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Lie Detector et al - Jokes Etc - Nairaland

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Lie Detector Robot. / Lie Detector Robot / Lie Detector Robot (2) (3) (4)

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Lie Detector et al by crisp: 1:27pm On Apr 28, 2008
Someone just sent me this joke. I hope its not been posted before. Enjoy.

[b]One day Kyle's dad brought home a robot. The robot was special in that it could detect a lie and would slap the person who lied on the face.

Kyle returned late from school that day and his dad asked him, 'Son why are you late from school?' Kyle answered, 'Dad, we had extra classes today'. Much to his astonishment the robot jumped up and slapped Kyle on his face.

His dad told him, 'Son this robot is special in that it can detect a lie and will then slap the person who lied. Now come on tell me the truth. Why are you late?' 'Dad, I went to a movie' 'Which movie?' 'The Ten Commandments' Immediately, Kyle got a slap on the face from the robot. 'Sorry Dad, I went to see the movie Sex Queen'.

'Shame on you son, when I was your age I never watched obscene movies or misbehaved' Immediately, the dad gets a tight slap on the face from the robot.

Hearing the last sentence, Kyle's mother comes walking out of the kitchen and sarcastically says to her husband, 'After all he is YOUR son!!!' To which the robot steps up and gives Kyle's mother a resounding slap on her face! [/b]
Re: Lie Detector et al by aristole(m): 1:32pm On Apr 28, 2008
tit joke,
Re: Lie Detector et al by cuteass1(f): 1:41pm On Apr 28, 2008
Buhahahahahahaah . . lying runs in the "family", if they would still remain one after the woman's lie grin grin grin

Her's is definitely the drop that broke the camel's back grin grin
Re: Lie Detector et al by crisp: 2:00pm On Apr 28, 2008
cute-ass:

Buhahahahahahaah . . lying runs in the "family", if they would still remain one after the woman's lie grin grin grin

Seriously doubt it undecided
Re: Lie Detector et al by ifyalways(f): 3:30pm On Apr 28, 2008
nice one.think it has been posted before,nevertheless,it still ROCKS.
Re: Lie Detector et al by crisp: 10:27am On Apr 29, 2008
Here's another:

A wife invited some people to dinner. At the table, she turned to their six-year-old daughter and said, "Would you like to say the blessing?"
"I wouldn't know what to say," the girl replied.
"Just say what you hear Mommy say," the wife answered.
The daughter bowed her head and said, "Lord, why on earth did I invite all these people to dinner?"
Re: Lie Detector et al by clemcykul(f): 12:50pm On Apr 29, 2008
no mata what robot is invented i will surely continue lying.

*goes off to lie to seun dat he is well loved in nairaland*
Re: Lie Detector et al by crisp: 2:29pm On Apr 29, 2008
clemcykul:

no mata what robot is invented i will surely continue lying.

*goes off to lie to seun that he is well loved in nairaland*

Now that was the biggest lie ever told in the history of mankind. May you be delivered from the biggest blow from the robot as u r about to witness closes her eyes in expectation of the horror about to unfold grin

Repent! Repent! and choose to be truthful like me ouch, where did dat blow come from? cry
Re: Lie Detector et al by folly69(m): 2:44pm On Apr 29, 2008
lalalalalala lies
Re: Lie Detector et al by crisp: 3:38pm On Apr 29, 2008
folly69:

lalalalalala lies

Don't be so nasty! It was likely a 'stray' blow meant for Clemcykul

Talking about lies, read this:

A bus filled with politicians was driving through the countryside one day, on the campaign trail. The bus driver, caught up in the beautiful scenery,loses control and crashes into the ditch. A farmer living nearby hears the horrible crash and rushes out to discover the wreckage. Finding the politicians, he buries them.

The next day, the police come to the farm to question the man. "So you buried all the politicians?" asked the police officer. "Were they all dead?"

The farmer answered, "Some said they weren't, but you know how politicians lie."
Re: Lie Detector et al by crisp: 4:31pm On Apr 29, 2008
15 biggest Lies:

1. My bank's server is down.

2. You pay for this one, I'll pay next time.

3. You look great.

4. Of course I love you.

5. It's not the money, it's the principle of the thing.

6. , but we can still be good friends.

7. She means nothing to me.

8. Don't worry, I can go another 20 miles when the gauge is on "empty."

9. I was in a meeting.

10. I'll call you later.

11. I've never done anything like this before.

12. I'm from your government, and I am here to help you.

13. I DO.

14[b]. He's the best thing that happened to me

15. I took my time to find Mr Right[/b]

Y not add to the list.

will be back with my comments on the above
Re: Lie Detector et al by clemcykul(f): 4:38pm On Apr 29, 2008
crisp who told u am a liar? do u know how many people i sonsor in cambridge university?

*awww damn! that blow is tooooooooo muchhh yeeeeeeeeee!*
Re: Lie Detector et al by TOYOSI20(f): 4:44pm On Apr 29, 2008
Both really nice.
Re: Lie Detector et al by crisp: 12:05pm On May 05, 2008
crisp:

[b]15 biggest Lies:

Behold, the unsaid

1. My bank's server is down. Interesting how this happens only when you need to pay your debts

2. You pay for this one, I'll pay next time. There'll never be a next time

3. You look great. You said same to Seal yesterday

4. Of course I love you. lipsrsealed

5. It's not the money, it's the principle of the thing. Behold! The world's greatest Miser.

6. , but we can still be good friends. Anything to get out of this relationship

7. She means nothing to me. Yeah, just like my parents, siblings and childhood pals mean nothing to me.

8. Don't worry, I can go another 20 miles when the gauge is on "empty." Confess! u can't afford to fill your tank

9. I was in a meeting. Yeah, right. A meeting with a very gorgeous girl in her room

10. I'll call you later. "Later" meaning anytime in the distant future

11. I've never done anything like this before. Hear the pro talking

12. I'm from your government, and I am here to help you. It might be sligthly more comforting to hear this coming from an acclaimed fraudster

13. I DO. If you're talking of the other 'DO', you may be right afterall

14[b]. He's the best thing that happened to me. Well true, only after James, Akpan, Hassan, Emeka,

15. I took my time to find Mr Right[/b] or was it time that went fast ahead of you?

Y not add to the list.


Re: Lie Detector et al by oluyemimi(f): 1:18pm On May 08, 2008
good ;d
Re: Lie Detector et al by Nobody: 4:05pm On May 08, 2008
not bad
Re: Lie Detector et al by clemcykul(f): 9:26am On May 09, 2008
*grins happily*
Re: Lie Detector et al by crisp: 11:08am On May 15, 2008
Now, a riddle for u:

Question: How can you tell when a lawyer is about to tell a lie?

Answer: His lips start moving wink

no offense to all the lawyers in the house
Re: Lie Detector et al by crisp: 9:54am On May 23, 2008
A professor invented a lie detecting chair. Whenever anybody sitting in it told a lie, the chair would open up and dump the liar on the floor. During an experiment, a brunette sat in the chair and the professor asked her to tell about herself.
She began, "I think you are the best teacher I've ever had."
The chair immediately dumped her on the floor.
After the brunette left in a snit, a blonde sat in the chair. The professor asked her to tell something of her life.
She began, "I think -"
The next thing she knew, she was sitting on the floor.

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