Chai! This country don hard o. The economy seems to be on a stand still and the other day when i went out to do some transactions in Lagos, I live in a bush in Sagamu, the look on people’s faces was scary. Maybe because it was evening when I made my observation and most people were already tired after a hard day’s work or lack of a job. Either way, many people were not smiling.

Fortunately, i’m an optimist, we seem to have found ourselves in a country that doesn’t work and we are faced with problems and challenges that life will inevitably throw at us whether we like or are prepared for it or not.

Fortunately, again these challenges are our friends. They are there to teach us to appreciatie life, they are there to give us experience, they are there to make us stronger, they are there to make us more prepared to face future problems. Your problems and challenges are part of your guide through life and work together with you with the aim of creating the person you will eventually become and be remembered for. You cannot control what happens to you, but you can control how you react towards it.

I will like to share some thought patterns and realizations I have found to be very helpful which I have used in strengthening my resolve to always be happy and focused in life despite whatever challenge is thrown at me. Irrespective of your situation, I’m certain you will be able to use these thoughts and realizations to create a pool of encouragement, enthusiasm and motivation for yourself so that you can take a swim whenever life’s heat becomes unbearable. Motivation is like a bath. You need it everyday.

Let’s get to it

1. I love myself: Whenever we are faced with loneliness, disappointment, rejection or all those other stuff that make us feel like we are at the bottom of the food chain and make us want to just reach out and hug someone or cry on someone else’s shoulder it is important that you continue to love yourself despite your own imperfections and insecurities. Many people go through life expecting love from outside when in reality, all that really matters is the love that you are able to create within yourself.

In the morning, as you start your day and even while you are at it, look into the mirror and tell yourself, “I love myself”, “I’m the best”, “I fine pass everybody”, “I am smarter than everyone”, “I am richer than everyone else”, “my dress code is the best”. Yes, be your own personal “hype man” because no one else will. Your ability to love and appreciate yourself will eventually create the space in your heart to handle life’s disappointments and love everyone else. For true love comes from within and when you love yourself unconditionally, you can create enough positive energy for yourself which will ultimately radiate to everyone else thus making you more lovable.

2. No one cares: This one is pretty blunt, huh? But that is really the basic truth. However, you can take solace in the fact that no one cares about you, they only care about what you have to offer. Just take a look at our celebrities, no one really cares about them and it’s evident especially on social media when Kcee, for instance, put on one of those his outfits. All him “fans” go immediately change am for am with insults and hate with so much heat it can melt steel.

But then they go out to a club or listen to his limpopo song or at home on tv or radio and you will hear stuff like “man, this guy badt gan. I like him music die!”. The only reason this happens is because his music is a source of entertainment or inspiration to them. They don’t really care about him but he has something that adds value to them. What do you have to offer? Are you the kind of person that when you walk into a room, you make people laugh? Are you a problem solver? Are you dependable and reliable in your workplace? What skills do you have that makes you stand out from others? Can you easily market other people’s products and thus increase their sales? Have you created something that can make things easier for people and can ease stress in certain areas of their lives?

Work on yourself. Have something to offer the world and people will show you love, most times fake, and sing your praises even after you are long dead NOT because they truly love you but because they can/have gained something from you. Even your closest friends and family are only there because they have something to gain from you. It could be that you are generous and whenever they are in need you help out or you are a great listener and thus always offer a listening and non judgmental ear or you are always willing to help out. Whichever it is, people only love you for what you have to give.

3. Who am I?: Stand in front of a mirror and ask yourself this question and give yourself a honest reply. You can also imagine you happen to be standing in the presence of your role model or even your crush and try as much as possible to give a satisfactory answer that will make whoever is asking you that question to say, “wow!”. The first time I asked myself this question, I was really nothing and maybe you aren’t much either. However, this should serve as a foundation to enable you define yourself and will inevitably lead you to ask yourself…….

4. Who do I want to be?: Do you want to be a millionaire? Do you want to be known as the best in your field? Do you want to build a formidable career? Do you want to own your business? Do you want to be the first Nigerian to reach Mars? Do you want to invent something that will totally change the way people live?

Ensure that whatever you decide upon is something you are willing to do for the rest of your life, that brings you joy and that you can also do for free. The passion behind your vision will strengthen your conviction towards achieveing your goal. Whatever it is, it has to be a clear and achievable to you. No one else has to believe it is possible. As long as that is what you want to be, then it is achievable. Believe in yourself. You might not have all you need to accomplish your goals but you have yourself and you have NOW at your disposal.

5. What do I have to do to achieve my goals?: Do you need to start a business? Do you need to acquire more skills? Do you need higher certification? Do you need to go back to school?

Whatever you need to do, write it down and let them be your guide. Whenever you seem to be going off track, go back to where you have written your goals and things you need to achieve them.

6. Who do you associate with?: Do you keep the right friends? Do you get inspired by sitting around all day talking about who will win the premiership or how close Chelsea is to discovering oil? Do you find yourself discussing how bad the economy is and how everywhere is hard and money is scarce? Go to the airport, people are frequently travelling around the world closing business deals. Dem get two heads? People buy new cars and houses daily, no be woman born them?

Surround yourself with people better than you. If you are unable to provide three square meals daily for yourself then you don’t need to be associating yourself with people in the same predicament. Don’t sit around with people who are comfortable with the position you are in. What you need to do is to surround yourself with people who have already overcome that challenge and you will be able to learn from them what you have to do to overcome your problems and get yourself on the path towards greatness.

7. What is the value of your time?: Or, what’s in it for you? Define your priorities and ask yourself like Steve Jobs did, “If this is the last thing I can do on earth, will I be doing it?” Will I be appreciated or paid for what I’m about to do? Will it help me accomplish my set goals? Will it be of benefit to the people around me? If it is not worth doing then there is no need to spend your time and energy doing it.

8. How long will it take to achieve my goals?: Have you ever been asked, “where do you see yourself in 5 years from now”? Five years might seem like such a long time but if you have experienced different sequences of “5 years”, you will realize how short it is.

Set a realistic timeline for your goals. Most people want to start a business or get employed and become millionaires within 6 months and then get discouraged when life throws challenges and obstacles at them and they are unable to meet their target within their specified time. Save yourself the stress.

It will please you to know that many experts believe that a business will only become successful after 5 years and even some university courses can take as long as 10 years, plus strike. Have you ever been asked, “where do you see yourself in 5 years from now”? Five years might seem like such a long time but if you have experienced different sequences of “5 years”, you will realize how short it is. Many successes such as Linda Ikeji, Seun Osewa, Dangote, Bill Gates, Mark of Facebook etc all went through their own teething stage at the beginning of their careers or businesses. And you will too!

9. Problems and challenges will come: Whether you like it or not. And your best defense is to be prepared to take up the challenge. View every obstacle that comes your way as an opportunity to strengthen yourself, try something new and gain more experience instead of as a reason to give up.

10. Every problem presents an opportunity: It might not always seem like it is but it is the truth. If you run a business, for example, and you are facing the problem of making sales, you can either decide to pack up or decide to try a new marketing strategy or even total re-branding.

You just have to be able to accept the fact that your problem is there to give you a new point of view about things. It doesn’t necessarily mean you have failed but only means that you need to try something new or even simply appreciate your space when you are not faced with any challenge.

11. You are not a failure when you fail: Nope. You only become a failure when you give up. Show me a successful person and I’ll show you a failure. The only thing that seperates a success and a failure is that the latter gave up. You have to be persistent and consistent in whatever you do in order to grant yourself the honor of witnessing yourself as a success. Giving up is not an option. Once you decide on what you want to achieve don’t stop until you have achieved it.

12. There is always a higher bar: Your mother’s food is the sweetest food you’ve ever eaten until you eat someone else’s mother’s food. Even your father’s house will seem like the biggest house until you visit someone else’s house. When you achieve your goals, there will always be a higher goal to reach. Successful businessmen, masters and phd holders still attend seminars and take professional courses in a bid to widen their knowledge base and increase their potential to offer more to the world so nothing is stopping you from improving on yourself. Learn, try something new.

Read more, think more, talk less.

13. Everyone else has problems: No be only you get gbege. Everyone experiences life and are often facing one challenge or the other. Be emphatic.

You are also not responsible for changing the lives of other people either. Just as you have to bear the responsibility of your actions and figure out your life’s path, they also have the responsibility for theirs.

Do the best you can and allow them figure out the rest on their own. You don’t need to weigh yourself down with other people’s problems.

14. Not every reward is monetary: Work to learn, don’t work to earn. There are various forms of reward and they include experience, a smile on someone else’s face, life lesson, sense of fulfillment and acknowledgement of your own capabilities.

15. You will achieve your goals: Affirm that your goals are realistic, plan, be persistent and consistent and YOU WILL achieve your goals. It might take some time, stress, disappointment etc but YOU WILL achieve your goals.

14. START NOW! The best time to start was 20 years ago. The second best time is NOW. Start with what you have and you will get the rest of the requirements as you go on in your journey.

Who write am? Na me!

Source: http://nimini.com.ng/index.php/2015/10/31/487/