A Wife or the Mother of your Kids, A Husband or the Father of your kids

I was on a journey, sat beside a guy in the bus, and we soon struck up a conversation. First started with Police collecting 20Naira on the road, then proceeded to the woeful state of Nigerian Academic institutions, then to the ups and downs of finding a carrer and lastly on the finding a "good wife" issue.

We discussed a lot, and part/the major of what we discussed was after he put a question to me as a guy, which I answered, and I just felt I should share/put the question to NLs and see what you would say.


It goes like this:
As a man:
The dream of every man is be successful: career and family-wise. For everything to be well-rounded, he'll want to have 2-sides of the same coin:
1)He wants a wife who is loving,caring, humble, respective, virtuous, fun to be with,, etc.who possesses all the qualities he desires in a WIFE.
2) He would love to raise up a family with his wife, and kids(beautiful girl/girls, handsome boy/boys).

As a woman:
The dream of every woman is be successful: career and family-wise. For everything to be well-rounded, she'll want to have 2-sides of the same coin:
1) A good husband who protects her, loves her,cares about her, is humble, respective, virtuous, someone who is all she wanted, etc.
2) He would love to raise up a family with his wife, and kids(beautiful girl/girls, handsome boy/boys).


then he goes: If the "circumstances of life" are to totally prevent a man realizing #1 and #2, where (circumstances of life) could be everything that could hinder #1 and #2 to co-exist together, which would I choose of the two.

I thought within myself for like 3mins, and reply, I would choose #1.
My reasons: As much as #2 would bring its own fulfilment, ive always believed in a happily married man, that I coudn't imagine myself single at 60, that i would want to share my heart and life with someone really special, and that companionship comes before procreation, and that lastly, in todays world, a whole lot of ways are possible to realize #2.

He told me he would choose #2,stating his own reasons: its hard to find a trustworthy woman nowadays as wife, its easy that way for finance management, no need for inlaw palavers, he would still stay hot and available for the "fun-loving girls" etc.

so guys and gals, which would you choose, if you were to make a choice, between #1/#2 and not both.

pls dont divert from the topic. thanks

If the woman of my dreams is incapable of bearing children, that would not hinder the marriage. I guess that means I choose option 1.

This is the 21st century for goodness' sake! You can always get a surrogate mother or sperm donor if your life partner is incapable, or adopt. Everyone should choose option 1.

in any sucessful marriage there must first be option 1 before the proceed to option2. option 1 is the foundation.

in any sucessful marriage there must first be option 1,

good

wheres everyone?

:d

Option 1 is best, but in Africa option 2 is optimal!

I must add that the probability that I'll find a woman to fit option 1 is quite low. In that case I might be stuck with option 2. Yay!

mother of my kids

depends cuz most mother of kids can be
well if i was a man i'll choose carefully so as not to dig ma own livivg grave