Women are good with lies when it comes to securing
their relationship and past. Here are 10 mostly
harmless lies that every woman (and sometimes
man) seems to say before, during, and after sex.


1. “I don’t usually do this.”
Who do you think you are? R. Kelly? You do this all
the time and you like it, that’s why you’re doing it
right now and will continue doing it in the future.
Whether that “it” is involves something kinky with
candle wax and food or that certain special position
that can only be achieved by a step-stool, claiming
ignorance with sex won’t get you anywhere.

2. “I’m not that kind of person.”
Come on. What are people so afraid of letting their
freak flag fly? There’s nothing wrong with being the
kind of person who sleeps with someone on the first
date or the kind of person who doesn’t mind a little
backdoor action.

3. “I won’t tell anyone!”
What’s the first thing you’re going to do after you
finish with a mind-blowing sexual encounter in which
your whole body got rocked up and down like the
bridge of the Titanic? Tell your friends, put up a
cryptic Facebook status, and maybe even do a little
subtle somethin’ somethin’ on Instagram.
Commendable behaviour? No. Do we do it anyway.
Oh yes.

4. “You’re the best I’ve ever had.”
The best I’ve ever had since the last best time I ever
had and until the next best I’ll ever have.

5. “I’ll call you.”
No, you won’t – if anything, you’ll text them. Which
leads us to…
. “I’ll text you.”
No, you won’t. You’re not going to get a text from a
member of the generation that invented the act of
“ghosting. ” At most, you’ll get an Instagram like a few
months after the initial hook up and then maybe a
stray emoji a year or two later.

6. “I came.”
Sorry, buddy, but you probably did not give her an
orgasm – at least, not on your first try. But wasn’t it
nice of her to say?

7. “My roommates won’t mind”
If you hook up with someone with roommates, which
you probably will and probably have, it takes a huge
luck of the draw to end up with a girl whose roomie
is cool with hearing her housemate explicitly
knocking boots with some random dude she met on
some social media platform.


8. “I’m not sleeping with anyone else.”
Unless you’re in a full-fledged relationship with
someone else, it’s hard to believe you’re putting the
ancient belief of “going steady” into practice with
someone you only swiped right with two days ago.
Half the fun of random sex with multiple partners is
the “multiple partners” aspect.

9. “I always keep things tidy.”
Ha! One of the biggest misconceptions about men
and women is that women are the only ones who like
to tidy up down there when down there is expecting
company. Guys do it too, but we certainly don’t spend
an hour shaving and spritzing every single week. An
HD picture of any guy’s trash on an off-month will
spell a far different stories than the garbage coming
out of his mouth.

10. “That was so good.”
Yeesh, the caveat to this house of deceit. We’ve all
heard the “sex is like pizza” argument – what people
don’t talk about is the difference between how we talk
about good sex and bad sex. When the pizza is bad,
you tell the cook… when the sex is bad, you lie about
it and then avoid the person like a disgraced
cook who got the ingredients all wrong.

Hmmmm

And you think we care?? Lies or no lies, the weather is just too cold to loose them this period.