Divorce is such a harsh and definitive end to a
marriage that once had life, that once held so
many dreams. People often throw the “D” word
around during arguments or when they are upset
and mad, as a means of getting back at their
partner. But when a partner threatens divorce, they
are doing so emotionally, and not logically. Before
you use this threat, you need to be very sure a
divorce is something you are really willing to go
through with…
1. If your marriage is having problems, the best
way to handle it is to figure out what those
problems are and learn how to overcome them.
Divorce does not allow you to do that. It abruptly
stops the relationship before there is a chance for
reconciliation. This gives an immediate halt to a
relationship before anything can be resolved. This
void will cause an endless list of “what if”
scenarios that will haunt both of you for the rest of
your lives.
2. When divorce is mentioned by a partner, it is
often a surprise to the other partner. Numerous
thoughts begin to race through the surprised
partner’s mind. “Did they find someone else?”
“How long have they been thinking about this?”
“Have they wanted this for awhile and were just
waiting for the right time to spring it on me?” None
of these negative perceptions might be true, but
once you introduce divorce into the conversation,
the damage begins…
3. Why would someone begin insinuating divorce
when they might not really want one? To hurt their
partner. Their partner has done something to them
and they now want to retaliate – pay them back so
to speak. What some partners don’t understand is
divorce is not a temporary pain.
This notion has to be used only under extreme
circumstances where there is absolutely no
possible chance for making any corrections in the
relationship. The relationship must have suffered
irreparable damage in order to consider such an
extreme action.
4. If you find yourself contemplating divorce, you
need to stop and think about what you are about to
do. Once this word is implied, you have opened up
a painful episode. Even if the two of you reconcile,
the idea you even suggested ending your marriage
might never be forgotten.
You have to make absolutely sure, without any
doubt whatsoever, you really do want a divorce, to
totally end the relationship you have with your
partner, before you make such a comment. If you
have even the slightest doubt in your mind, don’t
say it.
Are there destructive emotions at the heart of the
problems you are experiencing with your
relationship? If so, maybe you need to get control
of what you are really telling yourself. What are
your beliefs?
source:: naijamayor.com/must-read-sure-want-divorce/

Hmmmm....very deep and true. More grace to the writer.