Sometimes i am not comfortable when my husband insist on knowing everything I do for my family, I don't brother about his responsibilities towards his own family so I expect same from him. But most times he wants to know
who and how much I give to my own family. Please NLs is this normal?

What's wrong in telling him?


Well you can let him know that he should also tell you how much he spend on his family. Communication is key so work it out.

obowunmi: What's wrong in telling him?


Well you can let him know that he should also tell you how much he spend on his family. Communication is key so work it out.

Thanks for your response .the tone my husband uses when he is asking doesn't encourage me to answer him because I feel he is not happy with it.

Don't assume anything. If he asks tell him. Btw, do you guys have a joint account? Do you pay any household bills?

obowunmi: Don't assume anything. If he asks tell him. Btw, do you guys have a joint account? Do you pay any household bills?

We pay bills but no joint account .my husband is not prudent I save more than he does so for now no joint account

Well seems like its just merely communication issues. Tell him about your expenses before he asks or proactively create a budget and share the information with him. You can also request that he does the same. He seems he only wants to know and not to cause you pain or make you uncomfortable.

Plus if you create a budget, you can hide many expenses. LoooL - don't take his requests too seriously, have fun with it. Don't let it bother you to the extent that you are making it. Goodluck.

If he is not prudent,then he has not earn the right to know.If you start giving him info,he may start thinking you have enof,he will either spend more or push more financial responsibility to you to fulfill his spending habits..this kind of people are hard to live with especially in funny financial situations,they don't know when to stop.

But i feel you guys should discuss money matters,who pays what,i mean come up with a financial plan for everything.communication is the key..but how do u communicate financial matters with someone with a different financial attitude?

He is your husband,so you have no choice but to talk things over with him..and if giving to your parents makes him behave funny,then you have to keep it low or change the way you do it around him.But don't forget your husband and kids are priority #1!

obowunmi: Well seems like its just merely communication issues. Tell him about your expenses before he asks or proactively create a budget and share the information with him. You can also request that he does the same. He seems he only wants to know and not to cause you pain or make you uncomfortable.

Plus if you create a budget, you can hide many expenses. LoooL - don't take his requests too seriously, have fun with it. Don't let it bother you to the extent that you are making it. Goodluck.

Thanks a lot...

9lifes: If he is not prudent,then he has not earn the right to know.If you start giving him info,he may start thinking you have enof,he will either spend more or push more financial responsibility to you to fulfill his spending habits..this kind of people are hard to live with especially in funny financial situations,they don't know when to stop.

But i feel you guys should discuss money matters,who pays what,i mean come up with a financial plan for everything.communication is the key..but how do u communicate financial matters with someone with a different financial attitude?

He is your husband,so you have no choice but to talk things over with him..and if giving to your parents makes him behave funny,then you have to keep it low or change the way you do it around him.But don't forget your husband and kids are priority #1!

Thanks. The truth is he knows my financial status, he knows what I earn so to hide some stuff from him might be a bit difficult but I will sure try that to avoid unnecessary fights. The fact is I don't really do the given all the time but when it is necessary .

As long as you dont leave your husband to take care of ALL the financial responsibilities in the family, you are entitled to give your relatives money when they demand from you. Your husband should even thank God that you are not demanding money from him to give your relatives. My uncle's first child is only fifteen years old but my uncle is already sponsoring two of his wife's relatives in the university. What would your husband have done in this case?

preciousmee: Sometimes i am not comfortable when my husband insist on knowing everything I do for my family, I don't brother about his responsibilities towards his own family so I expect same from him. But most times he wants to know
who and how much I give to my own family. Please NLs is this normal?

I always belive couples should be open to each other towards these things. BUT if your husband nags about every little money you spen on your family, then for your own sanity, keep them to yourself!

preciousmee: Sometimes i am not comfortable when my husband insist on knowing everything I do for my family, I don't brother about his responsibilities towards his own family so I expect same from him. But most times he wants to know
who and how much I give to my own family. Please NLs is this normal?

well if you are in a marriage in community of property it would be important you consult him and tell him when you decide to give your family a huge amount of money. if its little things like money for you little sister to do her hair then its not that important, but money for household expenses it would be best you give him a heads up.

Wetin consain MGBEKE with VICTORIA'S SECRET?

Its not normal at all. Tell him to get a life

See baby,if you tell him all,problems will come. Ask me why?i have the same issue.,If i tell him he will not approve it.And i stopped.I cannot abandon my family because i married him,so what i do now is to give them in secret.My dear do not tell him everything or he will stop you from giving them.And remember they are your parents.

hopefully not.

Op, as long as the money is from your account and u also assist in some household budgets.... Then, no need to tell him how much , u give to yur parents... Or tell him a small figure.. Cause if u tell him the real amount, it will cause problems at home... U have to assist your parents in their old age... It's part of yur duty as their child.