We dated for 9yrs and i bowed to pressure frm my parents 2 marry her cos i was getting close to 30yrs, immediately afta da wedding bubble burst ed , she insulted ma mom who has been her advocate 4 all dis yrs and told my dad 2 go 2 blazes, my siblings wer locked out on my occasions frm my house,if am out of da country.she was a devils incarnate, she hits me wiv all sorts of weapons,,,,,pestle,high heel shoes ,sticks and bite my ear 1day, bt since i wasnt brought up in a violent way i let it pass, bt afta 4mths of dis crazy behavior, i even bought her a state of d art car 2 please her ,d only statement dat came out of her mouth is she doent like d color,i felt like killing myself.dis happens 2b 1 of d minutest things i did 4 her, wen all went terribly sour, , i had 2 kick her out, wat surprised me most was dat her parents took her back wit all pleasure and insulted d living day out of me wen i was invited 2 der hse, well bye gone is bye gone
my lyf has been so miserable since then, hbp everynow and then, i hate women wiv a passion, only God can judge me,

4got to say she is 7mths pregnant 4mi, am very sure she wanna give da kid a vry wrong start and bad future, am so sick

They usually say 'some people have heads but no caps and some people have caps but no heads' ( Eni to lori o ni fila).

@ Poster I am so sorry, i don't even know how to advice you

hmmmmmmmm

wow

IM SO SORRI FOR YOUR TROUBLES LESS NOT FORGET U ARE MAN OF HOUSE
IM U.S CITIZEN WHO IS MARRIED TO NIGERIAN MAN AND WE BOTH TREAT EACHOTHER
AS EQUALS BUT SOMETIME A MAN NEED STO STEP UP AND PUT ON HIS BIG BOY PANTS
YOUR WILL BE FATHER TO THIS CHILD TAKE LEAD YOU CAN DO IT I KNOW AS NIGERIAN
YOU ARE VERY LOVING BUT MAN MUST BE MAN PUT HER IN HER PLACE WHERE I COME FROM NO ONE EVER SPEAKS TO ONES MOTHER WITH DISRESPECT. NEVER TOLERATE
THAT I HOPE THIS HELPS DO WHAT YOU MUST TAKE CHARGE YOU CAN DO IT

This story seems to have too many holes.
A woman yabbed your mama and your papa, beat you up and lock your family out of the house.
You now compensate her with a state of the Art kinda car?
You try, next time you wanna give us story, think well.

@ fhemmy, i was brought up in a very decent home and have a good upbringing,even has a friend u offend me i would take no offence against you.
will still greet you 2mrw and love you still, i gave all i had 2 make dis marriage wrk but love dnt love me, u wan make i kill myself
2 appease d devil kip pouring palm oil on his head, dats simply wat i did my friend.
i nid nt lie cos i dnt nid ur sympathy, am only concerned abt my child, dnt want him 2 suffer

dewoy:

@ fhemmy, i was brought up in a very decent home and have a good upbringing,even has a friend u offend me i would take no offence against you.
will still greet you 2mrw and love you still, i gave all i had 2 make dis marriage wrk but love dnt love me, u wan make i kill myself
2 appease d devil kip pouring palm oil on his head, dats simply wat i did my friend.
i nid nt lie cos i dnt nid your sympathy, am only concerned abt my child, dnt want him 2 suffer

Decent upbringing has nothing to do with rewarding evil deeds.
If you read thru all i said, i never said, beat her up.
But to now buy her a "state of the art" ride for messing with your life? I am sorry, i question what is the meaning of decent upbringing then.

Fhemmmy:

This story seems to have too many holes.
A woman yabbed your mama and your papa, beat you up and lock your family out of the house.
You now compensate her with a state of the Art kinda car?
You try, next time you wanna give us story, think well.

For once I disagree with you Fhemmy, he dey happen o!!
Some men just want to make peace in the home, they try and forget the past and get the woman to change but such possessed women do everything to frustrate the man.
A close uncle of mine (mum's bro) had the same experience, even worse!!his wife's family even had to conclude that she was under  demonic attack. Imagine burning your husband's clothes and smashing his phone?? . We later found out after DNA that their only child wasn't my uncle's. Na she talk am when they were fighting o, my uncle now had to do a DNA to prove it. Anyone who lives in Abeokuta would know this story. Through it all, my uncle was still being a good husband, he landed in hospital once from a terrible bite from her. The last straw for him was when he found out about the child, that's when he opened up to us.
Just pray that God should give you your own wife, things they happen for this life o!!

am vry sure u aint married, 4 better 4 worse, she is my wife nt my housemaid , 4 crying out loud
,

aysometin:

For once I disagree with you Fhemmy, he dey happen o!!
Some men just want to make peace in the home, they try and forget the past and get the woman to change but such possessed women do everything to frustrate the man.
A close uncle of mine (mum's bro) had the same experience, even worse!!his wife's family even had to conclude that she was under  demonic attack. Imagine burning your husband's clothes and smashing his phone?? i was there life n direct. We later found out after DNA that their only child wasn't my uncle's. Na she talk am when they were fighting o, my uncle now had to do a DNA to prove it. Anyone who lives in Abeokuta would know this story.

My dear Sis, i am not saying it is not possible.
If all the atrocities were done to the man and the man alone, i can understand.
The woman in question, yab the mother of the guy, tell the father to go to blazes, locked out his sibblings and all that.
Beat the man with "iso" pencil shoes, locked him out of his own house.
now go and bought 'state of the art" ride for her?
Plsssssssssssssssssss, someone pinch me, cos i must be sleeping.

dewoy:

am vry sure u aint married, 4 better 4 worse, she is my wife nt my housemaid , 4 crying out loud
,

For better for worse.
Not for beating and for yabbies, for yabbing my mother and yabbing my father and locking me out.
First of all, your family were the reason you married her, based on what you said, cos your mother has always been her advocate.
You surrender to their pressure cos you are hitting 30 years of age, according to what you said.
immediately after the bubble of wedding burst, which i am sure, might be just some months afterwards, you are so madly in love that you close ur eyes to even wrong stuff?

Fhemmmy:

My dear Sis, i am not saying it is not possible.
If all the atrocities were done to the man and the man alone, i can understand.
The woman in question, yab the mother of the guy, tell the father to go to blazes, locked out his sibblings and all that.
Beat the man with "iso" pencil shoes, locked him out of his own house.
now go and bought 'state of the art" ride for her?
Plsssssssssssssssssss, someone pinch me, cos i must be sleeping.

I understand you but I am still saying it does happen.
If you don't know, most uncultured ladies tend to insult their husband's family during a fight.
My uncle had a dose of that from his wife, he later told us how she used to curse and insult all of us including my grandparents up to my uncles and family members in general. She was rude to my Grandma and Mum to their faces on so many occasions, but they let it pas to save the home.
Any forgiving person would just forget after a while.
Fhemmy it just shows you are different from this guy!!that's life

aysometin:

I understand you but I am still saying it does happen.
If you don't know, most uncultured ladies tend to insult their husband's family during a fight.
My uncle had a dose of that from his wife, he later told us how she used to curse and insult all of us including my grandparents up to my uncles and family members in general. She was rude to my Grandma and Mum to their faces on so many occasions, but they let it pas to save the home.
Any forgiving person would just forget after a while.
Fhemmy it just shows you are different from this guy!!that's life

After a while and that is the key point, but this dude wasn't after a while now.
haba.
Did ur uncle took the wife shopping immediately she was done using the family as toothpick?
i am not saying dont forgive, but to now buy a "state of the art" car for same woman? plssssssssssssssssssssss
OK, fine, he forgave and all, why making noise about it now, how come this dude is now calling same woman a "devil incarnate" now?

@ Fhemmy

I get your point!!

aysometin:

@ Fhemmy

I get your point!!

Good

nawa oooooooooo,i never said immediately afta wat she did i bought her a car oooooo.stop mis quoting me
i meant afta all her trouble i bought her a car nt immediately ooooooo.
femi nawa o , i happen 2b femi also , any aw sha , av moved on dats d most important

There are always two sides to a story and your story basically just said everything bad about her and everything good about you. We have heard these stories over and over again and even had a case that the wife came on here to defend herself (LOL I am not kidding either) but I feel your pain and almost feel heart broken for you. Do not neglect your child no matter how crazy the mother is. That child can only have one father and she will marry again and have other children

Are you a Nigerian?

ofcourse she has alot 2 say 2, bt i av never treated her badly or cheated on her,



yeah a nigerian

Fhemmy, I have seen similar o.
These things happen sometimes. It's worse when the guy has a good heart.

I saw a supposedly absolutely spiritually wonderful lady turn into a monster within a few years.
The husband was someone who just decided that he wanted to calm down and have a good home. In the process, he allowed his wife to assume the position of a monster in the home. Their family is now a miserable one as neither wants to divorce but the man is hoping the woman will come to her sense and apologise. They have a child and the son, a teenager, is also feeling the tension often in the firing line for his closeness to his mum.

Dont dismiss some of these stories so easily. The guy may have spiced it up tho.

JustGood:

Fhemmy, I have seen similar o.
These things happen sometimes. It's worse when the guy has a good heart. I saw a supposedly absolutely spiritually wonderful lady turn into a monster within a few years.
The husband was someone who just decided that he wanted to calm down and have a good home. In the process, he allowed his wife to assume the position of a monster in the home. Their family is now a miserable one as neither wants to divorce but the man is hoping the woman will come to her sense and apologise. They have a child and the son, a teenager, is also feeling the tension often in the firing line for his closeness to his mum.

Dont dismiss some of these stories so easily. The guy may have spiced it up tho.

word!!

JustGood:

Fhemmy, I have seen similar o.
These things happen sometimes. It's worse when the guy has a good heart.

I saw a supposedly absolutely spiritually wonderful lady turn into a monster within a few years.
The husband was someone who just decided that he wanted to calm down and have a good home. In the process, he allowed his wife to assume the position of a monster in the home. Their family is now a miserable one as neither wants to divorce but the man is hoping the woman will come to her sense and apologise. They have a child and the son, a teenager, is also feeling the tension often in the firing line for his closeness to his mum.

Dont dismiss some of these stories so easily. The guy may have spiced it up tho.

I am not disbelieving what the dude is saying and i am not saying it is not possible, just that some gray areas sounds too good to be true, and he seems to be getting it and has cleared some stuff.
Like when he said, he bought him "state of the art" car, and i wonder, was that to compensate her for a good job done on yabbing the mother and telling the father to go to blazes?
When he said, the mother was all along the advocate for the lady all along, he made it sounds like he wouldnt have married the babe, if not cos of the mother, and now that the babe dont yab the mother, he don buy her a ride.
The dude just came and point the woman so bad, he chose a topic as bad as "devil incarnate" and yet bought her a ride?
These are some of the things that flags it for me.
But like he said, his name is Femi and i know Femi are always with good heart, and that is why i am Fhemmmy, cos my own heart is the sweetest with limitation sha.

na wa ooo.

,mama-gee:

na wa ooo.

Na real wa my sister. I don hia am finish for NL.

or maybe a toyota camry 07 is not a state of the earth car then oooooooooooooo

like dis very popular Ebenezer obeys song
no amount of wisdom you use,no matter aw good your character is, you cant satisfy the entire world.
well it happened in lagos nigeria.
my lawyer has a detailed event of things as sn the divorce proceedings goes thru, ya all gonna av a copy.
cheers

Femi, the dynamics of marriage are very different to girlfriend & boyfriend relationship.

In a marriage you disagree, throw your toys out of the pram in a tantrum and then, you yourself calmly put them all back in the pram again, make up and get on with the marriage

In a boyfriend/girlfriend relationship, you disagree and walk away . . . . . end of.

Dewoy did not buy the car as a “well done for insulting my parents” the car was just a way of trying to make her happy and to keep his home intact; He knows that this is for better for worse and he was only trying to get through to his wife.

I don’t believe that woman turn nasty the moment the ring is on the finger, so most probably the poster missed the warning signs before he got married or since he got married he has done something untoward to this woman.

Women usually change when they catch or suspect a cheating husband.

There are 2 sides to every story and for the wives parents to insult him when he went to see them shows that there is another story going round their side of the family. When a couple are in discord you will find that usually both husband and wife are to blame.

My advice to him is to sit down and carefully think about what he wants to do. Is he prepared to accept his wife back even if she doesn’t change (because there is no guarantee that she will) or can he take it no more and wants to call it a day.

Certainly as there is violence involved and with a new baby coming he might want to think carefully about the implications of these 2 issues.

Wishing you good luck and I hope it all gets sorted o




true talk check your self it takes two to tangle

chaircover:

Femi, the dynamics of marriage are very different to girlfriend & boyfriend relationship.

In a marriage you disagree, throw your toys out of the pram in a tantrum and then, you yourself calmly put them all back in the pram again, make up and get on with the marriage

In a boyfriend/girlfriend relationship, you disagree and walk away  . . . . . end of.

Dewoy did not buy the car as a “well done for insulting my parents” the car was just a way of trying to make her happy and to keep his home intact; He knows that this is for better for worse and he was only trying to get through to his wife.

I don’t believe that woman turn nasty the moment the ring is on the finger, so most probably the poster missed the warning signs before he got married or since he got married he has done something untoward to this woman.

Women usually change when they catch or suspect a cheating husband.

There are 2 sides to every story and for the wives parents to insult him when he went to see them shows that there is another story going round their side of the family. When a couple are in discord you will find that usually both husband and wife are to blame.

My advice to him is to sit down and carefully think about what he wants to do. Is he prepared to accept his wife back even if she doesn’t change (because there is no guarantee that she will) or can he take it no more and wants to call it a day.

Certainly as there is violence involved and with a new baby coming he might want to think carefully about the implications of these 2 issues.

Wishing you good luck and I hope it all gets sorted out.

You see why i have so much respect for you.
You be real chaircover jare.
that is all i want the guy to come and say.
Like i said, he came online and give his wife such a name "devil incarnate" ? and yet he is trying to tell us what he has done, and how the woman has done this and that, and i am so sure, no woman in her right mind, mind my adjective sha "woman in her right mind" would do such.
Something must have been wrong somewhere, and instead of him enjoying the "pity party", he needs to find out what was wrong.

here is my take.
A man that just wanna use a gift to dust something underneath the carpet is wrong.
he shd have found out why the woman that loved her family so much all of a sudden just changed.
here are some scenerio that could make a woman do that.

the woman could have heard that the family is indulging in knowing that the husband has a girlfriend.

there cant be a smoke without a fire.
Now if the woman is just extremely wicked and pretends before they get married, then, the marriage shd be null, cos during the marriage ceremonies, the pastor or Priest at Mosque, would ask, if anyone including couple getting married knows anything why they shd not be married, they shd say it, else the marriage is not blessed, and the woman knows that she is a pretender, then, the marriage is just another script acting.

am rily feeling you guys, der is always 2 sides 2 a story i agree with you.am nt a saint neither a devil, my wife is very materialistic and very destructive and doesnt have d fear of God atall, i had 2 cancelled our honeymoon trip 2 dubai becos she termed d place a cheap country 4 every tom ,dick and harry, we had 2 go 2 Hawaii am sure u knw aw much its cost 2 go der.,she shopped till she was tired, wen we got 2 Nigeria she told me she aint gonna drive her maxima 01 anymore,i refused b4 i came frm wrk on a very lovely monday evenin i was shocked ,,,she burnt all our wedding pics and told me she was goin 2 burn d cd also afta a mth if i dnt concur, i had 2 report this her parents all they told me was 2b patient,,,even afta showing them all d scars on my body, they didnt even scold her, out of frustratn i had 2 tell my parents,,,,they called her she refused only 4 them 2 come and she started raining insults and abuses on der head, i had 2 plead wit ma parents 2 leave cos my mom was weeping, i didnt have a choice than 2 get d car , soon aftaward she came with a list dat she was gonna buy baby things worth 3.5 million in the Uk {she doesnt work ooo,cos she said she will never wrk in her lyf, this is a degree holder oo}, am always tormented wit her curses and violent ways, she even tore my shirt on 1 occassion on my way 2 wrk its way my kid broda dat save my lyf , she wanted to stab me wit a scissors , i cant mention enuf its just 2 guud to be tru, am a very shy person and also an introvert, so i keep things 2ma self most times, bt dis is 2 much cross 4mi 2 carry, i may nt be abvle 2 express myself much, bt am sure God undastands i av a good heart,
the only reason am here, is 4 advice on my kid on d way, am just confused abt it,,,

Poster you say that you are not the devil and that your wife was materialistic and no fear of God. But sweetie, didn't you know all this before you married her? How long have you all dated before you were married?

IM readin your story wondering why the hell you married her? Shes crazy.