₦airaland Forum

Lol. But this is common if you're marrying from the East, no matter your economic status as a man. My own list was even 4 pages (& this is despite the earlier assurances by finace to 'work on it). I asked for prospective father in law to monetize the list so I can pay, & it came up to N580,000 in summary.

So, you see, if you see a man that marries from the East, don't comapre his expenses with the 'flamboyant' ceremony of the on ethat marries from the West, North or Middle Belt. The bulk of the expenses of the first 'guy' had been spent on bride price.

delishpot:
Men, should know that women we're also not created to share their men. Marrying multiple wives as if women are cattle to be owned. I am not justifying the women who do this shii, as much as I would yell the owner of a precious item to keep it safe so as to avoid someone stealing it or destroying it that is how I will encourage men to keep their homes safe from some cray cray who are out to destroy things.
As you would hate to see your woman banging multiple men in the name of religion or culture, so do women feel when their men bang multiple women In the name of culture or religion.
I just hope he gets his peepee back. Poor child has to pay the price for the stupidity, wickedness and greed of the adults around him.

You've summarised it all. Let's all look beyond the surface or immediate cause. Men, please stick to one wife only. Even if not for God's sake, at least for your own sake. No woman, I repeat, N[b]O WOMAN WILL LOVE YOUR CHILD AS MUCH AS YOU OR YOUR CHILD'S MOTHER WILL. Avoid cases of step-mother ish pls. [/b]

And if you're a young boy, be careful with dating and impregnating a girl becos in the end, both of you will not marry. Who loses, emotionally (to love and play with the child), psychologically (to care and provide for the child's need) and physically (to protect for the child from physical harm)? The love child. Sometimes, such children never, ever really forgive their biological parents! The parents were selfish and only looked after their own interest!

yusaze807:
Actress Mide Martins and Femi Adebayo are pictured on set of an upcoming Yoruba movie, Kokoro.
Fans are saying they are too close for comfort.
Meanwhile; they are both happily[/b] married.

[b]Source: www.9janewsarena.com/2016/06/checkout-photo-of-mide-martins-and-femi.html

If they're both married, this is simply indecent. You can be married, but not everyone is HAPPILY MARRIED, pls. If you're happily to your spouse and truly love him/her, you won't get unnecessarily too close with the opposite sex who isn't your mother or sister.

Forget whatever logic or excuses anyone might propose, we all have blood flowing in us. If you don't flee temptation and pray to God to overcome it, you will fall into temptation. As simple as that, even if you're a pastor!

This is of course, if this is a film scene, where I believe they would have psychologically tuned their mind, emotionally switched off and just do make-believe. Still, carefulness is needed while not being mechanical on scene but real.

Overconfidence is the number 1 enemy of any 'big' team. Before this game, England players were relaxing at the beach and taking a stroll around town. Eh, common, it's just Iceland of less than 400,000 populaion, eh?

Even on skysport this morning, the presenter - was disrespectfully so to Iceland - already talking about and analysign France-Engand Q/F. Lol.

Well, THEY WALKED ON THIN ICE,AND NOW THEY'VE BEEN FROZEN OUT OF EURO BY ICELAND! Lol. This is the real Brexit! They just capped the whole 'Leave Euro' campaign. It seems it was their destiny from the get-go!

Imagine the kind of people that parade themselves as leaders in Nigeria. And to imagine this one is a former governor... How can the country really grow with this kind of people at the helm?

Being typical Nigerians, the voting coordinators could somehow rig this. I just don't know why I sense they're working it out for MIMZY. I just sense THIS CONTEST WILL BE RIGGED FOR MIMZY or LANICKY.

But in all honesty, the prettiest babes, and in fact by far, are REFINER AND IVVY!.

Dear natural beauties, Refiner and Ivvy, if you don't win at the end of the day ('They' know how they will rig it), don't wory. YOU BOTH ARE THE PRETTIEST BY A MILE.

adioolayi:
See why people want you to go for Federal Job...."You will have time for yourself".... "Job Security even when you do virtually nothing".....
We are really in soup...how do we develop as a Nation May God deliver Nigerians from Civil Servants I don't care attitudes to work!

Exactly, sir. Nigerians always thinking narrowly and selfishly, while looking at the larger picture, the country continues to decline. This laidback mentality is responsible for the diffenreces between the methusella-aged goverment corporations and more recently established private entreprises. It shows it all, a quick analysis between NTA & Channels, Radio Nigeria & Inspiration fm, NITEL & Glo, NEXIM Bank or BOI & GTBank, Nigeria Airways & Arik Airline, Nicon & Mansard Insurance, defunct Daily Times & Punch Newspapers....

Is a country's civil service meant as a tool of development or a cog in the wheel? Talk about a child that refuses to grow or a workman (govt) with bad, obsolete, blunted and rusted working tools. Stagnacy! May God help us in this country!

@DaBullIT, so true. I just wish the younger generation can can learn to agree and disagree with decorum. That people belong to diffrent political, religious or ethnic divides should make them bitter enemies. That's why I like Reno Omokris' and Tolu Ogunlesi's brand of politicking, belonging to fiercely oppsoing camps, but hardly hurling insults at each other.

Front page pls lalasticlala. Will be good to hear general views on Nairaland.

Will be glad if this is on frontpage cos it speaks directly to Nairalanders and the average Nigerian today. Thanks.

cc: lalasticlacla

Virtual Nigerians Vs Everyday Nigerians


When I’ve got some free time to spare (particularly on late Sunday afternoons) I mostly tend to loaf around on the web, perhaps I could chance on some new knowledge or simply get myself amused. Learning something new? Yes, maybe one here and another there. Amusement? Ah, aplenty! Especially on the fiercely combative ‘politics department’ of Twitterland Nigeria and the fantastically and anonymously say-it-as-it-is forums like Nairaland. Add also the comments sections of popular Nigerian blogs.

So at such leisure period, my eyes are often glued to my laptop screen and a wide grin criss-crosses my face from the many bluntly honest but crazily funny comments and remarks. Then I think at some point, I grab at my sides as my ribs ache from stifled laughter. Not able to hold it in any longer, I begin to guffaw, my eyes water and a drop or two of sweet tear slid down my face. How embarrassing it usually is when someone burst in and asks who was making me laugh. Lol.

That’s usually a difficult query to answer and it makes me momentarily look stupid. See, it’s simply hard to figure if you just can’t get the virtual commotion out there on the Nigerian side of the world wide web. I mean, my laptop may be the picture-perfect symbol of quiet and order; but it’s a din on the screen’s scrolling pages.

And it’s not a village-market-type hubbub. It’s a war, a virtual war by virtual Nigerians – the youths mostly. As I type, there’s another Twitter war, further amplified on Nairaland, Linda Ikeji blog and the zillion of gossip blogs on the Nigerian cybersphere. Verbal missiles, anti-missiles, and WMDs fly here and there with venomous rage. Insults, tirades and threats are thrown with no restraints. Machetes, cudgels, swords, axes and pixels clink and clash with eerie echo and whips with bladed tongues lash on sweaty backs and bottoms.

Somehow all the ruckus conspires to evoke in my head epic scenes from the Games of Thrones and Vikings film series. The combatants are baying for blood with bulging and feisty eyes, punching fists of fury in the air as huge, reddish veins like tree tendrils lump on their war-sullied hands and faces. My heart beats as they lunge at the enemy with deafening savage roars, suddenly shorn of all fear as if immortals or a care for the sacredness of human blood.

But because it’s a virtual war, no real blood is shed here. But be careful, there are cuts, bruises, lacerations and deep wounds – emotional ones – and yes, if you’ve not got a thick skin you’ll feel the pain. In fact, you may be so virtually battered and damaged by the ‘enemy’s’ strength and arsenal that you may have to fight the temptation to frustratingly exit the relative safety of Twitter war and physically attack your traducer.
(Actually, I’ve read of some political gladiators and warlords on Twitter who agreed to a date and venue to turn their e-fight into a real one and when the day came at a clubhouse, they exchanged more verbal invectives and rained blows on each other. Pheeeww!).

So if you’re fragile, easily broken or offended, stay off or, if you must get a closer view, join the spectator’s group. Ah, these ones are an even funnier lot. “This is gonna be interesting. Let me sip my yoghurt,” one types. “Abeg, pass me the popcorn. Let me spread my mat for this movie,” another one types. “Okada, stop me for this bus stop,” says another cheerleader.

But, hey, let’s hush a moment. Who are these people; these virtual Nigerians? Are they still the same everyday Nigerians I see? Because this latter crop of Nigerians are strangely different in personality by several shades – from my smiley neighbour to the friendly stranger at the bus stops and then my brotherly colleagues in the office.

True, these everyday Nigerians; these ‘other’ Nigerians in the real world have strong opinions too and don’t usually agree about the government and the opposition, the realities of the Nigerian political space, about politicians, politics and elections, about the political parties, the police, the army, the Customs, VIO, Lastma, Boko Haram, Niger Delta Avengers, Fulani herdsmen, Donald Trump, the vain Kardashian clan…

But these opinions are hardly so virulent, so vociferous, so divisive. These everyday Nigerians sooner than later, more or less converge in their views. They are hardly so opinionated and combatant with their sentiments like the ‘virtual’ Nigerians; the ones supposedly in the ‘unreal’ world.
Here’s my conclusion: this comparison is actually a paradox. A mirror, if you like, of our true selves. The everyday Nigerian may bury his or her biases, coloured views and intolerance under that façade of smiles, courtesies and pretences of “We’re actually saying the same things; it’s just the angles that are different.”

But the Nigerians I have tagged ‘virtual’ are the real Nigerians. Safely masked away behind their ridiculously-sounding monikers and anonymous comment IDs; their anger, bigotry, sentiments and mutual distrust are loud in their unheard voices on Twitter, Nairaland and Linda Ikeji Blog (Facebook, not so much).

It is especially so among the younger generation (my generation); stirred and fuelled – deliberately and inadvertently – by the patriarchal political dynasty of this generation.

It’s a huge divide: APC vs PDP, Muslims vs Christians, South-South vs North-East, South-East vs South-West, Igbo vs Yoruba, Hausa vs Ijaw, The Nation Newspaper patronisers vs Vanguard Newspaper patronisers, Premium Times believers vs Sahara Reporters lovers, Saraki sympathisers vs Tinubu disciples, Markarfi supporters vs Sheriff supporters, Federal Government citizen patriots vs secret Niger Delta Avengers admirers, virtual Nigerians vs real Nigerians…

Sadly and unfortunately, most times it doesn’t matter the logic or superiority of the argument of the other party or that triggers the virtual war in the first place, the gladiators always, always align with the already cast-in-stone ethnic or religious sentiments and biases in their minds. Or, at best, they willy-nilly meander and merry-go-round the subject and try to justify their point …but still along their prejudices.

Fact is, the mind of this new generation is continually being poisoned by an unprincipled and classless set of the current political class especially and this is dangerous going forward. I mean, virtual could become reality, couldn’t it?

Or maybe it’s all in my head. After all, the virtual world is not real and all the activities on it may just be a fading mirage.

Hi, I’m Kelvin Keshi and here is where I paint my muse; mostly with parody, sarcasm and good humour.

https://kelvinkeshi..com.ng/

I initailly meant to ignore your obviously meaningless and feeble response (cos, in truth, wat real defence can you put up again the glaring evidences I've exposed?). Sometimes it's wise to ignore, but sometimes it's unwise. Foolish actualy.

The last line of your attempt-to-save-face response shows exactly the warped thought process typical of the everyday Nigerian. People who preach principled public service are condescendingly tagged 'moral,' 'hungry' or 'poor.' The rich and belly-ful Nigerians don't complain and have no worries. What's there to complain about? The status quo is good and must never change (the mentality of civil servant).

Being principled is not about money. That's the difference between a Bill Gates and a Jimoh Ibrahim, you see? And trust me, I am not ranting. Mark my words, all I have said is a prophesy whose time is sooner than you know. God keep us all alive till then.

And by the way, nothing you say will hurt me cos you don't know me, neither do you know the other guy you arrogantly branded 'NL kid.' Did I say typical of everyday Nigerian? Now, you understand it (perhaps yourself) better? Gracias!

amtaken:
NL has really exposed my mind to the frustrations in our land.

So you want the civil servants to be sacked so that you can replace them because they are corrupt and you are so upright?


Hahahahaha honestly I can't say much to you now because you won't be able to sleep at night if I do.


Hehehehehehehehehe shame to poverty oo.

amtaken:
Are you okay? Should the workers wait till she leaves office maybe in 3 years time before protesting?

Why do you people politicise everything?

This is not about Kemi but about the workers' plight.


Haba Nairaland kids!

Am too shocked with dissapointment at people who justify ilegalities, criminality and corruption in small corridors becos they're direct beneficiaries! TAKE IT OR LEAVE IT, madam, NIGERIAN CIVIL SERVANTS ARE VEEERRRY LAZY, VEERRY UNPRODUCTIVE AND VEEERY CORRUPT! From the cleaner to the permanent secretary, you need to hear their conversations, it's always how to corner one money or the other. Even when a minister is a novice, it is civil servants that corrupt them and teach them how to steal.

Sad you're a civil servant, but this is the general perception outside those crooked, do-little-or-nothing-all-day offices called ministries.

They say Nigeria is corrupt, Nigeria is corrupt. But to start the real cleanising, goverment needs to flush out the current civil service - whether wholesale or gradual. They contaminate genuine intention of a new leadership. They don't depend on their salary, but eyeing corrupt gains. You'll be surprised, even a typist will be eyeing one 'N2 millon' cash from budget padding, not to talk of legal officers like amtaken. Go and prove yourself in the private practice, rather than the rosy, corrupt offices of the civil service. A Nigerian civil servant would be using a broken chair and table in a dirty corner in a shared office, but he/she is building a multi-million naira edifice from corrupt gains in Shagamu. It stinks!

If you want to really change Nigeria, start with the civil service. Retire them all and get new guys with private sector mentality and watch things change overnight!

amtaken:
Are you okay? Should the workers wait till she leaves office maybe in 3 years time before protesting?

Why do you people politicise everything?

This is not about Kemi but about the workers' plight.


Haba Nairaland kids!

Am too shocked with dissapointment at people who justify ilegalities, criminality and corruption in small corridors becos they're direct beneficiaries! TAKE IT OR LEAVE IT, madam, NIGERIAN CIVIL SERVANTS ARE VEEERRRY LAZY, VEERRY UNPRODUCTIVE AND VEEERY CORRUPT! From the cleaner to the permanent secretary, you need to hear their conversations, it's always how to corner one money or the other. Even when a minister is a novice, it is civil servants that corrupt them and teach them how to steal.

Sad you're a civil servant, but this is the general perception outside those crooked, do-little-or-nothing-all-day offices called ministries.

They say Nigeria is corrupt, Nigeria is corrupt. But to start the real cleanising, goverment needs to flush out the current civil service - whether wholesale or gradual. They contaminate genuine intention of a new leadership. They don't depend on their salary, but eyeing corrupt gains. You'll be surprised, even a typist will be eyeing one 'N2 millon' cash from budget padding, not to talk of legal officers like amtaken. Go and prove yourself in the private practice, rather than the rosy, corrupt offices of the civil service. A Nigerian civil servant would be broken chair and table ina dirty corner in a shared office, but building a multi-million naira edifice from corrupt gains in Shagamu. It stinks!

If you want to really change Nigeria, start with the civil service. Retire them all and get new guys with private sector mentality and watch things change overnight!

Dear beloved,

You're up against strong spiritual forces that will require a higher level of spiritual armanent to subdue and conquer forever. The battle is not with flesh and blood or cranal (your mum), but spiritual and through the power of our Lord Jesus Christ, they'll be subdued and conquered forever.

So many people are telling you to recite certain prayer points or go to a particular church or man of God. Good. But, brother, you'll have to be INVOLVED. VEEERRRY INVOLVED than usual. You'll have to jetison any surface Christianity mentality and do battle yourself. The man of God can only support you; and you will have to be spotless, obedient to his leading and agonise in prayer and fasting in the sight of God so he can fight your battle for you.

YOU MUST BECOME A BALL OF FIRE, to keep these people away permanently. They toy with people who don't have that armour of God; others to protect themsleves visit harbalists and unknowingly become bewitched, possessed or haunted by them. Some others who are not direct threats to them, they may leave alone (these set usually doubt it when you talk of spirtitual forces and powers or are atheists). Note that the 'threat' in your case might be your mum had prepared someone like her (she had probably done concoctions with) to marry you and your wife became a stumbling block. Top witches always look for heirs to take over their position when they are gone. If her daughters are rejected at the 'council' by their queen mother, they will look the way of daughter-in-laws etc.

Here's the thing: because the judgement of God is slow, the heart of men is set in them to do evil. God doesn't always destroy evil people, including witches, becasue He wants everyone to still repent and their soul saved from eternal damnation. So, you have to move the hand of God by coming into His presence on a mountain in fasting and prayers for certain days. 'Mountain' means seperating yourself a while from all distractions and away from home.

You're lucky the spiritual battle is not from her side, otherwise your marriage also would have be in jeopardy. Just like you did, men are logical and will verify things. But if it were the reverse, the woman, being more emotional beings, will first side with her mum and the older woman will use the opportunity to try to break your marriage. Your get my point?

You need a lot of deep spirituality (be careful of some churches are 'herbalists' in disguise and they are all in cahoot with these tormentors. They'll multiply the problems at the end of the day). You need a lot of prayers. Don't wory, when you get to that point, the Spirit will testify to it and the victory will be yours. When you get to the top of the mountain (figuratively speaking) and at the peak of your spiritual experience, tell God what you want. Move His hand. But, ultimately, He knows what to do about it. He just wants you to ask first. He may do it exactly as you asked, or do it His own way. He knows best.

God be with you. After a long time of agonising and following all the processes above, God is taking charge with me. he's doing it and I'm seeing it. It's gradual but the changes I'm seeing are beautiful in my sight and in the sight of God. Shalom!

Hello Sabuta, I've got something to say, it's kind of deep (at least, I think so). But I have to careful to craft me. I can relate with this 100%, but kind of in reverse. I have gone through a lot, prayed a lot, and had good pastor friends pray along with me. It is well, just follow me on the little I have to say. But please don't take offence in some of the things I will say. Just keep an open mind. The truth is often bitter, but not if you're a good person.

Now to the crux of the issue at hand... Can I go on now....?

Hodgson's selections can be crazy sometimes. He seems to dominate his team with the 'trending' EPL team. At the last world cup, he went 'Liverpool' style. Now, he's doing 'Tottenham' for England, stuffing the team with Alli, Kane, Dier etc even when they're not the best available in their positions. Sturridge and Vardy are the best striking options for them. Kane does not really have a striker's thing, maybe it's the physique or something. Or maybe cos he's not wearing his mask. LOL. And Sterling over Sturridge? Oh, common!

They have the 'material', Hodgson doesn't know how to select them properly...

Op, please give a VERY HONEST ANSWER to this question:

The report says '104 Christians converted to Islam,' right? (Let's forget about the veracity of this laughable report because, like some people have said above, no sane Christian will do that, it's the report I'm more concerned about. Here's the question:

If a report appeared on maybe Daily Trust that reads: '104 muslims convert to Christians in Kano,' wouldn't there be a riot? By the way, this happen regularly and don't need to be reported because true religion is a personal relationship with God and don't need to be broadcast.

Just as the op intended (and I must add flippantly and shortsitedly), everyone seems to be carried away with the pictures of the president's kids. Talk about leaving the grain and munching the chaff.

To the real issue here: What in the name of everything good is this occasion about, other than executive wastage, profligacy and ego-stroking? Please what is 'Matching Words with Action'? What particular, record-breaking action that I didn't take huge notice of? What 'Selected Speeches' please? Of Aisha Buhari or are they talking of Hilary Clinton or Joyce Banda? Which ones in particular 'so great' (perhaps like Martin Luther's speeches) that a book has to be authored and launched with fanfare with the people's money? How frivolous! Aisha seems to be vain and only manages to mask it. Is the president secretly like that too?

“Be ye not unequally yoked together (marriage) with unbelievers (someone who does not believe that Jesus is Lord)” (2 Cor. 6:14).

Some people say love is the most important ingredient in marriage. Important? Yes. But most important? No. What keeps a marriage strong and the couple happy is that they share very similar life philosophies. There's no greater life philosophy that guides your every decision and actions than what you believe. So, except you're just a nominal christian (that is, the word 'christian' it is more of a religious choice o you, than a way of life), you really won't really be considering marriage this minefield.

“Prove all things; hold fast that which is good. Abstain from all appearance of evil.” (1 Thess. 5:22)

“Let us hear the conclusion of the whole matter: Fear God, and keep his commandments: for this is the whole duty of man.” (Eccles. 12:13)