Ever since I published this,I have been in constant communication with my mum. I never left her for a second. A man in his office saw this,am so very sure he read this on nairaland and he called me. He pleaded that I let this matter die and keep praying for my parents. Please how does one pray in a situation like this?Just last week,a woman was killed by her husband and it went viral on the net and I kept saying silently,"God,I reject this for my mum"....everyone is of the opinion that if she had left that abusive marriage,she would have been alive. Now,I don't even know what to do. The man who called was telling me that why is it now he will decide to kill her?why haven't he killed her since they were together 38/39 years?and I wondered,yes! He had the opportunity to do so when we we're younger. Oh I witnessed one kick he gave her,I was 8years or so,that kick sent my mum to heaven......it was on her chin. I remember crying that day but was helpless,no one came to help her and she didn't die. Maybe truly,there is something we don't know BUT what would make a woman stay with a man,one eyes closed everyday?This woman am saying is about to complete her own building.....Even when he heard she was building which she didn't tell him when she commenced said in front of us that the minute she steps there,its her dead body that will be brought out and my sis who just finished her youth service was stunned......she called me to tell me and I told her there's no love in that "marriage" anymore. My hands are tied. The very people telling me to do something to stop this once and for all are now backing out. My mum isn't making it easy to help her yet she runs to my house when the heat is ON. Its me she calls everyday crying on phone. Why don't u just leave there mummy?what are you doing there?a man disrespects you so much,dosent care for you,Beats you at 52,treats you like you have bo family......don't u see women living alone in other states?they ran!!! Mummy they ran..... What have I not said?yet in the end it looks like am trying to end her so called marriage with him. I just happen to love her so much to see her hurt but at this point,I need to now face my life. Thanks to all who are involved in this fight one way or the other,God bless you!

Teeshafoods my sister, I know you have tried your best for a mother you loved so much and God knows that you have tried to do what you were supposed to have done for her.

I cannot but pray that the man realize that he has to pay for his action if this woman dies in his hands. Physically and Psychologically, he has already killed her through his threats on her life. No matter what we do here on earth, we must one day answer for our action in the presence of our creator.

What I still would want to be done is for you to get back to same guy from your Dad's company who spoke with you guys and make sure you record his conversation as a witness for saying that you guys should drop taking action over your dad on this whole issue when threat to life is involved.

Ask him the action he has taken or discussions he had with your dad against his action that would want him to say that he cannot carry out his threat. Ask him his reasons for asking you people not to take action over your dad's threat.

Or write your Dad's company and deliver the letter to his company and the police over this whole issue. As I said earlier, why not report him to Femi Falana's office at GRA Ikeja. For me, you still need to cry over this to their office so that the man will sign an Undertaking over the life of the woman.

OK. Am driving now to pick my kids from school. Will be back soon to go through your comments again.

OK. I have read and understood your concern. I pray God won't make me guilty in the end. I still have those numbers shared here. I will resume calling and if possible go there to explain my plight. I pray this is settled once and for all so I can go treat my mum. Honestly,I now feel OK. Mum was in my house visiting and we resumed talks on the matter. Do we know she now bleeds without control even if its not her period. Like the woman with the issue of blood. She's been on it for 3 weeks now. She says when he starts his madness,she just feels blood dripping down her legs and it continues for a long time till he dosent talk to her again. Looks like am loosing this woman. I will do something. Looking at her,I wanted her to stay with me. I asked her why she's going back home and she says its not right for her to be with me in my husbands house and again what example is she showing us if she leaves that marriage is for better for worse that she knows the extent Dad can go and he's been on it for years so if he wanted to matchet her,he would have. My brain almost came out of my head.........anyways,I will add prayers,talks and action to the issue. I know one day,I know I will sing and song and tell a story with songs of praise.........

Teeshafoods:
OK. I have read and understood your concern. I pray God won't make me guilty in the end. I still have those numbers shared here. I will resume calling and if possible go there to explain my plight. I pray this is settled once and for all so I can go treat my mum. Honestly,I now feel OK. Mum was in my house visiting and we resumed talks on the matter. Do we know she now bleeds without control even if its not her period. Like the woman with the issue of blood. She's been on it for 3 weeks now. She says when he starts his madness,she just feels blood dripping down her legs and it continues for a long time till he dosent talk to her again. Looks like am loosing this woman. I will do something. Looking at her,I wanted her to stay with me. I asked her why she's going back home and she says its not right for her to be with me in my husbands house and again what example is she showing us if she leaves that marriage is for better for worse that she knows the extent Dad can go and he's been on it for years so if he wanted to matchet her,he would have. My brain almost came out of my head.........anyways,I will add prayers,talks and action to the issue. I know one day,I know I will sing and song and tell a story with songs of praise.........

Amennnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn. I am already putting you, your mum and family members in prayers. I feel your pain, I understand what it means to have a mother and to know what women pass through in bringing up children. Only a madman would wanna kill his wife.

Take her for medical check up as I know that her condition of the blood flow is as a result of the trauma of the abuse she is passing through, though I do not trust such a man as he could turn fetish and do some kind of bad things.

I hate men who abuse women and children and the society should stand and defend them. Our legal system is one of the worst and I pray that this is taken care of in our society.

andyanders:


Amennnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn. I am already putting you, your mum and family members in prayers. I feel your pain, I understand what it means to have a mother and to know what women pass through in bringing up children. Only a madman would wanna kill his wife.

Take her for medical check up as I know that her condition of the blood flow is as a result of the trauma of the abuse she is passing through, though I do not trust such a man as he could turn fetish and do some kind of bad things.

I hate men who abuse women and children and the society should stand and defend them. Our legal system is one of the worst and I pray that this is taken care of in our society.

Infact I am very grateful for the likes of you who has taken time to follow through this case. I wish I know who you are really. Issues arising daily but I thank God she's scaling through. I am to see her again today. Am going to pick my kids from school. I am going to her this evening. Will come back here if anything comes up but am sure something came up because she called me this morning that he disconnected her room light,removed the ceiling fan and disconnected the tap that runs water to her bathroom. All these signs are telling her to go. He has taken a few of her clothes and burnt it too. Well,that man in his office told he he has a mistress in their company and am sure that one is doing somethings.............oh my God,I don't even know whether to laugh or cry.

Teeshafoods:


Infact I am very grateful for the likes of you who has taken time to follow through this case. I wish I know who you are really. Issues arising daily but I thank God she's scaling through. I am to see her again today. Am going to pick my kids from school. I am going to her this evening. Will come back here if anything comes up but am sure something came up because she called me this morning that he disconnected her room light,removed the ceiling fan and disconnected the tap that runs water to her bathroom. All these signs are telling her to go. He has taken a few of her clothes and burnt it too. Well,that man in his office told he he has a mistress in their company and am sure that one is doing somethings.............oh my God,I don't even know whether to laugh or cry.

Oh My God. The man knew he had a mistress in his company and still would want your mother to hang in there? Something is not right here. The man is equally into what your dad is doing.

Now, why can't you guys arrange and get another place or rent a place for her to stay since she wouldn't want to disturb you guys?

Must she wanna die in the hands of this wicked man? Cannot understand why she still want to hang in with him. Tell her to get out or you stop picking her calls.Threaten her with those words to see if she can get out. Since he has disconnected those amenities, why must she still wanna stay?

What is his position with the company he works? Have you people submitted a written letter to that effect?

@Teeshafoods
Please get a doctor to see your mum. Don't talk to her about leaving your dad. Just tell her she needs to solve the blood issue. She'll be free to go back thereafter. By the time the doctors are through with her she'll be singing a different song. Make sure she's admitted so you have an opportunity to get social workers to see her. Get in touch with DSVRT- The Lagos State Domestic and Sexual Violence Response Team at Ikeja. I don't know the specific address unfortunately. Also raise the issue on Jimi Disu's blog. He's interested in helping people in her situation.

You can also try the psychiatric hospital at Oshodi. She's not mad but certainly psychologically devastated and terribly depressed.

I continue to pray for you and the family.

Andyanders, God bless you much more than you can imagine.

OK. Thank you anders. Yes he knows about the mistress. According to him,they have severally cautioned him and told him he's going the wrong path. Uhmmm....am not out to even hide any secrets here. They have been ON for a long time. The so-called woman came to my wedding. He invited her. She was also at my younger sis wedding too but we never knew until recently when talks came out. Remember I said neighbors called me to tell me things when I first cried out on this post. This and many more is one of the gist I heard. She came in company of her friends and when it was time for mum and dad to dance,she was really uncomfortable. People were pacifying her. Even one of my flower girls told me about it months after my wedding that didn't I see what's going on after I confided in her of what mum is going through. I told her how is it possible I know what's going on,its my wedding and over excited. She went as far as sharing stuffs. Infact people saw everything but we the family didn't know or suspect anything,we though everyone is a guest. When I and the man got talking,he told me he knew everything but how is it possible he told us or my mum when it looks as though the home is going well. The painful part of all theses is that,my dad was jobless for almost 6years,frustrated and drained,it was my mum who got the job for him in the company he currently works. We stood by him all through but now that he has money,he flirting with everything skirt. Can u see how deep this matter is?The day he was called for an interview,I was the one who borrowed money to get him a haircut,new clothes and shoes and even transport money. We transported him all through till he got his salary which of course he spent on us. But what's with molesting domestic staffs and telling them he will make their lives better if they date him?that he will rent a house for them?What's with molesting my own housemaid who I told to go stay with mum alongside my mum. The girl told me she took a bottle and threathened to break it on his head if he touches her again. Can u just imagine? What I detect from all of these is that the man in his office dosent support his activities. He says the women he's even making passes at are casual workers like cleaners,messengers who are less priviledged and he's using his position to lure them to bed. He's not even hiding it. A lady by name Rachael called my mum and explained activities at his work place that with it she dosent even greet him anymore. My mum knows many more of what am typing yet she's still there. I asked her yesterday evening what she's hiding and she said she's not hiding anything. My sis was there when I asked. And I told her I won't interfere anymore that am being blamed. She pleaded we stood by her but I made it clear I can't help her if she remains silent and dosent leave there. As for getting her a place,I wish I can,I am just not financially bouyant at this point and hubby is paying off debts monthly so my bsiness is what's sustaining us for now. I wish I have the means,am sure she will go. We talked on it,she said she's not go enough to rent a house that she's now willing to go so we are stuck now. Sir, how long will I have this bad feeling for my dad even after mum is out of there?I feel HATE and disgust!!!! Am embarrassed!

Thanks dear, we intend to do all that for her. She needs medical help. The best I did was to get her RUZU herbal bitters which made her sleep well but he still forcefully opens her door at night and even with sleepy eyes,she's made to sleep outside in the midst of mosquitoes. I remember I used to protect my mum so much before I got married. I had fought with my dad before that he took a lamp and hit on my head,I bled seriously on my head and mum was crying. I was rushed to the hospital and the following day,I went with my mum to make a report. What did the police say?that how will I lift my hands to fight my own father?I was so insulted,I felt bad. He has always been saying it that he's waiting for us all to get married then he will show my mum who he is. He has hammered so much on the suckaway at the back of our house. He has taken my sis to show her the place and that he's waiting for us all to go first. For a man to boast openly that the law can't do him anything....he seems so sure he's doing the right thing. I know my mum's brain has been shrinked...I know and it pains me so much but I wish I can help so she comes to live with me for a while till we can get her a place. You see,am always remembering this as I type,this experience has been ON since we were younger.....as young as 6years of age. All of my siblings have something to say. When we gather to talk,we all burst into tears. We have seen mum in blood many times. We don't concentrate in class cos we want to run home to see if dad is beating mum. Its not that he beats her when she does something,no,he just beats her. He finds excitement in it. He will gather us and sit us down telling us to watch and he will beat her in our presence but what can we do,we were so young and can't hold him. Truly,she would have died a long time ago but God kept her for a reason. Am crying now....I can't contain this. Someone help me drag her out. Its not a problem going to that address being given,we need an excort who will make them attend to us. All I want is for military men to go there with an order that she packs her stuffs and he mustnt touch her while doing that. That's all!!!!!....he had locked her out MANY times and if people say he should at least take a wrapper,he dosent agree.....he dosent....see my family?pls.....I will go there but my mind tells me this stories are too long to take immediate action. Let me catch some sleep pls.

delpee:
Andyanders, God bless you much more than you can imagine.

And may God Almighty bless you and yours immensely. We all need each other because we are brothers and sisters. Each and everyone of us came to this world through a woman hence we cannot/should not neglect any woman because they are our mothers.

Some men tend to be acting as if they were not brought to this world through a woman hence they act like animals.

No matter how a woman got you provoked, take a walk and know that they are the weaker sex. Some men look at women as if they are not supposed to be while not knowing that same woman you look down on, can decide to kill you without any form of any trace linking her.

This part of the world, women tend to be looked down on and treated like animal. Therefore, this is the time to fight for their right. The abuse of women these days is getting out of hand. Our legal system is not working as corruption has taken over their practice.

You see a father molesting his female child and nothing is been doing to put away such men away from the society.I am advocating for a life sentence for pedophiles and rapists in this country.Most women are going through pain in their respective homes and they are not speaking out. People should encourage them to speak out because the end result of their silence is the deaths we are having now.

andyanders:



And may God Almighty bless you and yours immensely. We all need each other because we are brothers and sisters. Each and everyone of us came to this world through a woman hence we cannot/should not neglect any woman because they are our mothers.

Some men tend to be acting as if they were not brought to this world through a woman hence they act like animals.

No matter how a woman got you provoked, take a walk and know that they are the weaker sex. Some men look at women as if they are not supposed to be while not knowing that same woman you look down on, can decide to kill you without any form of any trace linking her.

This part of the world, women tend to be looked down on and treated like animal. Therefore, this is the time to fight for their right. The abuse of women these days is getting out of hand. Our legal system is not working as corruption has taken over their practice.

You see a father molesting his female child and nothing is been doing to put away such men away from the society.I am advocating for a life sentence for pedophiles and rapists in this country.Most women are going through pain in their respective homes and they are not speaking out. People should encourage them to speak out because the end result of their silence is the deaths we are having now.

Uhmmm insightful. He's been calm sir......I confirmed from sources. All his raging like an animal has reduced in the last 24hrs....people who I never imagined has viewed this post. Some sense is entering him now. I know it won't last though.......we have started work on getting him already. I was at Femi falanas office today and mum is going with me tomorrow. Making progress! Will keep you all informed.

Teeshafoods:


Uhmmm insightful. He's been calm sir......I confirmed from sources. All his raging like an animal has reduced in the last 24hrs....people who I never imagined has viewed this post. Some sense is entering him now. I know it won't last though.......we have started work on getting him already. I was at Femi falanas office today and mum is going with me tomorrow. Making progress! Will keep you all informed.

Good to hear that. I am soooooooooooooooooooooo glad that you went there to table this issue. The promise I have for you is that you will not mourn your mum through accidental death/violence, rather when her God wants her back.

Having experienced what your mother must have passed through, it will help you understand life better. Never allow anybody take advantage of you in life. Cry out for help because this is a global world an things has changed. You must be ready to tell the world what you are passing through in your marital life when an abuse starts. Never say 'he will change'

Follow this up to see that this man must come to his senses and understand that you guys are no more those little children of yesterday he use to abuse. Teach him a lesson. Make sure that your mother is kept off from him because his type is those that would wanna commit murder when boxed to the wall. When these steps are been taken, your mother for her own interest should stay off from him.He is never EVER a father.

Let us know how far later. May God protect you and yours.

You can still try to contact Human Rights Crusader Joe Odumakin on this issue and as a woman, she will have this issue taken up and even aired. Never give up 'Teeshafoods'

andyanders:
You can still try to contact Human Rights Crusader Joe Odumakin on this issue and as a woman, she will have this issue taken up and even aired. Never give up 'Teeshafoods'

God bless you real good. We were there today. I was interviewed seperately though. Mum was with another woman while I was in another room with another woman. I was asked series of questions and asked to provide a recording either video/audio as evidence. We are still on it though. Details later. Am a bit relieved........

Teeshafoods:


God bless you real good. We were there today. I was interviewed seperately though. Mum was with another woman while I was in another room with another woman. I was asked series of questions and asked to provide a recording either video/audio as evidence. We are still on it though. Details later. Am a bit relieved........

Glad to hear that. Tell your mum to speak out and say the truth because her life is at stake. Anybody that is after her life must die for her to be alive.

A man born by another woman cannot take your mother's life. As far as they are not legally married and even they are, he has no right over her life.

Make sure that this man is brought back to his senses and that any steps to take the life of this woman, his own life MUST be taken away too in same manner.

Let him understand now that she has people and that people she got is us, the public. He figured he can eat his cake and have it. That time is gone. We are in another generation.

A woman MUST be respected and not to be abused. Maybe, his father abused his mother, that was her mother and not this woman.

andyanders:


Glad to hear that. Tell your mum to speak out and say the truth because her life is at stake. Anybody that is after her life must die for her to be alive.

A man born by another woman cannot take your mother's life. As far as they are not legally married and even they are, he has no right over her life.

Make sure that this man is brought back to his senses and that any steps to take the life of this woman, his own life MUST be taken away too in same manner.

Let him understand now that she has people and that people she got is us, the public. He figured he can eat his cake and have it. That time is gone. We are in another generation.

A woman MUST be respected and not to be abused. Maybe, his father abused his mother, that was her mother and not this woman.

Uhmmm thanks so much anders.......words can't express how grateful I am. She's actually speaking. I don't know what she said and she didn't tell me but am sure she answered correctly.

Teeshafoods:



Uhmmm thanks so much anders.......words can't express how grateful I am. She's actually speaking. I don't know what she said and she didn't tell me but am sure she answered correctly.

Let her tell you what she told them. Understand that this is now a legal matter so that your statements don't differ.

Let her open up and tell the world what she has been passing through. Relationship is not a Do or Die affair. If it is not working out, go your separate ways. Keep us updated.

Teeshafoods how's yr mum's health? The lord restores peace to yr family.

andyanders:



Let her tell you what she told them. Understand that this is now a legal matter so that your statements don't differ.

Let her open up and tell the world what she has been passing through. Relationship is not a Do or Die affair. If it is not working out, go your separate ways. Keep us updated.

Yes she has told me. Sorrry for the late response. A letter has been written to his office already but I can't say if he has been summoned yet. Mum told me he has been calm anyway. I will update you all soon.

doveJfj:
Teeshafoods
how's yr mum's health?
The lord restores peace to yr family.

She's OK sir. Thank u so much. Amen and amen!

All will be well by God's grace. Somehow I still wish she could leave his house even if for a while so she can have the chance to really appraise her life and see if she feels good staying with him.

Well done Teeshafoods!

Wonderful unrelenting support Andyanders. God bless you.

Teeshafoods:


Yes she has told me. Sorrry for the late response. A letter has been written to his office already but I can't say if he has been summoned yet. Mum told me he has been calm anyway. I will update you all soon.

Good to hear from you and the steps taken over this disturbing issue that has to do with life. I have been checking for your update over this knowing too that you should be busy with your domestic responsibility and this subject matter. God will strengthen you and yours to overcome this devil.

I am glad to note that an letter has been sent to his office and you guys awaiting for the outcome. Never give up because the battle must be won.

As our sister 'doveJfj' here suggested, I will suggest as I earlier indicated in one of the advises I have given you herein, let your mum stay off and observe things from distance.

You cannot predict people like the man that fathered you guys. Silence could mean something else to their likes. Let your mum get out for now if possible. Most of their type can decide to commit multiple murder and too commit suicide at the end.

I have taken much lessons on people like him. I pray that God take away many things from his mind.

Remain blessed until we hear from you.

delpee:
All will be well by God's grace. Somehow I still wish she could leave his house even if for a while so she can have the chance to really appraise her life and see if she feels good staying with him.

Well done Teeshafoods!

Wonderful unrelenting support Andyanders. God bless you.

Thank you my sister for your advise and concern for this wonderful family is appreciated.Thank you too for your prayers and may The Almighty God bless you and your family.

We all need each other to be alive. We cannot afford to keep mute and allow a sister weep over her dear mother. Women are weaker s3x and should be respected. A woman should be a part of a man and should be cherished. A man who would wanna kill his wife must either be under the influence of drug or mentally sick. God who said that a man should not stay alone, knew the importance of a woman to a man and men who tend to see women as an object for destruction must be sick. Without a woman =, you cannot have offspring. Why kill them I ask? Marriage is not a do or die affair and if it is not working out, this woman should get out from the man.

I just stumbled across this thread and I'm so sad; your mum has been suffering abuse for such a long time @op, too long. I just really hope all your efforts at getting justice for her works out.

delpee:
All will be well by God's grace. Somehow I still wish she could leave his house even if for a while so she can have the chance to really appraise her life and see if she feels good staying with him.

Well done Teeshafoods!

Wonderful unrelenting support Andyanders. God bless you.

Thank you my sister. Your advise and concern for this wonderful family is appreciated.We all need each other to be alive. We cannot afford to keep mute and allow a sister weep over her dear mother. Women are weaker s3x and should be respected. A woman should be a part of a man and should be cherished. A man who would wanna kill his wife must either be under the influence of drug or mentally sick. God who said that a man should not stay alone, knew the importance of a woman to a man and men who tend to see women as an object for destruction must be sick. Without a woman =, you cannot have offspring. Why kill them I ask? Marriage is not a do or die affair and if it is not working out, this woman should get out from the man.

Teeshafoods

What is the situation now?I hope your mum is ok? Need to hear from you on the situation report.

andyanders:
Teeshafoods

What is the situation now?I hope your mum is ok? Need to hear from you on the situation report.

Yes my mum is OK. I believe the letter has also gotten to my dad. We are trying to raise money for her to leave. She was also advised to stay off for a while. He comfronted her last night and according to her,he says if she likes she should go to the president of Nigeria,he will make sure she dies. She seem to be laughing it off based on the fact that we have reported and they have given her hope but am scared he will kill her and kill himself too cos he's not scared. OK,he called my sis yesterday to ask how she was doing....he's trying to find out which of his kids is behind this because to him,mummy wouldn't have known how to free herself with the law. I sense he's a bit scared but dosent want to show it. This is the most recent happening. He says he will go ahead and do what he will and we on our part are trying to get her out. He hasn't touched her,just threat. Like I have been saying,I won't wait for the worst to happen before acting. His friends are pleading to let the matter die that they are talking to him. Not friends per say but colleagues. So this is it sir. Am raising something. Am 8months pregnant so its not that easy for me jumping up and down but am trying my best to see that she's out soonest as advised. Love u all

southernbelle:
I just stumbled across this thread and I'm so sad; your mum has been suffering abuse for such a long time @op, too long. I just really hope all your efforts at getting justice for her works out.

Amen dear. God bless you real good.

Teeshafoods:


Yes my mum is OK. I believe the letter has also gotten to my dad. We are trying to raise money for her to leave. She was also advised to stay off for a while. He comfronted her last night and according to her,he says if she likes she should go to the president of Nigeria,he will make sure she dies. She seem to be laughing it off based on the fact that we have reported and they have given her hope but am scared he will kill her and kill himself too cos he's not scared. OK,he called my sis yesterday to ask how she was doing....he's trying to find out which of his kids is behind this because to him,mummy wouldn't have known how to free herself with the law. I sense he's a bit scared but dosent want to show it. This is the most recent happening. He says he will go ahead and do what he will and we on our part are trying to get her out. He hasn't touched her,just threat. Like I have been saying,I won't wait for the worst to happen before acting. His friends are pleading to let the matter die that they are talking to him. Not friends per say but colleagues. So this is it sir. Am raising something. Am 8months pregnant so its not that easy for me jumping up and down but am trying my best to see that she's out soonest as advised. Love u all

Waoooooooooo great news, God will protect you, your unborn child and that child will be a blessing to you and his generation.You will ONLY know delivery room and not labor room and shall put to bed like a Hebrew woman. God is with you as He knows the importance of this struggle and your condition. He is involved. Worry not and look up to Him and always ask for His intervention.

To the subject matter, you guys should try as much as possible to get her out and please do not be annoyed, I hope your husband is aware and his input also matters?

Any hand he lays on her from now on, record it as evidence. He should be invited by the office that sent letter to his company. He should be asked to sign an Undertaking over this issue.

Good news,congratulations Teeshafoods
the lord grant you strength.
pleaseeeee,d earlier d better,your mum should leave even if it is a relative's place.The man being gentle is very dangerous and he's still saying that kind of thing.you don't know his next action. e o ni foju suku mummy yin