Kids think quick

TEACHER : Maria, go to the map and find North America .
MARIA : Here it is!
TEACHER : Correct. Now class, who discovered America ?
CLASS : Maria!
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TEACHER : Why are you late, Frank?
FRANK : Because of the sign.
TEACHER : What sign?
FRANK : The one that says, "School Ahead, Go Slow."
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TEACHER: John, why are you doing your math multiplication on the floor?
JOHN : You told me to do it without using tables!
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TEACHER : Glenn, how do you spell "crocodile?"
GLENN : K-R-O-K-O-D-A-I-L"
TEACHER : No, that's wrong
GLENN : Maybe it s wrong, but you asked me how I spell it!
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TEACHER : Donald, what is the chemical formula for water?
DONALD : H I J K L M N O!!
TEACHER : What are you talking about?
DONALD : Yesterday you said it's H to O!
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TEACHER : Winnie, name one important thing we have today that we
didn't have ten years ago.
WINNIE : Me!
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TEACHER : Goss, why do you always get so dirty?
GOSS : Well, I'm a lot closer to the ground than you are.

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TEACHER : Millie, give me a sentence starting with "I."
MILLIE : I is,
TEACHER : No, Millie, Always say, "I am."
MILLIE : All right, "I am the ninth letter of the alphabet."
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TEACHER : Can anybody give an example of COINCIDENCE?
TINO: Sir, my Mother and Father got married on the same day, same time."
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TEACHER: George Washington not only chopped down his father's cherry
tree, but also admitted doing it. Now, Louie, do you know why his father
didn't punish him?"
LOUIS : Because George still had the ax in his hand.
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TEACHER : Now, Simon, tell me frankly, do you say prayers before eating?
SIMON : No sir, I don't have to, my Mom is a good cook,
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TEACHER : Clyde , your composition on "My Dog" is exactly the same as
your brother's. Did you copy his?
CLYDE : No, teacher, it's the same dog! ;
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TEACHER : Harold, what do you call a person who keeps on talking when
people are no longer interested?
HAROLD : A teacher.


Arrested for laughing, !!!


This is from an actual trial in the UK :

A young woman who was several months pregnant boarded a bus.

When she noticed a young man smiling at her she began feeling humiliated on account of her condition.

She changed her seat and he seemed more amused.

She moved again and then on her third move he burst out laughing, She had him arrested.

Then the case came before the court, the young man was asked why he acted in such a manner.

His reply was: When the lady boarded the bus I couldn't help noticing she was pregnant,

She sat under an advertisement, which read:
'Coming Soon: The Gold Dust Twins'.

I was even more amused when she sat under a shaving advertisement, which read: 'William's Stick Did The Trick'.

Then I could not control myself any longer when on the third move she sat under an advertisement, which read: "Dunlop Rubber would have prevented this accident".

The case was dismissed, !!!!!!!



Computer Dependency Test


Here's a quick & very simple test for you to take. This just proves that we have become way too dependent on our computers.

Q: How Many Legs You Have?

To find out the answer, look down,





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Look down, not scroll down!







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I love the second one. The man had the right to laugh.

arrested for laughing,that's funny man

the first sets of jokes are tight.
the second one is bad
but the last one stal small.
so overall i give u 7 over 10.
so u passed.
good one pastor
oops! i meant to say poster.