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Help Me... My Mum Is Making Me Depressed. / Pastor Gave Fake Prophecy That Destroyed My Marriage Of 10 Years / Help My Marriage Am Depressed (2) (3) (4)
| ... by Zidjay(f): 11:08pm On Nov 29, 2016 |
Thank you all 2 Likes |
| Re: ... by HungerBAD: 11:10pm On Nov 29, 2016 |
Went through your write up a couple of times. Don't even know how or where to start from. But let us start from the end of your write up, where you stated the family is not even appreciative you married their son. My best friend had an accident along the Benin/Ore Expressway 14 years ago, and he has been on a Wheelchair since then, so this is something personal for me. You seem to be a nice lady from your write up, and so my first question to you will be, why exactly did you get married to him?you never mentioned love in your write up, but you wanted a peaceful home. To me your move was very calculated and cold. There was no feelings involved, just that you wanted a stable home and you thought a wheelchair man would provide that, and also expected the family to be appreciative to you, so in other words,you think you are doing the family a favour. There is a strong misconception about people on wheelchairs, and that is, people usually think just because they cannot walk, and so their manhood is not supposed to work. And i make that reference to your sister in law and her crude reference to the paternity of your child. Forgive her, as she does not know better, neither do i. There is no justification for your husband sexting, but aside him blaming the devil when he got caught. Have you taken the time out to have a one on one chat with him, and ask him if there is something missing in your marriage that will make him want to start looking outside? I do not know you. I do not even know if this story is a figment of somebody's imagination, but my advice to you is to go back to the drawing board and make your marriage work. The first step will be to erase it from your head that you are doing the family a favour. 2 Likes 1 Share |
| Re: ... by daewoorazer(m): 11:12pm On Nov 29, 2016 |
I must be sincere, you have a great deal of work ahead of you. This ain't your cross alone, kindly tell ur dad and mum the situation of things. Let them organise a family meeting involving d 2 parents from both families and perhaps elders if any exist. Narrate your ordeal in d presence of both families and please, do not ever sound like you've done ur husband a favour by marrying him while u narrate ur ordeal, once that tone is sensed in ur Narrations, you've lost d game right before it started. I believe d issue will be amicably settled. 4 Likes 1 Share |
| Re: ... by dollyjoy(f): 11:13pm On Nov 29, 2016 |
They should "appreciate" you for marrying their son? Were you forced to   2 Likes |
| Re: ... by Zidjay(f): 11:15pm On Nov 29, 2016 |
dollyjoy:No, I wasn't. Thank you |
| Re: ... by BiafraBushBoy(m): 11:19pm On Nov 29, 2016 |
dollyjoy: Shut up my friend... do you know what dowry looks like?? They needed matured advice, not from toddlers.. I would have loved to insult you, but I appreciate nature for doing so... 8 Likes
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| Re: ... by kinggogo: 11:26pm On Nov 29, 2016 |
Some husbands r jst ungrateful demons. Sm1 dat's suppose to c u as his all in all. SMH If u cn do it, divorce his sorry asss and fyt for sole custody of ur child. Enuff is enuff Best of luck 2 Likes |
| Re: ... by BiafraBushBoy(m): 11:30pm On Nov 29, 2016 |
dollyjoy: I wonder if you even graduated from high school... look at your grammar.. *Ain't nobody got time* I didn't crawl out from a hole... I type from my big house!! Maybe from 1st December we stop seeing shitty comment like yours... #Dumb!! 8 Likes 1 Share |
| Re: ... by dollyjoy(f): 11:37pm On Nov 29, 2016 |
BiafraBushBoy:I didn't asked you that  On a lighter note, what prevented you from giving your "matured" advice? Why did you jumped on my mention like that? The last time i checked, we all are entitled to our various opinions and the way we choose to comment on issues. Eeerm(scratch head), you know data is now expensive, nobody would love to waste data on inconsequential stuffs and people these days, you know the way to go right? Swerveeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee.  |
| Re: ... by Mznaett: 11:38pm On Nov 29, 2016 |
Hmmm... |
| Re: ... by Nobody: 11:52pm On Nov 29, 2016 |
Hmmmmm.. The man and his family have insecurity issue. They wondered how a lady ( probably beautiful) would marry a man confine to a wheelchair. Like how ladies feel insecure when their man's ex is prettier than them .My lady this is your fight! A woman should build her home. .... You shouldn't have fought with your sister in law. You should have greeted her no matter what and left . After all you were to leave that day. My sister always say something... Oju aye is allowed Meaning... In the presence of an inlaw even when you don't like something they have done act like you like it or overlook it . Then you talk to your husband about it... My advice : Apologise to your husband, make him realize you love him and you don't see him less of a man . Call your sister in law apologise to her also. Your husband is your home so give him more attention... Inlaws will come and go, so don't let them be a source of problem to your family. May God help you 3 Likes 1 Share |
| Re: ... by Nobody: 11:54pm On Nov 29, 2016 |
dollyjoy:Bet why nah! You are derailing this thread already  |
| Re: ... by ekanDamie: 11:58pm On Nov 29, 2016 |
the truth is, inferiority complex from ur hubbys side has led to distrust. ur SIL comments bout u scamming her brother holds water. they feel there is no way a radiant 2legged woman like u would wanna marry a wheelchair bound, DAT u are upto something, prolly judging from the way u dress and adorn urself, dey feel u are just using the marriage to cover who u really are. that thers no way u would be enjoying ur marriage with a man that can't creep behind ur back n tickle u. they sort of feel intimidated by u, of course dey want their son to have a normal life despite he's predicament,but not all family are wise. a wise family will SUPPORT you but they on the other hand SUSPECT'S you.. it's a big deal pleasing dis kinda family, to me, I think u should focus more on getting ur husband's trust n affection, stop looking at him asif u have done him a favour marrying him, cos DAT could be influencing ur attitude too of which u may be oblivious of. at long run, meet with ur husband's parents to express ur emotions with them n what u initially desire before getting married. pray as well, prayer is key 3 Likes |
| Re: ... by dollyjoy(f): 12:00am On Nov 30, 2016 |
Diddyydiva:Lol, Diva, He jumped on my mentions to post trash. |
| Re: ... by Beamborla(f): 12:05am On Nov 30, 2016 |
Men! Some just can't be loyal and reasonable...even while confined to a wheelchair. The mistake you made was expecting him to be good because he's confined to a wheelchair. You also made the mistake of expecting his family to treat you like a god cos you agreed to marry their physically challenged son. Are you sure you don't rub it in his face when the opportunity presents itself? My inexperienced advice; Communication is key. You two really need to talk it out because his family would only treat you the way he presents you to them. And you on your part should try not to rub it in his face that he can't walk and all those emotional stuffs...blah blah blah. You guys should talk. If he refuses to change, give him the you-don't-exist-treatment small  3 Likes |
| Re: ... by Nobody: 12:05am On Nov 30, 2016 |
dollyjoy:probably your comment irked him... Let it slide biko... Let's help a sister outta trouble  |
| Re: ... by dollyjoy(f): 12:09am On Nov 30, 2016 |
Diddyydiva:He ought to have overlooked my comment and proffer his. |
| Re: ... by misspicy(f): 12:17am On Nov 30, 2016 |
I MARRIED HIM because I wanted to A PEACEFUL HOME DEVOID of A cheating husband, family brouhaha and the likes. Married for the right reasons to a wrong person, who told you a physically challenged man won't act or do things like his able counterparts? Do you even love that man? My dear humble yourself and apologize to his family...the Lord is your strength 4 Likes 2 Shares |
| Re: ... by Cuddlebugie(f): 12:22am On Nov 30, 2016 |
Going through your post, one will deduce you dived into the marriage for all the wrong reasons. So, you married a cripple (pardon my choice of word) thinking that's a sure bet to fidelity? Oh my !!! .... Is the foundation of your marriage built on true love or it's just a marriage of convenience? You did him a huge favour marrying him and his family will be eternally indebted to you cuz of that, right? If you do love that man and want the marriage, i'd advice you guys talk. Talk about issues bothering. Good communication is the bedrock of every healthy relationship |
| Re: ... by Nutase: 2:27am On Nov 30, 2016 |
When you marry for the wrong reasons posts like this are inevitable. Does being wheel chair bound paralyse his third and restless leg? I feel sorry for you but you have to dance to the beats you produced. You sound like someone with a complex looking for some acknowledgement from his family for doing them a "favour". Sorry dear you did not do what another woman can't do. If you can't face the heat the only option is too leave the kitchen. 2 Likes |
| Re: ... by Nobody: 3:53am On Nov 30, 2016 |
Beamborla: Abi o , if she knows she can't complete what she started, she shouldn't start at all. in-laws are crazy everywhere, that one no be today. Thats not an excuse. The man has his own fault sha. But she's sounding like this. Becuz its obvious he did the man a favor by marrying him. 1 Like |
| Re: ... by Nobody: 3:55am On Nov 30, 2016 |
misspicy: I'm quite sure the man is Rich, thats the only reason she married him & not all this bullshit talk about infidelity. Not that i'm supporting the man's evil promiscuous ways. She should get a divorce or face her reality. Period ! 1 Like |
| Re: ... by Viking007(m): 4:23am On Nov 30, 2016 |
Nutase:You've said it all. |
| Re: ... by TheEminentLaity: 5:36am On Nov 30, 2016 |
This is what I think...You already think you did him a favour by marrying him and it was so from the beginning. You may not say it, but most likely your demeanor fully expresses this. More so when there is resentment in your heart. I'm sure your husband has noticed it and perhaps shared this with his sister and family. No honorable man would want to gain favour out of pity. No man would want to feel less of a man or a human being, especially from his wife. One thing I know about women is that they really cannot conceal how they truly feel for very long. Perhaps that's why his sister would ask the question he probably would have wanted to ask. Your marriage can work, I think you have more work to do. You have to love him genuinely, rid yourself of empathy about his physical condition. I think he loves you but with your 'body language' you possibly create doubts and I don't think he feels he's in an advantageous position to fight. Talk to your husband, and you guys should resolve to make it work as a family and for your growing child. Make peace with his family, apologise to all of them, (and never expect your FIL to call you, the respectful thing is to call him, if need be) best to do it with your husband. Everybody plays the fool, not much of a deal about sorrys. You have more to lose if your marriage goes completely down south and it won't be the best for your child. Better to make allies than enemies. Best wishes in your home. Pray it turns out fine. 1 Like |
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