After a long day’s musing on what is not and what ought to be; after wishing some people dead and some undead; after hopelessly hoping….

In this sovereign state, I see people charged with the crime of “Attempting to Bribe a Police Officer.” The plaintiff? The officer himself. I see a country that has completely sifted out law-breaking law-makers and lawless law-enforcers who flagrantly violate the rights of civilians and exculpate themselves with impunity as often as they so wish. Of course, police officers now pay the appropriate fares whenever they utilize the services of commercial vehicles.

This is a country where infirmed leaders eventually die in our local infirmaries. World class medical facilities and services had been earlier brought here by the good leadership of the country. So, they confidently entrust their own lives to the same medical facilities that they have made available to the citizenry; hence, the needlessness of travelling abroad to die. Our hospitals now have the honour of hosting and nursing sick leaders of other countries to full recuperation.

All natural resources are well harnessed and there’s a luxuriant economy with which every citizen of the world wants to be associated. This country is a mecca for tourists from every part of the world; proceeds of which are used to regularly maintain our good infrastructures. “I Spent My Last Holiday in Nigeria” has become a status symbol. We deport Americans and European nationals who try to overstay their welcome here. Whites wished they were Black, Coloured wished they were darker and Blacks wished they were Nigerian. The Nigeria Visa Lottery Programme (NVLP) is anticipated every year by citizens of the world long before applications are due for collection.

Questioning religious stances only elicit elucidations from the religious faithfuls and not decapitation, evisceration or immolation of the questioners as it was wont to be. Everyone respects everyone else’s intrinsic integrity. The seams of ethnicity and religion are blurred by an endemic atmosphere of esprit de corps. In short, we do not entertain fears of literally losing our heads to some fanaticized lunatics for opening our mouths. There are no free savages around here; the incorrigible ones are caged in roomy penitentiaries where they too enjoy their fundamental human rights. The demagogic pulpits are put out of the equation because everyone is enlightened enough to see through their schemes designed to gyp benighted minds.

Here, the citizens do not insufferably excoriate the leadership. Everyone knows that the leadership of the country is an aggregation of respectable individuals whose selfless aims are in the interest of the populace: no one feels he/she is at the mercy of cheats. The leadership upholds their vows to protect lives and property and never denigrate the populace. The electorates decide who rules at every level of government. There are no cases of electoral malpractices: the people’s choices always get to the country’s helm.

Intellectuals are now truly intelligent. Our academic institutions are no more avenues for cretins to inform young intelligent minds to cretinism. There are more tertiary institutions than students, and international students are grateful to get placements in our institutions of higher learning. There are no unnecessary truncations of academic calendars in higher institutions. The academic modules empower students upon graduation to independently engage in research and development. The Students’ Industrial Work Experience Scheme (SIWES), the NYSC scheme and the Graduate Internship scheme are all fused into one year of very profitable cognate experience-garnering. The elites have their children educated in our public schools in their bids to offer them the best of education.

This is the time when Nemesis is a Nigerian. Our judicial structure is faultless and contumacious leaders are subjected to appropriate penal measures in their own constituencies: justice is no longer outsourced. Everyone understands the ubiquity of The Rule of Law and lives in that consciousness. Not even ‘Empty Hen’ or any other seasoned con artist could perpetrate any of their scamming schemes without repercussive government sanctions that always keep the citizens on the winning side.

Now, the cattle-rearers and their cattle-eating counterparts equally accord adorarations to the cow: the cause celebre. Rancor managed, they are now buddies who leave their doors open to one another without reservations. They share the sense of bromance that is characteristic of every part of this country with one another.

Calls to 911 are no more rejoined with the nauseating “Our fire engines have no water,” says the fire fighters or “Our guns have no bullets and,” replied the office of the police “our patrol cars have no wheels.” Everyone discharges their duties to the nation with dedication and selflessness and the confidence of the public is gained.

Suddenly…the screen goes blank; I hear familiar voices, my eyelashes divorce, the screen is pulled up, the stage light is on; I’m in my flat mattress and…nothing has changed. Wow! I have been watching all of these from the inside of my eyelids: dreaming! I have only been seeing these phantasmagorical scenes from a virtual time machine ride. How far forward I travelled I cannot tell, but I know the Time button I pressed is a single digit. I am assured that I will live to feature in this future I just pictured. “Good People, Great Nation!” – This will be our apt slogan. Naija for Life!

I see some of me in you. You are a cerebral writer. Me likey.

Have you tried writing lighter , comic stuff, like sebonzakura kegayosgi (kai, that guy's name ehn! )? Too much of the same stuff can get monotonous, ya dig?

Try a little variation let's see how it goes

Ishilove: Try a little variation let's see how it goes

Thanks, but I don't know if I'll get idle enough to compose anything any time soon. I kinda work round the clock- my job demands that.