What They Don’t Teach At Lagos Business School

Okay so I read an article in the Guardian's weekly magazine "Guardian Life" in 2007 (I think) and I loved it. I remembered parts of it and tonight, I did a Google search for it hoping something would turn up and something did.

Enjoy

Business Tips from the Streets of Lagos, by Tolu Ogunlesi

1. THE LAW OF 5/20/60
Get in Early! Get out even Earlier!
Ikoyi to Victoria Island is a journey of five minutes. In principle. On a weekday morning, it is a twenty-minute journey, if you set off at 6:45 a.m. It is also a one-hour journey – if you set off at 7:10 a.m.

It always happens like this: A visionary entrepreneur brings a new concept to the market (say, ‘Business Lunch Delivery Service’), and immediately start to “smile to the bank” with the proceeds of originality / innovation. Then the “Crowd” – having seen,from a distance, the Promised Land of Potential Profit – rush in. Alas, by this time, it is too late. What they meet is the bust. [It happened with cyber-cafes – if you remember what those are/were].

2. THE LAW OF INVISIBILITY
That you didn’t see it last night doesn’t meanit won’t be there this morning
It is night. You are speeding along Ikorodu Road. You have passed Ikorodu road every single night on your way home from work, for the last five years, so you know all the contours and “gallopings” and mysteries of the road. But tonight’s gonna be a bad bad night. Out of the blues, out of nothing, a concrete divider emerges. In front of you. In the middle of the road. A smashed bumper, smashed headlights, and a crushed radiator follow. You can only curse, and nurse your wounds.
Business in Nigeria is like that. VAT and/or the price of petrol/diesel will double overnight, and double again a few nights later. Government policies (taxes, import duties, rebates, etc) will change faster than you can say “macroeconomic.” A sudden reshuffling of a government cabinet reshuffles will set you back to square one. Multiple taxation will be your portion.
Simply, be prepared – for ANYTHING. Never give in to despair. Never take your eyes off the road. Mitigate uncertainty by the liberal use of your powers of anticipation.

3. THE LAW OF THE LASTMA(N)
Everyman for himself, LASTMA take the last man!
You may not know what the rules are. Or who makes them. Or why. Stop moaning. Accept that the Law around here is often lawless – and greedy.
Let’s use LASTMA as our example. LASTMA sets the rules of engagement for road-users in Lagos. Unfortunately, in many cases only LASTMA seems to know what those rules are.Or the correct corresponding fines.
The business field is often like that; a mined jungle. Prepare for such times when you will break rules that do not exist except in the imaginations of certain (often uniformed/un-informed) persons. What to do? Regularly set aside a percentage of your profits to cover such expenses/extortions/’taxations’ that come with business in Nigeria. Call it The “LastMa(n)” Fund.

4. THE LAW OF THE ‘TRAFFICATOR’
Catch your competitor unawares!
You are on Falomo Bridge, on a Monday morning, approaching Akin Adesola Street. But you are trapped on the lane(s) curving off into Ozumba Mbadiwe. You need to cross(at least) two lanes to get into the Akin Adesola-bound track.

The last thing any ‘proper’ Lagos Driver would do is “trafficate” an intention to change lanes. Lagos being what it is, no one will sit back and watch you displace him/her.The Lagos Driver has therefore come to learn, and master, the art of surreptitious insertion i.e. a sudden yet gentle yet determined swing of bumper, into the spacedesired. Then a pause, to give the ‘chanced’ driver time to realize his helplessness, and then curse.
Lagos Driver then swings the entire car in.

What does this say about business? You alertyour competitor of your plans / strategies at your own risk. Unleash your innovation and hit ‘em hard and square before they can guess what hit ‘em. You are only as good as your ability to surprise competitor and market.

source: http://www.ynaija.com/what-they-dont-teach-at-lagos-business-school/

Nice post, fascinating and educative.. For Lagos wannabes, this is Lagos Partially explained.. Watch out for the next edition by our very own SuperMod Mynd_44( that's if his head will not have been bandaged by certain NLers)... Ciao

I think LBS teaches those principles too, Mynd.

It's all encapsulated in "stay current with the realities of your business environment so that you can harness them properly for your objectives".

Some of the solutions the writer offered may want reviewing though.

However, good one! Thumbs up.

Ihedinobi: I think LBS teaches those principles too, Mynd.

It's all encapsulated in "stay current with the realities of your business environment so that you can harness them properly for your objectives".

Some of the solutions the writer offered may want reviewing though.

However, good one! Thumbs up.

I first came accross it in 2007. So I guess things might have changed but I doubt if it is much

#1 and #2 are ok. #3 reads like we're stuck in a regime of blind corruption. While we still are a long way off from a sane society, we are approaching issues with increasing intelligence and I think that there's reason to say that an intelligent businessman can secure his profits from the canker of corruption if he's willing to make a strong investment and use his head innovatively.

For #4, there are more ways to handle your competition than undercutting them. In fact, sometimes it's a lot smarter and a lot more profitable to do other than undercut them.

true

and what dis

Call now for your mtn magic sim activation it still hot 08024319706......

firstolalekan: and what dis

OLODO LAPATA

While not demeaning the article, I'm surprised that a post by a moderator gets front page status 'sharpily sharpily'

Nice and down to earth, brings the points close to home without being verbose, classic.

Tolu Ogunlesi

yuzedo: [size=14pt]mad, Mad, MAD!!!!!![/size] Exceptional prose!! Witty, yet valid and instructive. The article/writing strikes you as a casual, effortless, piece, yet you'd be forgiven if you mistakenly labelled it a Tour de force! Kudos Tolu; talent recognizes genius!

Exactly what made me still remember parts of it even after 5 years. It is not everyday you come accross something which is so simple and yet relates so well with reality

This is from Lagos Business School,
Aba Business School
and
Onitsha Business School, may have a better tutorial.

Hehehe.

Nice write up.

Now i know why my oga wey dey LBS no sabi anything.

The last thing any ‘proper’ Lagos Driver would do is “trafficate” an intention to change lanes. Lagos being what it is, no one will sit back and watch you displace him/her.The Lagos Driver has therefore come to learn, and master, the art of surreptitious insertion i.e. a sudden yet gentle yet determined swing of bumper, into the space desired. Then a pause, to give the ‘chanced’ driver time to realize his helplessness, and then curse.
Lagos Driver then swings the entire car in.

It sounds easy, but it isnt. I know some drivers( my humble self included) that have this sublime skill.

No 1 - so on point, early birds eat the fattest worms. Very true in most cases.
No 2 and 3 - create appropriate internal insurance policy. Better still, play by the rules, and have all ur dealings properly documented. Keep ur ears to the ground,it will always filter out before it happens.
No 4 - think win/win always, you are better off. Develop the abundant mentality,why fight over the sharing fomular when another cake can be baked? The sky is wide enough for all the birds to fly, think creatively.

This is so on point, good write up! Regards to Tobi

The OP is so on point. That is a summary of Lagos. If you grew up in Lagos you will just unconsciously know these things.

Indeed, an endearing piece...

Nice 1 OP!

I enjoyed this piece, the Parable of Lagos traffic

Everything boils down to a theory in biology ''the law of natural selection'' d strong survive while d weak dies off d rule is dont be weak for a moment or u are down.

@ Ihedinobi,

You're right and I think if the writer passed thru ABP, he's not be using such erroneous caption

1. You don't need to go to LBS to understand simple business concept of understanding the market space and first mover advantage, not to talk of creating the market space

2. Smart companies have always done scenario analysis. Shell and Mobil had forcasted a surge in global crude oil per barel price to a region of $200 15years before it happened. It's in the Havard Business Review Case studies taught in many top Bskuls....our challenge in Nigeria may be that we learn many things way too late. If you consider the economic indicators and the SPEB of business environment, you will be able to predict some trends with some degree of certainty. Dr. Doyin Salami of LBS had predicted the crash of the stock market well long before the crash. He told virtually all his classes before the crash.....the fundamentals were not just right

3. For number 3, it's not new as well. In some of business climes and "gift expecting" cultures, middle east especially, you make provisions for such.

4. Apart from the fact that number 4 is universal, it's also one of the "48 laws of power".

Ihedinobi: I think LBS teaches those principles too, Mynd.

It's all encapsulated in "stay current with the realities of your business environment so that you can harness them properly for your objectives".

Some of the solutions the writer offered may want reviewing though.

However, good one! Thumbs up.

^^ Great post.

Nice post