I'm crying tonight. I feel really awful. I rampaged against one of my twins, my 3 year old little angel. I hit her and I shouted and shouted and she was so scared of me. I never imagined I would be THAT mummy.

I'm TRYING to bring them up on my own and it's soo hard. My husband is in Nigeria and is an emotional cripple, i am pretty much a single mother. You take them out, you try to entertain them but it's never enough, nothing I do is ever enough, they are so demanding, sometimes I feel my head is going to explode.

There is soo much more background to my scenario, it just gets on top of me and I end up taking it out on my beautiful girls, I just need some coping mechanisms please if you have some motivational words or some parenting techniques you can give me. Any experience on developmental delay from anyone will be much appreciated

Awww. I can imagine. This stage for the kids can be very challenging for moms. You need to be calm and understand that it's not going to be this way forever. She is probably too young to understand why she was spanked. The good news is that children forgive easily.

Please don't be too hard on them. Yes they are demanding but you don't have to meet all their demands. Enjoy your time with them. We get frustrated sometimes, when we don't know what they want. Study them. Every act is for a reason. Learn to understand them.

I wish you the best.

Developmental delay as in Autism, speech delay, health issues etc?
Are you working with your child pediatrician ?
Do you have friends around you, plan with them to help you watch your child so that you can take a break.

I know a lot about autism as i am personally affected by this. I have a child who suffers from one. I know exactly what you are going through. If you need someone to talk to. you can always pm

Caracta: Awww. I can imagine. This stage for the kids can be very challenging for moms. You need to be calm and understand that it's not going to be this way forever. She is probably too young to understand why she was spanked. The good news is that children forgive easily.

Please don't be too hard on them. Yes they are demanding but you don't have to meet all their demands. Enjoy your time with them. We get frustrated sometimes, when we don't know what they want. Study them. Every act is for a reason. Learn to understand them.

I wish you the best.

Thanks for your kind words, yes o it's so frustrating. She is at an age where she goes to every room in the house and scatters it, give her food, she scatters it in every crevice and corner you can imagine, bathroom opens tap and water everywhere. I think we spend too much time together, they only do 3 hrs nursery a day and now they r on hols for 6 weeks . I do have a babysitter but cant use her much as it's so expensive. Family and friends do help once in a while but u know how UK is everyone is BUSY! And I do understand cos I too was busy before I had kids .just knackered

Caracta: Awww. I can imagine. This stage for the kids can be very challenging for moms. You need to be calm and understand that it's not going to be this way forever. She is probably too young to understand why she was spanked. The good news is that children forgive easily.

Please don't be too hard on them. Yes they are demanding but you don't have to meet all their demands. Enjoy your time with them. We get frustrated sometimes, when we don't know what they want. Study them. Every act is for a reason. Learn to understand them.

I wish you the best.

Thanks for your kind words, yes o it's so frustrating. She is at an age where she goes to every room in the house and scatters it, give her food, she scatters it in every crevice and corner you can imagine, bathroom opens tap and water everywhere. I think we spend too much time together, they only do 3 hrs nursery a day and now they r on hols for 6 weeks . I do have a babysitter but cant use her much as it's so expensive. Family and friends do help once in a while but u know how UK is everyone is BUSY! And I do understand cos I too was busy before I had kids .just knackered

OmoAlata1: I know a lot about autism as i am personally affected by this. I have a child who suffers from one. I know exactly what you are going through. If you need someone to talk to. you can always pm

Caracta: Awww. I can imagine. This stage for the kids can be very challenging for moms. You need to be calm and understand that it's not going to be this way forever. She is probably too young to understand why she was spanked. The good news is that children forgive easily.

Please don't be too hard on them. Yes they are demanding but you don't have to meet all their demands. Enjoy your time with them. We get frustrated sometimes, when we don't know what they want. Study them. Every act is for a reason. Learn to understand them.

I wish you the best.

Thanks for your kind words, yes o it's so frustrating. She is at an age where she goes to every room in the house and scatters it, give her food, she scatters it in every crevice and corner you can imagine, bathroom opens tap and water everywhere. I think we spend too much time together, they only do 3 hrs nursery a day and now they r on hols for 6 weeks . I do have a babysitter but cant use her much as it's so expensive. Family and friends do help once in a while but u know how UK is everyone is BUSY! And I do understand cos I too was busy before I had kids .just knackered

armyofone: Developmental delay as in Autism, speech delay, health issues etc?
Are you working with your child pediatrician ?
Do you have friends around you, plan with them to help you watch your child so that you can take a break.

hi, diagnosed as as development delay, she was sick for a long time, i thank God she is well now.

Yes oo, appointments with lots of different drs

OmoAlata1: I know a lot about autism as i am personally affected by this. I have a child who suffers from one. I know exactly what you are going through. If you need someone to talk to. you can always pm

Aww that's really lovely of you thanks. She wasn't diagnosed with autism but I would love to hear some of your coping mechanisms. Most of the problems I have with her is due to inability to communicate effectively. Her twin had a much lesser degree of delay but has almost caught up with her peers now.

E-hugs and cuddles to you I can sooo feel you.I know how I feel when hubby is working long hours or travelling.Sometimes it feels your head is about to explode esp for those of us who used to be very busy.I can say staying home with a toddler esp 2-3 year olds is one of the most frustrating things ever but you know what they are not going to be this young forever.

I am almost borderline OCD with cleanliness and I love my house sparkling all the time but you know what my 2yr old is beginning to cure me of this.I can't come and kill myself these I just leave the clutter till they go to bed and then tidy up then.Also try to maybe child proof things they scatter after coming downstairs to find the kitchen in a garri hurricane one fine morning no one taught me to put locks on all the bottom kitchen cabinets

Also try to establish an effect firm sleep routine I know its harder in the summer cos of the lighter nights but when they sleep early it gives you some time with yourself and to just breathe.

Also take them out if you can parks, galleries etc If you are in London register on groupon they have loads of offers on cheap days out. Horniman museum, Museum of London, Queen Victoria olympic park in stratford etc are free.Go to the royal festival hall they have a fountain sand pit rides etc.Just let them burn that energy.By the time you get home and fix dinner they are knackered and sleep early.

Join a toddler group with mums whi have kids ofsimilar ages and plan trips together.When they are playing you can watch them from afar and just generally have someone to gist with so you don't get bored.

It is well I know that feeling and we all lose it once in a while but just try to calm down sometimes when you are about to tear your hair out (believe me I know the feeling check out my rants in the funroom ) and remember these ones are a gift.Very soon they won't even come out of their rooms and you will crave for these days. again hugs

femilicious:

Aww that's really lovely of you thanks. She wasn't diagnosed with autism but I would love to hear some of your coping mechanisms. Most of the problems I have with her is due to inability to communicate effectively. Her twin had a much lesser degree of delay but has almost caught up with her peers now.

Just saw this do you think she might need speech therapy? I saw a speech therapist when I thought my son's communication was delayed . turns out he was not that delayed but you have to be veeeeery patient to deal with communicating with her.


You might have to come down to her level and try to phrase words and sentences in a way she might be easily able to grasp.For instance if when she wants water she just points to the tap or goes to the fridge you repeat it back to her " do you want water"? So she will start getting a better grasp of words.I know its tiring but talk to her alooot.Engage her in conversations ask her opinion at the supermarket 'should we get apples or pears' let her answer . The sibling in her case a twin might want to answer for her but call her name and let her be the one to answer.Spend time on books.I read two books to my kids every night and it really helps (hubby no get that kain time na one book and most times the shortest one on the shelf ).Make communication a two way street and with time you will see she will improve. Kids act out when they feel you don't understand them.

I was working full time when my daughter was a toddler so she picked up most of her communication skills away from me in full time nursery but with my son it was a bit more delayed and sincerely it was cos I did not speak to him as much as I needed to.He has really improved though with much help.I know there are cuts in the NHS now but you can speak to your health visitor and they can get you referrals if you feel you need help.

You are not alone, handling 3 kids under 5 by myself, I can really identify. Just take solace in the fact that they won't be kids forever. Sometimes I lock my self in for some minutes to avoid loosing my mind. I usually use the toilet, that way, no one comes yelling till am ready to be out.



Sometimes I just dump junks on them and that keeps them busy long enough for me to catch my breath. The TV helps a lot, i can also log onto NL and drown the chaos in my environment. If kids didn't drive you nuts, nothing will.