₦airaland Forum

Girls Desk

Dual Core:
nice

Thanks my guy

Someone in the IT industry gave birth to twins.

Guess what they named them?

More

More Extremes

There can be an extreme for anything

Guys, if at first you don't succeed, do it the way your wife told you!


Have a wonderful Woman's Day !!!

GO AHEAD, SEND THIS TO A WOMAN WHO NEEDS A GOOD LAUGH
AND TO ANY MAN WHO CAN HANDLE IT!

Three men were hiking through a forest,



,

when they came upon a large raging, violent river.



Needing to get to the other side, the first man prayed:



' God, please give me the strength to cross the river.

Poof!!!

God gave him big arms and strong legs,



and he was able to swim across in about 2 hours,
having almost drowned twice.
After witnessing that, the second man prayed:



'God, please give me strength and the tools to cross the river'
Poof!!!
God gave him a rowboat and strong arms and strong legs,



,

and he was able to row across
in about an hour
after almost capsizing once
Seeing what happened to the first two men,
the third man prayed:



'God, please give me the strength, the tools and the intelligence to cross the river'

Poof!!!

HE WAS TURNED INTO A WOMAN!!!

She checked the map, hiked one hundred yards upstream,



,
and walked across the bridge

Guys, if at first you don't succeed, do it the way your wife told you!

Seeing what happened to the first two men,
the third man prayed:



'God, please give me the strength, the tools and the intelligence to cross the river'

After witnessing that, the second man prayed:


'God, please give me strength and the tools to cross the river'
Poof!!!
God gave him a rowboat and strong arms and strong legs,

,

and he was able to row across
in about an hour
after almost capsizing once

Poof!!!

God gave him big arms and strong legs,

and he was able to swim across in about 2 hours,
having almost drowned twice.

Needing to get to the other side, the first man prayed:



' God, please give me the strength to cross the river.

Three men were hiking through a forest,

,

when they came upon a large raging, violent river.

More

More

Just Check This Out!!!

Not Red :

Black :

Test 2: You must be able to recite/sing at least 10 of the under listed by heart.



1.Some have food but cannot eat,
Some can eat but have no food,

We have food and we can eat.

Glory be to thee o Lord.

Amen.



2.The day is bright
It’s bright and fair

Oh happy day

The day of joy

The day is bright

It’s bright and fair

Oh happy day of joy

[MAMA JOLLOF RICE]



3.Oooh my home
[Oh my home]

Oooh my home

When shall I see my home?

When shall I see my native land?

I will never forget my home.

[O MY O MY O MY HOME].



4.Holiday is coming [2x]
No more warning bells

No more teachers’ cane

Goodbye teachers,

Goodbye scholars

I am going to spend

A jolly ho-li-day [2x]



5.H-I-P
For the HIP

[FOR THE HIPOPO]

P-O-P-O

For the HI-PO-PO

And

T-A-M-U-S

For the HI-PO-PO-TA-MUS

HIPOPOTAMUS!!!

[This was my favourite]



6.Parents, listen to your children
We are the leaders of tomorrow

Try and pay our school fees

And give us good education



7.I am a little sailor boy
That comes from the sea

That comes from the sea to marry you

Oh will u marry marry marry

Will you marry me?



8.8 o'clock is the time for school,
Don’t be late in the morning.

8 o'clock is for boys and girls,

Come to school in the morning.



9.Now the day is over,
Night is drawing nigh,

Shadows of the evening,

Still across the skies.

Glory to the father,

Glory to the son,

And to thee blessed spirit,

Whilst all ages run.

Amen.

[The classic closing time hymn]



10.Rain rain go away
Come again another day

Little Johnny wants to play.



11.Bojuboju o
OOH

Oloro mbo

OOH

E sa para mo o

OOH

She kin shi?

SHIIII

Shi shi shi shii

Eni toloro ba mu , a paaa je

Oju n ta mi o!!!!

[and before you ask, YES, I attended Ilupeju Primary School II, infact I still have my Yoruba Alawiye textbook]



12.Jack and Jill went up to the hill,
To fetch a pail of water.

Jack fell down and broke his leg,

And Jill came tumbling after.

[God knows what they did up there,

But Jill came with a daughter].




13.Sanda LILILY Sanda Lily,
Sanda LILILY Sanda Lily,

Sanda LILILY Sanda Lily,

Sanda LILILY, Ask a question,

[And so on……, trying hard to remember the rest]



14.My Mother,
Who sat and watched my infant head,

When sleeping on my cradle bed,

and tears of sweet affection shed,

My Mother

When pain and sickness makes me cry,

You gazed upon my heavy eye.

And pray to God that I shouldn’t die,

My Mother.



15.Prayer is the key [2x]
Prayer is the master key

Jesus started with prayer

And ended with prayer

Prayer is the master key,

ACTION [then we start demonstrating without singing]



16.Row Row
Row your Boat

Gently down the stream

Merrily merrily merrily merrily

Life is but a dream.



17.Old Rodger is dead and gone to his grave,
HMM, HAA, gone to his grave

He planted an apple tree over his head,

HMM, HAA, over his head

The apple grew ripe and was ready to drop,

HMM, HAA, ready to drop

There came an old woman to pick them all up,

HMM, HAA, pick them all up

Old Rodger got up and gave her a knock,

HMM, HAA, gave her a knock

[Can’t remember the rest]



18.Some rivers in Africa are,
Some rivers in Africa aaa-are

Nile, Niger , Benue , Congo

Orange, Limpopo

ZABENZI.


In theory, there is no difference between theory and practice. However, in practice, there is a big difference.

Test 1: If you did not use this exercise book then your primary school education is suspect

When you have used her die

Manchester City FC opened up a three-point cushion in fourth place in the Premier League after a surprise 4-2 victory against nine-man Chelsea FC at Stamford Bridge.

Carlos Tevéz and Craig Bellamy both scored twice as Manchester City FC ended nine-man Chelsea FC's 37-match unbeaten run at Stamford Bridge with a 4-2 victory which lifted them up to fourth in the Premier League.

Such a turn of events seemed unlikely when the leaders went in front three minutes before the break through Frank Lampard. City, who had failed to score on their last seven visits to Chelsea, equalised moments later, however. A mis-directed header from John Mikel Obi set Tevéz racing away and the Argentinian, twisting away from John Terry and Ricardo Carvalho, stabbed a tame shot towards goal which Henrique Hilário could only help into the net.

Bellamy (52) put City ahead with an angled shot after breaking down the left, before Tevéz (76) claimed his second, from the penalty spot, following Juliano Belletti's foul on Gareth Barry. The Brazilian was shown a red card and was soon followed into the dressing room by Michael Ballack, who received a second booking for fouling Tevéz. Bellamy (87) tapped in at the far post from Shaun Wright-Phillips' low cross, while Lampard's 90th-minute spot-kick was merely a consolation.

Elsewhere, Birmingham City FC defeated lowly Wigan Athletic FC at home, James McFadden (45) scoring the only goal from the penalty spot, while Bolton Wanderers FC moved up four places into 15th thanks to a 1-0 defeat of relegation rivals Wolverhampton Wanderers FC. Bottom club Portsmouth FC, meanwhile, enjoyed only their fourth league win of the campaign, triumphing 2-1 at fellow strugglers Burnley FC. Stoke City FC host Arsenal FC in the late game.

This TV reporter really know how to increase her show popularity,

And she sure know how to look provocative,

Their guests must feel really confused when they saw her.

Scroll Down For The Tragedy,

This is 4 u all

A friend put this picture in his facebook page of a recent armed robbery incident along Benin-Ore express way involving a bus with this comment "Man's inhumanity to man. A bus was ambushed by armed robbers, the passengers were robbed and raped, those that had nothing to give were asked to lie down on the road face down and the driver on gun point was commanded by the robbers to drive the bus over them!!!!"

Can anybody tell me what will make human beings do this kind of thing to fellow human beings? My heart is bleeding in sorrow. It is horrible! Oh my God, have mercy for the blood of the innocent shed!!!

May that is the Nigeria wife, you are on your own

Yes i will do that

Yes he must

Yes i will pay, which i have done that in the past

amuki:
Wales,You too much.That scenerio seems so familiar and vivid.Well painted with cute little kids.Congrats man.You are da bomb!

Thanks man

Your Boss, You And Your Target,