Distraction or sheer forgetfulness, I couldn’t decide but whichever it was could have caused me a long time of misery or perhaps caused me a ‘chronic insomnic’ night.
Disclaimer: the views and what have you in this piece are all my own…so that aint in no way a reflection of nobody other than myself and whatever else man. No other man, woman or child represented heretofore and such hereby is sharing the opinion of the gentleman who be saying the shit contained within. This writeup contains foul language and stuff that might offend small children and old people. It should be noted by all those who are present here today that you’re all here on your own accord and if anybody not cool with that, they should leave now or forever hold their peace.
First, I thought Lagos was way overrated! But that’s why we constantly evolving. I don’t mean like that scenario where species that use to be tadpoles and crawled up out of the ocean and became lizards who became monkeys that became gorillas & then cavemen and next they sprout wings and all that mystery science bullshit. I’m talking facts. I’m saying we all started out as blank canvases and then we added some little scribbles here and a scribble there and pretty soon we either painted a masterpiece out of life or we got some mess that’ll look like something a 3 yr old drew on the wall behind the couch in crayolas mixed with dry play-dough and whatever whatever..Like I was saying, even if you don’t agree with something, it doesn’t mean you can’t respect it.
Lagos has some unseen hidden sovereignty governing the general existence of humanity within its geography. The crazy in other parts of the country and the world is the norm in Lagos and vice versa.
For those self-acclaimed Lagosians that see ‘migrants’ as aliens who shouldn’t be given the least opportunity for survival, how do you come into a house that was built by your forefathers and hang a plant in the corner and then be like YEAH, I’VE DONE MY PART, THIS HOUSE IS MINE NOW. No, you didn’t even remove your shoes when you came through the door, that’s disrespectful, son. Truth is, we’re all components of this big system called Lagos, no component functions more importantly than the other, like you can’t have the keyboard disrespect a mouse or the monitor disrespect a new software that’s just installed, the keyboard and mouse don’t even speak the same language or use the same programming code but they still understand each other. They all make the system work, whether the mouse or keyboard, software or hardware, whichever that was there before the other don’t make much difference in the long run. What’s important is that the system is functioning properly so long as the component work together to ensure that. At the end of the day, that’s what it’s all about, love and respect. I mean, I know love and respect don’t pay the bills but they can offer you other things like opportunities and longevity.
Hitherto, my visit to this city has been only on short vacation basis when I visit some relations and friends, but this was different; it’s been three months and counting answering the not-so-glorious-anymore clarion of a call, NYSC. Yeah, did I mention I’ve been a PH boy all my life, grew up and schooled in Port Harcourt and to a great measure, PH life mimics the Lasgidi life – the traffic, congestion, economy, social luxury and splendor, are all perfectly replicated in PH, no wonder often you have Lagosians relocating to Port Harcourt for a feel of the other side of the same pillow. Thus adapting to the Lasgidi life wasn’t difficult for me.
It was a typical independence day, 1st Oct., a public holiday that the workaholics in this town so crave. I couldn’t perceive any celebration no matter how hard I sniffed the air, perhaps there was really nothing to celebrate or maybe something is socio-politically wrong with my sense of smell, either way, I wasn’t part of whatever was going on that day, like how do you celebrate your country’s independence when as a man you haven’t attained economic independence? But that’s neither here nor there. The sun looked tired as it retreated, like it was exhausted from shinning on an incorrigible country, the moon and stars were themselves reluctant, the air was mist. The traffic situation was normal and by Lagos standard, that’s some snail-speed flow around popular routes. I had gone to Yaba to collect a camera I was to use on a project of mine, was on my way back to Ikeja, took about two hours given traffic and distance. It had been a busy day and my head was preoccupied with my project thoughts, “Owo da, Ogbeni Owo da”, the money-aggressive conductor yelled at me, my only business with him was to pay him, so I deduced he was asking for his money, couldn’t afford to add Yoruba to the catalogue of languages I’m learning, French and Spanish were already enough. I retrieved my wallet from my back-trouser pocket and handed him a N100 note, “Oya were ni” he bellowed at me throwing the money back, whatever the hell that meant I was quite sure he was displeased and wanted another N100. See, if you take a silverback ape and throw it in the ocean, there’s a good chance that the ape will drown anyways. I mean I’m no zoologist or nothing but I’ve never seen a gorilla take a dip in a river or a pond and do breast strokes, never mind the oceans mehn. There’s a good chance the ape will sink to the bottom of the ocean before a shark could even fight it. But at the same time, if you took a great white shark and threw it in the middle of the jungle in the Congo, there’s a good chance that he it’ll get torn up by that ape. Point is, there are turfs and this sure wasn’t mine. Reluctantly, I gave him N200.

Goto http://www.tobeehonest.com/ to complete

Try space out naa and summarize the whole stuff too long to read and comprehend

Wat happened na,r u writing a test book,or a bible.plz its 2 long.