart but you should be smarter as a man to have good relationships with women now and in the future.

5. She's very much comfortable and relaxed while you are acting defensive. Something that is supposed to be the other way round. This is a bad move by a man.

Relationship is work but for your sanity and peace of mind, take time to understand yourself first before trying to understand how the female gender operates. Based on her response, she behaves like someone who has nothing to lose if the relationship ends.

Have a healthy control in your relationship as the male, your leadership and control should be with positive results generally. Women respect men who can lead them rightly in every aspect without being egotistically bossy.

To lead effortlessly and exercise control over a woman, you need to understand male and female psychology and this is easy if you've females around you why growing up but unfortunately, some men don't take time to understand why men and women do things differently in the same and opposing situations.

Donwilson88:
Is the US court where we will find justice?!

Is there no room for justice in Nigeria?!

addmole:
I and My wife have been married for 5 years. We are based here in Lagos. She's 35 years old. We are doing very okay and living comfortably. Since we got married, my wife hated sex so much. I am not even trying to sugarcoat this. She doesn't want to hear you talk about it or she does it. There's no one in the family that haven't tried to settle our differences since we got married. She was never like this when we were dating. It's been 1 issue to the other. She doesn't initiate sex, and when she does accept you to have sex, it's missionary style and it's just 1 round. Ah, me wey dey like knack wella. This woman begin change am for me. Lol. She doesn't want to hear you discuss sex.

Anyway sha, lets move on...

5 YEARS ago, her mum came to my house to kneel down and tell me I am stressing her daughter that I should not kill her with sex. Her then-unmarried sister then asked if I ama dog? Ah, insult. Anyway, I don forgive her. I spoke to my wife and told her what is the meaning of this? What kind of lies are you feeding your family with? This is the same person who happens to make just 1 round of sex. Just 1 round. She lies flat on her back. Once you are done, she quickly pushes you away if you stay on top of her for more than 10 to 15 minutes. There were times she would hit me if I try to initiate sex. I reported to her elder brother. He elder brother warned her. She stopped. She moved to kicking me anytime we initiate sex on bed, i reported to my pastor, he spoke to her and then, she stopped. My pastor told me i have to be patient with her. I said OK.

Omo...
The only time we make love is just 1 round, missionary style and that's it. She says she has pain on her stomach. I have been patient for 5 years with her. I told her anytime she's strong enough, we can make out. That there's no problem.

I have been pressured to cheat on her many times. i HAVE BEEN REALLY PRESSURED. Its just not easy. Her family have insulted me for demanding sex from her. Lol. The thing tire me. I see no where i am demanding. We don't do any other position apart from the missionary style. We do not even kiss. This is a woman that doesn't want you to kiss in in anyway. Even sometimes, she shouts at you when you try to be romantic to kiss her unexpectedly just to spies up our love life. She doesn't even want you to cuddle her on bed. She wants to be alone. Make money, attend to her business, vibes, laugh with friends and family and that's it. When it comes to sex, don't go there discussing that with her about making out.

I even had to retort to preparing her mind for sex by sending her a position we would try on WhatsApp, she would leave the message on read and not respond. When you talk to her about what you sent to her, she would just tell you, she's not strong to make love.

ANOTHER PART OF HER:
My wife is a very bitter person full of anger. If you try to tickle her when she's cooking in the kitchen to play with her, she gets angry and warns you not to try such. My wife doesn't want you to play with her. I am not writing all these to make it look I am a victim here. But all these are my experiences. I have to pour it out. I NEED SOME ADVICE.

There were many times, we agreed on separating. But we have already children and we used to think about these because the quarrels and the disrespect, sex and everything is causing a whole lot on us.

We do not have any form of healthy discussion very well. Before you know it, we are quarrelling over the place, she's shouting. There was a time we quarrelled that after throwing a Gotv remote at her, she fainted. She woke up before we got to the hospital. She almost died. I told her, she needs to stop her anger and control herself and enjoy her marriage. She just won't listen. She's an Edo woman.

I have tried many times to leave the marriage because it's affecting my mental health. Sometimes I regret about getting married to her. Sometimes, I just feel, maybe I CAN TRY MORE and give her a chance. When you call her to discuss our sex life, about her anger and bitterness, she doesn't apologise. She hardly apologise. Even when I get to explain her part on why she was wrong, she claims she's right until maybe someone hears us arguing before she would reluctantly apologise.

I have been battling a really starved sex life, full of a woman with bitterness, anger and pride who never apologise. She's quick to advice other women on Facebook, She would video call friends, give them advice and her family how they need to maintain peace with their relationship. But she never seem to give me respect in anyway in her own own. Hmmmm.

Recently, my wife brought out another timetable that she cannot cope making out with me the way she does. Which is 3 times a week. That she can only be available to make love 2 times a week. This 2 times is just 1 round each. This is how she wants it. I immediately responded to her that I feel her pain. I understand. She cannot be pressured just to make it look like she wants to please me that I would rather get a side chic. Yes, i know this was wrong to tell her, but i am frustrated. She disrespects me and starve me of sex and she's even bending the rules again. She responded that 'ok that I am free to do what i LIKE'.

i decided to bring this here to know the comments from people. I would like to get advice from persons who are going through similar things like this and advice me on what to do.

Some of you might say, call her and talk to her. I have done that several times since in the last 5years. I did it last night and twice today. I have spoken to her. She promised she would change, she would not only repeat the same thing but make things worst the next time.

She disrespects me a lot. I have sometimes left the house but come back after families get to call me. She would change for a week and return to her old self.

What do I DO? Please make your responses constructive enough.

Judolisco:
dem dey naija, cotonou and Ghana they call it hustle kingdom.... Na naija boys dey run am... They call it hustle kingdom

UncannyGenius:
She isn't sexy. She is just dry like White women.

Threebear:
I still dey look Kim Oprah this morning and I know see the fine people said she fine.


Venita is the most beautiful woman in that house and it's not even a close contest.


I won't even put Kim at second ....Omo !!


People can hype nonsense

Kingosytex:
I pray he is found safe and sound. The police should start their investigation from the family; the person that sold him out is likely very close to him.
Na rat wey dey house de tell the one wey dey bush day fish dey for house.

ToyinDipo:
Riggie determines who goes home, not you.
Stop waisting your time voting.

Englishisamust:
Becareful bro, why are you eyeing my future wife. Don't let us start war for here!!!

Gucciboy:
Why do I feel Lauren James should have played in the starting XI !

sod09:
One goal lead is no lead
Anything can happen

sod09:
Have you seen them play anything today?
They are trying to use counter attack against this fast and furious Spain
That paralluelo have been chewing her opponent since the start of the match it's no surprise the goal came from her wing

Bunkbars:
2 last this year, and 1 this year.

Honestly, I barely believe these stories you guys complain About here. But I was shocked. How she told me, we can't be in a relationship anymore. Just before I didn't give her the 15k she requested for.

First of all, she started with a phone. I dudged it, and told her I don't have. Secondly clothes, and money for hair, I gave her the money for hair only.

The one that got be offended was then the 15k. I scolded her. And earned her never to beg me for money like she can't get these things by her self from her monthly Pay.

We were meant to go on a dinner date, and I asked her if she was coming. She was coming. She said yes.

I was to pick her, with an uber. She said no problem. I should be going. She will be there soon.

I got there, sent her a message. I was already there waiting.

This girl, sent me a long note. How she won't be coming any longer. And no longer interested in the relationship. I read the message and kept shut. I didn't even bother my self. Since this was something she could have simply told me and we could talk about it

About 4 months later, this girl sent me a message, about how she was sorry over the manner she broke up with me.

And that I should please forgive her,and accept her back if possible. I didn't even respond to her.

It was later on I heard the real gist from a friend that knows a friend to the guy she dumped me for.

The guy really did my ex, dirty. The dude promised this girl marriage, and later dumped her. .

This life sha, truely, all that glitters isn't gold.