You heard there was another bomb blast yesterday? Not in maiduguri this time,in a new place,dama-something,yes,people died.Those mallams are serious o.We cant stop them again,i saw it coming.After the police did their mago-mago and executed yusuf in jail,wetin you expect?Trouble,of course! Those abokis are not cows-you can't control them by cutting off the head,by killing their leaders,i will tell u free of charge,yusuf's murder was a big mistake.And the army made matter worse.Too many people died,my friend ,just too many.You saw pictures? Home made guns and cutlasses-against automatic rifles and grenades;bodies scattered everywhere like firewood.But that's what happens when you recruit stark illiterates into your police and army.Open extortion,rampant brutality.Senseless shootings.See odi,see apo six,see ogoni nine and now boko haram.

don't get me wrong o,i'm against those mallams.I think they should be dealt with,they must face justice for all the innocent blood they have spilt.Nobody happy pas me when their leader was caught.But the police made a mess of it,they went and shot the man just like that.For what?Why not take him to court? Why so little respect for the law.For people's rights,for human life?Now we are paying the price.


I have'nt told you the time i was arrested by the police?Ah.It was'nt easy o.See me,just standing on my own,buying suya from a mallam one night around ten or eleven p.M when a police van appears and seven policemen jumps out and start rounding everybody.Stupid me,i started shouting that what have i done,that i was coming back from work.That see my company i.D,next thing i knew"Gbam" straight in the face. Have you ever been struck with a gun?I can tell you for free that when you feel the blow,you will follow orders like a mumu.I jumped into the van

After we arrived at the station,they made us form a single file,and then they searched us and took away our belts and bags,they seized anything they said we could use to kill ourselves.There were eighteen of us.Two were women and four were boys,the youngest no more than thirteen.Yes o,that's our police,going around arresting children.Anyway,back to my story.As they led us to the station,one of the women,the younger one,began to cry,and then one after the other,the boys too started crying.I was afraid,i won't lie,very afraid.Especially when the prisoners started banging on the cell bars and shouting"FRESH MEAT,and"BRING THEM HERE MAKE I TEAR THEIR YANSH OPEN".You can laugh now,but i'm telling you,it was'nt funny.

there were two cells at the back of the station,one was filled and that nah were all the shouting came from,but the other cell held only two women,prostitutes i think.The policemen unlocked the cell and waved the women out,but they didn't release them o,they ordered them to sit on the floor behind the counter along with the two women who were arrested with us,well,they stuck us in that cell,the men and the boys,and locked us in without telling us"wetin we do".

Na me enter the cell first,so i got a good spot right by the door.You know how our jails are:no toilet,shiit on the floor,on the walls,piss stinking everywere.I was there for three days and when i got out i burned the clothes i had on,smelled so bad.The smell stayed with me for weeks.And the mosquitoes.Fat wit blood,zzzing in my ears all night long.The heat nko?Sixteen people in a space that was too tight for ten,and no place to sleep,feet everywhere.But how could i sleep? I did'nt know whyi was arrested,i was afraid of getting robbed,and when the next morning the policemen told us we are armed robbery suspects,and demanded we pay for our freedom,i found i didn't have enough money on me,tell me,how i wan sleep?I could'nt shut my eyes for three seconds in the three days i spent in that cell.

Abeg,my friend,forget our police,nah me dey tel u.Sometimes they deserve the mago mago boko haram dey do them.Do you know those policemen no gree us phone anybody,they didn't give us food,they didn't have the cell cleaned in all the time i was there? Release us for free?Dont make me laugh?By afternoon of the third day,most people had managed to bail themselves and i was left alone in that cell with those four boys and and old one-armed hausa man who i suspect was a beggar.Three of those boys were bus conductors and one was a mechanic's apprentic.None had ever stepped inside the four walls of a school.Thank God for the boys,nah their money wey finaly save me,yes o.I borrowed money from those children to add to what i had.And it still wasn't enough,so i had to beg the policemen to accept my bribe.After i was released,i headed straight to my bank to withdraw some money,even though my cloths stinks like hell due to condition in that cell,then i went back to the police station and paid for the release of the four boys and the old mallam.The boys were happy to see me ehn-they were convinced that i wouldn't keep my word.They later told me that all the time i was away,the policemen kept taunting them for being stupid enough to hand over all their money to a stranger..Even called them bastards.

After wetin i suffer for police hand,you think i will see any policeman tody and call him my friend..






(MAKE I SLEEP,I GET SERVICE TO GO 2MORO.More post ahead.Stay tuned.)

Some mönths ago i was travelling in a bus along the lagos-benin highway when we noticed that cars ahead were turning back.Our driver asked what the matter was and we learned that armed robbers were operating in front.We had passed a police checkpoint about ten minutes earlier,so our driver decided to drive back and alert them.When we got to the checkpoint,our driver stopped beside their van and started shouting"armed robbers! Armed robbers are operating in frönt! The policemen looked at us.Then the bus passengers added their voices;Armded robbers!! Are on the road!,they are shooting and killing people and nobody can pass! Hurry before they escape! The policemen kept on staring at us.So i got down from the bus and ran over to the police inspector.Who was sitting on the bonnet of the van,listening to rapala on his mobile phone music player.I said 'excuse me,officer,but didn't you hear us? The inspector looked at me up and down.Then stuck the mobile phone in his breast pocket,slid off the bonnet,walked to the open driver's door of the police van,leaned in and yanked the key from the ignition,then marched back to me,thrust the key in my face,and said angrily,"take! You go after them! Idiot!" yes o,it's a true story.That's the nigerian police for you..Shameless cowards..
If anything's worse than the police in this country,its the army.
LET ME TELL you what my eyes saw in warri not long ago,when the niger delta militants were still fighting their own fight.One day,i was sitting in a beer parlou,sipping my beer jeje,enjoying myself cooleh.There was a military checkpoint on the road in front of this beer parlour,one of those JTF ones,with sandbags and oil drums and big antitank guns.It looked like a warzone.To cut a long story short,the soldiers at the checkpoin had caught one okada rider who tried to scamper after they flagged him down to collect their usual fifty naira.If you see how those kahki boys beat this okada guy ehn! I swear,even him mother for no recognize am at all at all.After them beat am finish,them tie him hand and legs together like a sallah ram and dumped him by the bushes on the side of the road.Yes o.Upon all the beating them still planned to lock him in the guardroom.But somehow the man loosed the ropes and sneaked away.Ah! You for don see how those soldiers vex when they found out he had excaped.They searched the bushes,they searched everywhere they came back and beat his okada until the thing scatter finnish.And yet they were still not satisfied.All the time this was goin on,i sat in the beer parlour watching them.Something told me to get up and leave,but i hadn't finished my beer.Then will u believe it,those soldiers.All six of them,just turned and marched towards the drinking palour,and i knew we were in trouble,they entered,and one of them shouted "you people were sitting here and you let that criminal escape? Oya everybody out! We will flog sense into ur heads today...

Some mönths ago i was travelling in a bus along the lagos-benin highway when we noticed that cars ahead were turning back.Our driver asked what the matter was and we learned that armed robbers were operating in front.We had passed a police checkpoint about ten minutes earlier,so our driver decided to drive back and alert them.When we got to the checkpoint,our driver stopped beside their van and started shouting"armed robbers! Armed robbers are operating in frönt! The policemen looked at us.Then the bus passengers added their voices;Armded robbers!! Are on the road!,they are shooting and killing people and nobody can pass! Hurry before they escape! The policemen kept on staring at us.So i got down from the bus and ran over to the police inspector.Who was sitting on the bonnet of the van,listening to rapala on his mobile phone music player.I said 'excuse me,officer,but didn't you hear us? The inspector looked at me up and down.Then stuck the mobile phone in his breast pocket,slid off the bonnet,walked to the open driver's door of the police van,leaned in and yanked the key from the ignition,then marched back to me,thrust the key in my face,and said angrily,"take! You go after them! Idiot!" yes o,it's a true story.That's the nigerian police for you..Shameless cowards..
If anything's worse than the police in this country,its the army.
LET ME TELL you what my eyes saw in warri not long ago,when the niger delta militants were still fighting their own fight.One day,i was sitting in a beer parlou,sipping my beer jeje,enjoying myself cooleh.There was a military checkpoint on the road in front of this beer parlour,one of those JTF ones,with sandbags and oil drums and big antitank guns.It looked like a warzone.To cut a long story short,the soldiers at the checkpoin had caught one okada rider who tried to scamper after they flagged him down to collect their usual fifty naira.If you see how those kahki boys beat this okada guy ehn! I swear,even him mother for no recognize am at all at all.After them beat am finish,them tie him hand and legs together like a sallah ram and dumped him by the bushes on the side of the road.Yes o.Upon all the beating them still planned to lock him in the guardroom.But somehow the man loosed the ropes and sneaked away.Ah! You for don see how those soldiers vex when they found out he had excaped.They searched the bushes,they searched everywhere they came back and beat his okada until the thing scatter finnish.And yet they were still not satisfied.All the time this was goin on,i sat in the beer parlour watching them.Something told me to get up and leave,but i hadn't finished my beer.Then will u believe it,those soldiers.All six of them,just turned and marched towards the drinking palour,and i knew we were in trouble,they entered,and one of them shouted "you people were sitting here and you let that criminal escape? Oya everybody out! We will flog sense into ur heads today...

Ah me? To let those soldiers brutalise me like i saw them do to that guy?? I started begging o,all of us together started begging them.But you know our soldiers,they rufused to hear word.They started waving their guns,telling us to obey first and complain later.Believe you me,i thought my goose was cooked realy and truely.But the good lord intervened.The drinking parlour madam threw herself on the ground and started rolling around and begging the soldierz not to spoil her business for her.They only agreed to forgive us after she promised each of them three free bottles of beer.Nah so i take escape dirgrace.
Wait,now the story hasn't finished,so all of us sat down,drinking our beers,waiting for those soldiers to finish theirs and take their leave.Everybody was quiet,nobody said pim-only the soldiers were talking and laughing.Then one Rasta man with a guitar walked into the beer parlour.I was closest to the door,and the rastaman strolled up to my table and started strumming his guitar and singing and shaking his dada hair.I could'wmt hear anything he was singing,i just watched him carry his noise and go away.

Small time,the soldiers' table fell silent.When i looked,they were all staring at Rasta man ,then one of them said "come here".Mumu man,he walked happily to their table.The soldier asked him "what song are you singing?' and he answered "stir it up". The soldier asked 'Bob marley's version?" and he answered 'yes sir', the soldier said,'i love that song.Play it for me. 'H'm,Rasta man started,you know,twanging his guitar and shaking his dada,singing with energy.."stir it up; little darlin',stir it up.Come on,baby.Come on and stir it up,little darlin, stir it up. O-oh.Chi cha-cha cho.Cho....
I'm telling you,apart from the hook,Rasta man no sabi the song lyrics! Hah,yes o,it was so funny! There he was cha-cha cho-choing away,totally unaware of the storm that was gathering on that soldier's face.Then the soldier shouted "shut up! What are you singing? Na so bob marley sing am? See the way this bombaklat is butchering my song,and he waka around dey cul himself Rasta'

God save you.If i had scissors here,i for don cut off that your dada.Rasta man started to beg o,but the soldier said, 'shut your mouth! For spoiling my mood,you will stand here and sing that song until i release you.Only the chorus o,if you sing anything you don't know,i will slap your teeth scatter! Madam bring four bottles for me and my guys.This mumu rasta will pay.Oya start singing!! The soldier barked.

Nah so i see am o.It is funny,but it's not funny atol...Tanks y'll 4 reading.

mod fp na.i take God da beg na