Hi everyone
Quarrelling in marriage is it the sign that the duo are not compartible? How often did husband and wife should quarrel that is permissible? Finally how did u handle it? I need mature answer and expecially from married people.

Usually in the early marriages, a lot of things may cause arguments and disagreements as both of them r from different background wit different orientation. But with time, they will get to agree on a lot of things and the frequency of quarel will reduce.

There's basically no healthy Marriage witout disagreement. And the frequency doesn't determine compatibility.
The most important thing is having a common goal and ability to manage the issue so it doesn't get out of hand.

It's not a power tussle or battle of who is right. When we disagree, we always find a common ground to decide how things will work best. If there's nothing to achieve frm an argiement or if it's not going to affect d marriage, I don't stir it up, I just overlook cos I love to enjoy peace.

SUV:
Usually in the early marriages, a lot of things may cause arguments and disagreements as both of them r from different background wit different orientation. But with time, they will get to agree on a lot of things and the frequency of quarel will reduce.

There's basically no healthy Marriage witout disagreement. And the frequency doesn't determine compatibility.
The most important thing is having a common goal and ability to manage the issue so it doesn't get out of hand.

It's not a power tussle or battle of who is right. When we disagree, we always find a common ground to decide how things will work best. If there's nothing to achieve frm an argiement or if it's not going to affect d marriage, I don't stir it up, I just overlook cos I love to enjoy peace.

wow thanks a lot. But two years marriage still quarrelling don't u think sometin is wrong?

It depends on the stage of the marriage - early years, later? Also depends on the causes of the quarrels.

Quarreling does not necessarily mean incompatibility, it may just be learning to live with each other, learning to accommodate each other in your personal space. Compatibility should have been ironed out in courtship if each person knows what they are doing and not just rushing into marriage.

We had our fair share of quarrels in the early years, mainly because of my temperament but at this stage, the absolute worst would be a 5 minute argument about something. As time goes on, you grow into each other and become more tolerant as you learn to ignore stuff that could/would have caused quarrels in the past.

Saao:
Hi everyone

1.Quarrelling in marriage is it the sign that the duo are not compartible?
2.How often did husband and wife should quarrel that is permissible?
3.Finally how did u handle it? I need mature answer and expecially from married people.

1.No... Nobody's perfect buddy. A marriage without quarrel is almost impossible. Although I'm talking healthy quarrel (e.g arguments, which I'm not a big fan of coz it's always end up in resentment, cruel words are said and cannot be taken back) not domestic violence kind oh.

2. I wouldn't proffer a dose of quarell per month/year. Infact I'd say avoid it if possible and rather have the Talk .
But. Couples need to realize that constant fight chips off the affection between you two, constant fights and argument is not healthy atall. And if you must fight, please do it with common sense and be rational about other persons feelings.

3.over the years, I've learnt to stay calm and collected, listen to music, take a dip in swimming pool or run/jog around the block to blow off some steam to clear my head. I realized and learnt how it calms the tension btw both of us and our kids are safe and protected from drama. I really don't like the picture of kids watching parents argue, it's not healthy for their overall wellbeing.

Good Topic Saao, I hope young/intended couples can learn from this.
cc. Chaircover, Greatgod2012,Damiso, Naijababe, Edwife, lyndaroyce and co

Ewuro4:

1.No... Nobody's perfect buddy. A marriage without quarrel is almost impossible. Although I'm talking healthy quarrel (e.g arguments, which I'm not a big fan of coz it's always end up in resentment, cruel words are said and cannot be taken back) not domestic violence kind oh.
2. I wouldn't proffer a dose of quarell per month/year. Infact I'd say avoid it if possible and rather have the Talk .
But. Couples need to realize that constant fight chips off the affection between you two, constant fights and argument is not healthy atall. And if you must fight, please do it with common sense and be rational about other persons feelings.
3.over the years, I've learnt to stay calm and collected, listen to music, take a dip in swimming pool or run/jog around the block to blow off some steam to clear my head. I realized and learnt how it calms the tension btw both of us and our kids are safe and protected from drama. I really don't like the picture of kids watching parents argue, it's not healthy for their overall wellbeing.
Good Topic Saao, I hope young/intended couples can learn from this.
cc. Chaircover, Greatgod2012,Damiso, Naijababe, Edwife, lyndaroyce and co

Well said sis you don talk am finish. .Cant emphasise how much parents need to spare their children their couple dramas and issues. Children can sense tension.

Unless you are flatmates, I'd say a quarrel is healthy for a marriage. It means you both still care, I don't know how often is considered healthy though. I often put the tip of my tongue on the roof of my mouth to stop myself from saying things I will regret plus I have learned the transience of my emotions, I remind myself always that the subject of each quarrel would become insignificant over time.

While I do not advocate having shouting battles in front of children, I think it healthy for children to understand conflicts occur and can be resolved.