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Leaving My Three Year Old In Other People's Care Terrifies Me. Is This Normal? by AudreyI(f): 5:43pm On Aug 14, 2013 |
Hi, It scares me silly to leave my child in other people's care regardless of who they are because I just feel like no one can take care of her as well as I do. Even when dh forces me to let her go on play dates I spend the whole time she's away freaking out, and asking myself a million 'what ifs' Here's a little incident: i was forced to leave her in the care of a neighbourto go get something in an area where a bit of road construction was going on(I considered the area unsafe for her)When I returned about fifteen minutes later, this neighbour had allowed my daughter to go out with another neighbour and her kids. I freaked out, and was jittery until they returned about 40minutes later. So guys, am I going overboard with my concerns for her safety, or am I well within reasonable limits? I'd love to hear from parents especially. |
Re: Leaving My Three Year Old In Other People's Care Terrifies Me. Is This Normal? by biolabee(m): 6:10pm On Aug 14, 2013 |
No....its a normal maternal instinct You have to be diligent in identifying schools/creches that will be faithful in their care Na god dey look after pikin |
Re: Leaving My Three Year Old In Other People's Care Terrifies Me. Is This Normal? by AudreyI(f): 6:22pm On Aug 14, 2013 |
Thanks Biola. My husband and mum think I am overdoing it. Good to know someone thinks I am not paranoid. i think part of it is that she's a girl, and i know perverts abound. I can't even leave her in the care of any male. |
Re: Leaving My Three Year Old In Other People's Care Terrifies Me. Is This Normal? by biolabee(m): 6:42pm On Aug 14, 2013 |
Girls are double assignment One has to emphasize good communication that her private area is private n no one shd tell her notto talk Better shes talkative that even helps with identifying mood changes Sadly, pervs dey town |
Re: Leaving My Three Year Old In Other People's Care Terrifies Me. Is This Normal? by owners: 1:57pm On Aug 15, 2013 |
I feel is motherly instinct. I do the same to my kids unconsiously, and people around complain, but then as we play our part as parents, we should also hand them over to God almighty to keep watch over them. All the best. |
Re: Leaving My Three Year Old In Other People's Care Terrifies Me. Is This Normal? by Nobody: 2:28pm On Aug 15, 2013 |
biolabee: No....its a normal maternal instinctyes na God dey take care of pikin but awon olufunmi and olutomo don turn rapist and child f,,,,,,iiiiiiii,,,,,,,,,,#gerers abeg take care of your kids because the way paedophiles dey increase ehen,e dey do me like say make rent body guards for pikin abeg op carry your pikin wherever you dey go,nobody is to be trusted this days,them no dey write paedophile/rapist for head 8-) |
Re: Leaving My Three Year Old In Other People's Care Terrifies Me. Is This Normal? by Nobody: 2:40pm On Aug 15, 2013 |
biolabee: Girls are double assignmentsadly our former neighbour who sells food for police men and miscreants had a 12 year old daughter that those her mothers customers used to hit her buts and be raising her breasts up in a mischevious manner whenever the mother is not around,along the line she got preggy at 14,the mother took her for abortion and when i went to buy some things in our former house, 2 years later,i passed by her and we exchanged pleasanteries,i said victoria nko and the way she responded i knew something was wrong,i called her and asked her why she responded to me like that she said victoria ti di ashewo o.i was like what nonsense are you saying,what were you looking at that she degenerated to that level,asewo at 16,she said yes,that she has begged her severally her friends will chase her out of the brothel where she stays and when they were touching her bom bom and breast you will keep quiet and say oro aje ni,now victoria don go haywire,she said i should help her talk to victoria,i said emike? The highest i can do is talk to her whenever we jam but to enter the brothel where she stays,eledami ko.she was like ok o.bottomline is that some under aged girls that are prostitutes today started from their mothers carelessness to their kids |
Re: Leaving My Three Year Old In Other People's Care Terrifies Me. Is This Normal? by Nobody: 2:49pm On Aug 15, 2013 |
Audrey I: Hi, So you spend 24hrs everyday with your child? Does she not go to school (pre-nusery of some sort) Are you a stay at home mum? I think you are being unnecessarily paranoid and over protective. A 3-year old can talk and should be safe around relatives, sitters or neighbors. You need to concentrate on teaching her right and wrong, how to react in case of emergencies, how to know when someone is doing something wrong to her and be able to report back to you. I know it's really hard watching them grow up, but you can't keep her at home for the rest of her life. 1 Like |
Re: Leaving My Three Year Old In Other People's Care Terrifies Me. Is This Normal? by biolabee(m): 3:24pm On Aug 15, 2013 |
Kuly... u no fit enter ayilara square.. I think say u be hard babe naaaau kulyie: sadly our former neighbour who sells food for police men and miscreants had a 12 year old daughter that those her mothers customers used to hit her buts and be raising her breasts up in a mischevious manner whenever the mother is not around,along the line she got preggy at 14,the mother took her for abortion and when i went to buy some things in our former house, 2 years later,i passed by her and we exchanged pleasanteries,i said victoria nko and the way she responded i knew something was wrong,i called her and asked her why she responded to me like that she said victoria ti di ashewo o.i was like what nonsense are you saying,what were you looking at that she degenerated to that level,asewo at 16,she said yes,that she has begged her severally her friends will chase her out of the brothel where she stays and when they were touching her bom bom and breast you will keep quiet and say oro aje ni,now victoria don go haywire,she said i should help her talk to victoria,i said emike? The highest i can do is talk to her whenever we jam but to enter the brothel where she stays,eledami ko.she was like ok o.bottomline is that some under aged girls that are prostitutes today started from their mothers carelessness to their kids |
Re: Leaving My Three Year Old In Other People's Care Terrifies Me. Is This Normal? by Nobody: 4:27pm On Aug 15, 2013 |
biolabee: Kuly... u no fit enter ayilara square..heheheh emike,with all the ehona wey dey there.olorun maje.if we be more than one na,ok,but to go alone satani deyin leyin mi o |
Re: Leaving My Three Year Old In Other People's Care Terrifies Me. Is This Normal? by biolabee(m): 4:46pm On Aug 15, 2013 |
kulyie: heheheh emike,with all the ehona wey dey there.olorun maje.if we be more than one na,ok,but to go alone satani deyin leyin mi o ooo ti e le/// ase enu nikan lo ni I will go with u... I go run sha if dem pour water on top me ooo i no know the kain water |
Re: Leaving My Three Year Old In Other People's Care Terrifies Me. Is This Normal? by blank(f): 4:48pm On Aug 15, 2013 |
I don't think its normal. Feels like over parenting to me. This is the time to teach her what to do and how to react to certain events, etc. The most important thing is to allow her out either under supervision or to trusted adults. You cannot protect her from all the evils in the world. My opinion o. |
Re: Leaving My Three Year Old In Other People's Care Terrifies Me. Is This Normal? by juman(m): 5:24pm On Aug 15, 2013 |
I think you have just one child now, by the time you have more child/children you go relax a bit. |
Re: Leaving My Three Year Old In Other People's Care Terrifies Me. Is This Normal? by greatgod2012(f): 5:51pm On Aug 15, 2013 |
juman: I think you have just one child now, by the time you have more child/children you go relax a bit. I agree with you! By the time the op has 2 or 3 or more, no one will tell her to relax. However, I believe that girls need more protection, but we can't be around them all the time, so, like Uju said, its better to train them up early enough to be able to identify danger zone, dangerous touching and dangerous caring from outsiders. May God help us all. |
Re: Leaving My Three Year Old In Other People's Care Terrifies Me. Is This Normal? by AudreyI(f): 10:00pm On Aug 15, 2013 |
Thanks all. @Uju and greatgod, I am not a stay at home mum. She goes to school and the school also provides after school care till I pick her up. I have no problem with that and I am actually quite comfortable with the school. I also teach her to be careful, stay away from strangers, accept nothing from strangers and the like. It helps that she is highly intelligent. But for some reasons, I just cant trust her with neighbours and relatives. I know it is God who protects, still I feel like most people don't really pay as much attention as they should, especially to feamale children. One of my neighbours for instance leaves her child of same age at different people/neighbour's home practically all day. So, I really dont fancy leaving my daughter with her cos I imagine she'll do the same. She also tried to persuade me to leave my daughter in the care of her twenty something yr old brother. Oh well, I'll just chalk it up to being paranoid cos she's the only one for now. I hope I do relax after the second one like you guys say. @Kulyie: your first post had me laughing. |
Re: Leaving My Three Year Old In Other People's Care Terrifies Me. Is This Normal? by Nobody: 11:18pm On Aug 15, 2013 |
biolabee:thank you o.the 2 places where i have vowed never to go is police station and brothels.eledami ko |
Re: Leaving My Three Year Old In Other People's Care Terrifies Me. Is This Normal? by biolabee(m): 6:38am On Aug 16, 2013 |
kulyie: thank you o.the 2 places where i have vowed never to go is police station and brothels.eledami ko Nothing do u..... carry goooo |
Re: Leaving My Three Year Old In Other People's Care Terrifies Me. Is This Normal? by biolabee(m): 6:41am On Aug 16, 2013 |
Pls dont leave with no broda abegiiiiiiii Continue your current arrangements Audrey I: Thanks all. @Uju and greatgod, I am not a stay at home mum. She goes to school and the school also provides after school care till I pick her up. I have no problem with that and I am actually quite comfortable with the school. 1 Like |
Re: Leaving My Three Year Old In Other People's Care Terrifies Me. Is This Normal? by Nobody: 7:06am On Aug 16, 2013 |
Re: Leaving My Three Year Old In Other People's Care Terrifies Me. Is This Normal? by damiso(f): 7:17am On Aug 16, 2013 |
Its normal with the first .The most important thing is to make you can trust (to an extent) who you are leaving her with.Though there are so many pervs out there, , there are still loads of good people out there. A 3 yr old though can talk esp as you said she is intelligent so its a lil easier.I had that anxiety when my daughter was much younger and I was going back to work . People kept volunteering or giving me cheaper alternatives that I was not comfortable with. In the end I settled for a childcare arrangement that was pricey but gave me peace of mind. |
Re: Leaving My Three Year Old In Other People's Care Terrifies Me. Is This Normal? by AudreyI(f): 8:28pm On Aug 16, 2013 |
Thanks all. @ Madam CC, Biolabee and Damiso: Great insight as always. Most of the problem I have is with holidays. But I did get some helpful hints on here, so thanks guys. May God bless your homes. |
Re: Leaving My Three Year Old In Other People's Care Terrifies Me. Is This Normal? by biolabee(m): 7:44am On Aug 17, 2013 |
It is well with you n ur family |
Re: Leaving My Three Year Old In Other People's Care Terrifies Me. Is This Normal? by Nobody: 5:44am On Aug 18, 2013 |
Audrey I: Thanks all. @ Madam CC, Biolabee and Damiso: Great insight as always. Most of the problem I have is with holidays. But I did get some helpful hints on here, so thanks guys. May God bless your homes.orisirisi.nawa :p nawa o 8-) so na so you hate me reach you nor see me abi :p me sef no deserve common thank you |
Re: Leaving My Three Year Old In Other People's Care Terrifies Me. Is This Normal? by Nobody: 5:46am On Aug 18, 2013 |
Audrey I: Thanks all. @ Madam CC, Biolabee and Damiso: Great insight as always. Most of the problem I have is with holidays. But I did get some helpful hints on here, so thanks guys. May God bless your homes. |
Re: Leaving My Three Year Old In Other People's Care Terrifies Me. Is This Normal? by AudreyI(f): 10:25am On Aug 19, 2013 |
@Kulyie: so sorry about the omission. wasn't intentional. no vex. your comments were really appreciated. |
Re: Leaving My Three Year Old In Other People's Care Terrifies Me. Is This Normal? by Nobody: 11:05am On Aug 19, 2013 |
Audrey I: @Kulyie: so sorry about the omission. wasn't intentional. no vex. your comments were really appreciated.ehe,correct good geh :p |
Re: Leaving My Three Year Old In Other People's Care Terrifies Me. Is This Normal? by Nobody: 11:50am On Aug 19, 2013 |
Audrey I: Thanks all. @Uju and greatgod, I am not a stay at home mum. She goes to school and the school also provides after school care till I pick her up. I have no problem with that and I am actually quite comfortable with the school. Okay . . . now I get it! Please don't leave your child with people you don't trust. Better safe than sorry . . . |
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