You all know what we do here. We 

I'm here to often bring you best of what we do here.

[size=5pt]Hail to Mod[/size]

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[center]Grandma 100 Years Birthday[/center]
The family wheeled Grandma out on the  lawn, in her wheelchair, where the activities for her 100th birthday were taking place. Grandma couldn't speak very well, but she could write notes when she needed to communicate.

After a short time out on the lawn, Grandma started leaning off to the right, so some family members grabbed her, straightened her up, and stuffed pillows on her right.

A short time later, she started leaning off to her left, so again the family grabbed her and stuffed pillows on her left. Soon she started leaning forward, so the family members again grabbed her, then tied a pillowcase around her waist to hold her up.

A nephew who arrived late came running up to Grandma and said, Hi Grandma, you're looking good! How are they treating you?

Grandma took out her little notepad and slowly wrote a note to the nephew, They won't let me fart. 

Lol. great joke

dani must be set for a copy and paste again

nice one

dani1luv:

Phemour. . Where are you now

Remember you promised that

Ok! Ooo 

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[center]School Group Photo[/center]
The children had all been photographed, and the teacher was trying to persuade them each to buy a copy of the group picture. Just think how nice it will be to look at it when you are all grown up and say, 'That's Jennifer; she's a lawyer,' or 'That's Michael, he's a doctor.'

A small voice at the back of the room rang out, And there's the teacher; , she's dead. lol 

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[center]Change of Underwear[/center]
The men of Charlie Company had been in the field for two weeks when the Sarge announces, I've got good news and bad news. First the good news. Today we're going to change our underwear.

The troops started cheering at the news.

Now the bad news. Smith, you change with Jones. Andrews, you change with Murphy,   

A man walks into a New York City bank and says he wants to borrow $2,000 for three weeks. The loan officer asks him what kind of collateral he has. The man says "I've got a Rolls Royce -- keep it until the loan is paid off -- here are the keys." The loan officer promptly has the car driven into the bank's underground parking for safe keeping, and gives the man $2,000.

Three weeks later the man comes into the bank, pays back the $2,000 loan, plus $10 interest, and regains possession of the Rolls Royce. The loan officer asks him, "Sir, if I may ask, why would a man who drives a Rolls Royce need to borrow two thousand dollars?"

The man answers, "I had to go to Europe for three weeks, and where else could I store a Rolls Royce for that long for ten dollars?"

A man came home from work one day and his wife asked
him to fix the toilet. The man says "who? do i look like the plumber?" and never fixed it,

The man comes home the next day and his wife asks him to fix the garbage disposal. The man says "who? do i look like a blad specialist?" and never fixed it,

The man comes home the next day and his wife asks him to fix the refrigerator. The man says "who? do i look like the Maytag repair man?" and never fixed it,

man comes home the next day and his wife told him she hired someone to fix the fridge, someone to fix the garbage disposal, and someone to fix the toilet. The man asks his wife "how much did it cost?" His wife says "i had to either bake them a cake or have sex with them." The man asks his wife "what kinda cake did you bake them?" the wife says "who do i look like Betty Crocker?"

Employer to Applicant:

Employer: "In this job we need someone who is responsible."

Applicant: "I'm the one you want. On my last job, every time anything went wrong, they said I was responsible." 

HilariiOus [b] dah last one especially !! [b]

Patient to Dentist:
Patient: "It must be tough spending all day with your hands in someone's mouth."
Dentist: "I just think of it as having my hands in their wallet."

kip it up femo

the guy dey try

and u luv doing bla bla bla wit grandm

and u luv doing bla bla bla wit grandm

I go smack you head

- - - - -

The boss came early in the morning one day and found an employee kissing his secretary.

He shouted at him, "Is this what I pay you for?"

The employee replied: "No, sir, this I do free of charge."

Two shoe salespeople were sent to Africa to open up new markets.

Three days after arriving, one salesperson called the office and said, "I'm returning on the next flight. Can't sell shoes here. Everybody goes barefoot."

At the same time the other salesperson sent an email to the factory, telling "The prospects are unlimited. Nobody wears shoes here!"  

nice jokes mahn! d grandma bit was hilarious

A guy was employed in a multi-national oil company, his first day in office, he has waited longer than ussual for his launch to be served. So he decided to call the canteen extension, but out of furiouxity he called the M.D's extention. Check out the following conversation.

Employee: Can you crazy guys serve me my launch?

M.D: You are crazy, do you know whom you are talking to?

Employee: No

M.D: this is the M.D

Employee: Do you know whom you are talking to?

M.D: No

Employee: o! thank God, and he quitely drop.

heard dis b4 still HILARIOUS lmao

does 'launch' get served? or did you mean 'lunch'??

na u sabi . . .madam sabinus

you dey find who u go trowey that ya name (wey ya paternal great grand papa) give you abi?

do me a favour, look away from me!

see wowo face of blisss

God took His time wiv me, Beutifully and wonderfully made!!

lol ics