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Nairaland Forum / Entertainment / Literature / Poems For Review / When I Get Home (878 Views)
When I Leave This Town (poem) / When I Kneel To Prey. / I Love You More When I Miss You (2) (3) (4)
When I Get Home by Qaisar1: 5:20am On Jan 05, 2016 |
Yet again, another cold morning Stretched hard and managed yawning I was ready; for I've planned before today To leave the slums already; if I didn't fail Packed not bags Just a short and a rag They've been with me Even before I became dark Maybe I was selfish Wanted a life for my sisters and mummy But not here in the slums All they do is nothing but dirty and fetish It's two days I've been walking and swearing Couldn't pray? Yeah Couldn't find my faith nor bearings It is darker The night, voraciously feeding on its victims Was I mad? Was it hunger? Or maybe I wasn't thinking Should I retreat and forget 'The City'? Thoughts came through, on and into my mind But it couldn't be water nor food Soon I'll go empty and dry, then die... To or fro; either ways, 'twas mine to decide. So I pushed a little further Through lakes that conceived not waters Into caves which were rocky freezers Couldn't sleep - once sweet-dreams became bitter With quivering knees I went up there Colourful skies, shadowed City; Both, still not near Could have gone for it But my breath was leaving me Was not to blame death for helping me Then I found faith; I prayed A promise of blessings All for my family When I get home... ¤ Llaykorn donifez JigsawKillah Pdizzle Bolakale40 emaculate99 GidiQuotes Yuzjet 6 Likes 6 Shares
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Re: When I Get Home by emaculate99: 10:00am On Jan 05, 2016 |
colourful skies; shadowed city.... |
Re: When I Get Home by texanomaly(f): 1:33pm On Jan 05, 2016 |
I loved these lines especially. Is the bolded supposed to be knees? The night, voraciously feeding on its victims Through lakes that conceived not waters Into caves which were rocky freezers With quivering kneels I went up there Colourful skies, shadowed City; Both, still not near Could have gone for it But my breath was leaving me Was not to blame death for helping me Then I found faith; I prayed A promise of blessings All for my family 1 Like |
Re: When I Get Home by Qaisar1: 4:13pm On Jan 05, 2016 |
texanomaly: Oh! thanks ma'am ¤ 1 Like |
Re: When I Get Home by Pdizzle(m): 8:24pm On Jan 05, 2016 |
Family man. I like it |
Re: When I Get Home by donifez(m): 8:58pm On Jan 05, 2016 |
I like this...that before you became dark line is impressive. |
Re: When I Get Home by merit12(f): 9:01pm On Jan 05, 2016 |
Yet again, another cold morning Stretched hard and managed yawning I was ready; for I've planned before today To leave the slums already; if I didn't fail This writer was prepared to leave home and look for better life .he had prepared for the next day finally the day had arrived, the feeling or mood of the writter is happy because the long expected days came. Packed not bags Just a short and a rag They've been with me Even before I became dark He don't need much things just few things he own already short and rag [color=#990000]The last line hereI think you made mistake Even before it became dark as in night .[/color] Maybe I was selfish Wanted a life for my sisters and mummy But not here in the slums All they do is nothing but dirty and fetish He has hoped for good life for his family that's why he had to leave to get a better life for them. It's two days I've been walking and swearing Couldn't pray? Yeah Couldn't find my faith nor bearings [color=#000099]The journey has obviously began .the mood of the writer change here to being sad ...regret is quietly setting in ,he get to point he could not found his Faith to pray[/color]. It is darker The night, voraciously feeding on its victims Was I mad? Was it hunger? Or maybe I wasn't thinking Should I retreat and forget 'The City'? In this part uses personification, (the art of describing non living things ,object with living things features for example the night voraciously = eagerly or devour.the night can't feed it has no mouth or teeth)it a way of saying the night is waiting for him to die I think now he is thinking of retreat which is going back home swearing and pharphs no more food.one the is regret is there Thoughts came through, on and into my mind But it couldn't be water nor food Soon I'll go empty and dry, then die... To or fro; either ways, 'twas mine to decide. He thought of what he has left with him ,soon they become empty then he dies ..now he is thinking seriously to go home or still ahead So I pushed a little further Through lakes that conceived not waters Into caves which were rocky freezers Couldn't sleep - once sweet-dreams became bitter with the strenght he went ahead with hopes ,he found a place and rest in cave which he found but could not sleep there it was drawn on him all his plans to have a good life by going to the city had failed . That's also personification dream cannot taste anything .dreams have no tongue to taste With quivering knees I went up there Colourful skies, shadowed City; Both, still not near Could have gone for it But my breath was leaving me Was not to blame death for helping me Then I found faith; I prayed A promise of blessings All for my family When I get home He became cold ...he thought of the city he wanted to go though still not near him..he was dieing slowly is breath was leaving (once breath lives ones life it death .)he prayed .......he also thought proving for them or blessing them and making them happy once he get home (home there is not his real house were he left from he was indirectly saying when he get to hell ,heaven or dies finally .) I hope my explanation is correct according to understanding ......it same thing with our youth of these day going to lybia and crossing to Italy.going to Europe by foot .frist they wanted to make their family happy but during the journey death can also set in. It not all that leaves home get to their destination it only few that makes it. I like the poem and the lessons it teaches. 2 Likes |
Re: When I Get Home by Qaisar1: 6:34am On Jan 07, 2016 |
[quote author=merit12][/quote] Nice analysis. But, Packed not bags Just a short and a rag They've been with me Even before I became dark That's was not a mistake though. When babies are born, they are born mostly with light/fair skins; and when they grow older, they grow darker. He's trying to stress the fact that; * He has nothing else (his poor state) * These clothes were childhood gifts * The short and rag is as old as himself .................................................. So I pushed a little further Through lakes that conceived not waters Into caves which were rocky freezers Couldn't sleep - once sweet-dreams became bitter While still with his family, he must (at some point) be fantasizing on how "the City" would favour him. He had hopes - those were his sweet dreams. But when reality struck, his dreams which were then - sweet; wasn't anymore. Thanks |
Re: When I Get Home by merit12(f): 8:52am On Jan 07, 2016 |
Qaisar1: I hoped my explanation was correct to some extend? |
Re: When I Get Home by Qaisar1: 11:36am On Jan 07, 2016 |
merit12:Yeah Sure. |
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