Asalam alaykum waramotullah. A question for all: Is it ideal or advisable to marry someone who isnt as religiously committed as u are.
Say for instance, a muslim lady who is striving to bcm more pious and trying to adhere to d basic principles of quran and sunnah now marries a rational muslim guy who hardly knows anything outside the 5pillars of islam. Thanks for ur swift response.
Cc: Lexiconkabir
Empiree
Contact17
Kazrem

Can spot lexiconkabir viewing

Will wait for his response

sherryshitt:
Asalam alaykum waramotullah. A question for all: Is it ideal or advisable to marry someone who isnt as religiously committed as u are.
Say for instance, a muslim lady who is striving to bcm more pious and trying to adhere to d basic principles of quran and sunnah now marries a rational muslim guy who hardly knows anything outside the 5pillars of islam. Thanks for ur swift response.
Cc: Lexiconkabir
Empiree
Contact17
Kazrem

If she is pious enough to draw the husband more closer to Allah (SWT). Then it's a welcome development and she will get reward for the Jihad.

But according to your post, she is not yet pious. She is only striving to become pious. I strongly believe that the husband might make her less pious as she was before marriage. Except if her piousness can make the Husband more religious, then I advocate such marriage.

Basically it defends on the wife's ability to be steadfast.

I know nothing but He the knower of Knowledge Knows.

If the person you are about to marry is serious about his religion, prays regularly and avoids haraam things, then he is a righteous person and you should marry him, take care of him, and help him to perfect his righteousness.

The fact that he falls short in seeking knowledge, or he has not reached the ideal level that the wife-to-be is dreaming of is not a reason. There is man but someone else is better than him and more perfect than him, because there is no limit to perfection.

What you are seeking of life filled with faith, righteous deeds and virtues, you can obtain by striving hard and seeking the means that will help you to attain that, such as finding righteous friends, attending lectures and seminars, taking part in Qur’an memorisation circles and da‘wah programs, listening to beneficial lessons, and so on.

How many women there are who are knowledgeable, have memorized Qur’an and call people to Allaah, whilst their husbands are ordinary, righteous, regular Muslims? In order for you to attain these high levels it is not essential that the man you wish to marey join you in that. You do not know, perhaps if you focus on attaining these things that will help your husband(if you eventually marry) and encourage him to join you in that. The intelligent, wise woman can change many of her husband’s habits and interests; what matters is that she is trying to fulfil her duties towards him, treats him kindly and does not cause annoyance for him.

But all in all, its all about your standards, if you feel he won't meet your standards, its your right to go for another person that meets your standards, you shouldn't marry out of pity or pressure or anything else except you really want to marry that person AFTER HIS RELIGION IS CONFIRMED.

WAllaahu a'lam.

wa alaikum assalam wa rahmatullahi wa barakatuh

I will start by mentioning that I am honestly very hesitant to comment because I don’t have the knowledge to be giving fatwa and I am not fully aware of the situation. I am only going to give you the advice given by the prophet (peace and blessing be upon him) and what the scholars encourage which is to marry someone who is religiously committed.
The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) who said: “A woman may be married for four things: her wealth, her lineage, her beauty and her religious commitment. Seek the one who is religiously-committed, may your hands be rubbed with dust (i.e., may you prosper).”

Based on my personal experiences, I think it’s much easier to marry someone who is either on the same level of piety and righteousness or slightly higher.

Secondly, I would strongly advice that the sister in question performs Iskhirhara, seeks more knowledge about the person she wants to marry and ask from advice from a trustworthy imam or shaykh.

I seek Allah’s forgiveness for whatever mistakes I make in this post.

And Allah knows best

FriendChoice:


If she is pious enough to draw the husband more closer to Allah (SWT). Then it's a welcome development and she will get reward for the Jihad.

But according to your post, she is not yet pious. She is only striving to become pious. I strongly believe that the husband might make her less pious as she was before marriage. Except if her piousness can make the Husband more religious, then I advocate such marriage.

Basically it defends on the wife's ability to be steadfast.

I know nothing but He the knower of Knowledge Knows.

Should a Muslim refer to himself or herself as pious? Aren't we all striving?

FriendChoice:


If she is pious enough to draw the husband more closer to Allah (SWT). Then it's a welcome development and she will get reward for the Jihad.

But according to your post, she is not yet pious. She is only striving to become pious. I strongly believe that the husband might make her less pious as she was before marriage. Except if her piousness can make the Husband more religious, then I advocate such marriage.

Basically it defends on the wife's ability to be steadfast.

I know nothing but He the knower of Knowledge Knows.

Jazakallahu khayran brother, He doesnt know so many simple things about islam, everything is strange to him, its all seem extreme to him just becos he doesnt know. We all need somebody that will assist us in deen Not somebody that will change us in other way round(faliyahuzubillahi). And this is one's life determinant

sherryshitt:
Asalam alaykum waramotullah. A question for all: Is it ideal or advisable to marry someone who isnt as religiously committed as u are.
Say for instance, a muslim lady who is striving to bcm more pious and trying to adhere to d basic principles of quran and sunnah now marries a rational muslim guy who hardly knows anything outside the 5pillars of islam. Thanks for ur swift response.
Cc: Lexiconkabir
Empiree
Contact17
Kazrem

It depends really

This is not a yes or no question. It depends on who he is as a person? His he interested in learning more, his he open to learning more, his he Alright with the wife's level of Islam, or he doesn't even understand why she has to use the hijab for example.

There isn't enough to give a proper advice.

Contact17:
wa alaikum assalam wa rahmatullahi wa barakatuh

I will start by mentioning that I am honestly very hesitant to comment because I don’t have the knowledge to be giving fatwa and I am not fully aware of the situation. I am only going to give you the advice given by the prophet (peace and blessing be upon him) and what the scholars encourage which is to marry someone who is religiously committed.
The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) who said: “A woman may be married for four things: her wealth, her lineage, her beauty and her religious commitment. Seek the one who is religiously-committed, may your hands be rubbed with dust (i.e., may you prosper).”

Based on my personal experiences, I think it’s much easier to marry someone who is either on the same level of piety and righteousness or slightly higher.

Secondly, I would strongly advice that the sister in question performs Iskhirhara, seeks more knowledge about the person she wants to marry and ask from advice from a trustworthy imam or shaykh.

I seek Allah’s forgiveness for whatever mistakes I make in this post.

And Allah knows best

yes sister sherryshitt istikhara is strongly adviced, i missed that in my post, Contact17 why don't you give her your thread on istikhara i think you opened a thread on that...

Contact17:
wa alaikum assalam wa rahmatullahi wa barakatuh

I will start by mentioning that I am honestly very hesitant to comment because I don’t have the knowledge to be giving fatwa and I am not fully aware of the situation. I am only going to give you the advice given by the prophet (peace and blessing be upon him) and what the scholars encourage which is to marry someone who is religiously committed.
The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) who said: “A woman may be married for four things: her wealth, her lineage, her beauty and her religious commitment. Seek the one who is religiously-committed, may your hands be rubbed with dust (i.e., may you prosper).”

Based on my personal experiences, I think it’s much easier to marry someone who is either on the same level of piety and righteousness or slightly higher.

Secondly, I would strongly advice that the sister in question performs Iskhirhara, seeks more knowledge about the person she wants to marry and ask from advice from a trustworthy imam or shaykh.

I seek Allah’s forgiveness for whatever mistakes I make in this post.

And Allah knows best

Jazakallahu khayran sis, Allah guides whom He will

Sissie:


Should a Muslim refer to himself or herself as pious? Aren't we all striving?

He shouldn't. We can only made assumptions based on deeds. By looking a person you can think this is a pious man but only God knows what is in the heart (It might be contrary to what we predict) Sometimes we assume by someone's character that he is good. That is basically what I mean by pious.

sherryshitt:

Jazakallahu khayran sis, Allah guides whom He will

Wa anti fa jazakallah khayra

This is the link on isthikara

https://www.nairaland.com/3225614/should-marry-him-what-advice

sherryshitt:


Jazakallahu khayran brother, He doesnt know so many simple things about islam, everything is strange to him, its all seem extreme to him just becos he doesnt know. We all need somebody that will assist us in deen Not somebody that will change us in other way round(faliyahuzubillahi). And this is one's life determinant

his he someone willing to learn?

lexiconkabir:


yes sister sherryshitt istikhara is strongly adviced, i missed that in my post, Contact17 why don't you give her your thread on istikhara i think you opened a thread on that...

Done

Sissie:


It depends really

This is not a yes or no question. It depends on who he is as a person? His he interested in learning more, his he open to learning more, his he Alright with the wife's level of Islam, or he doesn't even understand why she has to use the hijab for example.

There isn't enough to give a proper advice.

Jazakallahu khayran sis for taking time to input something.
He is someone who thinks as long as he adheres strictly to the 5pillars of islam, then thats it. He knows basically nothing abt the sunnah of rosul(pbuh). He thinks practising the sunnah is extreme, he doesnt know Zinah is a major and punishable sin in islam. These are all but few. The sister is question isnt satisfied with him, as he is not as religiously committed, but the family thinks he could change as Allah changes who He wills.

lexiconkabir:


his he someone willing to learn?

Yes, he says hes willing to improve, but what if he doesnt? What if he marries her and he changes back

sherryshitt:


Jazakallahu khayran brother, He doesnt know so many simple things about islam, everything is strange to him, its all seem extreme to him just becos he doesnt know. We all need somebody that will assist us in deen Not somebody that will change us in other way round(faliyahuzubillahi). And this is one's life determinant

Wa"anti aydan JazaKallahu Khairan. Such person needs to be oriented and educated by asking him, on what he taught to be extreme in the Islamic religion. Hopefully logical answers will change his mindset. I pray may Allah give him guidance and not just only him, but including I myself, you and the entire Muslim ummah. Ameen.

sherryshitt:


Yes, he says hes willing to improve, but what if he doesnt? What if he marries her and he changes back

I agree with you on this.

sherryshitt:

Jazakallahu khayran sis for taking time to input something.
He is someone who thinks as long as he adheres strictly to the 5pillars of islam, then thats it. He knows basically nothing abt the sunnah of rosul(pbuh). He thinks practising the sunnah is extreme, he doesnt know Zinah is a major and punishable sin in islam. These are all but few. The sister is question isnt satisfied with him, as he is not as religiously committed, but the family thinks he could change as Allah changes who He wills.

well, if thats the case and he is not willing to learn and the sister is not satisfied with him, i advice the sister go for someone else...

sherryshitt:


Yes, he says hes willing to improve, but what if he doesnt? What if he marries her and he changes back

well, that will be a risk, which is why istikhara is needed, once the istikhara is done with sincerity, Allaah will guide insha Allaah, so after the istikhara if the sister notice that things about the marriage are not going smoothly, she should back out.

sherryshitt:

Jazakallahu khayran sis for taking time to input something.
He is someone who thinks as long as he adheres strictly to the 5pillars of islam, then thats it. He knows basically nothing abt the sunnah of rosul(pbuh). He thinks practising the sunnah is extreme, he doesnt know Zinah is a major and punishable sin in islam. These are all but few. The sister is question isnt satisfied with him, as he is not as religiously committed, but the family thinks he could change as Allah changes who He wills.

Allah guides whomever he wills

It's one thing not to practice, it's another to think it is extreme.


It's one thing to commit Zina knowing it's a sin, it's another not to even know.


Istikhaarah is really important, one needs to seek Allah's guidance, and she needs to know that even marriage could be a test.

She should access the situation, it's always better to marry someone who you can strive for jannah with, can she take on the task of helping to guide him? Etc

May Allah guide her right. Amin

sherryshitt:
Asalam alaykum waramotullah. A question for all: Is it ideal or advisable to marry someone who isnt as religiously committed as u are.
Say for instance, a muslim lady who is striving to bcm more pious and trying to adhere to d basic principles of quran and sunnah now marries a rational muslim guy who hardly knows anything outside the 5pillars of islam. Thanks for ur swift response.
Cc: Lexiconkabir
Empiree
Contact17
Kazrem

In addition or reinforcement to all the advice that have been given, seek Allah's guidance and thereafter, be sincere to your conscience.

Jazakallahu khayran brothers and sisters, may Almighty Allah grant our heart desires. Asalam alaykum

Sissie has said it all.

sherryshitt:
.. he doesnt know Zinah is a major and punishable sin in islam.

This one is serious ooo! This should not be compromised!
Is he a shia?

MrOlai:


This one is serious ooo! This should not be compromised!

Is he a shia?

lol, from the look of things i don't think he will know what Shi'a or sunni is, except if he heard about them when they caused problem at Kaduna.

Just realized OP deactivated.

Hope she's okay

^^ She is ok with the look of things....