NIGERIA – While America is busy
injecting defenseless rats with the
Ebola virus to systematically extract
antibodies that can maybe “cure”
Ebola. A group of extraordinary
Africans have come together to find a
more humane and effective cure for
the disease. Sources confirm that this
potential cure does not involve
harming rats, monkeys or any sort of
animal and neither was it created in
any fancy or expensive African
research University or Hospital (that is
if they even exist). These brilliant
scientists… I mean pastors gathered
inside Africa’s most lavishly equipped
and weekly funded medical research
facility… the Nigerian church… where
several other cures have been
discovered in the past couple of years.
Including the cure for Aids, the cure for
Cancer, the cure for Poverty and even
the cure for Boko Haram - just ask
Pastor T.B. Joshua! So while America
is still playing around with rats, these
Nigerian pastors are hard at work
trying to find a permanent Human
solution for Ebola and they are close!
Their proposed cure, unofficially called
Annointing-Oil-ZTM, has significant
advantages over the recent American
Z-mappTM serum used recently on 2
American health workers. For starters it
does not need to be administered
intravenously, it can be administered
with a simple push, I mean touch of oil
to the forehead. Another advantage is
that the oil is not temperature
sensitive. Unlike the Z-mappTTM
serum that has to be kept at subzero
temperature and thawed out naturally,
the Annointing-Oil-ZTM has shown
significant stability in both low and high
temperatures. With just a few
scriptures and Annointing-Oil-
ZTM patients who had the Ebola fever
or Malaria fever (or any kind of fever
for that matter) instantly showed
a dramatic improvement in their
condition. Data is inconclusive at the
moment on the full potential of the
drug and whether it can
be commercialized in the near future.
However, the initial results are
promising and as more and more
pastors from top Nigerian religious
institutions come together to tackle
this disease, the chances of a
commercial solution rise even higher.
What is most interesting about this
cure is that it is 100% crowd funded by
thousands of worshipers every week. In
addition to that, the Government gives
significant tax breaks to these religious
research facilities to encourage their
research work. “Without the
Government tax breaks we would
struggle to maintain our research
facilities and also struggle to expand
our health and healing ministries,” said
Nigerian Clergyman Titus Theophilus,
who explained that the Government
tax breaks plays a significant role in
ensuring that the ministry is well
funded. “Thanks to them (The
Government) we are able to get our
message across to other parts of West
Africa and have even been able to
purchase a private jet for our head
Pastor in case he needs to meet with
other top researchers from across the
world.” So while the American
Government is busy spending millions
of dollars to build top University/
Hospital research facilities and killing
rats and monkeys in the process, the
Nigerian Government is instead
busy investing in a much humane and
arguably better solution which does not
put a burden on their tax payers, a
solution that is powered by weekly
crowd funded tithes with additional but
indirect support via Government tax
breaks. At the end of the day the
Nigerian solution is brilliant as it does
not put any pressure on the Nigerian
Government to address consistent
University strike issues or even
Hospital strike issues. I mean who
needs fully functional medical facilities
and top-notch University building when
your country has some of the largest
and most expensive churches in the
world? At this rate, a permanent end to
Ebola might just be around the corner
and it will shock the world to know that
the solution Annointing-Oil-ZTM was
made in Nigeria! NOTE: No rats were
harmed in the writing of this article.

Is this for real?

I still can't fathom how some peeps would derive pleasure in making a joke out of a matter of life and death.

May God Almighty protect our family, friends, loved ones and the good people of this world from every deadly virus.