delishpot:


To me o, its bad. If pastor wants to share it as in asking the church to pray for a bros going through so, so and so, its all well and good.
But I have heard pastors who want to preach about how devil can deal with christians who dont know God well and then they start listing cases of a sister who hasnt given birth after 20 yrs of marriage, A bros who cant find a wife even after getting shell job, a sister whose husband is cheating on her etc etc. These stories can hurt the person. These are things told the pastor in confidence o.
Many Pastors make it look like a christian going through hard times is a bad person or that God has left the person. Some pastors are just wicked sha.
Why the hell will people even take personal issues to pastors? . Some humans should not be judged based on the name they bear or the fancy clothes they wear. Do not give your secret to no one if you dont want it made public. Cos once its out, you cant control who the share it with or how they share it.
I for one follow that principle, I know that if I give out an info, it can be used against me, so I give out only those that if you use it against me one day, it wont bother me much I will only wonder what kind of a human being the peron is and congratulate myself for my ability to say less.
You want to share a problem? Talk to mom and dad, if you have none, talk to an adult that takes you as a child. They will listen to you, advice you and even pray for you everyday. Besides not everyproblem one has should be shared o. Sometimes, you need to hold your lips and look inward for encouragement.

♈όϋ hav a point here, but sometimes such issues can be treated as advice to those who have been towing dat lane or about to! The only way the pastor can save the day is by saying it when the said person is not around !

olaayodele:
I. Did a course while in the Bible college of my church(Pastoral theology).While treating the quality of a pastor, we were made to understand that as a good pastor, we should not mention the secrete or any confidential information obtained during counselling while preaching.May be your pastor did not undergo a thorough training.Based on what I was taught in Bible College, it is wrong in all ramification.I personally belief that if u mentioned it during a testimony period, the pastor can make reference to it while preaching

God bless u sire... 100000 likes. I have first hand experience of this topic

realteflon:

It's a bad thing. You pastor should do that. You feel the pastor is referring to you. And it wunt make you feel comfortable. Almost all the pastors do it

There is nothing bad in it, τ̲̅ђe only way I can condemn this act is when τ̲̅ђe pastor is saying it in the presence of the said person!

Teammi:
it happens in every church

that aint true. a priest will neva share info frm confession to pipu. Ask d cartels

freshness2020:

♈όϋ hav a point here, but sometimes such issues can be treated as advice to those who have been towing dat lane or about to! The only way the pastor can save the day is by saying it when the said person is not around !

Well we all know whoring is bad, a pastor can say if you hook around, you may end up catching an STD and those hookers may rip you off. And considering how this economy is, money that should be spent wisely will be spent looking for cure for something you could avoid. But most pastors I heard put it like this........ Just last week, I and pastor Dave were sitting at my office, a bro approached us, he is well known here, so I wont call his name. If you see this brother, you will pity him. Any way......... he came to me, to tell me he slept with a woman, then she stole his money, ontop of that, she gave him an STD and now he is running from post to pillar to find a cure, his boss has sacked him, his parents are poor and cant help him, he came to me because he was tired of life and wants to kill himself, etc ,etc. This is how most pastors put it.
Any way sha, I believe its not fair to tell what was spoken in confidence. Cos most members will starz gossiping and wondering which bro daddy was talking about.

Trust no man...why not go to God?

delishpot:


Well we all know whoring is bad, a pastor can say if you hook around, you may end up catching an STD and those hookers may rip you off. And considering how this economy is, money that should be spent wisely will be spent looking for cure for something you could avoid. But most pastors I heard put it like this........ Just last week, I and pastor Dave were sitting at my office, a bro approached us, he is well known here, so I wont call his name. If you see this brother, you will pity him. Any way......... he came to me, to tell me he slept with a woman, then she stole his money, ontop of that, she gave him an STD and now he is running from post to pillar to find a cure, his boss has sacked him, his parents are poor and cant help him, he came to me because he was tired of life and wants to kill himself, etc ,etc. This is how most pastors put it.
Any way sha, I believe its not fair to tell what was spoken in confidence. Cos most members will starz gossiping and wondering which bro daddy was talking about.

♈όϋ re so on point! It just a pity the bad one's are trying to overshadow the good shepherds among us! But that does not mean we should lose our confidence on the trusted one's.. Cos some issues are better shared than kept!

freshness2020:

♈όϋ re so on point! It just a pity the bad one's are trying to overshadow the good shepherds among us! But that does not mean we should lose our confidence on the trusted one's.. Cos some issues are better shared than kept!

Yeah true that.

vooks:
Paul shared with the Galatians how he rebuked Peter for his hypocrisy in Antioch.
What should your pastor do, write to all those whose life he intends to share on, good/bad and get consent?

At least your pastor never identified you unlike Paul. So grow up, get a life and enjoy your fifteen minutes of fame here on NL

You are the only daft human being on planet earth . Your miserable life will not get you anywhere in 2015. I will rather advice that u get a life and stop beefing others. If you can act this way to a stranger who hav not met! I can imagine how pathetic your life will be. We knw your type, who can't give kudos to efforts made by others to enlighten nairalanders. Thank God I ll never come across a dumb fellow like u in this world cos u ll be a great misfortune and calamity.

yemivictor:


Hmmm, a venomous woman and a self-righteous senior reverend i.e. if the man of God was going to ruin her marriage, she would ruin his career as well.

However, i would suppose that the woman's husband must have had prior knowledge of the secret. As for the reverend, what he did was totally wrong.

the Reverend was wrong? how? they dated in their university days.. don't tell me we all end up marrying our university dates

The greatest sermons being preached are people's past lives.

If your own is told and it was an ugly one , be glad cod you are not living in the past any longer
Or if you are still living such .
It's time to change.

I know and believed that if it were to be a good topic,
You wouldn't be complaining.

The Bible stories are made up of people's past life.

tenry:
One of my friends recently told me how his pastor was making reference to his challenges in the course of preaching to the congregation. According to him, he had been passing through some difflcult time and only went to his pastor for prayer and counselling, he was not expecting his pastor to cite his case as an example while preaching. Although he said the man of God didn't mention his name, the description and details released while preaching made him uncomfortable. I have also listened to pastors telling the congregation what church members have told them during counselling hour. How appropriate is this? Does it not meant to kept secret? Does a pastor has any right to share church members' secret without taking permission from them?

It is true pastors use such examples to buttress their points so the congregation can better relate to the message. But such pastors should be discreet enough so as not to release the identity of the person being used as an example, except of course if they have the permission of the person to share it.

Even the pastor may have made reference to his case in his message, how did he know the was speaking about him? Was his name mentioned?

freshness2020:

There is nothing bad in it, τ̲̅ђe only way I can condemn this act is when τ̲̅ђe pastor is saying it in the presence of the said person!

It's bad, using one's discussion as a topic in church. What happen to confidentiality

Most Pastors don't keep any secret and are gossipers. Immediately you discuss your privacy, they use it as a point of reference and also tell most of their close confidants. His wife who is not in the picture must know.

That is why most marriages break up as a result of women going to a Pastor to tell him her private problems. And when they leave that church for another church, the pastor would know use his/her case as a reference point.I have witnessed most telling their congregation what sister this did or brother that did when things goes wrong with their relationship.

For me, let your secret be your secret. Only God who created you knows your problems and you can take them to Him. Most modern pastors now are in flesh instead of the spirit nd cannot control their mouth. You better keep your problems to yourself.

Una sabi talk for this nairaland sha. Are you people seeking attention?

@OP, your friend is lucky he did not mention his name. He should just keep on with his life and watch what he says to such pastor.

My own experience, the pastor called my name and even the name of the person that was involved and we were both known by almost all the members of the church. What i did? I just moved away, far, from the church and stopped any form of communication with the pastor. I also forbade my wife from having any type of communication with him. #lobatan#

iamchiddy:
If it was to admonish, encourage, counsel and correct the congregation without mentioning his name then he had nothing to worry about.

SECONDED

toludadon:


the Reverend was wrong? how? they dated in their university days.. don't tell me we all end up marrying our university dates

Sir, i think you need to read the opening story again. There are two reverends, a senior one and a junior one.
The junior one dated the lady in University while the senior one was confided in but spilled the beans in a vindictive and self-righteous manner.
This is bad! Reverend or no reverend.

yemivictor:


Sir, i think you need to read the opening story again. There are two reverends, a senior one and a junior one.
The junior one dated the lady in University while the senior one was confided in but spilled the beans in a vindictive and self-righteous manner.
This is bad! Reverend or no reverend.

now I get you.. you know I wrote the story.. so I thought you were blaming the junior Reverend that dated the lady in the uni...

Not really what is private it should be kept private, no matter what. This is what God said: go into your room and pray in secret, and what he see's in secret He will reward you. Is God given us a message here?
I had a strange experience with a pastor, about some issue's, I waited 3 weeks to see him, after telling the pastor my problems, hoping he could give me some good advise, after feeling down and tormented from my ordeal, his only words "were" you know what to do.
I walked out from seeing the pastor' hoping I would feel a lot better, lucky I wasn't suicidal, I would have done the job.
After praying to Christ for some time he had strengthened me, and I managed to walk through the shadow of death, where I feared no evil.
But we have all got to remember pastor's are not trained councillors, their job is to preach the word of God. Usually we would think Churches would have proper Councillors, but most of them don't. Churches are suppose to be a house of healing, and Counselling is part of that healing.
We hear of so many different stories about our Pastors around the globe, counselling alone with married and single women, If Pastors were councillors, we wouldn't hear of the many stories of pastors running off with them, leaving their own marriages behind. Pastors are not Councillors, and its not their job to act like one either.